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What to say to a bully

Name: What to say to a bully
Uploaded: 2024-10-13T14:01:00+00:00
Duration: 49 s
Channel: Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP
Description: In this brief instructional video, speaker Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP, outlines three concise verbal approaches for responding to a bully. The first strategy…

13 Oct 2024 · 1 min

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In this brief instructional video, speaker Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP, outlines three concise verbal approaches for responding to a bully. The first strategy is to calmly ask, “Are you okay?” which signals disapproval without giving the bully a reaction. The second strategy involves questioning the bully’s intent—e.g., “Did you mean to embarrass me?”—to mirror the impact of their behavior. The third strategy challenges the bully by asking whether their comment was driven by attention or insecurity, prompting self‑reflection. The speaker emphasizes that these tactics aim to de‑escalate the situation and make the bully reconsider future actions.

Chapters

What to say to a bully. Number 1, you're going to slowly ask the question, "Are you okay?" It signals to them that their behavior to the others around them is not okay, and most importantly, it doesn't give them the satisfaction of a reaction from you. Number 2, ask questions of intent. This sounds like, "Did you mean to embarrass me? Did you mean for that to offend me? Did you want to upset me or hurt me?" Or whatever it is, you're giving them a mirror to understand the consequences of their behavior. And number 3, say this: attention or insecurity? They're going to ask, what do you mean? You're going to respond, did you say that for attention or insecurity? And it'll make them think twice before saying something like that again. So try that and follow me.