Vanessa Van EdwardsScience of People, Science Of People · Behavioral Researcher, Founder, Author, Harvard Instructor

I once learned a single question from Katie Couric that completely changed the way I have conversati

12 Aug 2026 · 1 min

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In this short YouTube clip, Vanessa Van Edwards explains a conversational technique she learned from journalist Katie Couric: replace the common question "What do you do?" with "What do you like to do?". She argues that this subtle wording shift moves the dialogue from factual answers toward stories about a person's passions, quirks, and hidden gems, making conversations more engaging. Vanessa frames facts as dead ends and stories as doorways, urging viewers to upgrade their questions. She concludes by promoting her book, Conversation: How to Connect with Anyone and Make Every Interaction Count, which expands on these ideas and is available in print and audiobook formats.

Chapters

Here's how to talk to anyone easily. I learned this from one award-winning journalist, Katie Couric. She never asks, what do you do? She only asks, what do you like to do? That one subtle word change steers the conversation toward joy. It opens the door to someone's passions, quirks, and hidden gems. A fact is a dead end. A story is a doorway. Upgrade your questions. Learn exactly what to say in my new book, Conversation: How to Connect with Anyone and Make Every Interaction Count. It's available wherever books are sold, and I even read the audiobook.