Life coach Stephanie Orlina describes how women came to her for business coaching but found the courage to leave their marriages instead. She uses the Weebles analogy—people wobble but don't fall when they have inner power—and emphasizes self-care, trusted friends, and compassionate mediation through divorce.
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Hey everybody, this is Scott Levin, Chief Peacekeeper, and I am here with Stephanie Orlina. How are you, Stephanie?
I'm good. How are you, Scott?
I'm doing great. Um, so Stephanie is a transformational life coach. She has a company called Power and Joy, and I just wanted to kind of take a few minutes to introduce people to Stephanie if you don't already know her and and have her talk about herself and tell her story a bit and just see where the conversation goes. So Stephanie, how did you get into coaching? How long have you been doing it? Tell us a little bit about your practice.
So I was in my mid-20s and started seeing a therapist and then started reading self-help books. So I've been doing this for several decades because I'm now 59. And so I didn't know that I could use all that knowledge and wisdom that I was gaining from all those books I was reading and using it in my own life. And then about, I'd say, 15 years ago, I heard about life coaching and I'm like, what's that? You know, it was still— wasn't— no one hardly even knew about it. And found out what it was and I'm like, oh my God, that's my jam. And so, um, I started, um, working with a coach and then I am self-educated and, um, and then just started helping people here and there. And it's been 11 years now. And I have a style of coaching that's very unique. And I utilize all of the wisdom and the tools and the techniques that I've learned over the years that I know work. And then the past few years, I'd say about 5 years ago, I was given this technique that really helped me access this innate power that I believe we all have. And, and then I started sharing it with my clients and seeing the transformation within them. And so it's, yeah, it's been pretty miraculous. I'm very thankful for it.
And in what ways are people finding you? And what, in what, like, is there some common sort of thing that, that, that results in them reaching out? Or is it just kind of stuckness or other, you know, where, where, when and where are people kind of finding you and needing you?
You know, I have worked with several women who didn't originally come to me. One of them came to me because she wanted to grow her business. And then a couple of months in with us working together, she told me that she didn't want to be in her marriage anymore. And so we didn't focus on that specifically, but I was teaching her all of these tools and techniques. And then she, after I think about 8 months, she was— made the decision to ask her husband for a divorce, and she was able to go through that process. And then her friend saw the, the shift and change in her, and then she came to me and said, Hey, I don't think you can help me, but I saw what you did for my friend. And same thing, she had been married for a very long time. They hadn't been living together for 20 years, but they were still married.
Wow.
And in the time that we were working together, she was able to begin the divorce process. Um, and I wish I had known you then, um, because you and I met a few years ago when I myself made the decision to leave my marriage. And, um, Wanted to do mediation, and, um, we found you. We both had agreed to work with you, and, and you are absolutely the chief peacemaker, Scott. Um, one of the things I loved about working with you is you were always very calm in our, our meetings, and that made a, a big difference for us. I know it did for me personally.
Well, I, I appreciate that. Um, you know, I try, I try my best to help people get to the— get through this process and not stuck, and, uh, Thank you, you know, for those kind words. They mean a lot. How are you— would you say that in your work that you're empowering people? Are you helping them find what that fire inside that might have been kind of dimmed? You know, are you helping them spark that? Or in what ways would you say that you can best kind of reach people?
What I do Is I'm able to— you know, you may be young, too young for this, but there was a toy long ago. It was called the Weebles, and the commercial was, Weebles wobble, but they don't fall down. And I like to use that analogy because what I do in my work is I'm able to help people access that inner power. And so we strengthen that foundation that's within each and everyone. So strengthen. So I always say, like, you know, Weebles wobble, but they don't fall down. So life's gonna happen. And sometimes it knocks us to our knees, and, and we may be out for years or for a very long time. What I tell them is, after we're working together, no matter what may happen in your life— divorce, death, loss of a job, whatever it may be— that you may fall to your knees, but you will get up, you will dust yourself off, and you will, you will get through it. And, and like I was saying to you, you know, when we spoke a week ago, is that I was able to show up in my divorce in a way that because of the work that I do and I share with others, I was able to be first and foremost loving to myself.
Mm-hmm.
And then also loving to my soon-to-be ex, because I believe that, you know, we all come together, um, because we love each other. You know, I, I married him because I loved him, and I feel like when the relationship ends, that we can end it with love as well.
I think that is so empowering and beautiful to hear. And obviously, you know, I see a lot of that, that love. People are surprised to hear that, Stephanie, when I tell them, you know, of course I see, you know, the other side of things and tough conversations and, you know, difficult personalities and difficult issues. But, you know, more often than not, I'm seeing a lot of care and love and respect and people that, you know, yes, they're ending their marriage, but they're respecting and honoring their past. And I think it's a really important message to deliver to the world because, you know, Hollywood and the internet teaches us that, you know, the alternative is the right way to go. And it's just, it's really wonderful for, you know, the people that are watching this to hear that it's possible and that you've been empowered to transition and I guess if this is too personal, we can even cut it out. But you say that following the end of the legal process, are there things that you did personally to kind of project forward and get yourself, build momentum and kind of put yourself in position to succeed following that end?
Oh, absolutely. I specifically set a little bit of money aside, spent a week aside and, you know, did a spa retreat to acknowledge all that I had gone through.
Yeah.
And the way I showed up, you know, and, um, I, and I, in the process, and it was a big deal. Like, none of us want to go through divorce. It's the last thing we want to do. But, you know, when we, when we realize that we need to, it's important to honor what we need and want. And, um, and so I absolutely did. And, um, And it's because I left a lot, my home and where I'd been for a couple of decades. And so the first few months of that transitioning were— I wasn't myself. But it was actually a year last month in November. And several months ago, I was like, yeah, I'm back. This is— my feet are steady. I'm grounded. And I think having support is really important. That's why, as a coach and you as a mediator, it's really important to surround ourselves with people who can support us, family and friends.
Yeah.
I only shared it with, with those people that I knew that would support me. A lot of people have a lot of opinions about ending marriages or whatever it may be, whatever we're doing that's challenging. So it's important to like, you know, keep it too close to our vest. Um, and to— it's hard enough to go through it. I don't need to deal with someone else's emotions and beliefs around it. So yeah.
Bringing their whole past or their experiences into your experience. It's exactly Well, Stephanie, tell people how they can find you. But before you do, I just want to congratulate you on the person that you are today and the way that you handled that process.
Thank you.
And that resilience and the rebirth and all those things that you've demonstrated is just really remarkable. And I encourage people to reach out to Stephanie. She's a special person that has specialized capabilities. Whether you're someone that's in my field looking for support for divorce or other transitioning times. So how could someone reach out to you?
So my website is powerinjoy.com. I'm also on Facebook, Power and Joy, and also on Instagram @powerandjoy.
Well, thank you so much. And we—
Thank you, Scott. I appreciate you inviting me. Of course.
