Rewire Your Mind: How Neuroplasticity Helps You Heal from Trauma and Reclaim Confidence!

Hey, beautiful souls. Welcome to Reclaim Your Inner Rockstar, the space for high-capacity leaders who lead boldly yet often feel overstimulated beneath the surface. I'm Amy Robinson, aromapsychologist and cognitive coach with more than 25 years of helping others find emotional clarity through scent and science. My work began when I realized scent could instantly shift my thoughts and regulate my entire inner world. And I knew women like me needed access to that same power. Each week you will receive grounded tools and conversations that help you steady your nervous system and think more clearly. Are you ready to feel like yourself again? Then you're in the right place.

This topic is really interesting. The topic is really bold. You can change your brain. What do you think that means, to change your brain? Do you think that means that we immediately change the way we think and believe and be. I know I'm in that transition period in my life where my muscles are changing in my body, and the workout I used to do at 20 years old no longer works for me. All that heavy, intense cardio that I used to do for so many years is something that if I were to do it now, I would probably pull a hamstring, hurt a knee, or something. So we adjust, always transitioning the way that we work our muscles and our body. And when we do work our muscles, it is always encouraged for women our age do lifting weights. We lift weights. They may not be 100 pounds or 50 pounds, but they are weights to lift, and we do that because we want to keep our muscle mass over time. So a muscle that gets worked out grows, and it builds lean muscle and healthy muscle. It's the same type of thing with changing our brain and neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity means the expansion of the brain, working to help it grow and in a certain area in our life. Just like our muscles grow bigger and get stronger, our brain can do the same thing with repetitive use. The brain is made up of millions and billions of nerve cells. They're called neurons, and they all connect together through a network of over a trillion tiny branches. They're called neurotransmitters. They communicate with each other. These little pathways that are grown. Think about, I don't know if you've ever seen those sciency sci-fi movies where there's an underground, you know, community and you see all these little roadways and you can turn left or right or any other way and you can get to your destination that way, but the goal is always to get the quickest, most straight way. With these chemicals shooting through pathways, neurotransmitters are responsible for every step you take. Your heart beating, all your thoughts and emotions. These things happen so quickly, we don't even know it. Our brain is amazingly made. When we work that pathway a certain way, it becomes well used. This is what happens when it comes to trauma. Many of our neuropathways and our neurotransmitters that communicate have been created in a very intense and unsafe way. And our brain, the whole reason that we have our brain is to think and to care for us. Its whole purpose is to keep us safe. So when we've experienced a high level of trauma, chronic or complex trauma, those neurotransmitters that communicate one way, their way to keep us safe is, is something that's grown in unhealthy circumstances. These chemicals that run through our brain, those thoughts and emotions are not the healthiest because our thought processes were developed in a traumatic state. The reason why it's important to understand The science-y part is because we can work to help the brain and make it stronger. That's where cognitive work comes in. When you repeat a behavior, an action, an emotion, a thought over and over again, that pathway responsible for sending this signal becomes stronger and it becomes easier and easier and habits are formed. They say usually it takes 21 days to form a new habit. It's not easy stepping into something new, but once you go down that route, you're starting to create a new habit. It's also how emotional triggers are created and negative patterns of thought and behavior are formed. Whether the outcome is good or bad, whatever you do repeatedly changes the physical workings of the neural connections in your brain. What's important to know is that for many years scientists believe that the brain loses its ability to grow and change early in life, but they now have proof that even older brains can change by developing more connections and strengthening those wires. We can change the way we think, the way we feel, and the way that we are in our life. And it doesn't matter, we don't have to be young or old. Those of us who have suffered and experienced chronic and complex trauma, the majority of the women I work with, come to me thinking they don't know what is going on. They have, they cannot pinpoint the, the moment where their life shifted and became what it was. They've learned to mask and deep down inside they're agonizing emotionally. They are frustrated because they can't understand what their brain is trying to tell them. They can't translate what's going on in their mind. That's where cognitive work comes in. A lot of people think intelligence is fixed. We're born with a certain intelligence level. The world in general, the whole academic world, there's many who are very intelligent, but they're not wise. There's no wisdom there. Their brain has been wired to understand intellect and academia, but they haven't connected with their emotions and thoughts. Beings are very unhappy, unfulfilled, frustrated because they haven't connected with their thoughts and emotions. Just as intelligence is important, important. It's also important to build emotional and thoughtful awareness. That's something that's lacking and can create depression and anxiety on a whole different level. Think about going to school and trying to do well. If you weren't, you were shamed or bullied for being different. That creates its own level of trauma. Trauma can come from many avenues and affect people in so many different ways. But here's the truth. The truth is that while there are minor variations between people and their innate predispositions, the factor that contributes to a person's level of intelligence at any age is their exposure to information and experience combined with the amount of time that they have spent learning. So intelligence can be grown just like any physical activity. I consider myself a highly intelligent person, but I've learned that intelligence through a very non-traditional approach. I'm certified in several aspects of things. Over the years, I've been certified in many different things and have grown in my education, but I don't have a master's degree, nor do I need one to get the work I need or to make the income life that I have. So I've learned that it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know things. Life can be so much more rewarding when we understand these things. How does that play when it comes to our confidence? When we start to learn and become aware of what our thoughts and emotions are, we are able to see what we contribute and bring to a table. In turn, we can grow grow in our mindset. That is where the real beauty lies. Think about different people in different jobs. For example, people who are cab drivers. My husband, he's a professional driver. He's been one for over 20 years. I feel immensely safe with him in the vehicle. His response on the road is instant. It's amazing. He's developed those skills over time, and he knows everywhere in Atlanta. Like, he can go, he's like, "Oh yeah, I know where that is." He can go to places you've never heard of because of the jobs that he has done over the years. So he has a larger hippocampus, the part of the brain that has to do with spatial memory. It's enlarged because he's used it so many times. Those of us who have suffered trauma have a larger amygdala, which is that those little almond-shaped organs in our brain that have to do— they're the center of emotion and feeling. That means triggers can set us off. Most of it is negative. Our brain is always looking to— every new experience is fearful. Every new thought or stepping into something new is a very scary thing. What I do as a cognitive coach is I help you to train to shift that thinking so that your anxiety can be put at bay. That doesn't mean we're not going to have anxiety. Confidence is not perfection. Perfectionism is an ADHD trait. It's a neurodivergent trait because really the stems of it, according to psychological research, perfectionism is the byproduct of trauma. We try to control every other aspect of our life, which makes us perfectionists overachievers. Our brain makes us want to feel safe, so we feel that's normal until we realize it's not. And then when we do realize it's not, all the emotions come and it affects us and it makes us feel uncomfortable and unsafe. The goal when I work with my clients, especially one-on-one, and the process that takes time to shift the thinking, that growth mindset— what a lot of people find is a misconception of the growth mindset is that we feel we have to have the growth mindset 100% of the time, and that's not true. The growth mindset is allowing our minds to grow, to be able to look at things in a way that helps us to grow in our thinking. There are several common misperceptions that can prevent you from being able to develop a true growth mindset, either because you reject the idea because you feel like a fixed mindset. So a fixed mindset— a fixed mindset is somebody says, I can't do that. No, I'm not smart enough to do that. No, I can't go there. No, yeah, everybody's this way. Or that's more of a fixed mindset. The growth mindset, taking on new challenges, being able to step into things that make you feel a little uncomfortable. Remember, our brain wants us to feel safe at all times. So if somebody's saying, give this a try, you're like, no, I'm not doing that. That doesn't make me feel safe at all. But when we step into something good, how do we know we're not going to love it? I think about it like trying food. Have you ever had a friend say to you, "Here, try this"? I had my aunt, she's like, "Here, try this alligator." And I'm like, "Oh, alligator? What? Are you kidding me?" And she's like, "Just give it a try. You just never know until you try it." When I tried it, I was really impressed with it. It was really good. If I wouldn't have tried it, if I would have stayed in that, "Uh-uh, I can't do that. I don't like it. I won't like it," how would I have known it was good. Difference between fixed mindset and growth mindset. Either you reject the idea because you feel like having a fixed mindset makes you wrong or bad, because you struggle to identify authentic growth mindset from simply the appearance of it. No one is either 100% fixed and 100% growth mindset or growth-oriented. Everyone is on a spectrum between the two. Someone can be fixed in one area of their life such as believing their intelligence is fixed, but have a growth mindset in other areas, such as believing they can develop a singing ability. People's life situation can impact how they view themselves and others. For example, you can have a growth mindset that helps you achieve success within your organization, but then you get promoted to a leadership position and start believing you can't have all the answers and you fall into that fixed mindset. That was just an example. Understanding what the growth mindset is helps us see where we need to grow in our lives. When it comes to somebody who has experienced trauma, their fixed mindset is larger than their growth mindset because they have created a very safe space for themselves, even if it's toxic. They don't grow into that confident person person want to be because they're afraid to step into something new. I use a lot of spiritual timeless principles along with cognitive work to support my clients. Many of them have a strong spiritual perspective in their life, but also have very limiting beliefs within that spiritual perspective, maybe due to emotional trauma, religious trauma, people, you know, of trauma from outside their situation. Trauma is anything we were not able to control in our life that has created a toxic memory in our brain. And so that can be anywhere and with anything. Before I wrap this up, know that I'm here for you to support you. If you feel that you want to have a one-on-one Book of Discovery call, or check out the show notes to see what my programs are, I understand where you are and I understand where you want to be. Once we start to change the way we think, we can start to change the way we live. We can release. We can become the person we want to become. And whatever our goals are, we need more of that in our life, don't we? See you next time!