How I Became A Multi-Million Dollar Entrepreneur with Tracy O'Malley

I have used every single thing in my life for something beautiful today, 12 years ago, I couldn't have said that. I was a victim and I was angry. And that's why I use the coping mechanisms that I did. All of them, you name it.

Tracy. Welcome to Rock youk Money, Rock youk Life. How are you doing today?

So good. Excited to be here to talk about money and life.

I love it, I love it. Let's take our listeners back a little bit. As I like to do is what did you growing up? What did you learn about money? And tell us a little bit about your upbringing.

I love this topic because, you know, I'm almost 50 years old. And so back in the day when I was born, the, the men weren't in the labor and delivery room, you know, so. And there was no like reveal parties and things like that back in the day. And so my dad was in the waiting room chain smoking in the hospital.

Taking us back.

Yeah.

So after 30 something hours of labor, the doctor comes out and says, Mr. O', Malley, congratulations, you have a daughter. And he put out his cigarette and said, you know what, you can keep her, I don't want her. And he was totally joking. Totally. If you knew my dad, totally joking. However, my four year old ears heard that story and from that moment on, I kind of took on this Persona. Like, okay, I need to be as close to perfect and as close to what boys do to be worthy of acceptance, approval, love, attention. And so from that moment forward, I really paid attention to what men did, specifically sports. I've been a tomboy most of my life. I love sports. By the time I was four years old, I could say the entire lineup of all the Chicago teams, which is where I grew up, I watched how men drink and how they operated in business and money. And my dad, since he wanted a boy, kind of talked to me like I was a little young man. And I remember the messaging very clearly around money and power. And he always said, you make the money, you control the money, and that's where all the power is. And I remember that as a little girl, my little green eyes looking up at him like, okay, noted. And so that's kind of how I always operated. I always have had a work ethic and gritty and make it happen. And then when I got married, I kind of took over things. I was young, I was 21 years old and always have made money, I've lost money. My dad was super tight. He was raised by depression era parents, so he was super conservative with it. There was never enough. It was always like this lack mentality. And so when I did start making it, I was a little rebellious with it. I was more risky than my dad would have been. But I was also very aware. And I've had this yo yo effect because there's something in my mind for a long, long time that if I have money, not only do I have power, but I become abusive, which is kind of how my dad was. So I would make it, get to a certain point and then kind of like either be rebellious with it, sabotage it a little bit, because I don't want to be abusive. So I've worked really hard to break that and break that belief pattern because I know when money is in the right hands of the right people, beautiful things can be done with it. And so that's where the last decade or so I've kind of gone with my belief system around money.

Wow. So, first of all, thank you so much for sharing that beautiful insight. And it's so closely to the work related to the work I do around your money blueprint. And the beliefs are so. They're so insidious that even having an awareness around them doesn't necessarily evacuate them. You know, like, yeah, okay, I have a scarcity mindset or yeah, okay, I'm aware of the fact that when I have a lot of money, maybe there's a part of me that shows up that is aggressive or what have you. Because we modeled it right? The four year old little girl wanted to please daddy and wants love from daddy and affection from daddy and respect and for daddy to be proud. So we start to get rewarded for behaviors of the things that we think will lead to acceptance and love and then it becomes who we are in a great extent. Does that make sense?

Yeah. And if we don't, it's one thing to be aware of it, but if we don't repair it, we repeat it. And I've worked really hard to not just be aware of it, awareness is just part of it, action is just part of it. But you have to kind of acknowledge the roots of it and pull it up by the roots in order for it to not spread and infect your entire garden, so to speak.

I love that. And I use the metaphor of the eight gardens of our life. So I love the fact, I love that. Yeah, I divide my life into eight areas and I say you're always going to have weeds in some part of your life, Right. You tend to do your business, you're in really great shape, and then your relationships start to Develop some weeds or you're a great mom or dad, but you're out of shape. So you kind of try to make sure you weed the garden on a continual basis and make sure it's taken care of. And that's why I say to people, if we can handle the money part of your life, if we can get you to have passive income vehicles where you have money coming in when you're doing something else, like sleeping or sitting on the beach with a pina colada, it means you can also take the time to work on some of your childhood wounds or some of the things in your relationship that are going to take your own personal experience to another level. So tell us a little bit about how you have now.

Managed your finances. What do you do with money? What's your relationship with money?

I love that you brought up about passive income because one of the really great things about my dad and the thing that, you know, he pounded into my head, so to speak, when I was a little girl, he was a student of Warren Buffett, right? He followed him. And I remember my dad always saying, learn how to make money while you sleep. And I was like, I don't even know what that means.

You know, it wasn't until his death eight years ago that that kind of came into play. You know, he had a 12 day cancer diagnosis. And because I was working a corporate job, I couldn't just up and go.

I could, but I wouldn't get paid. I was a commissioned employee, made good.

Money, but if I didn't work, I didn't get paid. And I remember when the final day came for my dad, I remember being on the airplane just praying like, I never want to be in this position again and I need to figure out a way, put this opportunity in front of me and I'll make it happen. And so my dad passed away. I got some help because I had some coping mechanism. Issues with alcohol, food, codependency, anger, you name it, I coped with it. And you know, that reality of life is too short. What are you going to do with it? Came and whacked me upside the head at the age of 40 years old. So I got help.

I took my foundation down to the concrete and that's it. Wiped out everybody and everything in my network except my kids. That was it. And about six months later, I was introduced to a product line that I didn't even realize was a network marketing company. But I started taking the products within seven days. I was in love with it. I was being headhunted by all these corporate companies in the car industry. I did not want to go back into that industry because it was really toxic for me. And all of a sudden I googled this company. I was like, oh God. It's one of those things, right? One of those things where people run from you in the grocery store. Like, I remember Avon and the Mary Kay ladies early on, not knocking them. It's amazing. But I remember just like, oh God, please don't try and sell me lipstick.

Right?

So, you know, but I'd had this really life changing moment six months earlier losing my dad. And I was like, well, I love this product. I know how I feel. Why not share it and see what happens? And I made the commitment that I was gonna go all in with no social network. The single mom that went to rehab. Yeah, join my team. I'm the epitome of health and wellness, right. I can help you make a million dollars. But you know what? I believed in myself. I believed in the product. I believed that I was equipped and capable to make something happen. And I was committed to it. And within two years, I built strong leadership. And I only brought in about 82 people. But the compound effect of that and strong leadership development, which is my strength today and always has been those 82 people. I was able to gener generate a downline and an organization of 15,000 people which generated my first million dollar income in two years. Income, not revenue income. And now, you know, eight and a half years later, I have, I still have that organization, except it's up over 110,000 people. You know, I've made probably 5 or 6 million in the last eight years in that company and have a thriving coaching business. I do team organizations and leadership communication and leadership development and culture building. You know, I'm all about the passive income, real estate investing, stocks, options, all of that. I remember my dad's lessons very clearly. Make money while you sleep. That's how, that's how we become wealthy and that's how we can take the time to really heal some of those very wounds. I could not have done that without the time freedom that gave me the choices to do that. And as a single mom, my kids are in their 20s today and you know, I truly did break the generational patterns of codependency, addiction, Ms. Money Management. My kids are thriving entrepreneurs and money savers and money investors. And it's really beautiful to see that today that, you know, we do what we're taught, told and modeled. Right? That's why if we don't repair it we repeat it. And because of the new modeling that I show them today, this looks very different than it could have a decade ago because that's really what had me changing. Not only losing my dad, but witnessing my own teenagers start to model my own behavior. That wasn't the greatest.

Our teams, our organizations and our children do what we do, not what we say to do. So it's time we start walking our talk a little bit more.

Boom.

I love it.

I love it. So beautiful.

Got that mic, right?

Yeah, yeah. No, you, you can get a lot of value into a short period of time. I really appreciate that. I want to dig into a couple of things you said, if that's okay.

I think a lot of people are unaware of the fact that they pain manage.

With various things like you mentioned, right. With alcohol, drugs, pornography, and even in things that are accepted socially, like running marathons and doing things to get away from the feeling they're having and working out and overworking. But it's socially acceptable. Stacking your schedule so that you're super mom or super dad and you're the coach of the kids soccer team and you just never have a chance to listen to the not enoughness, the conversation of not enoughness. So can we talk a little bit about that inner narrative you might have had with yourself, which ultimately comes from the not enoughness. And then you're coping with whatever you coped with and then how you came through that.

Yeah, I see that a lot. And I had those behaviors, the healthy ones too. And we do justify it. And I think if 2020 taught us anything, and that's why I'm probably busier than ever, because the whole world was forced to slow down and we couldn't use some of these even healthier things or things we justify to occupy our mind to not be alone with ourselves. And thankfully I have done that work where I am fully comfortable being alone with myself today. And not. I mean, I love exercise, I love working, I love all the things, but I'm always kind of running it through a filter, like what's my motive here?

Is my motive to thrive is my motive to avoid. Is my motive to gain significance or certainty or truth or justice. But it takes a level of radical honesty with yourself and divine trust, quite honestly, to know that it's going to work out. It may not look the way that we anticipate it or choose it, but it always works out. And at my age, and I'm sure at your age, we've got enough proof in our lives that when crap goes Sideways. It doesn't feel real good when it's happening and it's kind of disruptive and sometimes leaves some wreckage along the way, but it always works out. And when we kind of look back and connect the dots, we can make sense of it and say, ah, okay. You know, I'm not one of those that say everything happens for a reason necessarily, but everything happens to teach us something. And either we choose to use it for something beautiful and amazing and water that garden, or we choose the other way to allow us to play small, to be a victim. I've experienced a lot of trauma in my life. Life growing up with an alcoholic father, an emotionally abandoning mother, sexual assaults, sexual abuse. You name it, I've experienced it. And every single one of those things, yes, it has left an imprint on my heart that, that hurt. But I have used every single thing in my life for something beautiful. Today, 12 years ago, I couldn't have said that I was a victim and I was angry. And that's why I use the coping mechanisms that I did. All of them, you name it, I've used all of them. And really allowing myself to look through, look at myself through the eyes of that four year old little girl that heard the story, because that's where it all began. Like everything that I have done and every coping mechanism I have comes from a scared four year old little girl trying to prove herself all the time. And when I look at her today, or when I catch myself in maybe a coping mechanism, when I run it through the filter of what's my motive here, sometimes it is ego, sometimes it is.

And instead of taking out the whipping stick on myself, which is what I used to do, and then going into the shame cycle and the coping mechanism cycle, I just have a conversation with that beautiful four year old little girl. I keep her picture on my desk right here and on my screensaver on my phone for a long, long time to remind me that I just have to help her rebuild a new belief system. And it doesn't matter what happened to her in the past. She's the most important child I'm raising is her. And I would never speak to a four year old the way that I used to speak to myself. And when I understood the fact that that 4 year old that's scared is driving this entire bus and that if I spoke to her with love, compassion, kindness and grace, that's how things would change. It's how she would learn to trust. When I did make a move that was scary for her, that she would lean into it instead of run from it. And it changed everything, Sam.