Attorney Jefferson explains why pushing an argument when someone feels unsafe backfires. Instead, say why you want to talk, acknowledge the timing is wrong, and ask when they're ready: "I know now's not the right time, so I'm not gonna press it, but when you're ready, will you just let me know?"
Don't make this mistake in your next argument. Hey, I'm Jefferson. I'm an attorney who teaches you the right way to argue. Now, one of the worst mistakes you can make in an argument is to operate only on your own timeline. If you try to bring up a subject when the other person does not feel safe or doesn't feel ready, that is a recipe for disaster. So when that other person puts out their spikes, immediately back up and do this. Number 1, tell them quickly why you're wanting to talk. Number 2, say that you can tell now isn't the right time. And 3, to put it back on their side of the court, ask them to tell you when they're ready. So it can sound as simple as this: "Hey, I just want to put us back on the same page. I know now's not the right time, so I'm not gonna press it, but when you're ready, will you just let me know?" So try that and follow me.
