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What to say to relate to someone

Name: What to say to relate to someone
Uploaded: 2024-10-11T14:00:51+00:00
Duration: 57 s
Channel: Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP
Description: In this brief instructional video, Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP, outlines three concrete steps for building genuine connection when someone shares something…

11 Oct 2024 · 1 min

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In this brief instructional video, Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP, outlines three concrete steps for building genuine connection when someone shares something important. First, avoid one‑upping by not immediately shifting the focus to your own story. Second, demonstrate interest by asking follow‑up questions such as “How do you feel about that?” to acknowledge the value of their experience. Third, after showing empathy, request permission before sharing a related personal anecdote, using phrases like “May I share something with you?” This sequence encourages respectful listening, validation, and mutually consensual sharing, fostering stronger interpersonal rapport.

Chapters

What to say to relate to someone. Number 1, when somebody shares something with you that is important to them or that they're proud of, avoid unintentionally one-upping them. That's when you put the spotlight on you and say something like, you know, there's this one time, and talk about yourself, or, you know, I had something similar happen to me once, and talk about yourself. You haven't earned that yet. You're not relating to the other person, you're just relating to yourself. Number 2, so instead, respond by asking to know just a little bit more. It can be as easy as, "So how do you feel about that?" or "Tell me more about that." Here you're relating to them by acknowledging that what they have and what they shared has value to you. And number 3, after you've acknowledged them, now you can share what you want to share. And you do that by asking for permission. For example, "May I share something with you?" or "I had something similar happen if you want to hear the story." And they're going to say yeah, because you put in the work to connect to them, they'll connect with you. And that's how you relate to someone. So try that. Don't follow me.