Vanessa Van Edwards shares four research-backed ways to build trust fast: ask for someone's opinion to show respect, share something vulnerable once rapport starts, mirror their speech or body language, and put your phone away. A study links deeper conversations to greater happiness.
How you can get someone to trust you and also feel rapport with you extremely fast. First, ask for an opinion. Research has found is that when we ask someone for their opinion, it puts them in the knowledgeable position. It shows respect and also pays a compliment. Second, be safely vulnerable. This is only reserved for people who you already feel a little bit of rapport with, but you want to go the extra mile. There was a study that was actually called Less Small Talk Equals Happy People, and they found that the more deep conversation we have, the happier we feel. Third, mirror. Another study found that mirroring or subtle mimicry actually helps people feel more rapport. In this way, subtly mirroring shows, "I respect you so much. I want to be in tune with you so much that I'm literally going to honor the way you speak." Lastly, be present. When you're with someone, don't multitask. Don't be on your phone. Don't have an earbud in. People are much more encouraged to open up when they feel that you are fully present with them.
