Jack Neel explains how context shapes what people assume about you. Meeting someone on the subway versus at a bar triggers different impressions. He describes how his YouTube persona makes people expect him warmer in person than he naturally is, so he has to deliberately turn it up.
Our first impression was really unique. Do you know why it was really unique? Context of first impressions also matters. Like, think about meeting the same person in a subway versus meeting someone in a waiting room versus meeting someone in a bar. It's one of the reasons why we like to have safe places like happy hours, bars. That's why so many connections are made at networking events. It's because it's safe, like there's nothing to distract us. I mean, a hype gal, a hype guy— there's a reason why we love a hype gal or hype guys. You should know what people are assuming about you. I knew you'd be assuming that about me. Everyone assumes that about me because of what I do. I was with a friend and she was like— we didn't know each other very well, we were talking, and she goes, you're so much warmer in conversation than I would have imagined. I was like, yeah, because you're watching me on YouTube. It's not a real conversation. I have to fight the assumption of like, I'm reading your body language, I'm reading every cue that you're doing. That's actually not me most of the time. And so I have to dial up my warmth and my first impression more than anyone else.
