A recorded conversation between Dr. Ken Blanchard and Robert J. Strock about confronting mortality and health challenges. Ken opens with personal anecdotes about surgery and fear; Robert describes relying on spirituality, prayer, and community support during a kidney transplant. He frames his emotional experience as a two-dimensional partnership of fear and faith—both present, creating peace—and emphasizes acceptance of outcomes while remaining committed to life and service.
Robert, you've been, you know, closer to experiencing death than I have, you know, with your kidney and different things that have happened to you. And that whole process of dealing with your own vulnerability, your own immortality, is a really powerful thing. And I just wondered where your spiritual aspect is, because I, you know, I have my hip replaced, and I'm basically a sissy, you know. I mean, you know, I remember one time I cut my hand, you know, cutting the. The turkey down at Margie's Faust, you know, And I'm in the bathroom like this. I didn't even want to look, you know. And so Margie's mother sees the knife on the floor and a little blood. She said, what happened? Oh, Margie says, oh, Ken must have cut himself. He's in the bathroom not wanting to look. You know, I mean, so. I mean, that's. So when I had my hip done, you know, I have really gotten through some friends like Charlie Tremendous Jones and other people, gotten peaceful in my life, that if the Lord called me tomorrow, I would be peaceful, because I have a sense that what's coming after this might even be better than this. I want to be the last one to learn that that's not true. So I feel peaceful. But I also am excited, if I get to stay here, that there are things to do, not just to sit and watch my body deteriorate and all. I really have a sense in the next 20, 25 years, if I got that, that the potential impact I can make in the world is significantly more than what I've done up to this time. So I'm kind of excited about that. But where are you? Because, I mean, you really were really close to that. How did your spirituality help you there?
You know, my spirituality was mixed with everybody. I love spirituality, and it was a time where I really asked everyone to pray for me and to send me just courage and faith and trust and just kind of the love and the trust to know that no matter what happens, that the love and the trust and the faith can still be there. Even if the kidney transplant that I was having didn't work, my prayer was, may I have the courage and faith to deal with whatever happens. And of course, I would like the kidney to work. But I wanted to keep my dedication to being able to be loving and trusting that I could handle even if I had to go on dialysis. And so what happened was I was afraid. And with that fear, it was as if there was this ocean of love around me and trust and peace. And so I had this voice inside Going on, well, of course you're afraid, of course you are. It's perfectly natural to be afraid. And at the same time there was this enormous feeling, not only knowing feeling of trust and love that just allowed the experience to be peaceful. And it sounds like a contradiction, but it was really the emotional state and the trust in the faith were just partners. And it wasn't any kind of a one dimensional experience, it was utterly two dimensional. I don't think I had any times where I was just in fear or just in faith. And so the combination of the two just seemed like it created enormous peace. I didn't have to be purely evolved to have absolute faith. And fear wasn't in any way running the show. And the community of friends, the love that they sent me just, I know, was an overwhelming influence.
And it sounds like that whole process and looking at the faith and the fear and all permitted you to not be as emotionally tied up to the outcome.
Exactly.
And that's what was the peaceful thing for me when I got to the point to say, I can live with the outcome either way. And then that permitted me to take in the love and the other things because I wouldn't say, pray with me, so it's going to be successful. Send me the love so I can send it back to you because I'm going to be all right no matter what.
And whatever part of me feels, or would have felt incredible loss, incredible disappointment, I can still be loved while I'm in the state of loss and disappointment too. And so it wasn't as if I was going to be just love or just faith. I was going to still stay as a human being and I was going to be able to have access to the love. And it was the two together again. Because as I visualized a worst case scenario happening, I didn't have any illusion that I was going to go, yes, I'm now on dialysis. It was going to be, it was going to be a certain element of probably some kind of a depressive feeling for a while. And the faith to know the trust, to know that one leg would move in front of each other and I still was going to be dedicated to the same life that I wanted to live otherwise.
