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How to Stop Over-Apologizing

Name: How to Stop Over-Apologizing
Uploaded: 2024-12-23T15:00:37+00:00
Duration: 52 s
Channel: Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP
Description: In this brief self‑help monologue, the speaker explains that constantly apologizing erodes personal power and links self‑worth to being an inconvenience…

23 Dec 2024 · 1 min

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In this brief self‑help monologue, the speaker explains that constantly apologizing erodes personal power and links self‑worth to being an inconvenience. The core argument is that apologizing signals a hidden plea for approval (“please still like me”). To break the habit, the speaker proposes two practical communication shifts: (1) when someone needs something from you, respond with gratitude—thank them for waiting, their patience, or their time—rather than a perfunctory apology; and (2) when you need something from others, state your request directly without prefacing it with an apology, e.g., “I need a moment of your time” instead of “I’m sorry to bother you.” This approach encourages assertiveness and healthier self‑valuation.

Chapters

How to stop over-apologizing. You know what I'm talking about. So sorry, I just need to clarify something real quick. So sorry, I'm just now seeing this. So sorry, I'm just now responding. When you over-apologize, you are draining your power because what you're really saying in those little so-sorry moments is, please still like me. And it is past time that you knew that your self-worth is not tied to how little of an inconvenience you can be. So here's a little trick. When somebody needs something from you, you thank them. Thank them for waiting. Thank them for their patience. Thank them for their time. When you need something from them, you just tell them what you want without apologizing. You tell them what you need. So instead of, I'm sorry to bother you, I need a moment of your time when you get a second. Instead of, hey, I'm sorry, I need to clarify, I need to add on to what you just said. You are asserting your needs, and that never needs an apology. So try that and follow me.