Vanessa Van Edwards shares neuroscience research from Dr. Matthew Lieberman showing that naming your fears actually reduces amygdala activation. Instead of avoiding scary thoughts, ask someone to list their worries, repeat their words back verbatim, and validate them. This simple technique creates emotional distance and helps the brain register the fear as handled.
to the research is very clear on this. So Dr. Matthew Lieberman at UCLA has studied how do we notice fear and get rid of it, right? Noticing is one thing, getting rid of it is the other. And what he found is that when he puts people in an MRI, scans their brain, either feel afraid or flashes them fear, their amygdala begins to light up and it will stay lit up. The moment they say or think fear or anxiety, the amygdala stops activating. Our instinct is to not talk about the bad things, right? Like, that is our instinct, is like, don't talk about the bad scary things because then they won't feel it. They are feeling You are much better off starting off with all those limiting beliefs and fears. Once we feel heard with fear and anxiety, it almost allows our brain to go, "Ah, noted." Like, that actually creates a weird emotional distance. Tell me all the things you're worried about. Tell me all the hangups. Tell me what your biggest fears are here. Let me address them. But don't address them yet. Repeat back. Use their words. The more you're doing that, you'll notice there's a moment when you do this with someone where they're like, Yeah, let them have that moment, and then when you see that, yeah, that's it, that's why I'm here.
