Dr. Betsy Guerra, a licensed psychotherapist and bereaved mother in South Florida, delivers an open letter to parents who lost children—especially the families affected by the Parkland (Stoneman Douglas) shooting in 2018. She shares that her daughter died on August 25, 2013, describes her own journey from devastating grief toward joy, and offers to share therapeutic tools and guidance so parents can honor their children through service, purpose, gratitude, and choosing joy rather than remaining defined by pain.
Questions this video answers
August 25, 2013.
The Parkland (Stoneman Douglas) shooting, 2018.
Chapters
This is an open letter to parents that have lost their children, but especially those from the Parkland shooting in 2018. I'm Dr. Betsy Guerra, and I am a licensed psychotherapist here in South Florida. But I am especially the mom of an angel. And I have been wanting to share some things with you because I can't stop thinking about you, the Parkland families that lost their child. I know what it is to wake up one day and go to sleep without your daughter or your son. My daughter died on August 25, 2013, in an unexpected accident. And when I heard about you, I couldn't help but think, not in the Parkland shooting, not in the guns problems, not in the kids that may be having mental problems or difficulties. I couldn't stop thinking about your child because it's not about the general thing and all the other things that contaminated that moment. It's about the life of your child. And I have had a burning desire to connect with you, to share some things with you. Because although I shared and experienced the excruciating pain that comes with that loss, I have been able to find my way to joy. And I am devoted and determined to sharing with you the things that helped me overcome my pain. Because I believe that in order to truly keep our children's memory alive, to let them live on, we have to heal. We have to learn how to honor them. Not with tears and pain and anger and resentment, but rather with service and purpose and joy and gratitude. Our children's lives were purposeful. They were important. They mattered. So much so that they're changing everything now. Other kids are going to be saved because of your child's life. And other parents are going to be spared from grieving because you have gracefully gone through this process. So it is my desire to help you keep your child's memory alive so that he or she is remembered forever by you choosing Joy, by you choosing to transform this pain into hope. The hope of being happy again, the hope of smiling when you think about your child. The hope of him or her being remembered forever, not as the Parkland shooting victim, but as the life of your child, by name and last name. So it is with a humble heart that I ask if you allow me to share the things that have helped me overcome pain, not just because I've endured it, but because also I was blessed to have the background in psychology and other tools that have contributed to me seeing and finding the light at the end of the tunnel. I know that it's been a couple years and a lot a lot of people probably think, like, are you not over it by now? It's been a while. But I also know that when you lose your life as you knew it, when you lose the life of your child, it feels like a forever thing. But it doesn't have to be that way. So, please, let me help you. Let me give you my gift. Let me honor your child so that you can find joy. Remember your child with gratitude, service and purpose and let their memories live on forever.
