Anthony Goldner and a co-speaker explain the challenge flag, a communication tool for couples stuck in difficult conversations. Borrowed from NFL rules, it's a physical signal (like raising a dish towel) that pauses the discussion, lets both partners acknowledge they're miserable, and resets the conversation. They used it after quitting their jobs for a real-estate venture that made them both unhappy.
What is the best tool that you guys have let couples know, like, hey, I'm not trying to shut you down right now. We're, I'm just trying to like collaborate and have a good conversation on some type of topic.
The first one is something that we like to call the challenge flag. And I know you guys are Packers fans, so you know all about the challenge flag in the NFL. Like, yep, time out. Let's review the call we made on the field. And so we will use that. Like, we used that after we left our corporate jobs and started a real estate business that we absolutely hated, was making us miserable. We threw the challenge flag to kind of have that conversation and realize that we were both miserable and this was a mistake and what are we going to do about it? And so I like the challenge flag, and sometimes we will literally use like a dish towel or something like, okay, we need to have a conversation, like make it a little light. Like, yeah, I need to have— we need to have a conversation.
