Becoming the Best You: Elyse Archer on Strategic Thinking and Personal Growth

Welcome to the Amberly Lago Show, stories of true grit and grace. Hey there, thank you so much for tuning in to the Amberly Lago Show. This show is— I'm so excited to have this guest on. Elise Archer is here, and if you've ever wanted to really expand your brand, really get strategic about your sales, I am excited for you to listen. So get your notepad and your pen. Elise, thank you for being on the show. She's the founder of She Sells, and you have been like such a big influence in my life. I remember meeting you, gosh, was it 5 years ago?

About 5 years ago. 5 years ago. Yeah.

And you told me something that really changed everything for me as far as like branding. And so I've been excited to have you on the show to help other people like really expand and their branding and, and help them with strategically selling because we're all selling, whether it's coaching or ourselves for speaking events or a book or whatever, we're all— or getting people to listen to our podcast. So thank you for being here and welcome to the show.

This is such an honor. It's, it's so much fun to be here in person with you and to feel your energy in person.

It's been forever and I can't believe we're finally meeting in person. It feels crazy that I've known you for so long and we've only connected over the phone or on Zoom and to finally have you here in person. So thank you for being here.

Thank you. I feel like it's always divine timing and it's, it's never on accident when paths cross. So this is so fun.

Yeah. And yeah, I mean, you've been changing diapers and doing all kinds of stuff and now that you're here, but how did you get into the, the branding and the sales strategy and all that you do? Because you are a genius at that. How did you get into that? Oh my gosh.

Yeah, it's been a long journey. You know, I originally actually went to school for journalism and I thought I was going to do the news ed path. And this will date me.

Really?

Oh, yeah. But I thought I was going to go be a newspaper reporter. And I remember vividly sitting in my class and I was, I don't know, 20 or something at the time. And the professor shared what you would make as a newspaper reporter. And I just remember it even in my, you know, late teens, early 20s brain. I was like, I don't think that's going to cut it. Like, Mama likes shoes too much. That's just not going to work. You're like, no, I need to make more than that. Yeah, exactly. So, quickly pivoted and decided to go into corporate sales. I was like, what job sounds good, right? What sounds like I'll be successful, I'll be accomplished? I ended up going into corporate marketing sales, rose to the top of the leaderboard in my mid-20s, was working with large national accounts doing marketing, and kind of looked on the outside like I had it all together. You know, the nice house, the nice car.

Yeah.

Was in a marriage that looked good on the outside, right? All the things. But inside, what I wasn't telling anyone was how much I was struggling.

Really?

Panic attacks.

Really?

Eating disorder, crippling anxiety, so scared of losing everything and also working so hard to try to keep the results and kind of put out this image that I had it all together, that I was successful, that I was accomplished. And so, I remember vividly, this was before my 28th birthday, and 28 has always been a special number to me. I was born on the 28th. I see 28s everywhere. It's kind of just my number. And I just remember looking around at my life and saying everything that I had built up around me was what I thought I was supposed to do to be happy and successful and fulfilled.

Mm-hmm.

Yet the outside was so different from how I was feeling on the inside. And I said, I'm not available to go into this one 28th year of my life that I get, at least in this lifetime, living in this way and feeling so empty inside. And so, I went on a big personal development journey. I left the corporate job. I had one client who had paid me $300. I was like, I'm going to go be a sales coach. I know I can help people with that. I'm good at that.

Yeah.

One client had paid me $300 to review a presentation for him. And I was like, it's proof of concept. I can make money outside of corporate. So I'm out.

Wow.

I probably have a higher risk tolerance than a lot of people, but I was like, this is good. I'm out. I left the marriage.

You did?

Yeah. And I was petrified. I was petrified of the judgment that I thought I would get for— I hadn't been married very long, only 14 months. I was petrified of the judgment I thought I would get for leaving and for being divorced in my 20s. I knew in my soul I needed to do it. And I think this was one of the first times in my life I started really honoring my truth versus what I thought everyone around me thought I should do, what I thought would make them happy. And I went all out.

What gave you the courage to do that?

It's a great question. And I can tie all of this into sales and branding for you too, because I know people are like, she asked about sales and branding. I can tie it all back in. At the time, it was interesting. This was right around the time when I discovered personal development.

Yeah.

And it was— I grew up in a household that was very intellectually driven. Like, my parents are both Ivy League grads, smart, intelligent people. Academics were a big thing. But the inner work wasn't really ever something that was talked about. And I remember around this time in my life, there was so much noise in my head. telling me that everything was wrong, that everything in my life was wrong, but I didn't wanna listen. And I had these long commutes 'cause I was in outside sales. And so I would drive an hour, hour and a half, 3 hours to go visit a client or an account. And I had to have something to fill the silence because if I sat with the silence and listened to what I was saying, what my voice was saying to me, it was almost too painful to listen to. So I actually stumbled across podcasting at that time. I had no idea it was like—

Is it that many years ago?

But I stumbled— When was this? Oh my gosh, 2013, 2014 or something like that.

So that's back when podcasts were not as popular as they are now.

Right, exactly. Yeah.

People were just hearing the word podcast. Like a lot of people didn't know what a podcast was.

Yeah, exactly. It was, yeah, it was, it was way back in the day. And actually one of the first ones I found was Rory Vaden, who you and I—

Oh, really?

Yeah, mutual friend. Yep, yep, yep. And I remember listening to his and then I started going into other personal development type shows and I was like, wait, I have the power to transform my life from the inside out, and I can actually change all of this. And so I think listening to that and listening to other people talking about stories of courage, listening to themselves— I'd so cut off from my body and my instincts for so much of my life, my teens and 20s. I think many of us, especially women, can relate to that, whether it's sexual trauma, um, all sorts of things can happen where we cut off from our bodies and our knowing.

Yeah.

But I just remember saying, I don't know what's on the other side of walking away from everything that I've built up in my life up until now, but it can't be worse, or I'm willing to see—

What's out there.

What's on the other side versus continuing to live this life that feels so untrue and inauthentic to me, who I really am at my core.

So when I met you, were you working with Roaring Jaden?

Yeah.

Okay. Is that what it was?

Yes. So long, long, long story there, but Ended up working with Rory and AJ, his beautiful wife.

Yeah. So you guys, if you have listened to the podcast, you've heard me interview AJ Baden from Brand Builders. So they're friends of mine and I talk to Rory all the time. But yeah, so you, that's how I first originally met you.

That's how we connected. So we ended up working together. I worked with him for years, first in a sales coaching company and then as part of Brand Builders Group. But it was a, Also talk about like divine timing and synchronicity that listening to his show, and I don't even think he knows that, but listening to his show was some of what helped me start to get out of those life scenarios that I'd built up that weren't true to me. Yeah. And then ultimately ended up working with them and now, you know, work for myself and do something else. But yeah, dear, dear friends. And that's how, yeah, that's how you and I connected, which is so fun.

Yeah. And that's how when I first met you, You were, oh my goodness, I remember talking with you and you just made it so perfectly clear. You told me something. You said, and this is something I'll never forget. You said, imagine if you have a wall and you've got all these different ideas and you're taking the hammer and you're hitting. I don't know if this is exactly how you said this, but this is how I imagine or remember it.

Yeah.

And you take that hammer and you're hitting all different parts of the wall. You have all these different ideas and you're hitting, or you have this one idea and you just keep knocking that idea.

Yes.

And you bust a hole through the wall and you get to the other side. And the other side is where your clients are, the stages are, the podcast interviews, everything is on the other side of that wall.

Yeah.

I don't know if that's exactly how you said it, but that's how I imagine it. That's how I describe it. And it's like, That's how I started to build my brand was I just was talking about like how to turn pain to purpose, like complex regional pain syndrome and how you get through that, how you learn to walk again, how you get through adversity. And I was talking about resilience a lot. How did you get into branding and what is the best thing for somebody else who is like, well, I don't know what my brand is. I don't know how to brand.

Right.

So first of all, how did you get into that branding and sales strategy? Or do you just feel like you're naturally gifted at explaining that and doing that?

No, I thank you for asking the question. I do. So there's many things in life that I'm not good at. Like I always tell people, if you want to go lose a trivia game, take me as your buddy to trivia because we will lose. Or if you want to go to a sports game and have a terrible time, take me with you. Like I'll be eating the food, I'll be having fun, but I'll have no idea what's going on. I do think sales and marketing are some of my natural gifts. So, I think it's always helpful when you're looking at someone else who's doing something like to acknowledge people have natural gifts, right? And I think part of how we build excellence in our space is getting really clear on what are our gifts and leaning into those. Kind of like you were just talking about that concept of the wall, right? Which is, we call it Sheehan's Wall. It's a Brand Builders Group concept. So, breaking through that wall requires being very focused and specific. But I remember, This was when I was in sales and I was in corporate sales. So before I had made a lot of even like big life transitions like we talked about before, I was selling digital marketing, branding, social media services to these companies to help brand them.

You were selling social media services?

Oh, back in the day when people were like, what's Facebook? What? Yeah, this was really back in the day. But I remember it was interesting because I was doing outbound sales and what they were telling us was like, It was cold calling, right? It was calling, just smile and dial, smile and dial. And that always—

Smile and dial. That's a saying, huh?

Oh, it's for anyone listening who— my salespeople out there or entrepreneurs who have been salespeople, we know it's like, just make 100 dials, say the same thing. This is so much of what's taught in the sales world. And I remember at the time thinking, well, why am I teaching these companies how to create brand and attraction and inbound lead gen When everything I'm doing is like, I'm having to introduce myself every time, I'm reaching, I'm annoying them, I'm a nuisance calling them. Why don't I take the same concepts that I'm applying to companies to teach them how to brand and start applying it to myself to build my own individual brand? And so I started doing that. And this was, again, this was early days of social media and marketing and online branding. But I started hosting my own webinars. I started doing livestreams, which were—

I don't even know how I got on a call with you. Back in the day. I don't remember. I don't know how I got lucky enough to get on a call with you, but I did. And that's been years later. And I just loved what you shared. It didn't feel like a smile and dial kind of a call. It felt like you really gave me a lot of value.

Well, thank you for that. And yeah, that never felt aligned, which is part of why I decided to go into sales coaching and I wanted to teach. branding and sales from a place of generosity, from a place of abundance. Because I think there's just so much conditioning in my life and that I saw around me of like sales and business has to be dog-eat-dog and it's competitive and that there's so much scarcity mindset.

Yeah.

And I think that's a large part of what contributed to the eating disorder, the panic attacks, all of it. It was like I thought to be successful, I had to do things in a way that felt really misaligned and inauthentic to who I am at my core. And I think a lot of us can relate to that. But what I've found has been the opposite. It's been the more I lean into generosity, showing up, sharing my gifts, and just like you do here, right, with your show and with your work, and the more we kind of trust in that flow of giving and sharing our gifts and, you know, doing, of course, the right strategies for client attraction, but coming from that place. I call it abundance selling versus scarcity selling, coming from that place of abundance. Everything really works well. We're in flow, we're connected, we receive clients more easily. So that's been— there's a lot of inner shifts that come along with that as well. And it's been maybe a 10-year journey now in my life of practicing and embodying those principles. But I want to help as many people as possible do that.

Well, do you work mostly with individuals or companies or both?

Yeah, both. Both. I'd say 70, 80% of our clients are individuals, entrepreneurs or sales professionals. Typically, we work with women who want to go from anywhere from 6 to 7 figures in their brand or income. But I'm having fun with this, and we're working with a lot more companies too, going out and teaching what I call superhuman selling, which we call the 4 quadrants of quantum sales growth. And I've got a free gift that your listeners can use, and I'll share that later, that they can go through and learn those for themselves. But a lot of companies now, I think— Okay, awesome.

Well, we will definitely put that in the show notes.

Yeah, thank you.

I wanted to say, you know, when I first started, you know, I had a lot of debt. In fact, we had $2.9 million worth of debt. We had a lien on our house. It was crazy. And there's, I couldn't, I was like, what can I do to, I have this idea of writing a book and I'm going to write this book, but I don't have the money for marketing or branding or to hire anybody. I just got to figure it out on my own. And I started just like, what's free?

Yeah.

And I thought, I'm just going to use social media. Yes. And what— there are a lot of people out there that are like, I've got this business idea and I want to, you know, really expand my business and my brand. I'm not sure I have the funds or anything to hire a company. What is something you could offer somebody that they could do right now that is like, I really want to increase my influence and impact? What can they do that wouldn't cost them an arm and a leg?

Yeah, absolutely. Oh my gosh, there's so So I can approach that question 2 different ways, and you tell me what would be more valuable to your listeners. I can talk about from the inner game, how we start to really crystallize and get clear on what we want to have happen in our business and our life and how to draw that to us. Or I can talk strategically. What would be more valuable to your listeners?

Both. Both. Like the inner game and then strategically, what would you do?

So according to neuroscience, only 3 to 5% of our results in business or life are based on the actual strategic actions that we take. every day. The remaining 95 to 98% is based on our self-concept, our self-image, our subconscious programming. And, this is actually another part of what I teach is I was stuck at a certain income threshold for over a decade. No matter how hard I worked, I couldn't break past a certain plateau. When I learned how to do the inner game, I was able to literally 10x and turn my annual income into my monthly income in 6 weeks. And, it was like everything that I've been working so hard for doing all the right strategy, Wow. Suddenly came together, but it wasn't so much what I was doing. It was I shifted my self-concept. So the first thing I would say is get to get your subconscious mind on board with what you want to have happen in your business.

Get a very— I think a lot of that is like surrounding yourself with people who also are passionate and they're go-getters and they're doing things. If you're It's so much of who you're surrounding yourself with.

Oh, it is. Absolutely. Yeah. You want to learn to think. You want to find mentors, coaches, mastermind to learn how to think the way people think who have the results that you want.

Exactly.

So, to your question before of what can I do if I don't have a lot of money, start looking at, well, who are the people who have the results that you want? Maybe somebody's watching this and they're like, I would love to have a show like Amberly's, or I'd love to speak. Like Amberly, start digesting her content.

Well, just so you know, you can have a show like this. You can totally do this. Like, I did not know what I was doing when I started. I still don't. Okay. I still don't. I'm just figuring out as I go along. But that's the thing. You just do it. You just go. You're just like, this is what I want to do. Go for it.

That's it. You had to do it. And to your point, you had to develop the self-concept of someone who could actually do this, right? So there was probably a point in your career and brand where it was like, I can't imagine it. Like, if you can't see it for yourself, right? I think you have to see.

You have to have that vision.

Right, exactly, exactly. But someone could start watching your content or anyone else's who resonates and start saying, like, how does Amberly hold herself? And what must she think to be able to have a show like this? What must she think about herself? I mean, no crap, little Tom.

I forget that I'm on camera sometimes, and I'm like, yeah, so what? Like, what?

Oh yeah, I'm pretty sure I've been like that. Hold up, like, sit up tall. But so you start to look at people who are doing what it is that you want to do, and you just start asking yourself questions, right? So what would someone think? What would someone feel? And what actions would someone take who has that end result that I want to create in my life or in my business? And this is actually an exercise we take our clients through first thing When they come into our programs, we call it new personality versus old personality.

Okay.

And we have someone actually really look at what results do I want in my life, and then who would I need to be in order to get those results? Because in life, we don't get what we want, we get what we are. This is—

that's so good. And, you know, my husband talks to me a lot. He'll say, Amberly, you can't do that. You gotta— you're—

you—

he like tries to coach me, but he's very like hard on me. Well, I love you, Johnny, but yeah, he is a little hard on me. But he will say like, would Tony Robbins do that? Then you can't do that. Like, he makes me think like somebody that is way over my level.

Yeah.

And somebody that I really respect or I hold in high regard. He's like, he wants to try to get me to think like that person would think. Would that person do that? Would that person go And, you know, call. So, yeah, I get that. It helps.

Oh, yeah, absolutely. Because we're all stuck in the box of our own paradigm, which was, again, neuroscience, ages 0 to 7. That's when most of that is instilled. And we have all these beliefs and self-concepts about ourselves that aren't necessarily our highest truth. And so, in your husband's own maybe tough love way, right? He helps raise you up to a different level of thinking. And I think that's part of where real growth can happen. That's the power of coaching and mentorship is having someone mirror back to you. Do you realize what you just said about yourself? Do you really?

Yeah.

Would someone— and this is something we talk about, thinking from the end or decision-making from the end, from the end result being accomplished. Would you make that choice? Would you think that way? Would you say that about yourself? And so, it's part of how we quantum leap is we start going to the end result and practicing being that person in our mind. And then we start embodying them every day, which is easier said than done. It's a lot easier to say it out loud.

Do you think somebody can get to that point by themselves, or do you think they need a coach or a mentor to do that?

I think someone should always use the resources available, and I think you should stretch yourself way outside of your comfort zone if you really want to grow. Like, so part of what I didn't share about this, you know, in 6 weeks being able to 10x my income when I'd been stuck for over a decade was I had just gone and invested $50 grand I didn't have in mentorship. I didn't have it.

And I did that and it was exactly that much. It was $50 grand.

Okay, there you go.

And it still kind of makes me uncomfortable when I look at my bank account and see that money gone.

Yeah, well.

But, you know, you learn something from everything.

Oh, you do. You do. And I think, at least for me, being in— it was almost like a pressure cooker where it was like, I have to figure out a way to make this money back and then some. I was forced to come face to face with every limiting belief I'd ever had about who I was, what I was capable of. And so, I did a lot of deep inner work in that period of really transcending a lot of old stories about myself and quantum leaping.

Yeah.

But yeah. So, the bottom line is I think absolutely we need to have coaching and mentorship. And I think when you're looking for coaches and mentors, if it's an easy investment for you, you're probably not going to grow. So, that's one thing. I've invested money where it's like I didn't really have to think about it much and I didn't miss it when it was gone and I didn't ever use the program. Yeah, right. So I think use something where you're gonna be invested.

When you've got, when you've got some skin in the game.

Oh, that's it. Yeah.

You're like, okay, I better make this work.

Yeah, exactly. But look for a coach or mentor where you want to model again. You want to learn how they think. Don't hire them to teach you some magical strategy because Any strategy can work, right? You look at the sales and business world, there's one person doing a funnel and crushing it, another person trying to do the same funnel and they're having terrible results. It's all your belief system about it and what's in alignment, right? But hire a mentor to learn how they think and who also embodies the type of life that you want to live as well. Because there's a lot of people who are very successful in business but have no home life. They have a terrible balance, right?

That's so important that you just said that. To find a mentor or a coach or to go, what do they have? What is their home life like? What is their— what are their beliefs? What is their success in their business like? The whole package of how they are and what they— you can learn from them is crucial. Yeah.

Oh yeah, absolutely.

Yeah, totally. So give us some strategy now on somebody who can really start to do some strategy on like sales and marketing and branding and like, yeah, absolutely.

Give us the goods. I know how much time we got, right? So I would say one thing to what you talked about before, Amberly, about getting through that wall, right? And letting your kind of being heard above all the noise, because one of the biggest problems—

Yeah, because there's a lot of people and then I've got clients that they, they're like, well, I want to talk about relationships. And real estate and this and that. And I'm like, no, you got to like focus in, hone in on one thing and be known for one thing.

Absolutely. Absolutely.

So yeah, I try to explain that. And I actually give this example of what you gave me when I first met you. And it helps people visualize, oh, okay, this is what I need to do.

Yeah. And we can almost become bored of our own message, right? Or we think, oh, this isn't going to be interesting. I talked about this a week ago. I need to mix it up. And we also look at Major thought leaders, like you mentioned Tony Robbins before, right? So maybe somebody admires Tony Robbins, Lewis Howes, whoever they look at, say, well, they're talking about everything, right?

Yeah. They're like, Lewis Howes is talking about everything. Mel Robbins is talking about everything. But they started out with one thing.

They stayed very narrow.

Lewis Howes started out with LinkedIn.

He was LinkedIn, LinkedIn, LinkedIn.

Yeah. Same thing. Everybody starts out with one thing and you get well known about that.

That's it.

Then you can start talking about other things.

Exactly. Exactly. So I think that's one of the first things is just get clear on what is my one thing going to be that I'm gonna get known for? And then you become the ambassador for that message.

Mm-hmm.

And the way that I think about it, because one of the places where I see people get hung up, and especially entrepreneurs who are launching their own business, is they make it so personal, right? And we can make it mean so much about us. If somebody doesn't like me, they don't like my message, they don't like my business. And we almost end up like speaking for the critics or writing for the critics where we're like, let me just try to position this message in a way where I know I'm gonna get likes, where I know I'm not gonna offend anyone, where I know that Right. I know I'm gonna get a lot of good comments. And it's like, you're never going to really rise above the noise if you're so focused on what is everyone gonna think about what I'm saying.

Oh, I remember the first time I got haters. And I was like, oh my God, I was crying. Yeah, to be honest with you, I was crying. I was on The Doctors TV. And I was in a support group for complex regional pain syndrome. And they edited the interview to where they didn't, you know, it was like a 10-minute interview. They edited it to a few minutes and they didn't share how I had gone through a spinal stimulator and spinal blocks and ketamine infusions and all the treatments that I had tried. And they just said that girl cures pain with her mindset. And oh my goodness, the haters came out of the woodwork. And my husband was like, well, congratulations.

Yeah.

You finally got some haters. You've got some good, good. You got some haters and you're getting your message out there. But it was like, I was kind of guilty of like, I just want to help people and I didn't want to make anybody upset. And I definitely didn't want haters. But it's an opportunity for you to believe in your message or to go, okay, no, this is BS. And it was like, for me, it was like, no, I believe in my message and I'm going to keep going forward with my message. And so it was a big turning point for me.

It's painful and it's necessary, right? It is. I think for anyone who's going to have a real platform, and I would imagine if someone's listening to this, they don't have small aspirations for themselves, right? They see—

Oh, the listeners have big aspirations. Everybody that listens to this show.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we have to be willing. It's almost like a rite of passage a lot of times, right, to kind of withstand that and to have the haters and to go through that. And, I certainly struggled with this for quite some time when I was launching my brand and a lot of fear and worry about what are people going to think and say, blah, blah, blah. And, I've had my own experiences with haters in my own way. But, where I've come to is I see myself as a channel for this message and almost like an ambassador for this message. And, it's almost not personal. I know that sounds maybe strange, but it's like the experiences that we have, the experience you had, right, with the accident and the pain was preparing you to be a channel to come teach this and to be able to speak from experience in a really powerful way and to have your story resonate with people. I've had my own experiences that have been painful in different ways that helped shape me into a channel to be able to share this message. So, I think all of that to say, you have to get so sold on you. Right? You have to get so sold on you and being the leader of your message. It's like, why not me? Right? Go make a list of 10, 20, 50 reasons why you are the one to carry this message forth into the world. But then also, it's kind of this delicate dance of like, we can't be attached to what anyone thinks of us or to the results of it as well. But then you start sharing that generously, as generously as you can. With everyone that you can. So whether it's—

And that's what you did with me when I got on that first phone call with you. You were just so generous with your information and trying to, you know, help me any way you could. And I was like, what? What do I need to do? But yeah, that's how, like, we became friends.

Right, right. Well, and I think, and I saw this in you, and I think this is a key piece of it too, like just this This relentless persistence of like, no, this has happened, and that it factor where you just have it. Like, I don't know any other way to say it. You have it. And I can feel that in someone when I'm speaking to them. And I was like, what you had— we were talking about this, I think, before the show too— like, what you had done, just kind of figuring it out on your own, was amazing. Yeah. You're like, what the heck? Absolutely amazing.

You just figured this stuff out on your own? Like, yeah, I did what I had to do.

Yeah. But I think that's something else where there's so much information available today in terms of how you can build your brand. Again, there's 8 billion ways you can do it— podcasts, videos, social media, email, speaking. What you see one person doing isn't necessarily going to be the right fit for you. So, someone, I think it would be very helpful for them too to tap into what are my gifts and talents? What flows easily for me? Do I love speaking? Do I love— if so, like, look at getting a podcast, right? Or video. Am I better at writing? Lean into that gift. So, I don't think there has to be a right or a wrong way. I think so much of it is about alignment and finding your flow and how you can best give your gifts. Like, I love speaking. I could do this all day long with you. If I had to go write a blog behind a desk every day, it would be— I could do it, but it wouldn't be fun, right?

Yeah.

It's not like my favorite thing. So I think find what you're good at and find where your people are and then lean in on as generously as possible, sharing as frequently and consistently as possible as well.

So, oh, that's so good because I think so many people are like, oh, well, I have to do it all. I have to be a speaker and I have to do a podcast and I have to like do what comes naturally, what you love doing.

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Then the other one piece that I would add is don't be afraid to sell. This is what's like, it could be easy to hide behind, oh, I did an Instagram Live today or I did a YouTube Live or I did this like, Tell people how they can buy with you. Again, be sold on you. Be your own best ambassador. So, whether that's directing people to a free call, I've got a woman in our community who she's launching her own coaching business and she was like, I've got to build up all of these funnels and this crazy expensive website and do this thing and that thing before I can start selling. And I was like, no, you don't. No, you don't. Like, we did multi-six figures in one of my signature coaching programs before we ever launched a nice website. And it was all just getting on Zoom, sharing free trainings, directing people to a call, using PayPal as checkout. Like, you can make the money you want to make, and it doesn't have to be fancy. I would say, like, someone could look at your show and get intimidated and say, I've got to do that to be able to be successful. I've got to invest a ton of money to be successful. Yeah, no, you don't. Like, you can do that at some point, but you can be making money delivering your gifts and services depending on what they are. Right. Of course, there's the logistics. I'm kind of talking here if someone's coach, thought leader, trainer, speaker, but you don't have to have all these fancy bells and whistles to be able to do that too. So I just, I see people sometimes getting caught up in all the details and bells and whistles. You don't need that to be successful. Yeah.

Well, you know what? That's interesting. You're saying that. I know we're— oh my goodness, we're running out of time. I could talk to you all day. But even like at my last— so I have an annual event, the Unstoppable Success Summit, every year. And, you know, people are always talking about selling from stage and I'm like, oh, I feel so uncomfortable selling from stage. Like, I don't want to do that. And my friend Brooke Hemingway and Rachel Luna were like, hey, we want to get up on stage and sell your mastermind for you. They got up on stage and they were like, oh my gosh, you guys are crazy not to be in her mastermind. And Rachel was like, you guys come up here, the first people that come up here. And I had like 8 people that came up on stage that bought my mastermind right away. And so it was very easy. Like they were selling it. How does somebody get more comfortable selling their own product? Like especially from stage? Because I was like, oh, I don't want to sell anything. You know what I mean?

Yeah.

Now I know that my mastermind, I know that that it can change people's lives. So it's gotten easier for me because I'm like, I know exactly what I can do for that person and to move them and level up their business and their life. But it was so much easier when I had my friends come up and do it for me. How do you get more comfortable selling yourself or your services?

Yeah, I mean, I think everyone has to stumble through a lot of awkward experiences too. It's easy to sit here again and say, oh, it's so easy to sell yourself. I have had probably every awkward selling experience someone would dread that has helped me get confidence.

Really?

Yeah. But so that's part of it, right?

It's like those experiences, they help develop your confidence, your courage.

Yeah. So it's okay if it feels awkward. It's okay if you don't like— just know that anyone who does something well, like I heard a mentor say as well, like any great musician that you listen to, they hit a lot of wrong notes before they became a great musician. So the same is true for everything in life.

And we—

and that's okay. But I would go back to getting sold on And for me, part of that too is what I mentioned before, which is I view myself as an ambassador, like as a channel for this work to come through. And I— for me, it's spiritual connection. So I believe that this is God, Spirit, Universe working through me to help people.

Mm-hmm.

And— but again, I didn't— I didn't have that level of consciousness at the beginning. So it took a while to get here and to not make it so personal. But start really focusing on your clients and the transformation that you're creating for them. And maybe you don't have any clients yet.

You know what? That is, that's it. Just what you said. Because when I'm trying, if I make it about me, then it's not going to work. But if I focus on, well, I know how I can help this person and this person and this person, it's easy.

Yeah, exactly.

It's easy and I could just talk about it and I can do it. So you're exactly right.

That's it. Yeah. I started just paying attention to women in our community and noticing not just in their lives how they were transforming, but then the stories they would share about their kids and how they saw their kids elevating and shifting and raising up their self-concept. And their mom would say something, you know, a limiting belief, and the kid would be like, Mom, you know that's not true about you. And they would have that moment of awareness of like, Oh my gosh, me changing, it's starting to create a ripple effect to my kids, to my loved ones, to people around me. And so, for me, I started really just paying attention to that. And that, for me, was kind of the start of the awareness of, oh my gosh, this is so much bigger than me. And so, what I would say is for anyone listening, just trusting that that desire in you to serve, whatever that is, if you're a coach, a mentor, a thought leader, a speaker, whatever you're industry is, know that the only reason that's there is because there are people who need it and not from anyone else, but they need it from you. And that the ripple effect is going to be far beyond just you. It's going to be their kids, their family, their loved ones. So, we almost have to get out of our own way and just step up and be available to serve. And you can't serve until someone buys. Like, it's at its most fundamental level. Can people get a lot out of free content?

Yeah. Yes.

But if they want to get transformation, they need to be in your energy, right? They need to invest in themselves. And that is the highest level of service. So to me, it's all about getting out of our own way and being available to be connected in service to the people we're meant to serve.

Oh, that is so good. Well, what is the best way? So first of all, I want that free gift you were talking about. Yeah.

Yeah.

So we want to talk about that free gift. So we want to make sure we put that in the show notes. But also, how's the best way for people to get in touch with you if they want to mentor with you or coach with you or be in your energy? What's the best way for people to reach you?

Yeah, absolutely. So we have a really beautiful deep dive training on those 4 quadrants of quantum sales growth. And it's— I reverse engineered the process. How in the world did I go from stuck at the same level of sales for so long to being able to 10x in 6 weeks? And it's this process we now teach called the 4 Quadrants of Quantum Sales Growth. So there's a very deep dive training you can take. And we've got it at elisearcher.com/yourname, Amberly Lago. So people can go— Did you hear that? Say that again.

Just say that again.

elisearcher.com/amberlylago. So they can go there and they can get the download and get the free training. That's so special.

Oh my goodness.

Yep. And so I highly encourage people to take And go deep into the training there. And then I'm @EliseArcher on all social. Podcast is She Sells Radio. And you have been a beautiful guest on my show.

And listen to her show.

Oh my gosh, it was so powerful. It was so, so powerful. So would love to connect further with anyone that this message resonates with. And I so appreciate you having me here.

Oh, thank you so much for being here. And you guys take a screenshot. Like, take a picture, tag us. I always share whenever you tag, and I just appreciate you being on the show. Thank you so much. Thank you, Amberly. It's been beautiful. Thank y'all for tuning in.

I'll see you next week.