When Wedding Vendors Ghost, DJs Don’t Click, and DIY Takes Over | Wedding Q&A

Well, hello, lovely humans, and welcome to Engage, a wedding planning podcast for the modern-day couple. I'm your host, Jamie Wolfer, and I truly believe that wedding planning does not need to be complicated or time-consuming. I kind of picture these episodes like jumping on a quick phone call with your wedding planner. You get your answers and you go on your merry way, because sometimes not all of us have an hour to dedicate to listening to super long podcasts or super long intros. So without further ado, let's just jump right on into it. Today's episode is going to admittedly be a little bit all over the place. You see, every single month I sit down with all of the I was going to say constituents. They're not constituents. The people over in the Master Plan course and answer your questions in live time. So if you find yourself struggling and really need to sit down and speak with a real life wedding planner, I would love to be a part of your wedding planning journey. Join us over in the Master Plan today to get your questions answered. Until then, take a listen. All right. Maeve said, I settled on a photographer and booked him, signed contract and deposit. It was about 6 weeks ago. A couple weeks ago, I realized he never signed the contract or officially confirmed the booking was set. Oh, that's a bummer. We followed up with an email, but no response. I know this is his peak season, so he is probably incredibly busy, so I don't want to badger him. Should I follow up again? How would you handle this? I would follow up again. Well, it depends on how long it's been. Um, it could have been like a day since you said something. If it's been a day, you know, give it a minute. It also depends on where you're at, because June in a lot of places, as we saw in the comments at the beginning of this video, June is kind of falling out of style as the peak season for a lot of weddings. We're seeing a lot more spring and a lot more fall because it's cooler. So a lot more people can have events outside. Events outside in Texas in June, not that many, not that many, because it's, it's sticky outside. So that doesn't necessarily mean it could be his busy season. You know, I obviously don't know his books and I don't know what he has planned, but excuse me, I personally don't think that's a reason to ghost a client who's already signed. Um, I don't see a reason to ghost a client anyways. I think you're well within your rights to follow up again and say, hey, you probably have a lot going on. You're just so popular. I mean, obviously that's why we booked you. Um, I just noticed that, uh, that we haven't, um, received a countersign agreement. Would you mind sending that over just for our, our records? That would be great. Thank you so much. So then it's just like a, hey, just as a follow-up, this is just a perfunctory thing, you know, just checking something off the list. I'm not judging you. Your administrative skills. I am a little bit, I am a little bit, but I'm not going to tell you that. I'm just going to tell you for our records, we would like to have that copy back. Sitting here listening to a podcast is all fine and dandy, right? But sometimes you need an actual person to be asking some of these questions to. And you may be sitting there going, you know what, Jamie, actually, yeah, that, that makes a lot of sense. I would love to be able to ask you these questions. Guess what? You need to join the Master Plan. You've heard me talk about it, but do you know why I love it so much? You get over 10 lessons that walk you through planning your wedding with videos and spreadsheets and other detailed resources along the way. Join me and my virtual clients over in the master plan and get all your wedding planning questions answered. Literally thousands of couples have gone on this journey with me, and I'd love for you to be next. Check it out at wolferandco.com TMP. That's wolferandco.com TMP. Listen, wedding budgets suck. They're just like the actual worst. And the hardest part for me is that weddings are not cookie cutter. They're not one size fits all. And I think it's important to make sure that you're budgeting according to your priorities. Build a budget that works with your vision and you'll be on the path to planning a wedding that you really want. So if you want my recommendations for making your perfect budget for you and your partner, head on over to weddingpriorities.com. All right. We are really struggling to find a DJ that we are happy with. Is there a point at which we should settle for someone that doesn't check all of our boxes? The issue we're having is that a lot of DJs we're meeting seem to be really involved on the mic in a way we don't really want. I— oh my gosh, this is such a pet peeve of mine. Yes, obviously when I talk about earlier dismissing tables, like, I love a good DJ, but a good DJ knows when to be off the mic. Uh, we thought we finally found someone whose style we liked, but he has been giving a lot of vague answers to our questions, and I can't tell if we need to drill down on him a bit more or if we just aren't a match. I mean, there's— you got to go with your gut on this one. I obviously have not been a part of these conversations. I have not been there. But if you feel like, hey, we've tried really hard and we finally found someone who like might work, he might just suck at admin, you know? Or so I would say you could drill down. I would say if you feel like there's more conversation that you're willing to have and you've already worked so hard to find this one person to be a DJ for you, Try again. If you are still getting, you know, mixed messaging or vague messaging after you gave it another second and/or third attempt, however many you're comfortable with, then I'd say, yeah, it's time to keep hunting. And I would also recommend get into a Facebook group. You can join ours. It's national. It keeps growing, you guys. It's at the point where Facebook is literally like throwing people into this group. It's insane. It's like a, it's like a beast of its own. We love it. But you probably need a word of mouth suggestion. This is where I treat Facebook groups. As my wedding planning Google, I don't go on Google. I don't go on The Knot. I don't go on Zola because then you're looking like those are people who are paying to be there. Right. Instead, I want word of mouth. Like, I want a reference from someone who has dealt with this person. I want a venue to be like, here's a DJ we work with all the time. They're great. They're not on the microphone all the time. 'Cause then you could put together a post saying, um, I would put something along the lines of we're looking for a dynamic DJ who knows when to be on and knows when to be off the mic. Here's our budget. Here's our area. Does anyone know of anybody that fits this criteria? And then you'll get these answers served to you, which is beautiful. That would be my suggestion there. Brittany said, how can I cut costs on vendors as much as possible? I wanna DIY literally everything as much as possible. I'm open to being the crazy bride that hires an aspiring 19-year-old as her DJ. I am open to hiring a film photography student or 3. Basically, I'm the queen of finding ways to make things work without spending a ton of money. Welcome, friend. You're in great company. Um, and it's fun to me. I have amazing friends, sister, and people who want to help, and we have a tight budget. Our venue does not— our venue does require caterers, but my biggest question is, can we have a bunch of different foods, likely buffet style, that are unique to me and my fiancé? We've traveled around a lot during our relationship without breaking the bank. Anything we can cook ourselves, is that a terrible idea? Help! The HELP is in all caps, if that helps, but I just— I felt like I shouldn't yell into the microphone. So if your venue requires caterers, you are, you are quite limited. Because you just don't— if they have to be licensed caterer, you can only go with what they'll cook for you. So there is not— there's no DIY room for that really ever, especially because when they then use you that for a reason and they don't allow you to cook your own food for a reason, because there has to be some sort of protocol in place. I say this, our venue is like, they didn't care what we brought in at all. We had a chips and salsa bar with like Family members made different kinds of salsa. So it was like 17, not 17, it was a lot of different kinds of salsas, which was really fun. But there was no requirements, there was no serving requirements, like food handler safety. There was no cooking requirements or anything like that. So usually if a venue has that, they're not going to back away from that, right? They're not going to allow you to bring in any sort of home-cooked option. Your best bet would be to find a caterer that is willing to do a couple different options for you, or kind of have some fun with that, but you will be looking at a bigger price tag. So if they require a caterer, you're probably not gonna be able to get out of it. If you want to get more creative with the meal, it's going to cost you more. Another option you could do is maybe hire a food truck or two to give you a little bit of variety. They basically said it just has to be served, not like sit down, but just staff. So anyone can cook it, Brittany? Is that what I'm understanding? I love when people are here in the call because then I can be like, wait, give me more information. Um, and it has to be served, then obviously you could do it with just a waitstaff if you can DIY the food. Okay, I'll give you a second to type. Also, in a situation like this, I'll answer as if you are able to DIY food while you're typing. Just cater, like, we have to have people serve. Okay, so people cannot self-serve. That's literally the only limitation. People cannot self-serve. Okay, anytime you go grain-based, way cheaper. So pasta, cheap. Beans and rice, cheap lentils, if that's your thing. Not for many, you know, not for many, but if it is, that is a really great base that you can do. And those also keep well temperature-wise if they are cooked appropriately and have the appropriate amount of liquid and/or humidity. So they don't, you know, no one really likes dry rice, that kind of thing. So that could be a really good option. And then you can get a weight staff, kind of how we talked about earlier. Warm orzo salad works. Wasn't true. Yeah, if you want to unmute for a sec, you totally can. Um, usually for the most part we keep mics off just because I get super distracted. But yeah, if we have a specific question like this in the future, feel free to be like, is it okay if I just jump on the mic? Absolutely. Okay, also warm orzo salad. Anytime somebody uses warm salad or cold soup, I just get confused, you know? Like, is it a salad or is it a pasta? Because it's orzo, which is a pasta. So then at what point is it a salad I don't know. I don't know. Brittany, did that answer your question? Yes. And can you hear me now? Yeah, yeah, I can hear you. Okay. Yes, we were just confused because they basically said we don't have to have a sit-down service, we don't have to have caterers in that way, but they have a kitchen and it has to be served like they do the serving. So we're not just DIYing pancakes and stuff up in there, like, you know. So that was my question. Just a minimum of self-preservation. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, yes. I mean, I'd have to see the— okay, cut down that cost as much as possible because we're not like— we just went to a wedding where they had kind of like a charcuterie-style meal, and I feel like that was cheaper. So that's kind of where my thinking is coming from, like, what's the cheapest way that we could get a bunch of food together without, you know— that was, that was like my logic behind it. Yeah, yeah. Um, you can rent chafing dishes, those are pretty cheap, um, through a rental company, and then just get your own sternos. I don't know if they have those available through rental companies. Um, at least not that I've seen. And then you can also get waitstaff, and then you just decide what you want to be put in the chafing dishes. The most difficult part about DIY catering is not just the flavor, right? But temperature control. You don't want anything getting too warm or too cold. So how do you keep that constant temperature is going to be the most important part. And that's obviously why catering is— or when you have an actual caterer, that's their top concern. Um, you know, so you don't have a warm salad. No offense. Or cold soup. Gosh, how many times in videos have I said, 'cause no one wants cold chicken or a hot salad, but apparently a warm salad is okay. If you are struggling with wedding planning and you have questions and you just need someone to listen and to chat with, come join us in the Master Plan community over at themasterplanwed.com. I would love to have you in there. Thanks so much for listening. If you haven't done so already, subscribe, jump on over to wherever you're listening to this podcast and leave a 5-star review so we can let the podcast people know that Jamie knows what she's talking about sometimes. And until next time, bye guys!