RIDICULOUS TikTok Hot Takes | Wedding Planner REACTS

Well, hello, lovely humans, and welcome to Engage, a wedding planning podcast for the modern day couple. I'm your host, Jamie Wolfer, and I truly believe that wedding planning does not need to be complicated or time consuming. I kind of picture these episodes like jumping on a quick phone call with your wedding planner. You get your answers and you go on your merry way. Because sometimes not all of us have an hour to dedicate to listening to super long podcasts or super long intros. So without further ado, let's just jump right on into it.

Today's episode is actually a audio recording of one of my most popular YouTube videos. I don't know about you, but sometimes.

I just need to sit down and.

Be able to process through the audio without the distraction of a video.

So we decided to take this sweet.

Little nugget and turn it into a podcast for you. I hope you find this helpful, my friends.

Hello, lovely humans. Welcome back to my channel. If you're new here, my name is Jamie Wolfer. I'm your online wedding planner. And in today's video, we're going to be doing some TikTok hot takes. But before we launch into the video, jump on down there and hit subscribe, because at least once a month, we're pumping out these TikTok reaction videos that y' all seem to be going feral for. I don't understand, but I'm not mad about it. I'm not mad about it. Get on down there, hit that subscribe button, and let's see what the team sent me. Ready, set, go.

So I'm gonna let y' all in on a little wedding secret real quick. So this is one of the things that we recently added to our budget that I feel like a lot of brides forget when it comes to map out your wedding budget. So one of the things that we recently added was a paramedic on standby.

A what? I'm sorry, where is your event taking place? Coachella. I mean, there's another 30 seconds of this video, so I'm assuming there's gonna be more to this, but you should not need a paramedic at your wedding. Just as a standard, I'm finna take everybody breath away. Listen, this is 2025 bridal energy, okay? And if it's not it, I don't. I don't want it.

I'm gonna look so freaking good.

Yes, you are.

And then part two, on a more serious note, I'm also gonna make sure that everybody signs a liability waiver, because I'm not responsible for if you Fall and bump your head. Okay.

I love her. All right, Devanna, I love everything about your energy, but I do have to burst your bubble on this one teensy little thing, okay? It's super, super minor. Do not have your guests sign a waiver. Okay? You don't need to have them sign a liability waiver. You need something called event insurance, wedding insurance, or wedding event insurance, or some sort of amalgamation of those three words together. Event, wedding insurance. My personal favorite is Briteco. They're the only event insurance company that I've ever seen that covers things like the Rona, which means if you or someone else close to you gets it, you're covered in case you need to move your event. You know, like if the groom gets it and can't really be there for his big day, then you. You have that covered. With Rent Co and their lowest packages start at 120 bucks. They also have cancellation insurance, and one of the cancellation insurance options that they have is cancel for any reason. This is called limited liability insurance. This is full coverage for your entire event starting at like 120 bucks is not sponsored. I just love them so much. They have the most unique features out of every single insurance company I've ever dealt with. When it comes to events, I love them. They keep it super easy, super streamlined. So in a situation like this, don't make guys feel uncomfortable by having them sign a waiver. Just pay 120 bucks and then you'll be covered. And no one wants to think about, like, the drastically bad things happening or falling and bumping their heads. Like, no one wants to think about that. Right. But this is peace of mind coverage. So instead of having that awkward moment of making sure everyone's turning in their field trip slip, I mean, their liability waiver to join your event instead, just make sure you and your fiance are covered. Okay. And then it just kind of protects you and adds coverage in case someone gets a little knock in the nugget. But I'll tell you one thing right now, I need more Devonna in my life. Okay, next. This is three things I'm not doing at my wedding as a wedding photographer. Ooh. Okay. I do particularly enjoy vendor hot takes because I always feel like we see things that other people don't see. And so when we give hot takes, we oftentimes can add a little element of education when we do posts like this is why I do posts like this. Not only because they're super fun, but also ideally, educational.

Sitting here listening to a podcast is all fine. And Dandy right? But sometimes you need an actual person to be asking some of these questions to and you may be sitting there going, you know what, Jamie? Actually, yeah, that. That makes a lot of sense. I would love to be able to.

Ask you these questions.

Guess what? You need to join the master plan. You've heard me talk about it, but do you know why I love it so much? You get over 10 lessons that walk you through planning your wedding with videos and spreadsheets and other detailed resources along the way. Join me and my virtual clients over in the master plan and get all your wedding planning questions answered. Literally thousands of couples have gone on this journey with me and I'd love for you to be next. Check it out@wolferandco.com tmp that's wolferandco.com tmp.

Listen, wedding budgets suck. They're just like the actual worst. And the hardest part for me is that weddings are not cookie cutter. They're not one size fits all. And I think it's important to make sure that you're budgeting according to your priorities. Build a budget that works with your vision and you'll be on the path to planning a wedding that you really want. So if you want my recommendations for making your perfect budget for you and your partner, head on over to weddingpriorities.com.

Three things I am not doing at my wedding as a wedding photographer. So one, I will not be doing a bouquet toss or garter toss. I think just the idea of my future husband crawling up my dress to get a garter is just like the raunchiest thing. And so I just don't want to do that.

Okay, quick, quick, hot tip. Maybe, maybe don't say stuff like that on the Internet in case your clients past, present, and or future do a garter toss. I don't know if. You don't have to like it. Okay, you can go all raging in the comments down below whether you like it or not. But as just like a little business tip, don't call something raunchy, especially if your clients have done it in the past. Like, that's. That's a very strong word. You don't have to do it. And you're entitled to your opinion. You could totally share it on the Internet, but so can I. And that's what I'm doing. Here we are. Don't. Don't say a part of the event is raunchy. You just use a different word. It makes me uncomfortable. It's not quite our style. I would prefer not to. To me, it just Feels like I would rather have it at our event. Not one of the raunchiest things. Shame on all y'. All. My clients included that did this.

2. I'm requesting that my guests wear all black, so I'm getting, like, ghost chairs for the ceremony. So you're gonna be able to see through the chairs and see what guests are wearing. So I want all of my guests in all black. I just love the aesthetic of that and how, like, the bride and Grim are the only ones in white. It's just the contrast of. It looks amazing in photos.

No notes. Totally fine. Ghost chairs. I mean, I wouldn't pick that as the reason. I don't know if y' all know what ghost chairs are. They're the plastic ones. They became super in vogue, like, probably 10ish years ago. They're still really relatively expensive to rent, so you're not going to see them at a ton of events. So they haven't outlived their moment in the spotlight, even though they've been around for, like, a decade plus. So I still love them. I think they're great. They're not very comfortable, but they photograph Chef's kiss beautifully. But you're not gonna be able to see. That's. That's the logic of this is, like, you're not gonna be able to see what all of your guests are wearing simply because they're in ghost chairs. You're gonna see the backs of anyone who's at the back, but you're not gonna see anything really beyond that. What we're thinking is more like group photos, cocktail hour, reception. That's where a lot more of this is gonna come through. But just for the sake of having ghost chairs, making everyone wear black doesn't really connect as much for me. But she can use whatever excuse she wants. She can still ask her guests to wear black. I'm just explaining from that particular perspective, like, what if everyone wore black tops and white pants? You couldn't tell because they're in the ghost chairs. Right? So I guess it wouldn't matter as much. So it's maybe for reasons beyond just the ghost chairs. Also, are we wearing the same necklace? Are we the same person? No, we're both. We're both pretty basic. Because everyone has this. It's okay. It's so cute.

3. I'm not doing a plated dinner, like, a seated dinner at all. I think a seated dinner is, like, the biggest buzz kill. It kind of stops the party, and everybody's just, like, waiting around for the next events. So I Want my guests immediately after the ceremony. They're going to go directly to the reception and allowed to eat right away. They do not have to wait on their bridal party. I want them to eat, grab a few cocktails and kind of mix and mingle. Like I want people to chit chat with each other. I want people involved, I want people on the dance floor, things like that. So I want them eating and drinking as soon as they get there without waiting for us.

I don't think the dinner, like a seated dinner is a buzzkill. Like this is literally what we do for a living. I don't find that to be a buzzkill. I find it to be a great way to allow your guests to sit and enjoy a meal and like converse because they can still do that whether they're wandering around or dancing or whatever. Like they're not gonna be dancing at the table. Ideally not dancing at the table. But it does also follow the natural rhythm of the event overall where it's like yes, you have the ceremony, then you have a casual cocktail hour, then you have a dinner and then the energy ramps up. We haven't, we're not losing energy because we go through a sit down dinner. There is no real big buzz beforehand unless you have a raucous cock which isn't super common. In fact, most of the time it's relatively mellow. People are enjoying their conversations. It's still like quite mid energy. It's not high energy yet. So it's not like we're killing the buzz by incorporating a sit down dinner. I do. I am a little curious to hear more on her thoughts on this. And luckily we do have a follow up because I'm just kind of confused by they're just going to eat and start dancing. Like what that rhythm looks like overall. So let's take a look. See at this follow up reply. It says I love this. Could you elaborate on number three? Such a great idea. But I'd love to know your timeline of making sure the bridal party has time to eat too. Same Z because it sounded like we're new to a cocktail hour style reception. But also I'm not quite sure what we're doing. Like we are feeding them. I think we're just not sitting down. I think so. Clarify please.

Yes, because this is the one that I'm most worried about for my wedding. Just because I've never seen it done at somebody else's wedding before. So I'm just not sure the flow of things.

But.

But here's what I'm Thinking. I'm thinking since we want a cocktail style reception anyway and we're not doing a plated dinner, it'll basically flow from cocktail into the party. So our cocktail hour will be like two hours. So basically the bridal party will come in, we'll give people enough time to get through the buffet, and then bridal party will come in for the grand entrance. And then we're gonna go straight into some formalities just to get them out of the way and so we can enjoy ourselves and mix and mingle with everybody else. We're gonna come right in and do cake cutting. Then we're gonna do a margarita tower and then we'll do some speeches while everybody's eating and drinking and just enjoying themselves and kind of gathered around us. Then after that, like I said, those, I mean, those formalities will probably take 10, 20 minutes tops. So then you'll be right into the party with everybody else. And that'll give you at least like max, a full hour to eat, enjoy yourselves and grab some cocktails and mix and mingle with everybody else before the party partying starts.

A couple of notes on that. We're talking buffet. Buffet cocktail hour is going to be. It's going to have like a real almost like clunky feeling to it, in my opinion. Now you can have a place where food is served, but running people through like a buffet line, it's going to feel a little, I don't know, I don't love it. It could work, but I don't, I can't picture how this could work, but it could. My brain is just like short circuiting on a buffet for cocktail reception. Never seen it. Probably can come across quite flawless. I just, I don't know how secondary to that Margarita tower. Where's my invite? How do I get an invite? Also secondly, don't make me work it because I don't want to clean that up. Champagne towers, definitely sticky margarita towers. Might as well just pour glue all over the table. Just all over it. You know, just make sure it's permanently like a, like a dive bar. Constantly sticky to the touch table from here on out. So love the concept. Little concerned about the cleanup, but you won't be there, so that doesn't matter. That's on whoever allowed you to have a margarita tower. The biggest thing I take issue with this whole idea is that you'll come in grand entrance, do the cake cutting and everything, have the toast and that you think people will keep eating while you're doing this? They will not. Some people might sure. But most people are probably not gonna do that awkwardly in the middle of a sentence. I'm thirsty. Okay. Most people are gonna set their food down or stop eating while toasts are happening. As a sign of respect, they're not gonna keep scarfing their way through your toast. They're gonna stop. They're gonna make sure you know that they're paying full attention, which I think is the appropriate thing to do. So as long as we kind of adjust those expectations and make sure people have enough time to eat and then last and most importantly, make sure people know it's a cocktail style reception. So it's not going to be a plated meal that you're having. Totally fine. This can be a great cost savings idea. As long as you're really intentional on having really heavy hors d', oeuvres, really filling appetizers. And then you should be pretty good. If all you have is a Costco spread of veggies and fruits, then you're probably going to see your party dwindle a lot more quickly than you want it to. I recommend maybe not doing a buffet, but maybe doing stations with different kinds of things, especially if you can't afford to have them passed, which tends to get a little bit more expensive because then you are also paying for a server crew to walk those around. Okay, so at least we got a little bit more clarity. I was like, you're just not going to. You're just not going to do it. You're not going to feed people. Like, we're just not. You're doing cocktails, cocktail hour style. Okay, great. Okay, next video. This one says, pov, you got hitched in Vegas and didn't tell anyone until our wedding. A year later would it be you got hitched and didn't tell anyone until your wedding? I'm not here for grammatical checks. That's fine. Okay, I don't see a huge problem with this. But let's figure out, like, why I got sent this one.

Z and Eric have already been secretly married. They discreetly tied the knot in Vegas on February 23, 2024.

Her face.

Where they shared their first dance while waiting.

She's hyperventilating. This one bridesmaid is losing it.

Little Ross and Rachel moment in all of its glory with photos of mic snapshots of a 2004 Matthew McConaughey.

Do you see it? Oh, this is a huge no, no. This angers me so very much. I'm gonna give you a second to see if you see it. Freeze frame on the Screen. Do you see it? Because if you go back to the beginning, you know, like two seconds in. Look beautiful. Look how glorious this is. You know, you can see the flowers behind. I think it's a bar behind them. But the florals, the florals are serving. They're also probably sewing. Expensive. This floral install is expensive. Fast forward to 24 seconds in. We got a gaggle of dudes standing there, all black, not subtle at all. Looks like they are probably getting a champagne toast ready to go. We love that for them. Could we do it somewhere else? Anywhere else? We couldn't send one guy up discreetly to maybe get the champagne or you know, just start when the ceremony is over. We could just do that. I want to know who was running this event and who said, guess what? Servers. Go ahead, go ahead. They're in the middle of their ceremony and you know, filming it. But you would look great as a group collectively right there in all black. And they're just hanging out. They're just hanging out. May I don't actually, now that I'm back at the beginning of the video, I see some glasses already out. I don't know what they're doing. I don't know if they're doing a champagne toast or not. It does take a while to put those together. But this is very poor planning on somebody's behalf. Could be the venue, could be the catering staff, could be the wedding planner. For the love of all the tolly. Oh, we had an event before. Oh my gosh. This is like, I. One of these days I gotta do a story time on some of my early events because this is before I knew things and now I know things. We had this event out in 29 palms, which of course if you know, you know. But it was at this glorious like very mid century modern house. It was called like the Wagon Wheel House, something like that. Stunning property because it's far enough away from the, from the military base. And where they were having the ceremony was in the front yard. Absolutely gorgeous. Had this like wall behind them. So it was great. It was actually the fencing that they were using as the backdrop for their event. So they're coming in from out of the house, looping around and then there's a backdrop. Right here. Well, right here, right here. Sorry. If you're listening to a podcast version of this, I don't even know are we turning these in podcasts, whatever. I have two of those, by the way. We got one for wedding planners and then one for you guys to help you plan your weddings. It's called Engage with Jamie Wolfer. Find it anywhere where podcasts are played. Oh, and the other one is called the Union Podcast for Wedding Business Professionals, because I can't stop talking. So back to the story. We got the gate right here. Okay. And ceremony right here. The driveway coming out this way. Okay. Coming out this way. And so with this event, I guess we're kind of doing a mini story time here. Anyways, the bride had procured a local restaurant, a local restaurant to her in San Diego, Twin Ann Palms, also in Southern California, Although it's kind of like in the armpit of California, cuz. And they were supposed to be there a certain time to do all of their prep work on site. That time came, went, called them up and said, hey, where are you? What's going on? They're like, hey, we're still in San Diego. Don't worry about it. We will do all of our prep here. We just had some issues with timing of sourcing some of our stuff, so we're just going to prep here and, like, show up and be ready to go. And I was like, okay, bet. Sounds great. Another hour goes by. Still not here. Now we're two hours. Still not here. Three, four hours. The ceremony is starting. Ceremony is set to begin. They were supposed to show up there before I was even there. And that's why I was like, what's going on? I got called by the bride ahead of time. So as I'm driving out there, I'm calling them, trying to figure out what's going on. It's a mess. Ceremony starts. I get a phone call. Guess who's rumbling down the driveway? Mm. They finally made it. They finally made it. After being dishonest about their leaving time. Multiple times they made it. And they weren't just dishonest about that. They actually hadn't done any of their prep work either. I was, like, this close to sending some of the groomsmen to the local Ralph's to buy some steaks so we could start grilling stuff up. Dinner ended up being an hour and a half late on that one. But remember how I said the driveway was right here, and then there was the gate, and then there was the fence, and in front of which. And it was more like a wall, like a block wall kind of thing, that the couple was getting married so we could see them? We could see them. And they were really mad that I didn't open the doors to let them in so they could start bringing their equipment into the house because there was no way, again, this Large block wall was over here. So the only way to get into the house was through that gate and through that door, unless they went, I think, a long way around the back. And they didn't want to do that. They don't want because they were late. And so they wanted to make sure they was getting snappy with it. But so they got snappy with me because I wouldn't let them come through the gate while this ceremony's happening right there. I will. If there is one thing I will do, I will fiercely protect my couple's event experience whenever I need to. I will not be vicious about it, but I will be firm. Listen, you are four plus hours late. I understand that that makes things really uncomfortable. I understand that you are eager to get going, but I'm not going to interrupt my client's ceremony. So you and your gaggle of all black wearing companions are just shuffling right next to the ceremony space. You would have to walk by the ceremony. Yeah. Needless to say, I didn't recommend working with that caterer ever again. In fact, they're not caterers. They're a restaurant. And so this was a unique situation then, which I get. It's new, it's stressful, but at least be honest with me. Like, hey, this morning's been a mess. We're gonna be late. I'll be like, okay, bet. Let me know what I can do to support. You can say, hey, we've never done this before. I get it. That's totally fine. But don't keep lying about it. And then the sun set, and it was so dark that he was now getting mad at us for not having proper lights for him to be able to see to cook his food. Remember, this is a house. This is not like a normal venue. So we're running extension cords that we found in the house out to the cooking area where he was at, and bringing in lamps from inside to, like, light up his space because he didn't have any lamps or anything like that. This is also the wedding that this girl I need to do. Story time. This is basically turning into one. Anyways, this girl kept following me around. I was like, oh, your wedding, Clara, are you a wedding planner? Oh, I plan weddings. I plan weddings. Oh, you're doing that. You're doing that. Oh, interesting. Interesting. I plan weddings. I plan weddings. And I'm pretty sure that was her exact voice. I think. I think I got it. And then proceeded to get blackout drunk and fell into a cactus. And I was the only one with tweezers, so I'M over there pulling the spines out of her leg. She's like, you're doing such a good job. You're doing so good. You're such a good planner. And then passed out in one of the bedrooms at the Airbnb. Actually, actually, I think she passed out on a bench. And then someone moved her to the bedroom and that's where the couple was staying that night. And that's when the father of the bride came up to me and said, what are you gonna do about her? And I said, no, no. What are you gonna do about her? And then the event was over and I recruited some of the friends to, like, just, like, get her out. Okay, that's what we have for today's video. Guys, thank you so much for stopping by. If you want some more story times, I got more where that came from. So many, so many. It's mostly because it's before I knew things right, but occasionally it's, you know, just because of other people. If you haven't done so already, jump on down there, hit that, like, button and subscribe to this channel for more tips and tricks for the modern day bride. And until next week, bye, guys. If you are struggling with wedding planning and you have questions and you just need someone to listen and to chat with, come join us in the master plan community over@themasterplanwed.com I would love to have you in there. Thanks so much for listening. If you haven't done so already, subscribe, jump on over to wherever you're listening to this podcast and leave a five star review so we can let the podcast people know that Jamie knows what she's talking about sometimes. And until next time, bye, guys.