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How to Stay Calm in an Argument

Name: How to Stay Calm in an Argument
Uploaded: 2024-12-10T14:00:34+00:00
Duration: 55 s
Channel: Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP
Description: In this concise instructional video, speaker Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP, outlines three actionable strategies for de‑escalating personal tension during an…

10 Dec 2024 · 1 min

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In this concise instructional video, speaker Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP, outlines three actionable strategies for de‑escalating personal tension during an argument. First, she advises verbalizing one’s emotions using phrases like “I can tell I’m getting frustrated,” which helps the speaker acknowledge and control feelings. Second, she recommends releasing physical tension through deep breathing and muscle relaxation to prevent the body’s stress responses such as yelling or crying. Third, she suggests intentionally slowing speech, using short, calm statements (e.g., “I need some space”), to lower emotional intensity. The video presents these steps as a simple, repeatable process for staying calm and maintaining constructive dialogue.

Chapters

How to stay calm in an argument. Number 1, say how you're feeling out loud. We're going to do that with the phrase, I can tell. I can tell I'm getting frustrated. I can tell I'm getting upset. I can tell I'm not ready to have this conversation. We say it out loud because when you claim it, you control it. Number 2, release your tension. You're so focused on what the other person is saying that you don't allow your body to release tension, so it does it for you. It makes you yell. It makes you cry. It makes you want to throw things, all to release tension. So to put it in more positive ways, release it by using your breath as much as you can and relax your muscles. And number 3, intentionally slow down your words. When you talk really fast, it ramps up that tension. We want to do the opposite, so slow your words down. For example, I just, I just need a break right now, okay? I need some space. I need some space. And that's how to calm yourself in an argument. So try that and follow me.