Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP, shows how to use "Did you mean..." questions to expose manipulative comments. The technique forces the speaker to confront their motive, creates discomfort that makes them pause and hedge, and rebalances the conversation in your favor.
Did you mean for that to sound a little manipulative? The did you mean questions, what they do is they put a big spotlight on the other person's behavior and it makes them have to think about what their motive was. And usually if it's a truly negative motive, like, did you say that to embarrass me? It forces them to now, like, they feel angst. They got called out. And now what they have to do is shift it back. They have to stop. They have to hedge. They have to put on the brakes and realize, whoa, whoa, whoa, I'm getting called out right here. I don't like that. I'm going to start looking bad. I don't want that. They'll turn that trajectory, and what they do is they lower, and now you're more balanced in the conversations. Did you mean
