This webinar excerpt explains the Buddhist metaphor of the "second arrow": the unavoidable first arrow of primary emotional pain (grief, anger, helplessness) and the self-critical reaction to that pain (the second arrow) which produces most suffering. The speaker emphasizes remaining open to primal feelings and learning to care for them; the webinar invites participants to practice this approach.
Do you know what the second arrow means in Buddhist thought? I rarely go there. But the second arrow means that all of us have a first arrow, which is our emotional suffering that can't be avoided. Suffering like grief or sorrow or helplessness or spontaneous anger. But then we have a reaction to it where we don't like ourselves. We are criticizing ourselves. We say, I hate that. I hate that in this person. I hate this in myself. That second reaction is the second arrow, and that second arrow causes the majority of our suffering. You want to remain open to your original feelings, but see that the story you tell yourself about the feelings, the criticism that you tell yourself about the feelings, is the main source of suffering. We can handle our primal original feelings if we learn to care for them. That's what we're going to be doing in the webinar. Come join us.
