Vanessa Van Edwards describes polite flirters who seem cold and stiff, leaning back like they're in a job interview. They're actually running through a mental checklist to assess compatibility. Their formal demeanor means they take the interaction seriously and don't want to lead you on.
Polite flirters. They are almost cold. This is a style which. It's almost as if polite people are approaching flirting, like a job interview. They even found that they would lean back, like, cold, distant, which is the opposite of an attraction cue. Right. Like, I always encourage, like, lean in, have a little body. No, they would often, like, lean back. And they were still flirting. Very confusing. But they're almost approaching it. Like, let me assess you. They're actually taking it very seriously. It's so important they're making the right decision that it feels formal, because for them, it is quite serious. They really want to make the right choice. They're not going to lead you on. So in a weird way, I almost think it's a gift if that's happening. So if you're on a date and you're like, they're so stiff and they're, like, running through a checklist in their head, it's not a bad thing. It could be that they're really trying to make the right choice for you both.
