The Enneagram: Surprising Secrets to Life and Health Transformation with Tracy O'Malley

Hello and welcome to Biohacking with Brittany. I am so thrilled that you are joining this week for this episode. If you're new, this is a place where I talk about health and wellness and biohacking, and for all of the OG listeners, you know that so well. So thank you for tuning in. I did not release an episode on Tuesday. I have kind of been. I don't. I'm not saying, like, taking a step back, but I've been kind of been slowing down a little bit lately, and that's just kind of the season that I'm in. However, you know, for the rest of the month, the podcast will continue to produce two episodes a week, usually on Tuesdays and Fridays. And that's what we are doing for today. I've also been kind of taking a break from social media for a little bit and kind of reassessing where I'm at with it and how I want to use it in my business going forward. And, yeah, just kind of the future that I see with it. So kind of where I'm at right now is I love Instagram for Instagram stories and DMs. So the conversations I have in my DMs are probably the best on any platform and have a lot of depth and they're very personal and people ask me a lot of personal health questions about things that they're going through. And so I really value that, but I don't really value as much as I once did the content that is published on Instagram. So I'm sure that, like, people still do and it depends what. Depends what you're into and that type of thing. But I. I don't know, I just, like, don't find it as engaging as it once was. And so I've kind of, like, slowed down how much I'm posting on there. And right now I just use it as a place to connect with my current audience. So my goals for, like, growing on Instagram as aggressive as they once were have now kind of just slowed down in the season that I'm in right now. And I've like shifted my focus to much bigger things and more important things. That being said, I'm definitely focused on TikTok a lot and produce more content on TikTok than I do on Instagram right now. So TikTok is different. I would say that my DMs on TikTok are not nearly what they are on Instagram. I don't even really respond to them on TikTok. I mean, I guess I should, but they're kind of more random, but the reach on TikTok is better. And so that's kind of where I'm at with that. And I also love my podcast, obviously, and my newsletter that I send out once a week, which you can join on my website that goes out to, I think about 10,000 of you. And I really just appreciate that. And I also love when people reply to my newsletter, which is cool to see. So, like, for example, I did a holiday gift rundown recently and I had a couple people reply on their opinions of some of the products that I talked about. And it was great. Like, I. I'm totally open to that. And that's the point, right? It's. The point is to kind of foster this community. So, yeah, that's kind of just where I'm at with everything. And I, I said this on Instagram stories the other day. I am almost done my new page for opening up my online clinic and working with clients or patients one on one again, which I'm really excited about doing. And I think I'm just going to open it up for January. It doesn't really make sense to open it up in December. Right now it's the holidays and. And people aren't really thinking that far ahead or they're not really thinking about like their health in that way. So I think I'm going to just open it up for January and probably do some sort of promotion around it. I know that there's a wait list I have on my website for clients to work together. So if you're on that wait list, I'll probably be emailing you personally and giving you access to my availability faster and earlier than everybody else. And I will probably also give you some sort of discount or something like that depending on when you book. So that's kind of what that is gonna look like. And that online clinic is specialized in women's health, holistic health. So helping women with preconception health, fertility hormones, balancing hormones, menstrual cycle irregularities, pcos, regulating ovulation, endometriosis, anything that you can kind of think of that is in that realm. That's what the focus is on. So could be menopause, although I'm not an expert in menopause, but more towards the menstrual cycle, fertility, pregnancy, postpartum is where it's at right now. And then my course is dropping in February, my preconception health course. And I'm really excited about that. It's probably going to be my.

The piece of work that I'm most proud of to date in my life is that course. And there's multiple reasons for that, and I can't share that yet, but.

I think it's because it's so personal for me, first of all, and I.

Took so much time thinking about it.

I, you know, I obviously can't say a lot right now, but I really, really thought about how do we optimize our bodies before we start trying to conceive. And I did a lot of research and I listened to a lot of podcasts and have the books and everything, and I just didn't find a comprehensive program or cleanse that I felt was good enough for what I was looking for. So that's what's coming out in February. And I'm so proud of that, that course. And it's. Oh, I'm just so excited about it. I'm. Yeah, it's going to be really big. And. Yeah, I just hope it helps a lot of people, you know, and, and encourages people, men and women, to be proactive about your health before turning to things like IVF or IVI and understanding that you can optimize your health, you know, within minimum is 90 days is what I say. So within three months. And you can become a lot healthier through a program like that, through following these steps. And then you can assess your fertility and your status at that point and then start to try to conceive and see how you go and, and continue doing it while you're trying to conceive. I.

Yeah, I really just wish that there was more of a ownership and responsibility around that type of thing. And I'm going to do a lot of content in the new year about that. So stay tuned for that. And I hope you share that with the people in your life that you know who could use something like that, because it's certainly been helpful for me and the people who I have put through on that program have been. Been very successful. So, like I said, lots of stuff coming in the new year I'm excited about. Anyway, today's episode is all about the Enneagram, and it's a very different approach to the Enneagram than I.

Kind of have heard. So, you know, when people think of the Enneagram, they think like it's this personality test that you do, and you get this number, there's nine numbers, and you get a number, and you read about the number and you read about your strengths and your weaknesses and how you kind of show up in the world based on this number. But there isn't a Lot of depth sometimes to it or a lot of like application for how to use it in your life or your relationships or your work or your health, specifically your health. Like, I don't really see people talking about the Enneagram and your health. So today we dive into that. How do we take something like this and use it as a tool and come back to it day in and day out and stick to it? So it was, it was really interesting for everyone listening. When I did the Enneagram test, I was a three. And I will say that.

I did this test a few years ago and like we talk about on this podcast episode, a lot of these tests aren't accurate. So I need to go and do a full proper assessment, ideally with Tracy. She has a program and get assessed to see if I am a three or what number I actually am. So that's something I'm going to look into and I encourage you to definitely do that. You know, there's like these quick quizzes and it's, it's like really is that. Are those questions can they really evaluate your personality? You know, so definitely take a look at those. A shout out to buy optimizers. I think I mentioned this recently, but they came out with a brand new.

Supplement called Stress Guardian. And this is something that has a bunch of different adaptogenic herbs in it to help reduce your stress and manage your stress. This is really cool. They sent it to me. I loved it. And I actually sent some to my mom. Especially during this time of year. I think that there's a lot of stress that goes with the holidays, especially if you're hosting family or maybe you're traveling for the holidays. There's a lot of stress. Sometimes we get sick, sometimes we eat way more than normal or eat different foods or drink a lot of alcohol and maybe we're not exercising. So all of these ways that we can kind of stress the body and mind and it's really cool to have something like this that is full spectrum and holistic in nature that can really help support those stress levels. So Stress Guardian is fantastic for that and can really just help you get control over your stress, which I think is really important, which is why I helped my mom get some just so that she can, you know, manage this holiday stress better. So definitely check that out. You can use my discount code, biohackingbritney and you get 10% off stress guardian. And the website for that is stressguardian.com biohackingbritney. But with bioptimizers you get a discount on all their products. So I will link that in the show notes. They have fantastic products like a digestive enzyme blend for gluten which is smart and a full spectrum digestive enzymes blend which I love taking. I actually take it every day now which helps digest things like lactose and all of the different types of sugars and, and proteins and really helps make it easier for us to digest those things and not react to them. And then they also have a great probiotic blend and a magnesium. Those are the three that I take daily. And then now I have the stress guardian as I also need. So I will link all that in the show notes. It's also on my website. I've gotten such good feedback about my new website. If you go to it, you go click shop and click products, you can go and see all of the different products. I love to use the. There's like photos and videos of them. There's the link and the discount code right there. So it's so easy for you. And I really took a lot of time when I created that website because I wanted it to be pretty.

And aesthetically pleasing. I didn't want it to be some cheesy photo of a supplement bottle and a crappy link and just tacky, you know, I didn't want it to look tacky. So it's not tacky. And you can go take a look. There's a bunch of different biohacking longevity and wellness products on there. Everything from red light therapy to supplements to the bed pod cover that I use that cools or warms depending on the temperature that you like, which is eight sleep or there's. Oh my gosh, there's so much on there. There's just a lot of different things. There's also some beauty products, there's some clothing that I like that blocks EMF for women, which I think is important. And yeah, definitely go check it out. If you are like interested in these types of products. That's a, it's a great place for you to start. And last but not least, a shout out to AG1. This is such a foundational supplement and I can see why so many people like it. I like to use it in my water bottle. I just add a packet of it. I use the travel packs because it's like pre portioned and it's super easy and I just take this to ensure that I'm getting all my vitamins, minerals and enzymes and everything I need in a day. So everyone loves this. A lot of feedback I hear when people start it is it helps with their bowel movements. So maybe they were too regular or not regular enough and it kind of helps with that. And so I, I really do like AG1, so you can check that out and use my discount code. If you use my code, you get a year supply of vitamin D3 and K2 and that's a lot. I'm on vitamin D3. I take. I actually take a lot. Okay, I take 10,000 IUs a day. But I am in Canada and in Canada in the winter in Pacific Northwest we get basically no sun. So I have to be taking a lot to be honest. Anyway, enjoy this podcast episode with Tracy. It was phenomenal. She is just a whirl of fun and I it was so inspiring talking to her. If you want to connect with her, it's in my show notes and it's linked on my website on my podcast page. If you want to work with her or you know, get your Enneagram assessment, go for it. I think it's very useful, especially as it comes to our health and in our work and in our relationships. Enjoy this episode. You can catch me next week for another one. And as always, my DMs on Instagram are always open. If you want to email me, that's cool too. Infoiohackingbritney.com, super easy email address. I always respond to them and so just gimme a couple days. I'm not on there 247 anymore because I need some boundaries but I will respond to you within the week. So enjoy this and I will catch you next week for another episode. Welcome to Biohacking with Brittani. I am thrilled that you're listening. Today we are diving into the world of self discovery with Enneagram expert Tracy o'. Malley. This is another topic that I have never broached on my podcast, but have always been interested in and kind of dabbled first in this world of Enneagram a few years ago when I heard it on a different podcast. So we're going to talk all about what Enneagram is, how we can use it to transform our lives and our health, how people use it for business and entrepreneurship and even in relationships and also balancing feminine and masculine energy, which I think is very interesting. So Tracy brings a ton of unique insights and experts. She's guided top companies like Google and Amazon, which is really cool as well. So Tracy, welcome to the show.

So excited to be here and talk about this topic in regards to like optimizing our health and being so regulated that no matter what's happening around us and in our environment, we can move through it elegantly without throwing our whole body off. Off kilter.

Wow. Like, wouldn't we all love that?

So, for people.

Yeah, for people who have no idea what we're talking about. So let's dive into, first of all, what is the Enneagram? Like, what does that mean?

Well, depending on who you're listening to, there's all different ways to describe it. But because I'm somebody who's like, great, what's this thing and what's in it for me? You know, even how I was introduced to it, I really wanted nothing to do with it because I was like, so what? Like, why is this going to help me? And so when I'm asked this question, I usually explain it in a way that people will know right away why it's important and what's in it for you, so that you can not tune out the rest of the conversation, but be intrigued to see how this can actually help you in your life. And you know, how I like to explain it is, you know, it's this personality kind of archetype framework that when we have nature and nurture collide, sometimes we use the parts of our personality to survive, but the real flex is learning how to use the divine wiring of who we are to. To thrive, not just survive. Right. And so when I was learning about the Enneagram, understanding that each of the nine archetypes within the framework has a very distinct core motive and core fear, that doesn't really change. And, you know, when we know how to leverage that and see the blind spots around that, we can use the gifts and the not so pretty parts of our personality and leverage them to be the best version of ourself, the healthiest version of ourself. But it's, it's definitely motive based, not behavioral, behaviorally based, which, you know, if you've taken an online assessment, most of them are inaccurate about 65 to 70% of the time, because, I mean, AI is great and everything, but it can't really help you discern what you've experienced in your life in a little personality test online. So I like to say that too, like, don't just take that first result that, that ends up online for you, because chances are it's not right, but it's a great starting point.

Wow, that's so interesting because that's exactly what I did a few years ago. When I heard about it. I was like, okay, cool. It's this, you know, your, your initial reaction is, this is a personality test that's going to tell me more about myself so that I can understand myself better. So I, you know, I went and did the test. I don't even know which one I did. I don't remember. And then you get this answer and it's almost like horoscope type of thing. Like you read this and you're like, oh yeah, that's me, that's me for sure. And then you read all nine of them because there's nine different numbers and nine different person personalities. But then you kind of, you're kind of like, oh wait, actually I think I could see myself in all of these. Yeah. Which is good. Is, is that, is that true? Like, is there actually a little bit of every number kind of in you?

That's the goal. You know, you have a very unique perspective in which you view, see, fear, the world, right. But as we become more emotionally intelligent, intelligent stronger critical thinkers, we do have the ability to see the perspective of the other ones. But we do lean into ours most. It's kind of our default where we go to first. And I usually will say like, I've always been wired this way. I, from the time I was little I saw it. And then I also remember very distinctly when things in my environment and the household I grew up in, I had to alter the expression of that in order to survive in that environment. Didn't change who I was, but the expression of it changed through the years. And then I picked up some coping mechanisms that didn't help along the way. But the beauty of this Enneagram tool is bringing you back to who you were always designed to be before the world kind of kicked you in the teeth a little bit. But the goal is to be able to be open minded enough to see through the lens of all nine types at some point. But understanding where you default to first is where the magic of the compass and the framework and the system of the Enneagram type and the other cool part about it is we're way more than just our type, right. There's other tools in the toolbox, kind of like supplementation that are attached to each type to help you when your core Enneagram type and motive and fears aren't the right tool for the job. You have to be able to know what levers to pull so that you can move a little bit more effectively through life.

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. So essentially if you get an assessment and you say, okay, I'm this number, does that actually mean that you're kind of like that Number your whole life or can you actually change numbers at one point? Or do you think there's like a solid foundation there that kind of always stays?

I do believe there's a solid foundation kind of, you know, you know how I like to. You. You probably get this because of like, you know, how we can change our DNA gene expression, right? It doesn't necessarily change our DNA, but the expression of it, you know, when we're dealing with our health stuff, you know, I have MTHFR that gene expression. And I was like, well, wait a second, like, where did that come from? You know, I've always been maybe have a disposition to it, but it hadn't been expressed. Kind of the same thing with the Enneagram. Like, you have this, this unique makeup, but the expression of it absolutely changed. I don't believe your, your core motive and core fears do other ones do kind of blanket over it. But the, the, the way that I look at the Enneagram is you are who you are. And let's work with that so that we can know like the roadmap back to who you were always before, you know, you were taught, told and modeled to be something different or express something different.

Yeah, yeah, no, that, that makes complete sense. Like genetics versus epigenetics and. Yeah, how. How do you express that? I. Something that I found very interesting when I was going through your work is the fact that you take this framework and you apply it to businesses and entrepreneurs. Like, what a unique way to look at entrepreneurship or running a business. Or maybe, you know, all the corporate girlies out there listening, like, for sure. I'm curious, like, before we get into the health side of things, like, how does this actually impact how you show up at your job? Like, are certain numbers better at certain roles? Maybe at managers or like, maybe counselors working one on one or better at like, certain personalities. I'm just curious what your. What your take is.

Well, I believe that like, the healthiest of your type can do anything. I get asked that a lot. And also, like, what types work best together. Like, I think any healthy version of any type can do anything and be healthy in any relationship. However, let's just be real. Like, there are some types that are absolutely have a stronger, easier go to in certain areas of business and entrepreneurship and even in relationships. For sure, like, I am naturally wired to kind of step into the fire. Like, that is kind of my motive and the way that I'm wired. But how this played out, like, most of my adult career until the last 12 years was in A male dominated industry. And because of my enneagram type, I was able to easily slip into that. But when I transitioned 12 years ago and changed some things in my life and completely did an overhaul into the businesses that I was starting, I went from almost a hundred percent male dominated industry to almost the extreme opposite. And thank goodness I understood this information and knew how to integrate it. Because in order to lead other people, especially women, and especially women that are wired differently than me, I needed to be able to speak in a way that no matter how well intended I was or how much in integrity I was, if I wasn't speaking their language, it wouldn't land and I couldn't lead them effectively. And so what, what this helped me understand in business, first for myself. You know, to be a really strong leader, whether it's in your home or out in the business world, you have to be able to effectively lead yourself. And that means understanding, you know, not just how you're wired, but how other people might receive view. And it made sense why I was really good in the male dominated industry because that intensity was an asset there. But my intensity in a more female dominated business place could be easily misunderstood, misjudged, and then I couldn't do what I can do best. So what's cool about bringing this into business, you know, first is understanding yourself, right? But then understanding the people that you're communicating with. Whether you are a manager, an entrepreneur, you need to hire people, all those different types of things when you know what is at the root of what they're motivated by, what their core fear is, and you're in integrity and speak to that because you want to be better for them, you have a lot less conflict, you have a lot more productivity. People are seen, heard, understood and valued for who they are, which is probably the number one reason why people leave positions. It's not because of money. It's mostly because they don't feel seen, heard, understood or valued or there's not a growth opportunity. So having this kind of understanding and knowing how to implement it, because information does not equal transformation, right? In anything. It's what we do with that information, how we integrate it, that can transform a business. The other thing with like Covid, you know, when everything went remote and now most companies are doing everything virtually or remotely, you know, to be able to lead people without them being in your energy all the time is a sweet spot. You got to learn too. And having this information can help you do that. Companies and businesses are having to do a lot more with less people so having the right people and knowing how to communicate with them effectively will allow you to do a lot more with a lot less people. So those are just a few ways that like these companies that have brought me in, you know, culture building is a huge thing. This is something that, you know, a lot of times I think we misjudge people unintentionally, especially people that operate a little bit differently than, than we do. And this language of the enneagram kind of takes that judgment and taking crap personally. It definitely alleviates it. It doesn't eliminate it altogether, obviously, because we're humans, but it really, instead of everything feeling so personal, we can start to look at everybody else like, ah, they say things like this because of their motives, not because of me. And you know, you take that into your home life, that's a whole game changer in of itself too.

Yeah, man, I, I love that you, you said that. I was just talking to a family member today who takes things so personally and I had to remind them that when this happened with this person at work and you were triggered and you were hurt by it, like, let's actually look at where that person is coming from and what, what are they actually upset about? Right? Like, what are they actually angry about? And you're just in the line of fire and, and it's, it's kind of hard to, to get wrapped up in that. But I like that you talk about self awareness because it does take a level of self awareness to not take things so personally and think it's all about you. Yeah.

I'm not saying it doesn't feel personal because I'll tell you something, I know this, I teach this. Like I'm a leading expert in teaching this. And when our biggest fear or, you know, the things that motivate us are going to be compromised, I'm telling you what, no matter how self aware you are, it might feel personal for a moment, but that power of the pause and saying, okay, like, let's take my own shit out of this for a second and let me kind of understand. Not like bypassing our own feelings, not like, you know, excusing crappy behavior or anything like that, but like, let's pause for a moment and see kind of where this might be rooted for them before I blow this out of proportion and make it worse. And I'm feisty, I like to fight. But you know what, you gotta be fighting the right battles because there's a lot more at stake if you start fighting battles that aren't yours. And you know that, you know, our health is, will definitely take the hits.

Yeah, I just, I love that so much. I think there's so much power there. And self awareness is certainly like a muscle, right? Like, the more that we can work on it, the better it is. Like my self awareness today compared to five years ago, compared to 10 years ago. Wow.

Yeah, same for a time like, like we all kind of like we, we want a JLO booty, right? Like, who doesn't want a JLO booty? But we can, we can look up like Google her workouts, we can even watch YouTube, we can write it all down. But unless we're putting the reps in in the gym, we're never going to build those muscles. And this muscle, the self awareness, the self acknowledgment, the effective, compassionate action that we need to take, that's the rep. Those are the reps that we need to put in in order for this to really be a powerful tool in our life and for us when, when all is breaking loose. I strongly don't recommend you learning about this when you're in crisis. Like I was, you know, I was learning this because all hell was breaking loose in my life. It's a lot easier to put the reps in when we choose it rather than when it's being chosen for us. For sure. All right.

I know that so many of us struggle with our hormones. We have a lot of confusion around our menstrual cycles, ovulation, having our periods, regulating it, and really just minimizing the symptoms that we often deal with. I have been there. I've had a mild PCOS diagnosis, I have had irregular cycles since I've been off birth control. I've had a ovarian cyst. And honestly, I've been through a lot when it comes to hormones in the last few years. So out of that I really taught myself about cycle syncing. And this is the idea that during different phases of the cycle, we are doing different things, we are eating different foods, taking different supplements or drinking different teas for the nutrients, exercising differently in response to where our hormones are at at that time. And through living in this ebb and flow of our cycle, we can actually feel better, we can look better, our hormones are happier, we're mentally better, we can sleep better. And this is exactly what I found. So I took everything that I did, I put it into an easy peasy guide for you. It's called the Ebb and Flow Cycle Guide. It's on my website. Go and grab it right now. This is Literally going to solve all of your hormone issues. I'm not kidding. It's so, so good. And it's so easy to read as well. I also added in a part about seed cycling because I know so many of you are interested in seed cycling as well. So that means what seeds do we take during which phase of the cycle? These seeds have different phytonutrients in it that can help with the different hormones during the different phases. And I've also included over 30 recipes that are super tasty as a bonus. So these recipes are designed for the different phases so you can have certain ones during your period during ovulation and things like that. And of course I included biohacks. I included which biohacks to do around ovulation to optimize that how, how to optimize your menstrual cycle or your menstruation during your period and everything like that. Everything from castor oil packs to acupuncture to red light therapy to healing baths. That, that I love. That is what I did. So this is my ebb and flow cycle guide. You can grab it on my website right now, biohackingbritney.com go for it and I hope you really enjoy it. There's been over 500 that have been bought already, which is so amazing to see and I'm just so thankful that I get to help women with their hormones and on their health journey. Yeah, absolutely. So how do you recommend somebody become more self aware? Like it seems like such a not a woo woo thing, but it's not tangible. Right? Like, so it's like this, okay, so you're aware of your thoughts, you're aware of your actions, you're aware of how you're impacting other people. But how, like, how do you practice that muscle? I mean, do you just put like sticky notes on the fridge and you're like, okay, remember to think about everything that you're doing.

Like, yeah, no, I wish it was that simple, but that helps. I mean, I'm a firm believer that, you know, those kind of things. It's better than not doing anything, but it's not gonna. You know, I think most of us, especially your audience in particular, have had some kind of stuff going on within their body that they don't understand. Right. And I've been in that journey and it's so frustrating. And the very thing is, is that body of ours that we've been gifted is the ultimate compass of all next to our intuition. And for most of us, especially if you've experienced any kind of trauma of any sort, We've learned very quickly how to bypass out of the ultimate compass of self awareness of all. And that is that intuition, which is a divine knowing, right? And our body, which is fully aware of crap even before our head, our heart or our instincts can kick in. But I think most of us have learned how to be like, okay, we feel the tinge in our. In our intuition, or our body's trying to tell us something. And if you're like me and really stubborn, you're like, yeah, that's cute, but I'm going to do it my way, right? And that's where we default into the parts of our personality that don't help us so much. It maybe helps us get through some hard things and survive, but to be our optimal self, no. And so I think number one, and it's perfect for this audience, is being very in tune with what your body's trying to tell you. And I know if you're experiencing hard things going on in your body, that you don't understand how frustrating and scary that can be. But I'm going to say this right now. If I had heard somebody say this to me probably 10 years ago, I'd be like, that's real cute. Shut up, right? But until I experienced my own kind of health struggles and. And recognized, wow, my body had been trying to tell me something all along, I probably wouldn't have bought into that. But the first two ultimate compasses of self awareness are our intuition and our body. But so often we want to get to results quickly that we try to, like, sweep that under the rug. It's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I feel that. I know that's happening, but tell me what I need to do. We skip from awareness to action without acknowledging maybe how we got there. And self awareness is one thing, but it's the self acknowledgment. And I'm going to asterisk this with insane amounts of compassion for ourselves. So many of us have awareness, but then we have guilt, we beat ourselves up, we have shame, or we have judgment. And then it's like, just give me the actions I need to take to make this stop. But it's this part in the acknowledging kind of how we got here. This is why the framework of the Enneagram is really powerful, to meet ourselves with compassion so that we aren't just going from awareness to action, Awareness to action. Because that's just like slapping band aids all over the place.

It's understanding, okay, what got us here and how can we compassionately understand it and move forward so that we aren't repeating cycles physically and emotionally.

I think that's so important and there's such a, such an importance place on intuition, but we often forget about it. And I kind of see this in the health optimization, biohacking world of, okay, let me track everything and get all this data and I have my sleep tracker and my activity tracker and I get my blood tested and all this stuff. But it's also kind of like, okay, but what is your intuition saying about your health? What, what do you actually think, you know, might be going on? And, and I think there should be like an interplay of both personally. But sometimes it's.

Yeah, but oftentimes it, it serves as a spiritual bypass. And honestly you might get some answers, but you're just kicking the can down the street. Trust me. And take it from somebody who tried to bypass the, the system altogether, it doesn't end well when we do that ever. I mean, I think it's really important to have the data. It really is because you kind of have to know kind of what you're working with. But the emotional toll that is happening within your body is so important and is very much in line with what is going on.

Yeah. And those emotions and those thoughts can't necessarily be tracked and put into an app, you know.

Absolutely not. There's no macro formula for emotional intelligence, y'. All.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. So I, I think there has to be some sort of. Yeah. Interplay of. Yeah.

You know, kind of like business, you know, like business wise. A lot of people want the strategy, Give me the strategy, tell me what to do, tell me what to do. And they bring me in. I'm like, well, tell me how you feel about this.

And.

And they're like, oh, I don't want to face that. I'm like, well, all the strategy in the world might move the needle for a second, but until we understand why this needle keeps moving backwards for you, it's just going to keep happening. And the problem is you're going to feel worse because you know better, but you're not doing better. So how about we just like, look at this now and deal with it so that when you actually have the strategy, whether it's for your business or for your health, it's sustainable and it feels really freaking good because you know that you're doing them in, in tandem with each other, not just trying to like, like make this work over here so we don't have to deal with this.

Yeah. You know, it also Sounds very much like masculine versus feminine. And I see this even, like, in my relationships of women are like, you know, we're generalizing typically, like, women are more feelers. I feel like this. These are the sentences we use. Whereas, you know, masculine energy is a lot of not wording things like that and not necessarily stepping into feelings. It's more of like, you know, let me just make a decision based on the variables that I see in front of me, not necessarily how I feel inside. Is that kind of what you see playing out when you work with these energies as well?

Well, I. I do sometimes see that. Like, I. I think that all enneagram types can be in their masculine or fe. There are definitely some types that lean heavier one way versus the other. And because, you know, the way that I'm wired, I can speak and be in my masculine energy a lot easier because of the fears. Like, if you looked at the fear of each enneagram type, you know, my fear is being betrayed and violated and put in a vulnerable situation. So, you know, that masculine energy of protective kind of, you know, I need to protect myself at all costs. Like, that is my easier go to than going into some of the. The more feminine feelings of expressing sadness and. And things like that. So what's cool about this also is when you understand what your core fear is, you're able to regulate and harmonize the masculine and feminine because they're both super duper important. So important. And, you know, when you kind of can get to the root of what's going on and what's triggering you and. And why you respond a certain way. Why the why behind why you respond a certain way. You're able to regulate that and harmonize it so that you can flow in whatever area of your life you're trying to find harmony in, whether it's, you know, in your personal relationships, your personal health, your career, parenting, whatever that looks like for you.

Yeah, I. I totally agree with what you're saying. And I think even for myself as an entrepreneur, it's very easy to step into the masculine energy of. Let's get so much done. Let me just, like, work so hard, work on weekends. I don't even count the hours. Like, do you know what I mean? Like, here's my to do list. I'm just gonna do it. All right? And that is not feminine. Like, feminine is like, softer and balanced and being able to do things that kind of create.

Yeah.

Be creative. That's. That's a great example. And until I started learning about, like, masculine and feminine Energy, maybe a couple years ago, I didn't understand that. Like, I didn't understand that, hey, if I'm in my masculine 90% of my days, this is what it's going to do to my, my health, my relationships. And it, it was tough to learn, to be honest. It was, it was tough to learn.

It's very humbling. You know, thankfully you're young enough to, and have exposure to this. You know, I was in my 40s when I was learning this and like when I, you know, kind of look back at my life not just, you know, as a partner to somebody and I was formally married, but as a mom and, and my own personal health, like, thank goodness I understood this because it would been, it would have been very easy for me to beat myself up, shame myself and all the things. It's like, okay, and this goes for anybody listening. When we know better, we can do better. But if you meet yourself with the judgment, shame, the shame stick, or all the things, you're going to make it worse. Like, nothing good and nothing will be changed with shame, judgment, and, and all the crappy things we say to ourself attached. The only way we can truly change and break the cycle is through compassion. And so just know that like most of us and just trust me with my wisdom of age here. Like most of us come by most of this stuff so innocently. And I know if you were speaking to a beautiful four year old toddler sitting next to you, you wouldn't beat the crap out of them emotionally. So, you know, that's usually about the age where we started to kind of discern and, and change our beliefs and our thoughts and the way that we express them out in the world based on things that happened in our life. So, you know, meeting yourself there will allow you to make the changes pos that are necessary for you to live the healthiest life possible.

Yeah. Oh, I love that so much. So for people listening, you know, maybe they're feeling like they might be more in their masculine or more in their feminine. Is it through compassion that you recommend getting back to balance, or do you think there's other pieces of the puzzle that can kind of help them as well?

Well, I think compassion is helpful, but if you're like me, I'd be like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, just tell me what I need to do, right? Like, and it's hard, and it's hard to kind of articulate what compassion means because a lot of people, even those of us that lean into more of the feminine energy, they might think they're being compassionate, but you're actually enabling or you're maybe judging somebody else or you're finding your worth through being such a helper. Like helping doesn't mean compassion. Compassion means like first of all not self abandoning yourself, right? Like you can have compassion for somebody and it's still not be okay with their be, you know, it's not okay with their behavior and how they're being right. You, you can't have compassion for yourself, but in the same breath or thought be annihilating yourself. This compassion is unconditional commitment to saying, okay, there's something deeper here, let's take a deeper look. And you know, we all came into this world innocent, we all did, right? And let's go back as far as we can to try and find that. Let's go back, let's go back. And honestly, I walk around the world and this will help those of you that maybe find yourself judging others or you take a lot of things personal. And I used to judge people all the time. Like I was like, oh, they're just weak, they're just weak. But I try to look at everyone as though I'm looking at the four year old version of themself. And this goes for people that I love, people that I know, people that I lead and strangers that I meet, you know, because when you look at some through the lens of like they were once a four year old and what did that look like for them? Because a lot of the salty, crappy behavior we see in other people and in ourselves started back then with a belief system that got altered in some way. And so that that might be helpful for you to soften a little bit. It doesn't mean it's not going to hurt. It doesn't mean that crap doesn't feel personal from time to time, but that will at least allow you to slow your roll and get more into that so you can find the harmony.

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Easier said than done.

People are. Yeah, for sure, for sure. Especially when you're triggered right like and you have maybe a heightened sense of emotion. You're not going to suddenly be like oh yeah, what were you like at 4 years old? But you know, if you write it down and maybe you see it or you're. Yeah, you, you exactly exercise the muscle of it, then I think it is something that you could continue to do and I, I think that's a good idea. I also love that you talk about trauma as well and this is interesting because you know the in your enneagram is different personalities and it doesn't necessarily mean, you know, certain traumas happen to certain personalities, but it can mean that you heal differently from that trauma. So like I would love for you to just kind of talk to that point and how can we use something like the enneagram to facilitate healing and potentially overcoming this trauma that maybe we had in our childhood or, or more recent.

Yeah, I love that you say that. Like we all have trauma and some of it, it doesn't, it doesn't discriminate. It honestly doesn't. And it doesn't say, you know, I'm gonna give all the enneagram threes this kind of trauma and. Because they can. No it's. But it definitely can dictate how we respond to it and how we move through it or go around it or all the things. So you know, I've experienced a lot of trauma in my life. I grew up in an alcoholic home. There was sexual abuse, there was, you know, physical stuff going on. I've been in abusive relationships in my life and you know, the stuff kept happening. I'm not saying that I was to be A fault for a lot of it. You know, I did come by a lot of it very innocently. I was a child. But how I responded to it was very much in line with my Enneagram type. And when I was learning about this, you know, 12 years ago, ironically, from a therapist to kind of deal with all my coping mechanisms that weren't serving me very well, I've pretty much used every coping mechanism except drugs to deal with my emotions. And when I was learning about myself as an enneagram 8, understanding that the biggest fear of an 8 is being betrayed, violated, or put in a vulnerable situation. And my core motive at the root of everything that I do is to be strong and powerful. And although that helped protect me and keep people at arm's length most of my life, especially after the effects of trauma, it also shielded my own feminine energy. It shielded compassion from me, and it kept me from getting to the root of the things that would help me heal from those traumas, which is honoring the sad parts of that, which means dealing with the full scope of grief. Grief. Not just the angry parts of grief, but the full scope of grief. And when you know your Enneagram type and know where that motive is and where that fear is, when we're talking about trauma and the things that we resist in grieving. Right. There are certain types that absolutely don't have a hard time with sad feelings. I have an extremely hard time with sad feelings because it makes me feel weak and less powerful. Right. And that's my motive and everything. But knowing that, it's like to really get to acceptance and transformation within the grieving process, whether it's a trauma or an old identity, you have to be willing to feel the full scope of the emotional experience. And for certain types, certain emotions are harder for us to deal with, including, you know, a health journey. Right. If you haven't seen the movie Inside Out, I highly recommend it whether you have children or not, because that movie really put in perspective. Because I would judge sadness, I would judge fear. Again, going off motive of the Enneagram 8, which is what I am. Everything I do is motivated by being strong and powerful. Sadness and fear have no room in that. Right. But I can recalibrate what my measuring stick for, what strong means today. And that movie made me fall in love with the characters there. There are these cute little characters that are all the emotions that we need to feel and how important each one of them are for the full journey. And I needed to be able to fall in love with sadness. I needed to Be able to fall in love with fear doesn't mean I enjoy it as much. But if I truly want to get to transformation in my life, and this goes for anybody listening right now, whether it's your health, your relationships, your traumas, your career, you have to be able to embrace the full scope of the emotional experience, not just the ones that make your Enneagram type feel powerful and strong. I love that. It was a game changer. It was a game changer for me. I still don't love. I still don't love it, but I.

Go there and I actually love that movie. And the second one is coming out next year. I know. I can't wait. Yeah. And I. I was obsessed with it because I thought it was so creative to take emotions and give them a character. And it's exactly like you said. It's like, okay, now I can actually understand sadness. And, like, what a powerful movie for kids, but also for adults.

Like, oh, it had me in the field position, girl. I was bawling my face off. I loved it.

Yeah. You know, like, just. Let's just identify these things as, like, tangible things by giving them a character. It's just brilliant. So I definitely recommend people watching Inside Out. Exactly. Exactly.

Not one is better than the other. And not. And same thing with the Enneagram. Like, there is not one Enneagram type that is better than the other. The full nine different ways in which we see the world are very, very, very important. And when we don't take things as personal and we don't, like, lead with judgment or shame or anger or any of the other things, and we are open, honest, and willing to look at the perspectives of the other eight types that are different from us. Guess what you're going to experience? You're going to experience a more fulfilling, connected, supported, and happy life. You really, really will.

Yeah, I love that. What do you hear as the common kind of misconceptions about the Enneagram?

You know, kind of like what you said. Oh, it's like astrology, which I love. I, you know, I am definitely open to any forms of understanding myself a little bit better. Right. And the whole reason I do what I do now is because it became trendy and it pissed me off. Like, not because I didn't hop on the trend because I could take advantage of it. I hopped on it because I was mad about the misconceptions that it was just this cutesy little trendy thing and I'd already been using it for seven years in my life, not even speaking of it. But I saw people minimizing the power and beauty of it. And I was like, kind of like with biohacking, it's like, we gotta talk about it once we know that something can really help. And that's how I felt about the Enneagram. Like, you guys are missing the whole point. But a lot of the information that was out there was just information. It wasn't really showing anybody what to do with this. And so that's why I came out with it. So the misconception is, is that, like, great, this is going to put a label on me or put me in a box or make excuses for crappy behavior. And yeah, if we're using it out of integrity or using it to manipulate. You're absolutely right. This tool can not be great. Just like any tool in any toolbox, when we use it with wrong intent or out of integrity, it's not good. But when it's used with this beautiful understanding that I want to understand better. I want to understand myself, I want to understand you, I want to understand the people. I want to understand humanity better. That's when we can use this tool for something beautiful. So it's not a label system. It's not a box we put anybody in. It's not a weapon unless you use it that way. But it really can have the ability to keep you rooted in a faith of your understanding. It can help you stay rooted and honoring that intuition. It can allow you to regulate your nervous system at a faster pace. But you have to be willing to not just take in the information, but start integrating it and building the spiritual muscles, practicing using this for it to be the most effective thing in your life.

I love that. Yeah, that. That makes a lot of sense. And that was what I was going to ask you is, okay, so say somebody finds out their number and their personality and, you know, they read through it as we do, and they're all excited and stuff like that. How do you actually go from that point to applying these principles to your daily life and your health and your routines? Like, how do you make it something that isn't just an article that you read once and it's actually a part of your life now?

Yeah, huge information. Like, that's the thing. Once you're typed accurately, which, you know, that's the. The hard part about this is because of the accessibility online to any kind of free quiz, which I hate when people. I took the quiz. It's not a quiz. Oh, my gosh. You know, having the right information is key first and Foremost. And, you know, it's kind of two ways to go about it. You either go real slow and take your time and figure it out, and that can be frustrating, or you have somebody like me who does this day in and day out and can help kind of guide you that way. But once you have the right information, what I tell people is, I don't need you studying about your Enneagram type because you do that by default. You do that in your sleep. And it's kind of like doing a DIY project. Having the right tool for the job is so important, but so many of us by default lead with our core motives and our core fears, and that isn't always the right tool for the job, right. If I led with my eightness and my eight tools all the time, there is no way I could do the work that I do. There's no way that I could be the mother that I am today or the partner that I am. And so what I tell people is, there's framework attached to your type. We have these things called wings. We have growth numbers. We have stress numbers. We have our tri type, which is bringing in more components to your point, of our ability to embody more of the framework of the enneagram rather than just our type in order to support our core type and our core motives and our core fears. It's kind of like if you think about your favorite movies, right? Very rarely is our favorite movie because of the main character. Usually it's the supporting cast kind of bookending the main character. That's usually why we love a movie. Same thing with our enneagram type. I had to fall in love with the wings, which are these supportive tools within the framework. I had to fall in love with what my growth number looked like, even though it scared the crap out of me. I had to understand, like, what my stress number looked like as a compass. So when I was kind of going off that that edge, I would have these other supplemental tools in my toolbox in order to support the parts of my core type that don't serve me right. So a lot of times I'll tell people, I want you to study your wings, and I want you to study your growth number, and I want you to study your stress number. Those are four types that aren't your type. They're never how you're going to be motivated. They're never going to be how you fear, but they are the very thing that will pull you out of the depths of dysfunction. Fear, anger, anxiety, sadness, and all the things so that's usually how we start kind of implementing that, but they're not our default. So they're harder muscles to build, but with consistency and an unconditional commitment to it. When you really need those things, they'll be strong and ready to rock.

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Well, I think it's amazing the more that people are open to tools. Right. It does get some shade thrown, which I get that, like not every tool is going to speak in a way that everybody agrees with and I understand that. But I mean, the fact that, you know, a couple different teams at Google have brought me in and Amazon and John Deere and YouTube and Facebook and law offices and medical practices and, you know, all these different kind of industries have brought me in to give their people a common language that helps us understand each other and recognize the gifts and the talents and the strengths of each of us and also have compassion for. For the blind spots that each of us have. The fact that companies like that are bringing somebody like me in makes me feel reassured that we're open to emotional intelligence. And that culture is really the foundation for us to make sense of a really hard world right now and confusing times. Like, we're going to need more tools in our toolbox if the world continues the way it has been the last few years. So I am optimistic that, you know, with this tool in the right hands, we can move mountains faster. So keep spreading the word about it.

Yeah, I love that. And I. I totally agree. We've had such a challenging last few years, and who's to say what the next few years are going to look like? And I think that's why tools like this are becoming so popular, is because people are just kind of at their end. They're like, okay, I need to try something different. What I've done is not working. It's not enough. And it's beautiful to see the transformations that can come from people stepping outside of their comfort zones and bringing in tools like this.

Yeah. When I think about, you know, a lot of times when I'm talking about this with people and they. They get it, they're like, oh, my gosh, I wish I had had this sooner. And trust me, like, I can't help but think that parts of my life might have gone a little bit easier had I had this. But that being said, I'm a strong believer of when the student is ready, the teacher, and the tools appear. And the fact is, is, had this been introduced to me earlier, first of all, I probably would have been like, that's stupid. Or I would have used it to manipulate. Right. I was like, oh, if I just know what these people are, then I can speak in a way to get them to do what I want. Right. So I. I do believe that, like, if you're listening right now and this is speaking to you, it is a divine appointment and you are ready. And that goes with anything, not just me. And the enneagram here. Anytime we have awareness of something, especially something that is outside of our comfort zone, it means you're fully ready to start digging in a little bit. Even though it's scary and even though it might be uncomfortable, I. I do believe that for sure. Now, what we do with that and what you do with that. That's where free will comes in. So it's up to you from, from there on. But I mean, I love that.

Yeah, yeah, I. Yeah, me too. I am very encouraged and I think my listeners are also very encouraged from this. If people want to work with you, because I know that you work with clients one on one, how can they, how can they do that and how can they connect with you?

Well, the easiest way, especially when it comes to like figuring out if our type is correct. The assessment that I use has over 95% accuracy and I have customized blueprints. So once you take my assessment, you'll get your own customized blueprint. It's kind of like your sole handbook for the Enneagram. And all the components that I was talking about, like the framework that's attached to you, that's all part of it. So you never even have to talk to me if that's kind of the route you want to go. But if you do want to have that information and then also like, okay, you're the guide, show me what to do with this. You can reach out to me. I do one off sessions or I do, you know, kind of a three month little package too. You can just go to traceyomalley.com the work with me section. Or if you're on Instagram, you can find me at traceomalley. Or if you are really curious about this, I have my own podcast called Lead with the enneagram. There's almost 400 episodes. You can start diving in right there.

Amazing. That's awesome. I will definitely link that in the show notes and on my website so people can find you really easily. And I just want to thank you so much for coming on the podcast today. This was so insightful and I, I really just feel so encouraged by you and, and I just love listening to you. So thank you.

Thanks for having me on. I love the work you're doing here too.

Thanks for listening to another episode of Biohacking with Brittany. If you're interested in finding the show notes or the sponsors for this episode, you can do so on my website, which is biohackingbritney.com Remember to follow me on Instagram, where I'm most active. My handle is biohackingbritney. And if you're interested in working together and you want to email me directly, you can do that. My email is infoiohackingbritney.com and I look forward to hearing from you and having you tune in next week.