Ep 81 YOU have ALL the power

You are listening to solo episode number 81. I'm Travia Steward, and I want to help you move past barriers and obstacles that are preventing you from getting what you want in life. This is Breakthrough. Today on the podcast, I want to talk to you about an event, actually an experience that I attended a few days ago, this past Sunday. It was called The Ultimate Experience. Now, I'm someone who absolutely loves personal development events. And, you know, I always find that when I go, I grow in so many different ways. But I don't think there's ever been a time where I have left that venue thinking that the experience that I just journey through was life-changing. Now, I don't mean life-changing in a, like, a rah-rah, you know, kind of way. I mean life-changing in a way that I was motivated to take a deeper look inside of who I am in a way that I'd never done before. And I examined how I was showing up, the value that I was adding to the world, to my life, to the people in my life. And that's what I mean when I say life-changing, because this event, by the end of it, I felt like I was a different person and I wanted different things. I recognized that I was changing some things that were deep inside of me. And if I had to wrap it up all in a nice little bow and put it into a quote, it would be, "Be the change that you want to see in the world, but by changing how you listen and see things." I got that from Steve Hardison yesterday. Today, as I shared with you, I'm going to share 3 main points with you. I'm going to share our perception of the world, and how all the power is in the listener. I'm going to share with you how I have fallen into the trap of doing what everyone else is doing and doing what I feel like is expected of me to do. And then I'm going to round it out, this very short episode, with knowing who I am. Let's get right into it. So the event that I attended was based on a book that was recently released. Into publication at the beginning of December of 2021 called The Ultimate Coach. And it's a book about a way of being. And what that means is how we are showing up in the world and how we can be different. So my biggest takeaway from attending the event was, I mean, I learned so much from all the powerful people who were in that room. And it was so profound to sit there and be in the world of possibility. Like, I'm someone who lives in the world of possibility, but to be surrounded by millionaires and billionaires and people who don't see restrictions on their life, they see, how can I make that thing happen today? And so being in a room where people who perceive their world differently helped to shape me and motivate me and shift me into how I view my world. And so one of the things that Steve Hardison said, he led with, that all power is in the listener. And when I work with my clients, we always dive into how is it that you are perceiving, how are you reacting to the things that, that take your thermostat up to high or down to low, the things that trigger you, the things that piss you off. How is it that you react to that? And so one thing that I have always been an advocate for is not allowing other people to take your thermostat, you know, not allowing other people to control how you feel throughout certain situations. And the difference that I learned yesterday was If we can begin to change how we see that experience to begin with, how we can hear that person differently, how we can acknowledge that person differently, that could make all the difference in the world. And something that I realized in myself was I'm a pretty positive person. I am as silly as they come. I love to laugh. I love to learn. But I also have some jealousy in me. I have some envy. I have judgments that, as I sit here and unzip my whole soul for you, but I have things that I think that I'm not proud of in admitting that, of being envious of someone else's success, envious of how someone else is making the difference that I want do you want to make? Sitting in that room, I realized that I wanted to— I wanted to keep up with the next person. I wanted to do exactly what the next person was doing, right? And so if the coaches were on social media saying this and saying that, then I wanted to say something in my own way as well. And I just recognized that there were so many times that I was holding myself back because I was trying to be what other people wanted me to be. I was trying to be what I thought a coach should be, a teacher should be, a director should be, instead of falling into who I am, right? And so getting out of Where did those judgments come from? Where did the thief of comparison come from? So I was digging deep and figuring out, how did I become the person that I am today, right? Because we all were put on this earth. We were created to be these people who lived in a possibility, who could experience and have profound experiences in life and live through Abraham Maslow's pyramid. The highest place of fulfillment. And how do we get there? Well, we don't get there by being jealous or envious of other people, and we don't get there by feeling and experiencing judgments about other people. And I recognize that that's something that I immediately wanted and needed to change. And I also wanted and needed to change that I didn't need to keep up. I don't need to keep up with everybody else. I do things as I do them. Why? Because Comparing myself to other people is the thief of joy that I want to feel as I build my business. Another part of the journey was figuring out, well, how do I want to show up? Who is it that I want to be? You know, I spoke about this in an episode ago, you know, who I want to be. And I've been exploring that. And I remember when I was first doing some of my coach training, And the coaches that I learned from were always like, you cannot want it more for the client than they want it more for themselves— than they want it for themselves. And I understand that, but I recently, a couple weeks ago, I, I, a new client signed on to work with me, and I always like to know what what motivated them, what was that deciding factor that they pulled the trigger, you know, because there are millions of coaches in the world and I wanted to know what was the thing that made them say yes to me. And I was so touched by something a client said to me. She said, I felt like if I was down in the trench, that you would go down there with me. And she was 100% right. I am that type of coach who will go down with you. And there was a time when I was holding back on that because, again, I was trying to do what a coach should do. But who I am and knowing who I am, that is one of my absolute best strengths. And who I'm creating myself to be in 2022 is, is someone that I want to be proud of, as always, right? And so that experience helped me to dig deeper into who I was being and how I was showing up in the world, but not on a surface level, but a much, much deeper level. What is the effect that I want to have on other people? And what is the effect that I'm having on them today? And how is it that I'm showing up? Am I showing up based on those expectations? Yeah, I was. I've been doing a lot of thinking and, and based on what is this next version of me, right? I soaked up so much information in that room yesterday. I soaked up It was like there was endorphins just floating around in the room yesterday of possibility, of you can be whatever you want to be, all the things, right? All the ways that envy doesn't have to exist in my thoughts, jealousy doesn't have to exist in my thoughts. And so challenging myself to become actually who I really want to be and how I want to show up. I want to be the person who acknowledges people before I acknowledge myself. Right? I want to be the person that people come to where they feel like, you know what, Travia will hear me. She will listen like I've never been listened to before. And I want to be that, that, that, that presence for you in the land of possibility, right? And so as I wrap up how profound this experience was for me, what does this have to do with you? What does this have to do with you and how you're showing up? So my challenge to you today is If you could take a look at your life, almost stepping out of and having an out-of-body experience, are you loving your life? Are you content with your life? Or are you constantly trying to level up? What is next level for you, right? Creating more experiences that help you to feel the way you want to feel every day, help you feeling those emotions and those feelings. There is so much potential in each one of us. And if we just allow ourselves to dream, to feel the possibility, and knowing that we were put on this earth, created to be more than what we are today. And it doesn't matter what level you are at right now. We all were created to be more than we are today because we always want to continue growing and expanding. And something that I realized that I am evolving into— there was a point in time where I was, you know, I felt like I was a good coach. I feel like— I know that I'm a good coach. But I was still comparing myself to other coaches that I worked on— that I'd worked with, right? And so in my evolution, the person that I came out of that experience to step boldly into is that I'm an ultimate coach for me, for my people, for the people who are already destined to work with me, for the people who are called, for the people who resonate with me. I am your ultimate coach. I believe in the power of coaching, the power of transformation, the power of breaking through those glass ceilings so much. And then I also believe that I am the ultimate partner, that in my marriage, in my relationship, I am the ultimate partner. So that she wants for nothing, right? So that she experiences all the things that she wants to experience without having to go outside and want it from someone else, right? Acknowledgement. And then third, an ultimate being. And what that means to me is being that example of what's possible, but being and leading with— and I'm not talking about material things. I mean seeing other people through the lens of love first, seeing the good in people, not judging a book by its cover. And so if I declare those things right now, If I declare that I am an ultimate being who really wants to change the world, then I'm figuring out how can I start with my world and my life and the people that I interact with. How can I make a difference on that level? Some of you may know that my word for 2022 is create. Because I want to create everything that I came here to create and do, right? And I want to create each moment just as I want my clients to create, as if we have a magic wand. I want to create the life, and I am creating the life that I came here to live. So now I, I want to ask you, are you creating the life that you came here to live? Are you creating your more? Those of you who listened to the podcast last week, I had my sister-in-law Leola on, and I tell you what, I am inspired by her, by her transformation, by her changes. By the way that she is stepping in to get that next level, right? She shared on the podcast that she's in her 60s now. But you know what? She shared a video with me where she had a barbell with weights on it, and she was doing some chest press, you know, clean press. You know, she was overhead pressing. And to think that I would ever see her lifting weights like that, I never would have said yes to that. But I was so inspired by her reaching and stepping outside of her comfort zone to do something that she doesn't normally do. So I'm asking you, so what is it that you're stepping out of your comfort zone to do that you don't normally do? How can you— I'm not asking you to totally leave your comfort zone, but how can you just Expand it to the land of possibility, to maybe put yourself in a room with people you don't normally put yourself in a room with. Maybe reach out to someone that you normally would have judged to begin with and walk by. Who is it that you want to be in this world? And what are the changes? What is your next level? What is the goals that you have for yourself and how you want to show up and your contribution to making this world a place that we all want to live in where we love each other? I leave you with this: in making a difference in this world, in expanding the realm of possibility, in expanding out of your comfort zone, How can your expansion become someone else's inspiration? Okay, that's what I have for you today. Take care, my people. Be exceptional and know that this is coming from an absolute place of love because I want to be the best version of myself and I want to motivate, encourage you all to seek that higher, that best version of who you are today. Take care.