Vanessa Van Edwards says asking "How long have you lived here?" kills conversation because it gets one-word answers. Ask "What's your story?" instead. People who ask more follow-up questions have higher-quality, more memorable conversations, according to a 2017 study.
One of the big mistakes we make in conversation is we ask questions with one-word answers. How long have you lived here? How many kids do you have? Those one-word answer questions create traps for yourself. So instead, I want you to ask questions that get to longer answers, but also make them answer in a way that tells some kind of a story or lets them go a little bit deeper with you. Instead of, where are you from? Ask, what's your story? Instead of, how's it going? Or what's up? Ask, "What do you got planned this weekend?" The key here are how and why questions, not when and what questions. And research proves this works. In 2017, a group of associates found that people who ask more questions, specifically follow-up questions, have way better conversations and are more memorable.
