132. Why you don't have to settle any longer | Breakthrough

I'm Travia Steward. I want to help you move past barriers and obstacles that are preventing you from getting what you want in life. This is Breakthrough. Oh, my peeps, happy podcast Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday. I know you didn't click play to hear me sing, but I Yo, my peeps, I am incredibly excited for what I have created, for what I'm gonna share with you today, and the massive impact that I believe it can have in so many lives. So let's just dive right in. You see, I am an optimist. I am someone who sees the glass half full. I'm also someone who looked herself in the mirror one day and said, is this as good as it gets? And then set forth on a path of going, no, this isn't as good as it gets. And if I were to continue down that same path, I would have regrets at the end of life. So the thing that I want to talk about today is we all have a vision of who we want to be in this world, who we want to be in this life. We want to be more successful, we want to be more confident, we want to have better relationships, we want to be more fulfilled. So that when we wake up, you know, we're excited for our days. And when we put our heads on the pillow, it's like you can't help but smile because of how good your life is and how good the day was. I believe that so many of us are settling in our lives for— not that anything is wrong with just being a mother, just being a wife, just being a husband or a father, But I believe those things are extra. I believe the life that you dreamt of as a kid, as a young adult, is still possible for so many of us. But for a lot of us, we've given up on those dreams because we've stopped challenging ourselves. And so I know that you're listening to this podcast episode and you have a vision of what you want your life to be, of who you want to be, of how you want to show up. But how do we achieve that? The quick answer is to change our— to change your identity. You see, our identity is the way that we see ourselves. It's a story that we tell ourselves about who we are, what we're capable of, and it's a story that determines our actions and our results. And if you want to change the results you have in your life, we have to change the stories we tell ourselves. We have to change the stories that we make things mean in life. We have to ultimately become the person that our goals require us to be. So let's break down to— so I'm a reinvention coach, and if we go down to the word reinvent, that means to change something so much that it appears to be entirely new. It means to take up a different job or a way of life. And so in this process, we are setting a conscious goal to become the best version of ourselves no matter what it takes. And again, I believe the fastest way to change something in your life and the most effective way is to change your identity. You see, because this is the most powerful thing I've ever done in my life, and I use it in my, in my personal life. I use it in my coaching because it really gets to the core of who you are and those changes that you need to make, and then we shift from there. You see, this isn't about, you know, just changing your actions and your beliefs. This is about shifting who you are so that you become the person your goals require you to be. Now, there is something that you desire in life, but today your identity— who you are, how you see yourself— won't let you have it. And so today on this episode, I'm sharing part 1 of aligning your identity with what you want— your future self— instead of who you've been in the past, instead of the, the experiences that you've had and, and that, that sort of make you conclude what you're capable of. You see, right now it's about becoming the next level version of you, the person who no longer wants to settle in this life. It's about raising your standards to attract different things into your life, things that you actually want. Because your identity determines so many things about your life, and because how you see yourself is, is a direct result of what we draw into our lives. We cannot run it, we cannot perform it, but you know what? We can change it. Because one of the things I learned from Tony Robbins is human beings absolutely follow through on who they believe they are at their core, and then they act consistent with how they see themselves. Because the strongest force within the human personality is to stay consistent with, you know, I'm not meant to be fast, I'm not meant to be strong, I'm not meant to do this and that, right? I'm not meant to be rich. We want to stay consistent with how we define ourselves. And once we lock in on that identity at some part in our life, your brain finds a way to keep you there. So your identity determines all sorts of things, from the type of relationships you have, like what you think you deserve, what you're willing to put up with, what you, what you settle for. It determines your health. It determines how much money you make. It determines your career and the type of career you have, how much success you have in that career.. It determines your overall happiness. It really sets the bar for everything in your whole life. And to change this, you see, most people try to take different actions and they take, you know, external actions without changing who they are at the core, and that just doesn't stick. But you know what? At any moment, you can make the decision to change this, to shift your identity, to reinvent you. You don't have to stay tired, burned out, stressed out, overwhelmed. You don't have to settle for a marriage that you're trying to, to make work for the kids. You don't have to stay in a marriage that this is what I've always wanted because I only wanted to get married one time, and I wanted the guy I married, the father of my kids, to be the one that, you know, we go through this life until the end. But if you're not happy, you don't have to stay there. You don't have to settle. You don't have to settle for living paycheck to paycheck. You don't have to settle for getting up on a Monday morning and not being excited about a job because you are going to a job that you hate. And so when we want something different, we have to change this core identity, how we see ourselves. Because if you want wealth in your life, you have to stop seeing yourself as poor. If you want to be fit, you You have to stop seeing yourself as overweight or big-boned. And you see, when people change something like losing weight, you know, winning the lottery, without changing our core identity, most people return back to that original place because they haven't created the beliefs, the stories, the, the paradigm shifts that will sustain those changes. Because you can't get new results without changing those fundamental principles, those fundamental parts of the equation. So overall, we have to see ourselves differently. We have to see ourselves as we want to be in the future, the future version of who we want to be, and then we be it now from that identity level. It is acting as if today. And when you know what you want, then you create the person who can have that. So I want you to ask yourself right now, you know, you may be at— you may be driving, you may be working out, you may be prepping dinner for the kids, you may be, you know, on a long road trip, but ask yourself, who are you? And the truth for most of us is I am who I think my friends, my family all the people closest to me, I am who I think they think I am. Because we become who other people want and expect us to be unless we create on purpose who we want to be and how we want to show up. So you have to get really clear on that 2.0 version of you, because people only change when their desire to change becomes greater than their desire to stay the same. And a lot of people, we stay the same for most of our lives. You see, for me, I didn't start seeing success in my business until I started seeing myself as a CEO and knowing that if this was going to happen, I had to shift my self-image. I had to shift my identity to become that CEO who could grow a life coaching business. I had to stop hiding. I had to really reach in and embrace who I was at my core and really become my authentic self, in addition to becoming the CEO of a growing life coaching business. Because lasting change doesn't happen until you shift your identity. And you see, no one teaches us this growing up. No one teaches this to teaches us this in school. You know, we don't learn this in, you know, chemistry and, you know, psychology. We don't learn this. No one teaches us to become a new version of ourselves growing up. But you know what the great news is? That we can change our life, we can change our identity anytime we want, as much as we want. So I want to ask you, when was the last time you challenged yourself? Do you remember when you had dreams and, you know, you were ambitious? Where did that person go? You see, because past the age of 30, we began to stick to things that keep us safe, things that we know we're going to succeed at, things we know we can do. And we stop challenging ourselves, and we don't challenge our identity anymore. We don't do hardly anything new unless we know we're going to succeed at it. And I know I have been so guilty of that. And see, by doing this, we keep ourselves safe. And if we were to step outside of that identity, we can now get access to other parts of who we are and who we were created to be. And we want to be able to access this because some of us have closed the door. We've forgotten what we wanted as kids. We've forgotten those ambitions that we had. We've forgotten a level of success that we dreamed about having. You know, I talked a couple podcast episodes ago is, have you stopped dreaming? Have your dreams vanished? And so much of, of the work that I do is because I listen to people in my daily life settle in so many different ways. I listened to my mother 6 months before she died at the age of 85 settle in her life. Her whole life was about settling, and at the end of life she had an enormous amount of regret. And so if you want to change your life, you have to change your beliefs. If you're not creating what you want in your life, you have to take a look at what you're believing and saying to yourself and the stories that are creating those results. And we're just touching the tip of the iceberg today, but I want to introduce you to my newest evolution, my newest work that I've been pouring and pouring and pouring my heart and soul and blood and sweat and tears into. It's called Limitless. This is my program that is one-to-one for 5 months. And limitless. It's possible for you to create that next level you, that version of you who can create, who can actually create the results you want in life. And you see, we do this by first unlocking and breaking through those beliefs, those blocks, and that thinking that's been holding you back. Then it's a process of unlearning and replacing a foundation that will unleash a more powerful version of you. We're going to lay a whole new slab, a whole new foundation. So how do you become the best version of you? How do you become the person your goals require? That's what my new program Limitless is all about. It's not a one-size-fits-all kind of program. It's individually tailored to you and the results that you want to create in your life. Inside Limitless, we work together one-to-one for 5 months, and I've streamlined all of the work that I've done with my clients over the last 3 years to help you get faster results. This program is mainly for women who want more. Now, I do work with a couple of men, but this program is mainly for women who want more, and it's for you if you are settling in your life and relationships. It's for you if you want to stop going through the motions on autopilot. It's for you if you're tired and you're ready to have more energy to create the life you want. It's for you if you're ready to create the best version of yourself. It's for you if you're ready for better relationships with yourself and for others. So as you listen to this episode, what are the options right now? Well, I believe you have 5 options. I believe you can do nothing and you can stay in the same place you are right now. You can also try to figure this out yourself. Which of course will take much longer. You can work with another coach, there's no harm in that. You can listen to more of these podcast episodes, you know, and, and so that gives you, you know, what you should be doing, but really not the how. You can read a bunch of books, and a lot of those books are like getting on the treadmill at the gym. They're not targeted and tailored for you. It's like a catch-all for the average person. You know, and so it's like, in this program, the strategies and the tools that you will learn in Limitless will be things that you can take away and use for the rest of your life. This is 5 months of bi-weekly calls, 60-minute calls with me, and WhatsApp or Voxer support between calls. So I can help you between calls as well. My promise to you in Limitless is that I will help you reinvent yourself so you can create the results that you want in your life and your relationships. My promise to you is to help you become the version of yourself that creates the life that you want, that you become more confident, you become more decisive, you learn how to set healthy boundaries, you create your 2.0 next level self, that you're able to manage your mind and So much more. And what's special about this time right now? This is a new program. So I am offering a founding members price for only $1,500. Guys, that is such a steal. And that's just for the first 10 people. And that means it's a founding members price and it will never be this cheap again because right now I wanna make sure that it works. And I'm going to get feedback from those first 10 people to make it better and better and better and better. And so it'll never be $1,500 again. The price will probably double or triple, to be perfectly honest. The doors for Limitless will open on August 1st this year, 2023, and I'm so excited about this program, and I can't wait to welcome you as the newest member in Limitless. So if you have any questions, I want you to not hesitate. I want you to email me at travia@traviasteward.com, and I will answer them on next week's or the following week's podcast episode. If you already know that this program is for you, if you already know that you want to jump in, I am leaving a link for the waitlist. Make sure you click on that link, get in line on the waitlist, and it really is going to be a first come, first serve. And then what's gonna happen is we'll jump on a call because I wanna make sure that you are a fit for this program. And honestly, that you have decided that this is not as good as it gets, that you are ready to create your more in this life, that what you are doing every day is not as good as it gets, that you're tired of watching your, your life go by You're tired of sitting in the audience, you're tired of sitting on the sidelines. And again, doors for Limitless will open on August 1st for the first 10 people at a founding members price for $1,500 for 5 months of bi-weekly calls. So my peeps, I am so excited about Limitless. I am so excited. This is why I quit my teaching job. This is why I get up every single day to see how can I help, how can I serve today, because I want to create an impact. I want to help you create the best version of you, raising your standards, creating things that you, you once dreamt were possible but that you put on the back burner and you forgot about. I want to help you create your 2.0, that next level version of you. So if you have any questions Shoot me an email. If you know you're ready for this, click on the waitlist button below this in the descriptions, and let's go.