Vanessa Van EdwardsScience of People, Science Of People · Behavioral Researcher, Founder, Author, Harvard Instructor

Closeness Is a Sign of Interest!

18 Apr 2026 · 1 min

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In this segment, Vanessa Van Edwards explains how the concept of proxemics— the study of personal space— can reveal attraction. She describes that when we like something or someone, we instinctively move closer, so behaviors like leaning in, reaching out, or entering another's intimate zone (approximately 18 inches from the body) act as micro‑messages of interest. While these cues don’t guarantee romantic attraction, they indicate a positive, favorable response. Vanessa advises viewers to watch how often someone breaches this intimate distance as a practical way to gauge interest.

Chapters

How do I know if someone is attracted to me? The very first thing is something called proxemics. So proxemics is the fancy schmancy body language word for space between people. What happens is when we like something or someone, whether that's a delicious cake or a handsome man or a beautiful woman, is we want to move towards that thing, that item that we like. So whenever you have someone who's leaning in towards you, who's reaching out towards you, who wants to stand closer to you or be in your closer physical distance or your intimacy zone, you know that someone at least likes you. And this is a micro message of like. You don't necessarily know attraction, but you know that there's something positive happening there. So pay attention to the space around you and count how many times they come into your intimate zone. That's about 18 inches away from your body.