Vanessa Van Edwards explains why faking it backfires: authenticity requires alignment between what you intend, what you do, and what you say. When corporate professionals lower their voice or pretend to be a friend to gain respect, the fakeness betrays their original intention and breaks genuine connection.
Intention matches action. What you want matches what you're doing and matches what you're saying and matching with what you're asking. I think it's inauthentic if someone's like, I'm going to get this business from them, but I'm going to act like they're my friend. Intention does not match action. You wanted to add value. Your business card trick is— I would call that wanting to add value to this person so much so they want to connect more. I love that approach to interaction. Your intention was matching what you were trying to do. I think what happens a lot of the time is people very well-meaning— this all the time in corporate— someone's intention is to be respected, is to not be underestimated. Is to be taken seriously. That's a lot of folks who come to me feel like they've been underestimated, overlooked, and interrupted. So their intention is good, and then they try to learn these tricks to be taken seriously. And so they lower their voice like Elizabeth Holmes, and then they act like they're faking it till they make it. I think that if your action feels fake and manipulative, it's going to come across and it's not going to match your intention. That's where people get into trouble.
