Vishen Lakhiani breaks narcissism into a simple sequence: start with compassion for others, then gratitude for what you love about yourself, then forgiveness. Narcissism is self-love without love for others. This three-step practice builds healthy self-love instead.
The world doesn't tell us to love ourselves. Since we are kids, our education system, the people around us point out our flaws.
The two ends of the spectrum are narcissism of like, you know, like letting go of all mistakes. And then the other thing like you're saying is self sabotage and beating yourself up forever. And you have these two polar opposites. And I think people get so scared that they're doing one or the other that they kind of avoid it. What is the process to get to the forgiveness you're talking about? Where you can allow yourself to move on?
So, so narcissism is self love without love for others. That's why we start with compassion. When you start with compassion, you are training your love for others. When we come to gratitude and forgiveness, you're actually training your love for yourself. In the gratitude phase, you don't just express gratitude for three things in your work or three things in your personal life. You express gratitude for what you love about yourself. And that's because why shouldn't we? The world doesn't tell us to love ourselves. Since we are kids, our education system, the people around us point out our flaws. Most people don't have a problem with self love. They have a problem with self pity, self loathing, with not enough self love. Now when you come to the forgiveness stage, you further amplify your love for yourself. But remember, you're doing these phases after you express love for everyone else. Compassion first, then gratitude and forgiveness. And this is how you avoid narcissistic tendencies.
