Vanessa Van Edwards says the biggest attraction killer is undersignaling warmth. No amount of physical polish beats a cold demeanor. Real attraction needs clear signals: asking questions, showing genuine interest, and expressing desire to connect.
When I think about attraction, we did the 3 like push-pull, use a yummy scent, and flushed and blushed. Great. But the last one is signaling. We cannot be attracted to someone who is unavailable. Like, we can like them from afar, but we don't feel it's seductive if someone is like beautiful but cold. You can have the most yummy scent and the most beautiful red lips, but if you are cold and undersignaling warmth, there's no attraction or seduction that's going to happen. So the most important thing with all of this is that you are signaling openness. Availability, warmth, that you are signaling, I want to be turned on, I want to bond, I want to connect, I want you to ask me questions, I want to ask you questions. So clarity of signal is really, really important here, and it shouldn't be overlooked. So I'm just always careful when I give makeup tips. I'm like, yes, I want you to look that way, but what's way more attractive is no makeup at all and you being like, I want to know you, right? Feeling good about it. I want to know you, I'm open to you, I'm attracted to you, I'm into you. Even if you show up with no makeup but you're into him, that's super attractive.
