A first-person YouTube monologue by Betsy Guerra about losing her daughter and intentionally choosing a path toward happiness. The speaker describes a pivotal moment the day after her daughter's death when she decided to honor her child through love, gratitude, and service rather than prolonged suffering. She recounts the painful process of grieving but says that over years (an eight-year process referenced) she has arrived at deep, transcendent love and states she is now the happiest woman on earth.
Chapters
And I remember the day after my daughter passed. I was in my walk in closet, hiding from the people, from the crowd. And the priest who baptized my children, whom I love dearly, came to visit us. And he sat down with us on the floor. And my husband was, father, you've seen this before. Is it possible to be happy again? Can we be happy again? And he said, some people are. Some people are not. The people who are never happy again are people who honor their loved ones through suffering and grief. They think that the more they suffer, the more they loved. And the people who are happy again are those who choose to honor their loved one through love, gratitude, and service in different ways than suffering. And I believed him. I had faith in what he was saying. I trusted him. And in hindsight, I realized that that day, the very day after my daughter's death, I made the decision that I was going to be like the latter people, the ones who are happy again. And I was going to honor my daughter, my beloved daughter, through service. So now everything I do, I do in her honor. I do, because I understand love in a different way. We think that if we love something or someone, we can't live without it. But the truth is that that unconditional love is born for real, for real. When you don't have that. That thing or that person and you continue to serve on behalf of. To honor. I adore my daughter. She doesn't have to be cute and give me her hugs with her little hands around my neck and do the cute Christmas shows and get straight A's and make me proud. She doesn't need to do anything for me because love transcends death. So she continues to be my daughter, and I continue to love her, but in a different kind of relationship. And, you know, people say, no, but you have three kids now that, you know, when they're talking about. About how busy I am, you know, I always say I have four kids. And then when they learn about my story, they're like, oh, but three that take your time. I'm like, that's not true. The one that takes the most time is the one in heaven. Because, you know, I'm doing a lot of things to honor her. I've become a better person to honor her. So I made that decision. Everything starts with a choice. I made that decision eight years ago. It didn't become real eight years ago. It's a process. And I had the only way around pain is through. So I had to go through darkness and pain and. And excruciating. The excruciating kind that you feel like in your bones and you don't think you can go on, but I am the happiest woman on earth today.
