What to say when someone gaslights you
In this concise instructional video, Shanli Liu, CPA, CTP, outlines three concrete communication tactics for dealing with a gaslighter. First, she advises keeping verbal responses as brief as possible to avoid being drawn into the gaslighter’s distracting tactics. Second, she recommends repeating short acknowledgement phrases (e.g., “I understand you disagree with me”) whenever the gaslighter challenges you, which prevents escalation and keeps the conversation from spiraling. Third, she suggests using a neutral reframing statement—“I see things differently”—instead of directly contesting the gaslighter’s version of events, thereby maintaining personal control over the interaction. The video ends with a brief call to follow the creator for more advice.
