Ming (Agents of Speech) advises caregivers of children on the autism spectrum to prioritize giving—consistent rewards, fun, social interaction, and preferred items—before expecting language gains. Trust is built through abundant, non-coercive reinforcement; once trust exists, caregivers can begin asking for language and are more likely to receive spontaneous, reciprocal communication rather than only need-based requests.
When you're building a routine, don't expect language to come because you're building routine as a routine. When you are teaching anyone, especially those who are on a spectrum, the rule of thumb is to give, give, give, give, give, give, give, give, give, keep on giving in terms of reward, fun, socializing, toys, whatever, keep on giving. And then you can start receiving language because then you are in the position to ask because the child now trusts you. No one talks about this. If your child doesn't trust you and you are like ruling your child over with fear and with prompting questions, your child will always be need based the language because they will only talk to you when they need something and not one day feel like they're having fun with you. And when you're giving so much, it's natural for someone to reciprocate. Even for a person who is on the spectrum.
