5 Simple Keys to Unlock More Joy in Your Journey with Amberly Lago

Welcome to the Amberly Lago Show, stories of true grit and grace. Hey there, thank you so much for tuning in to the Amberly Lago Show, y'all. This is the official last episode of 2024, and it's also Christmas. So Merry Christmas, happy holidays. Um, because it is Christmas, I wanted to drop in and just Make an episode for you, from my heart to yours, to spark more, more joy for the holiday season and throughout 2025. And I have some good news to share with you. If you didn't know, my newest book, Joy Through the Journey, is now available. Y'all, this has been a sticky note on my computer for 2 years. And then it took me months too of getting up at 4 o'clock in the morning to make sure I wrote out everything that I have learned through life's ups and downs, through living with chronic pain on a daily basis, which still allows me to spark joy. And I remember being in physical therapy once, and there was a guy that wanted to come and meet me because he had a similar accident to me, and I could barely walk. And I remember walking in a circle— well, kind of hobbling around in a circle— and I had the biggest smile on my face, and I was so happy just to be on my And the guy looked at my physical therapist and he's like, "What's wrong with her? Does she not know how bad this is? How serious this is? Like, what's wrong with her?" So through every situation, through challenges with work or with my health in this past year, I've still been able to spark joy. And I want to share how I've been able to do that with you. So no matter what you're going through, you can embrace the present moment. You can create and cultivate more resilience to get through. Through the journey, especially if you're an entrepreneur, especially if you live with chronic pain like me, or especially if you are a mom and a wife or a husband and, you know, and you're trying to do all the things because I know I'm trying to do all the things. And it's so important to have, you know, joy along the journey, to really enjoy the journey. And, you know, recently, if you watch my social media, then you already know That I lost my little Goldie Bear, my little 2.5-pound dog. She was 14, and it was very unexpected, even though she was a little, a little old lady. The way that she passed away was very traumatic and very, very unexpected, and she was just my love. Who would have thought a little 2.5-pound ball of fur could give you so much love? And I knew it was going to be hard when we lost her, but I didn't think it was going to be this hard. Y'all, I could not stop crying. I— it was— I'm the one that found her, and I could not stop crying. And in that moment, I just wanted to stop crying. It wasn't that I was trying to not acknowledge the feelings, but I was like, I just want to stop crying for a little bit. Can I please have some joy at this moment? And so what I did in that moment was I thought, Okay, what is going to bring me some joy despite this pain I'm going through? And I thought, I'm going to put up my Christmas tree because that brings me joy. And I started putting up my Christmas tree and decorated my whole house for Christmas earlier than I had ever— I've ever done before. And I put the Christmas tree where, um, Goldie's bed usually was, and that allowed me to stop crying for a bit. And it did bring me some joy. And then I thought, well, I'm still crying now. I need to spark more joy. What can I do? And I was like, you know what, I gotta go out there and do some joy spotting. And what I mean by joy spotting is I wanted to look for things that brought me joy, whether it was, you know, a beautiful blue sky, a butterfly, hearing a song, seeing somebody I knew. And so I thought, I'm gonna go to HomeGoods. Because I need to be connected with some people and smile at them and see them smile back at me. And whatever we seek, we will find. It's kind of like, I remember when I was pregnant, and all of a sudden, all I saw everywhere I went was pregnant women. I was like, golly, there's so many pregnant people. I remember when I wanted to get a new car, everywhere I looked, I saw that car when I never noticed them before. So what you really seek out and what is on your mind and what you're thinking about constantly, that is what you are going to find. And so I was on a mission to go find joy. And guess what I saw? The first thing that I saw when I walked into HomeGoods, a little sign that said joy. And I thought, thank you, God. That's a, that's a God wink. And every person that I saw in the store, I intentionally smiled at them. I asked them how they were doing. Um, I striked up a conversation. And you know what? Just feeling connected like that and seeing their smiles back at me, That brought me joy. So go move your body. You don't have to sit still. Moving your body moves your mood. Change your environment. Do something that sparks joy, whether that is going for a walk, whether it's calling a friend, whether it's getting up and dancing, whether it's going barefoot and walking across your lawn, whether it's going out and being kind to strangers and smiling so you can see them smile back, whether you know it's choosing to be a joy sparker. And I wanted to give you five. 5 things, 5 things that you can do throughout the holiday season, especially if it's a hard one, or just things that you can do throughout 2025 to have more joy throughout your journey of life's ups and downs. So number 1, it's, it's your perspective, shifting your perspective, and it's transforming challenges into growth, whether that is You know, a failure, or whether that is you know you lost your job. I tell you what, what what instead of saying oh I failed at this, well what can you learn from this? I remember you know when I was out of work and I couldn't train clients anymore in the fitness industry, it just wasn't working out for me to change or to train 12 to 14 clients a day, and I was really. Sad about that for a while until I thought about, well, I maybe I can't train clients on my feet for 12 to 14 hours a day, but what can I do? What does spark joy? And it allowed me to go, well, I love working with people, and it allowed me to go, you know what? I can train clients in another way. I can do more business training. I help so many trainers with their business. I can just shift that into entrepreneurship. And you know what? It has taken me on such. A wild, exciting journey of now I have my mastermind. Now I get to speak across the country, in different countries. I spoke in France last year. And so open your mind to what can you learn from it? How can you grow from it? And what else might you be able to do? So also the role of being in the present, be in the present moment. Um, I tend to think about things that are in the future, especially when I have big speaking events coming up or deadlines, and that makes me worry or get anxious. I sometimes think about, oh, I could have done that better, or thinking about mistakes I made in not a great way. And I have to go, how can I be in the present moment right now? Because that's all we really have. The past is the past. It's happened. We can't change it. There's nothing we can do about what we did. There's not really much we can predict about the future. We're not in control. But what we can do is be in the present moment. And I have had to really, with a lot of big events coming up and starting in January, I am going to be traveling nonstop, y'all. I'm going to be in Minnesota, in New York, in San Diego, in Los Angeles, and I'll be in Arizona. I will be in Vegas. I mean, I'm, I'm going to be all over the place. And I tend to get in my head about what am I going to wear for this event? Oh, do I have that keynote down? I get anxious. So I would be in bed at night with my heart beating a mile a minute. And I'm like, this is not joyful right now. I need to be in the present moment and focus on I have a comfy, warm bed to sleep in, a roof over my head. And then I have the Calm app. Now, I'm not affiliated with the Calm app. There are so many different apps out there that have great meditations. They allow me to really plug one in and listen and get in the present moment. There's one I do on the Calm app, and it really— it's getting in touch with your body. So it's getting in, like, focusing on feeling your feet, focusing on going all the way up your legs to your heart, to your head, and then doing a breathing technique. And the breathing technique is just, you know, breathing in for 8 counts, holding it for 7 counts. And no, actually, I'm sorry, I got that wrong. It's breathing in for 4, holding it for 8, letting it out for 7, something like that. Y'all, I get it wrong. That's why I use the app, because I need somebody to guide me on this. So it does get you in the present moment. And I promise you, if you can do anything like that, if you're in bed and you can't shut your mind off, Well, I do a brain dump. Look, here's my brain dump on my desk right now. I do a brain dump so I don't have to think about it when I get in bed. But if I'm still thinking about things that I'm getting nervous about, I use an app to help me with that. Another, another thing that you can do for mindfulness is do the 5-4-3-2-1 method. So what I mean by that is getting in the present moment is what is one thing that you can see? Like, just be aware of your surroundings. What's one thing you can see, whether it's a bird flying by, whether it's a beauty— like in my office, I have beautiful plants. Focusing on the plants, focus, focusing on our waterfall outside. What's one thing that you can touch to get in the present moment? What is one thing that you can hear? I have wind chimes outside, and that reminds me I am in the present moment. I can hear a beautiful wind chime. It actually reminds me of my stepdaddy Dwight that That passed away. What's one thing you can smell? Oh my goodness. Smell is so powerful. We were in Walmart. Yeah, I was in Walmart with Ruby last night and we were looking for a gift for her best friend. And I smelled this one lotion that reminded me of a smell of some medicine that I had to take when I was a little girl. And I got physically, I started gagging. Oh my goodness. Smell is powerful. So make sure it's a smell in a good way. And then taste. What's one thing that you can taste? Is it your delicious hot coffee? Is it, you know, a mint that you put in your mouth? What? So 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 to get you in the present moment. Um, and again, like Headspace or the Calm app can offer practical guided, you know, mindfulness, um, Activities for you to really get in the present moment. Uh, I think in my book I talk so much about gratitude. I had to, to— so the next thing, number 3, is gratitude. And I had to edit the index and I was like, wow, I didn't realize how much I talked about gratitude in this book. But gratitude sparks joy. When you're grateful, you do not have time. You don't feel fear. You don't feel anxious. You don't feel sadness. Try it. If you're grateful, you can't feel any other thing except for gratitude and joy. And so how gratitude, it really activates the neural pathways that strengthen emotional resilience, and it helps you bounce back faster from stress. So I journal every morning a gratitude. You know what? Maybe I'll just share that with you. So I have an app again. I'm not affiliated with this, this app, but it's called My Spiritual Toolkit. They have tools on there and you can go to a gratitude list and I'll just read you. You can list 10. I'll just read you a few things today, December 17th, that I'm recording this. But Merry Christmas. It's coming out on the 25th. December 17th, another day. Number one, I wrote down another day to wake up hangover-free and clear. A great morning meeting and amazing Sober fellas I have grown to love. Number 3, Ruby got medicine she needs for tonsillitis. Number 4, almost done with Christmas shopping. Number 5, Savannah sends me cute pics of Tofu. Number 6, a meeting with my team that I love working with. Number 7, I recorded 2 interviews yesterday. Number 8, hot coffee. Number 9, I got paid for an event and it's helping cover bills for my own annual event. Number 10, all of you and being connected daily. So that was my gratitude list. It's not extravagant. It's simple, but it put me in the moment of all the good that is going on in my life. I encourage you to not just write your gratitude, but to express it. Maybe have some— like, I call my group of ladies, I share that through the app. I share it with my God Squad, and I get to read what they're grateful for as well. Because it's one thing to feel it. It's one thing to write it down. It's one thing to express it. And it's so powerful and it shifts your perspective when you can read what somebody else is grateful for. And so I really encourage you to practice gratitude, journal it, think about one thing that you're grateful for when you go to bed at night and what's the best thing that happened to you, because that really sets your subconscious up in a way that prepares you to be even more grateful the next day. And so really share your gratitude. And then one other thing about gratitude, I would really highly suggest Sending out one to hopefully three text messages to people that pop in your head or that you're really thinking about, and tell them what you see in them and what you're grateful for. You have no idea how that could just shift their day to hear from you. So number four, finding joy in small wins. Look, progress over perfection, and it doesn't have to be some huge paycheck in the mail or some. Big award that you won, or look, it wasn't about finishing my whole manuscript to turn into my publisher. I had to celebrate the small wins along the way, which was I promised myself that I would write 2 chapters a week, and then I celebrated. Hallelujah! I did 2 chapters of the book. I'm getting closer. When I, when I got out of the hospital, Let me tell you, I set small attainable goals. And one of my goals that I really celebrated, and this might seem kind of silly, but it was a big goal for me at the time, but it's small looking back, was I wanted to be able to use the bathroom on my own. I couldn't even stand up and I had to use a bedpan. So I celebrated the small goals along the way of being able to stand on one leg with crutches, for 1 second at a time. And then I set a goal of, okay, tomorrow I am going to stand up no matter how painful it is. I'm going to count 1 1,000, 2 1,000, 3 1,000, and stand up for 3 seconds at a time tomorrow. Then it was 10 seconds. And then my goal was to be able to stand up long enough to walk on crutches across the living room, down a short hallway, and into the bathroom and use the bathroom on my own. If I would have set a goal of I'm running a marathon. It was just that was unattainable. I'd probably still be in a hospital bed depressed about it. But by setting these small attainable goals and celebrating those goals along the way, I was able to make progress and focus on the progress and not perfection along the way. So, you know, celebrate the small things. One client, one coaching client at a time. Instead of thinking on I need to have 30 coaching clients, celebrate that you got. one coaching client and send them a thank you note in the mail, or reach out to them by text and celebrate their wins. Which leads me to number 5, connection and contribution. Let me tell you, I feel like true joy for me and fulfillment for me is really celebrating others and Being of service to others and their success. That is where true fulfillment really is for me. It's that connection. Like when I went into the store, just to be able to smile at people and see them smile back. And it's the contribution. How can you go help somebody? I learned in recovery a long time ago that what you give away, you get to keep. And that might seem kind of like a weird thing to say, but I get to keep my sobriety because I give it away. When I can go out there and be of service to other people in recovery, other recovering alcoholics, then I get to keep my sobriety. When I get to go to meetings and contribute and be there for others, to be there for a newcomer or just to have fellowship before and after a meeting, I get to stay sober. I had a client a long time ago, and she told me, she goes, you know, I'm just not happy. I'm actually bored. And I said, why don't you go volunteer somewhere? And she goes, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. I said, but there are soup kitchens, there's mentoring, there's environmental projects. Go be of service, because that is really the gateway to true fulfillment, happiness, and sparking more joy. And so I think random acts of kindness wherever you go. Maybe you can't go out there and volunteer, but you can volunteer your time by Listening, I remember being stuck in the hospital bed, and I was still able to you know be of service. And people go, well, how could you be of service when you were stuck in a hospital bed? Let me tell you, I was still writing out nutrition plans for clients. I was setting up clients and their plans with other trainers. I was even talking to nurses. They had a little chair in the corner of my room and this curtain that they would pull over and pull shut, and they would plop themselves down and just be exhausted and just sometimes cry to me. Or just tell me what was going on in their life, and I was just there to listen, and that was my way that I could contribute and be of service. So how can you create a weekly check-in with a loved one or with a friend? You know, I have friends that were also diagnosed with complex regional pain syndrome, and you know, my good friend David, who has he was diagnosed with CRPS, just had just had a heart attack, and we keep in touch, and he's actually been a guest on the podcast when it was True Grit and. Grace. He's got an amazing story, but just being able to check in with him often, to check in with my other friend Kelly, who is a CRPS warrior and is battling a major flare-up right now. Kelly, I don't know if you're listening, but I love you and my heart goes out to you, and I'm praying for speedy recovery and that that flare-up goes away completely. So how can you act? You know, practice random acts of kindness. How can you reach out to somebody who might need you, who might need some support? I think it's one reason. reason why people ask me what I'm most passionate about, and I tell them I love speaking. But the reason I love speaking is because I love— it's the connection. I love connecting with an audience. I love connecting with people after I speak and hearing their stories, because everyone has a story. You have a story, and your story is important, and you are perfectly qualified to go help someone that is struggling with something that you have already been through and you've gotten to the other side. So Go start sharing your story, whether that's through social media, whether that's at your church, whether that's at a recovery meeting, or whether that's just with a friend. But reach out to someone. And again, these are the 5 ways, just part, little small part of my book, Joy Through the Journey, to cultivate more resilience and embrace the present moment. And so, number 1, it's the power of perspective. Number 2, it's the role of Presence, getting into the present moment, getting grounded, whatever you need to do, stay grounded. Number 3, practice gratitude, cultivating daily gratitude. Number 4, find joy in the small wins. I really encourage you to celebrate the small wins. When I was a fitness trainer, it wasn't about I'm going to celebrate when I lose 50 pounds, or I'm going to celebrate when I gain 3% more muscle mass. No, it's celebrating the weekly win of if you lost half a pound in that week or if you lost 1 pound in 1 month. It's celebrating every small win along the way. So find joy in those small wins. And it is connection and contribution. Be connected. Stay connected. Look, grit without connection is just resilience. It's not joy. Grit with connection That is where you're going to spark joy. That is where you're going to cultivate more resilience. So I encourage you to really implement these things into your life and so you could thrive in 2025. Thank you so much for tuning into the show. Please make sure you are subscribed to the show and I would love for you to write a review for the show that really helps more people find the show. But it also— I read every one of those and it helps me to see what really resonates resonates with you more. I want to provide you with the most information and guests that come on the show that offer their wisdom that's really going to educate you, inspire you, and empower you to level up your life and your business. So it really helps me. And tag me if you enjoyed this show. Tag me on Instagram. When I see that at Amberly Lago Motivation, I share it too. Hope to see you in Dallas in 2025. April 25th and 26th for the Unstoppable Success Summit. Go to amberlylago.com. You can find out more information, and I'll see you there. I'll see you next week on the show. Thank you so much and have a very, very Merry Christmas.