Alexandra NielDivorce Recovery Coach, ANiel International, LLC. · I help women who held it all together through divorce finally build a life that’s actually theirs | Thrive After Divorce

A Soft Reminder That You're Okay | The Real Work of Healing

5 May 2025 · 1 min

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In this brief excerpt from her YouTube monologue, Alexandra Niel shares a listener’s gratitude for a gentle reminder that "where I am is okay" and reflects on the nature of emotional healing after a breakup. She argues that transformation is rarely a sudden, dramatic event; instead, it unfolds through small, recurring nudges that prompt self‑check‑ins and incremental shifts in self‑perception. By acknowledging that she is no longer the person she was before the breakup, she illustrates how these subtle prompts help re‑anchor a sense of safety and acceptance in the present moment, even amid the upheaval of a marriage ending.

Chapters

And she just said to me recently, thank you for the nudge, thank you for the reminder that where I am is okay and what I'm doing is okay and my world will be okay. And sometimes it's just— transformation isn't that sort of getting up in the morning and all of a sudden the lights are on and the sun is shining. It's like, yeah, who does that? It usually is that little moment where you go, you check yourself and you go, hang on. I'm not that person I was last week. I'm not that person I was, you know, when my marriage broke up and things started to go wrong. And whether you've initiated the breakup or not, it's still an extraordinary process, isn't it, to have to go through? Yeah, but it was just that lovely nudge, the little nudge that she received.