Ming explains how parents accidentally teach kids to ignore them by calling their name repeatedly and getting louder. Kids learn to respond only when adults escalate. Instead, praise and reward attention immediately, then gradually fade the rewards.
Parents are sometimes actively teaching the child that ignoring is okay. And what I mean by that is, what are you going to do when your child ignores you the first time? You're going to repeat their name over and over and you will increase the volume. And what does that teach the child is that I can ignore mom once, twice, three times, four times, five times, and then until you scream and shout and then you're like, oh, okay, fine. So you're teaching your child to only respond to you when you go overboard. You're teaching them to ignore you. It's okay if you speak in your normal tone, and when you call them, it means that they don't need to respond to you. So your question would be, okay, so how can I do it? Because they never respond to with their names anyways. We need a praise and reward. Whenever they do look at us and they do pay attention to us and how we do that is obviously the easiest way is to have a reward in your hand. And some might say this is highly unnatural because we're like teaching a pet. I think this is the most effective way. But once we get there, we can slowly decrease the unnaturalness and make it more functional for the kid.
