It's Ok to Be Different with Olyasha Novozhylova

Welcome to True Grit and Grace, a podcast designed to empower you to claim your resilience and thrive through life's challenges. I am Amberly Lago, a mindset coach, fitness expert and bestselling author. Each week, I'll dive deep with the world's brightest thought leaders and elite performers to share tangible tools and practical advice to inspire you to keep your eyes on the prize and forge ahead. So get ready to conquer your fears, heal any trauma, lead with your heart, and elevate your life with grit and grace. Hi there.

Welcome to True Grit and Grace Podcast. I'm Amberly Lago, and I have someone so special on the show today. She is a legend, a superstar, someone I really look up to and admire for her journey and all that she has done. Olaysha, I know some people call you Olya. I just like, I'm so honored to have you here. She's the founder of Not Basic Blonde. She's a model. She's a blogger. She's a podcaster. She's has one of the top podcasts out there and has had guests on like Ed Mylett, Jamie Kern Lima. I got to be on the show. I was so excited to be on your podcast. But you have millions of followers. You get hundreds of thousands of views on one post. And I'd love to get into your entrepreneurial journey and all that you, all the struggles to success where you've made it today. So thank you so much for being here. And did I mention she's an author? She sent me her book. Did I say that? You're— she's an author of a children's book. So thank you for being here.

Yeah, thank you so much. Like, so honored to be your guest as well because you inspire me every day with your posts and everything you do, especially with your motivational speeches too. And my journey of success began A long time ago because I came to the US when I was 17 and my mom was mail-order bride.

But now, where did you come from? What— where did you grow up?

So I was born in Ukraine, but it's eastern part of Ukraine. And but I'm Russian, so I speak Russian. It was my first language and that's where I came from.

That's amazing. And you were only 17. And when you got here, did you speak English at all?

No, it was like I could read and write, but in school in Russia and Ukraine, they teach you like mostly British English. So—

Really? And then I have to say, I'm so impressed that you actually graduated from George State University with a BBA. I'm blown away because I didn't go to college, and I'm so happy that my oldest daughter just got accepted to Yale. And so You know, I had a chance to go to college, but instead, I went after my dreams of being a dancer. And my family was a little disappointed that I chose dance and that career over school. But you have done it all. You've got the education. And then you had the successful blog and then did modeling. Is that what inspired you to start and found your brand?

So my family definitely pushed me to get education because they did not believe in modeling and they told me that's not a real job. I must have an education. So I just went to school and I still done modeling kind of like on the side. But what really inspired me to create my blog is I was bullied in school, as I was introducing that in my children's book. And that's what inspired me to write it as well. So I was bullied in school for fashion and even like on On the last day of school when I was graduating from— at that time we had 11 grades. So 11th grade, my principal announced in the whole school that, what are we going to do without our role model, the fashion role model, Olya? She made fun of me. And of course, everyone at school— I was tall and I was always dressed up pretty bright and fashionable. I would get like a lot of bullies, you know. And what inspired me to create Not Basic Blonde is that Not Basic Blonde kind of speaks out for being like unique, not basic, not to be afraid to express your personality, not to be afraid to show your talents to the world. Don't let anyone dim your sparkle.

Yeah, well, you know what, I think in situations like that, you can let that crush you, Or you can take that as a way to, for me, I was bullied too as a kid for being too skinny. I was called names. Like I was called Annie Anorexic even though I wasn't anorexic and Bulimic Girl and all these things. And I used that to kind of fuel me to go, you know what? I'm going to prove it to myself that I am going to make it as a dancer. And, you know, I had so many people that were like, Good luck, girl. Good luck moving to Hollywood. You'll never make it. What was it in you, do you think, that— did you use that as fuel to motivate you even more in those circumstances when you felt bullied? How did you climb? For me, because it stings, it hurts. How did you process those feelings and start to move forward and go after your dreams despite the bullying?

I didn't really I mean, of course I was kind of upset about all that, and I had to even fight in school. That I'm very quiet. I'm very— I mean, I'm not super quiet, but I'm very calm. And to get in fight with me, it takes a lot. But the girls really pushed my buttons, so I had to grab one girl's hair. And after that, no one touched me. Wow.

You know what? I, I love that you share that because You are the sweetest. We DM each other all the time. And I feel like I've known you forever because, you know, I first met you when I was a guest on your show. And then we've just kept the conversation going. And you are always so kind. And to have that visualization of you pulling someone's hair, it's like unreal. But, you know, I think it's even scarier when someone's very soft-spoken.

Yeah.

spoken and always nice, when you push their button and you see that side of them come out, it's like, whoa, look out. I mean my husband always says, okay, don't go Texas on me because he knows I have like, you don't want to push that button.

Yeah.

But I think that's what it takes sometimes when you're being bullied. I know that's what it took for me was when I finally stood up to the people who were bullying me, that's when they not only backed down but they started like being nice to me and ended up being my friends after all of that. Just standing up to the bully. Sometimes they're just like really scared or insecure themselves, and they try to make themselves feel better by bullying you. And do you ever see any of the people that bullied you in school and you're like, look at me now? Do you ever see anyone?

Yeah, so I mean, they're all back home, back in Ukraine. I actually found my principal on Facebook and I messaged her and I shared with her everything I do now. And she said, I'm so proud of you. I was like, well, thank you.

Wow, that must have felt really good though. Yeah, it's things that happen in our childhood really affect so much of us. Sometimes we don't even realize how much it affects us. But it does affect, those feelings we have affect everything in our life, our relationships, what we choose to do with our careers. So I listen to your podcast all the time. And I'm amazed at like all the guests that you have on. Like Ed Mylett is one of my favorites. You have some amazing guests on your show. Who has been one of your favorite guests that you've learned from the most? Because you have athletes, Entrepreneurs, bestselling authors. Who's someone that you've had on that you really learned a lot from?

You know, I can't really say like one person because everyone I have, they all have unique story and every story brings something to you. Like every story speaks some kind of truth and some kind of message. So every guest is always, like I always say, I always pick guests that are unique and they have story because, you know, I learn from everyone. And it's amazing that so many people I've had, and every one of them, like, benefited in such a great way, my audience and me, that I can only say one person because they all have been so great.

Yeah. Well, when you approach these guests to be on their show, because I know there's so many podcasts now, I think during COVID So many people started a podcast. Yours is a new podcast and you already have hundreds and hundreds of reviews, which says a lot about your podcast, y'all. So those reviews help. If you're listening right now, please write me a review. I'm sometimes, I'm like, how do you get reviews? And I had somebody say, you ask for them. And I'm like, okay, I don't ask for much, but yeah, if you're listening, please write a review. Send me a screenshot and I'll send you a gift. There you go. Bribery works every time. But I love a lot of the interviews that you've had, even the one I was listening today. And you've had a lot of doctors on the show as well that I've learned from. How do you go about asking a lot of the people that are the guests on your show to be on the show? Do you send them an email? Do you DM them? Or how does that work?

So many of them reach out to me, like their PR companies or they're just managers, whatever, reach out to me. They want to be on my show, but some of them I personally reach out to, like my favorite ones, and I just DM them. I follow them, I like their posts, I comment on their posts, I get their attention and I invite them and then they want to be my guests.

Yeah. Well, you know what? That, that's something very important you just shared. It's the way that you do it. And I know for you and I that we engage on each other's posts. So we get to know each other and then you DM me. And I think that's so important is building the relationship and that connection and showing that you really care. And you really do that. You really, I can see, go all out. And you just recovered. You had COVID and pneumonia. And I wanted to ask you, I mean, thank goodness that you're feeling better. And to look at you right now, you would never even know that you were sick. But I think it takes a lot of grit to be an entrepreneur.

Yeah.

And during that time where you weren't feeling good, a lot of people wouldn't know unless they really looked into your post and could see that you, you know, I saw your post where you weren't feeling well. How did you, did you take a break from everything or do you have systems in place? Or as an entrepreneur, sometimes I feel like I don't have time for a break. I work nonstop. And I'm working on that. I'm working on taking, trying to take one day a week off. What did you do during that time?

That was a really scary time for me because I am young. I'm not overweight. I don't have any health issues. And I had it in the hardest form you can get. I got pneumonia and COVID altogether. I've been in the hospital 3 times at that time. I mean, luckily, I wasn't put under ventilator or any of that because I was monitoring everything closely, like my oxygen and, um, like, you know, liquids— I mean, liquid intake and all of that. But it was scary time because I was misdiagnosed. And, um, that's why it took me a longer recovery because they did not want to do even X-ray. They were like, your lungs are clear, you don't need an X-ray. I was like, no, I do. And I insisted for them to actually do an X-ray for me. And when they did it, they said, oh, you have pneumonia. And oh, you need to take antibiotics, or you don't need to take antibiotics. So they—I know why now because many people died from COVID here because they tell you to stay at home while you don't feel good. I mean, till you don't feel well. Then they're like, when you have difficulty breathing, then you go to hospital. When you have difficulty breathing at that time, at that point, it's already almost too late. That's why so many people die, and it's like so crazy here because they. tell you, take it, stay at home and take Tylenol for your fever. I've been taking Tylenol for so many days in a row at that time, and my stomach was totally out of control. I was feeling so sick from taking that medicine and just like, you know, and having fever so many days. Obviously, I needed antibiotics at that time, and they would not give me antibiotics. I had to go to other doctors to get antibiotics because I felt like I needed it, and I was asking for it. And my treatment and like my recovery went so much longer because I was not like misdiagnosed. And of course, when I was feeling that— I mean, terribly.

Well, you know what, I think that's— I just have to really say thank goodness that you were your own advocate and you were like, no, I am not feeling good, I need an x-ray. Because a lot of people Don't. I ended up being in ICU at one point because I didn't feel well. I had a kidney infection. I went septic. And I had been going to this one doctor and telling him, I don't feel well. I don't feel well. And they're like, well, you know, we'll just wait and see. Take these over-the-counter homeopathic things. I'm like, no, really. I know my body and I don't feel well.

Yeah.

And now I don't screw around when I start feeling like I'm prone to like kidney infections because I've— and I have kidney stones. I go straight to urgent care. And I'm like, okay, we need to do some tests. Something's going on. So thank goodness you were your own advocate because a lot of people need to hear that. Like you have to stand up for yourself and use your voice. And I think maybe even You being bullied as a kid and learning to stand up for yourself and pull that girl's hair. You had to like stand up for yourself and be like, no, doctor, listen.

Yeah.

I need help. And how long were you sick?

2 weeks. But 3 weeks, I was so weak. Like I had no energy at all. I lost so much weight. And, you know, past few months, I had a lot of anxiety and panic attacks. I mean, now I'm getting better at it, but I had bad relationship with food. Like, I've been talking— actually, I'm talking about this on my podcast too, that I had no appetite. Like, I had so many things going on, and one of the family members had— that was diagnosed with cancer, and then he passed away. And all of these events, like, and on the top of running my business and doing everything, so I had no appetite. Food did not excite me. I was making myself to eat 3 times a day, and I lost so much weight prior to COVID. And when I got COVID, I lost even more weight.

Yeah.

And it was like, my mom was scared for me, and everybody was kind of scared because they were like, at some point when I was really bad, like feeling really bad, my mom thought I'm gonna die because like she thought she will take me to ER and wouldn't come back. That's how scary it was for me. And like, many people think COVID is a joke. Maybe if you don't get like any side effects with it, maybe because some people had it very light, some people not. But you know, yeah, it was hard.

Yeah, well, you know, let's, let's talk about a little bit because I think so many people, especially during COVID turned to either eating or their relationship with food. I know when I get really stressed, I have no appetite. And even when I eat, I just start to lose weight. And not in a good way. Like in a, it looks like an unhealthy way. And so let's talk about your, if we can, if you don't mind talking about your relationship with food a little bit.

Yeah.

How did you You said you had to make yourself eat. Is that because of the, the anxiety and like the panic attacks you were having?

Yeah, because I— when I'm nervous, I can't eat. And I was nervous a lot, and I was going through so many things at the same time. And yeah, that's, that's what caused it the most.

Well, how— I've definitely had anxiety, and I had a panic attack. I had no idea what it was, and I was traveling and I was by myself. And thank goodness these 2 ladies, I was at a little coffee shop to get something to eat before I got on the train. And thank goodness these 2 ladies looked over at me and they were like, are you okay? Because I guess I went ghost white. You feel like you have like an elephant on your chest. But then I felt dizzy and I blacked out for a minute and my hands were tingling. And then I couldn't breathe. And I didn't know until later that's like, it was a panic attack.

Yeah.

And it's been finding ways to cope with anxiety. And I think that's something a lot of people don't talk about being an entrepreneur is there's a lot of stress. I mean besides the fact that you had family issues, you were getting over COVID, thank goodness. But just the pressure of keeping your podcast going, Making a post for social media, engaging on social media, keeping your blog going. Are those some of the things that were causing the stress and the panic attacks?

No, those were not really. But, you know, one of the— I have an amazing coach and she told me, now you have to put everything aside. You have to do you now. Like, now you have to think about your recovery. You come first because When you're not there, nothing will happen. So you have to think about your health first. I stayed off social media for a couple days, 3 days maybe. I had to reschedule so many things, but it kind of put me behind because I have so many plans going now. I have so many ongoing projects that are in the works and that are supposed to be released very soon and announced, but I couldn't do anything and I was just laying there talking to my friends on the phone. And it was a miserable time for me that week, you know, and I still had to find energy to do the work. And my podcast, I gave up for that week and I said, guys, sorry, I need some time to recover and my podcast will be back when I'm recovered. But still, I was doing it even though I wasn't fully recovered. In some of the latest episodes, you can hear my voice was not in the best shape. I still had nasal voice and everything because I— at some points, one of the episodes I was actually recording when I was just getting sick. And how COVID happened to me is I woke up in the middle of the night and I had a huge hot flash. The hot flash that I went Pale, and I almost passed out. It made me so sick. Next day I woke up like, and I was feeling like somebody beat me up, and I had no energy at all. I had to record podcast episodes. I was like, oh my God. And I had to like get my mom and somebody, I was like, sit with me so I can get through this because I have like no energy. I don't know like what's going on. And next day I had fever. Next day it started. Wow.

Well, there's a couple of things you said. Like you definitely have the grit to like keep pushing through. And then thank goodness you have a coach that reminded you to give yourself grace and to rest and to take care of yourself. And, you know, when we have our health, we want so many things. And, but when we don't have our health, we want one thing.

Yeah.

And that is to have our health and feel better because without that, we can't do anything else. And so I think I've learned the hard way. Like, you know, when I went septic and I had 2 doctors that came in and they were like, if you would've waited one more day, you would've died. And that really scared me more than anything in my life has scared me. And it really got me to think, okay, what are my priorities? And I have to put myself on my to-do list. I think it's so important to put your health and yourself on your list so you can do so many things. And I know you have so many projects in the works and you released your children's book. And thank you so much, by the way, for sending me your book with a package of like, it looked like little Skittles, and it was so cute. And, um, my— I gave the book to my niece. She loves unicorns. But can you tell me a little bit about your book? Tell everybody what your book is called and who it's for and what inspired you to write it.

Sure. And also, I want to add, like, to the previous question, you know, if my Coach wouldn't tell me to give grace to myself and let it be for a few days, I wouldn't do it because I'm so hard on myself all the time. I keep pushing even I can't do it, but I keep pushing. And what I've learned through my podcasts and through, like, you know, motivational speakers and others, that you have to pause sometimes because you can't produce content, you can't create if you're exhausted. So, like, I learned that.

It's so true. And I'm the same way. I push and push and push. Just like the other day, I had a magazine article to write. And I had been writing content all day and recording. And I had done that day, given a motivational speech at the University of Adversity Summit. And my brain, like it was pretty fried. And I was like, I can't be creative unless I take a break.

Yeah.

And like go into nature. So I think it's so important for people to have mentors or coaches or masterminds, people that can remind you to take care of yourself when we're so hard on ourself. You know? That serves us well until it doesn't. It's like it's good to push and push, but we have to really pause before we can start and be creative. So I love that you shared that. And Speaking of pushing and going for it, how long did it take you to write your book?

Well, it was kind of like overnight idea because I had that idea so fast and I just sat down and I just wrote it. I mean, editing, producing, and creating the book and illustrations, it took way longer going back and forth, you know, and all that and formatting. So that took Longer, maybe months or so. But actual writing process, because I had an idea, it took me basically probably 30 minutes.

You are kidding me.

No, because I just got that idea. And I usually get my kind of brilliant ideas on Saturday nights. So I got that idea, I sat down and I wrote it. And that was it.

Wow. Okay, I have to know, why do you think you get those brilliant ideas on Saturday night?

I guess that's what I want to know. Because I am relaxed, I guess. Because when I'm—

my mind in the pause mode, that's when you have time to really listen to your heart.

Exactly. Yeah.

And I think that you are very in tune with your heart and the universe and messages. And I think that when we give ourselves a little time to pause, we see those things. Like, I remember you had messaged me about seeing the butterfly in my story.

Yeah, it was crazy because I, like, you know, I was reading Super Attractor by Gabby Bernstein, and I keep going and reading that book many times because that kind of, like, always keeps me— gives me, like, kind of peace of mind because—

I love her. I love her work.

Yeah. And The chapter I read that was about like, if you're not sure about something, ask universe to give you a sign. And I was like, okay, universe, I have such and such, give me a sign. I want to see butterflies. I was like, where am I going to see butterflies? I was like, I don't know. And I'm going to Instagram, going to your story, and I see butterflies. I was like, oh my God.

I have goosebumps right now because I remember, I mean, Our butterflies had just hatched. Our caterpillars had just turned into butterflies that day. And so we had put, my daughter and I had put them in our story. And I remember you messaging me and I was like, I totally believe in stuff like that. I really think that, I call those like God wink moments when we see something or, you know, we hear something that we're supposed to, we really need to hear or supposed to hear.

Yeah.

So I loved that story and I loved, I loved your book. And I'm just so glad that you're feeling better, um, and took some time to just get better. Do you take a day off or do you work 7 days a week?

So now I'm trying to be not as hard on myself. I try to be like, go easy on the weekends and kind of, I don't do maybe posts on the weekends, but It's not always that easy to stay away from social media.

I know. I just have to ask, do you look at your insights on social media?

Yeah, I do.

Do you know how much time you spend on social media?

Oh God, no, I don't look actually at the time because I just look at the general time, you know, when your phone shows you how many hours you spend on the phone. But actually—

Okay, I have to know, how many hours do you spend on the phone? Because my daughter just busted me. For like, she's like, Mom, you had 70 hours of screen time last week.

And I have 8 hours probably a day, sometimes 6, but a lot of it is emails and giving direction to my team and to others, like, you know, about projects and everything else. Like, I try not to spend more than maybe an hour on Instagram a day.

Yeah, that's good.

It eats up your time so fast.

It does. Like it's so important. And I want to respond to every single person that comments on my posts because I know that when I felt, when I was really struggling and I would comment on somebody's page that was really, it was meaningful to me. And when they responded back, it just, it meant so much. So I try to respond to people, but it's not always easy. And it's I think it's important to look at the time you spend on something and see, is this moving the needle forward on my business or is this just sucking up my time?

Important on social media, don't consume content, just produce content. Because when you consume it, you're just comparing yourself to others and it's the worst you can do because comparison kills the progress.

Yes, I love that. Produce, produce, produce. And I see that a lot on TikTok where There are a lot more consumers than there are producers. Now, are you on TikTok?

Yeah, I'm on TikTok too. Yeah.

Okay. I got to make sure I follow you there. And I know I follow you on Clubhouse. How has it been on Clubhouse for you? Are you getting on Clubhouse?

You know, I haven't been because it takes so much time and I was busy with other things so much. Like TikTok, I have mixed feelings about it because when I post the cute videos, they don't get much interaction. And I've noticed that on TikTok, you just have to be like raw and real. Then you can get some comments and you can get some interaction. Otherwise, just people keep scrolling because, you know, so many women are jealous about other women. And like, when I see pretty girl, I like her post or I comment. I don't mind.

Yeah.

But not all women are the same way. And, you know, most of them, they don't even comment. They see you, they see what you do, they copy you, but they don't comment. They don't You know, they don't.

I just got back from a women's empowerment summit. And the love in the room that was there from women, it was so beautiful. And I think, I'm hoping that we are on the rise as women to stop this comparison and lock arms and realize that when we do things together, we're stronger. And I think that's really a mentality of, you know, an abundance mentality. You know, if there's something I can help you with, I'm like, let me help you with it. And if there's something you can help me with, I'm like, oh my gosh, thank you. Because there's enough for all of us. And I think that when we look at it as there's enough for everyone, and when it's your time to shine, you're going to shine. And when it's her time to shine, she's going to shine. But I'm hoping it makes— but it is on social media. I think a lot of people get caught up in comparison. We're only human. I've done that. I've gotten caught up and going, oh my gosh, look at what they're doing. Oh, I'm not doing enough. Or, you know what I mean? And so I think you have a healthy, you know, respect for your time that you spend there and what you produce. So I'm going to remember that. Produce, produce, produce. Stop consuming and produce. Only like consume people that you know you're going to get inspired From, from them. Yeah. What are some of the projects that you're working on that we can look forward to seeing? I'm excited to know.

Usually I don't disclose anything until it's actually out.

I hear you. I'm— I hear you. I get that. It's kind of like when I was pregnant, I didn't tell anybody till I was like 6 months pregnant. I'm like, okay, I think I can tell you now. I'm pregnant. Well, we'll be looking forward to that. I mean you've worked with amazing companies like, you know, oh my gosh, Cartier, Drybar, Too Faced. You've been featured on Yahoo Finance, Thrive. And you just, the list goes on. You just, it just goes on and on. And y'all, tell us where people can find you on social media and also your podcast and website. I really want people to check you out because you always have such amazing things to share on your Instagram. You're one of my go-to pages that I'm like, I got to check out what she's saying today or who she's having on her show.

Oh, thank you. So you can find my book on Amazon. It's called Cutie the Unicorn: It's Okay to Be Different. And it's also— you can find me on Instagram. It's @notbasicblonde_ And my podcast, it's Not Basic Blonde Podcast, available on all the major podcast platforms. And on Instagram, it's NBB Podcast. And my blog, notbasicblonde.com.

Thank you. And yeah, your book is like the perfect gift. Such a great message, an empowering message for, for kids. But I read it, my 13-year-old read it, and now my niece who is 8 has it. And so yeah, I just— is there anything that you want to share about how to be resilient as an entrepreneur, as a model, as a blogger, as a podcaster? What is one thing that you do to keep moving forward?

You know, I have kind of people around me that help me, like my mom and others, but it's definitely hard because you have to always keep believing in yourself and never give up because when you have low self-esteem or when your self-esteem gets not at the point where you're not feeling yourself, that's when you can't really build anything. And you have to make sure you're feeling good and your best. And if you have toxic people in your life or toxic relationships, you have to to cut it off because that's what's always holding you back, and that's what's always holding you back from success. And like always, what I've learned in my life, it's I never give up. I keep going, and I'm just being persistent. And when you're being persistent, it helps and it works. And, you know, Sometimes there are so many times and obstacles you have to overcome when you're being an entrepreneur, but you have to have resilience and you have to have courage to get up and go. Even if you fall, get up and go back, get back on the track.

Yeah, so yeah, that really just hits home for me that it does take persistence and it takes courage. It takes getting up again and again and learning from your failures. And one thing that I really love that you shared too is it's about the people that you surround yourself with and getting rid of the toxic people. And I think that goes for not just people in your life but people that you follow on social media. If there's someone—

Yeah.

that makes you feel bad or they're just toxic, unfollow them. You don't need to see that. So I just appreciate you and all you share. And I hope that we can see each other in person sometime. I would love that. And thank you. I know how busy you are with your, everything that you have going on. So just, I really appreciate you taking the time to share your experience, your strength, and your hope. And I'm so glad you're feeling better.

Thank you so much for inviting me. And I just like, I'm thrilled because you are my biggest motivation and inspiration too, because you always produce a lot of content and your speeches and everything you do is very inspiring. So your posts always, sometimes when you post something on your page and I go to your page and like, that's the message I need to hear today.

Oh, thank you. Thank you. Most of the time I post something that I need to hear or tell myself. I'm like, I need to hear this today.

I do too. I do too. You know, I sometimes post it, but I was like, okay, I'm telling this to people and I'm telling this to myself too.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I adore you and I hope you see more butterflies too.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

Thanks so much for joining us this week on True Grit and Grace Podcast. If you like it, please rate it or share it with your friends. That would help too. If you're not yet on the newsletter list, come over to amberlylago.com and jump on it. While you're there, you can grab a free downloadable gratitude journal, and you might Just want to check out my book or even check out my monthly motivational membership. Thanks again for tuning in, and we'll see you next week.