Short advice on preventing and addressing children's tantrums by teaching children ways to obtain desired outcomes, providing clear escape or endpoint signals for aversive tasks, and recognizing attention-seeking motives (both positive praise-seeking and negative attention). The speaker emphasizes that lack of an end or warning for unpleasant activities can lead to tantrums.
In terms of wanting something, what you want to do is to teach them a way to get what they want. That's the first. Secondly, if they're trying to escape, give them a means of escaping. Meaning if you finish this after you finish this, and there's a condition right after you finish this, then you can go let them know how long more. The worst thing in life, I believe, from my perspective, is to do something that is not enjoyable over and over and there's no end to it. That's the definition of suffering. So if your child's trying to escape from something and you're not giving your child a heads up about how long it's going to be, you're going to lead your child towards a tantrum. Okay? And the third thing is attention seeking. There are two different types of attention. There's positive attention, like wanting you to actually praise. There's also negative attention, like scolding, pointing fingers, making them feel bad. Why would a child want negative attention on him or her? Because sometimes children don't understand emotions yet and they would rather have that attention from you when this happens.
