How Do I Heal My Relationship With Money? | 48

Today we are going to talk about money, and I am going to teach you how to diagnose your money problem from a psycho-spiritual perspective. We're gonna learn the psychology of why you have this relationship with money, and we are going to understand money and abundance in the light of faith and spirituality. So be ready to learn 3 things that will help you diagnose your problem, and then I will give you 3 practical tools that will allow you to enhance and expand your relationship with money so that you may receive more abundance, which is what God created you for, because God came to give life and life in abundance. Are you ready? Let's do this! You may remember from the last few episodes, starting with Episode 42, that thoughts are sentences. That's it. We don't have to believe them. We don't have to engage with them. They don't have to mean a whole story about our lives. But what happens is that when thoughts, which are just sentences originally, are repeated over and over and over again, and we engage with them, and they're validated by the external world, by our bank accounts, by people, by our minds, then they become beliefs. And we have a whole lot of beliefs about money. Let's just think about a few that we've heard a ton of times. More money, more problems. Money doesn't grow on trees. We're not made of money. Be grateful for what you have. Money is the root of all evil. That's not for people like us. Money does not buy happiness. We cannot afford that. My favorite growing up, my mom would always say, "Estamos en austeridad." We are in austerity. Every month we were in austerity. Filthy or stinking rich. Notice the adjective that you use for someone who has a lot of money. Must be nice. So money. Oh, there's one that's, that's pobre pero honesto, like poor but honest. As if, if you were rich, then you're not honest, right? So of course you want to be poor and honest than rich and dishonest. Right? So we have all these words and phrases and quotes that we have heard, all these sentences that we have engaged with in our entire lives that we may have believed. And then what did we learn in the last few weeks in all the episodes that we talked about Be, Do, Have, and we talked about thoughts and beliefs and reality? What we learned is that those sentences that originally don't have a meaning of their own, with repetition, they become habitual, they become patterns, they're instilled, ingrained in ourselves. They become beliefs. And then those beliefs become reality. So we are creating the reality of scarcity in our lives many times because we do not understand abundance. And abundance is what we're going to talk about today, because abundance, my friend, is all there is. If you are struggling with scarcity, I'm going to talk mainly about money, but this can apply to scarcity of love, scarcity of peace, scarcity of fill in the blank. What is it that you're struggling with in your life? What is it that you don't have enough of? Now, psychologically speaking, we're going to diagnose what your problem with abundance is. We all have a thermostat, and imagine we have a thermostat in many aspects of our lives, but we're going to focus on abundance and money right now. So, you know how when you, when you put the thermostat of the AC at 70, for example, If it's really hot outside, it's like 100 degrees outside, a summer day, humid, all the things, the house inside gets super hot. So then that thermostat, which you set now at 70, needs to work hard, right? Like it sends information to the motor of the AC and it has to work really hard to lower the temperature because the outside weather makes it hotter inside. So now it's working on lowering the temperature. And then if it's a super cold winter day and it is like 4 degrees outside and you have it at 70, now the heater, that AC, has to work really hard to raise the temperature. But either way, whether we're lowering the temperature or raising the temperature, we are working towards the 70 degrees. That's, that's, that's what tells the rest of the AC unit what to do. So we each have a thermostat in which we have our own, like, comfort zone, like the set standard of what we feel comfortable or what we've known. And by comfortable, I don't mean that we like it, but it's what we're familiar with. It's what we know. It's what we've learned. It's what we've been doing or experiencing our entire lives. So we continue to do that. Why do you put the AC at 70? Because because you've been doing it your entire lives and it works, right? So we have this thermostat, this inner guidance, inner measure that helps us bring our abundance temperature up or down depending on how the environment is affecting us. What does that mean? If my thermostat reads 70, like I set it up at 70 consciously or unconsciously, with my thinking, my beliefs, what I've engaged with, right? Like, I have set it up. Sometimes you do it consciously, like when you do money mindset work, as was my case. And other times you just bring it from your childhood and everything you learned from your parents, your, your situation, the scarcity that you experienced, whatever you went through. You are deciding whether it's consciously or unconsciously what your thermostat is set As. So if you have a 70 degrees of abundance thermostat standard, then let's say you win the lotto and now you have $10 million that you won through playing the lotto. What's gonna happen? Your thermostat is gonna work really hard on lowering your bank account from those 10 millions to the 70 degrees, which maybe means $1,000 in your bank account, or playing catch-up, always in debt. I don't know. I don't know what that looks like. I don't know what 70 degrees means to you. So if your struggle is that you're always playing catch-up, if your struggle is that there's never enough, you'll never be able to get it. If your thermostat is that you're always indebted, you're getting loans and loans and loans and, you know, line of credit and you're always indebted. If your standard is that you have just enough, or you have a little more than enough, but you don't feel like you have an abundance of, right? Like, I don't know what your standard is. So take a moment to reflect, maybe pause this podcast and think about like, what is your money personality? What is your thermostat set as? Does your 70 degrees mean that you are always playing catch-up? Does it mean that you always have, right, like you're paycheck to paycheck, just enough? Does it mean that you're always in debt? Does it mean that you're always fill in the blank? What does that look like for you? So you have set that thermostat to that. And it doesn't matter how much money you make. It doesn't matter how much money you spend. You're always going to find your way to that temperature, to that reality, that identity of who you are when it comes to money. And if you remember a couple of weeks ago when we did the podcast on Be, Do, Have, the BE DO HAVE model, you know that if you— the thermostat is like the be. This is who I am in terms of in my relationship with money. Based on that beingness is how hard you're going to work to spend the money, to get rid of it, to reject it, or to attract it and to welcome it and to receive it. Does that make sense? So that is psychologically speaking how you set your thermostat. You are basing it on the sentences, the thoughts, the beliefs that were transferred onto you by your family of origin, by your life circumstances when you were growing up, and even traumas that you may have experienced financially that feel very real. Like, the body keeps score. The body remembers all of that. So then now it's not just your thoughts of like, oh my goodness, money is not for me. It's also your experience, your emotional experience, and the emotions we know that we know live in the body. So now your body is constantly working, constantly working to bring you back to your standard, to your 70 degrees in the thermostat. What that means is that whenever you make a lot of money, you're going to find a way to get rid of it so that you're back at square one. And whenever you don't make enough money, then you're going to work your way to making a little more to, to reach that standard. So it works both ways, like the thermostat. Now, this is not just a psychological thing. This is not just a habitual way of relating to money. It's also a spiritual thing. It's a faith problem. If we go to Scripture, we can see in John 10:10 that, "I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it abundantly." God came to give life and life to the full. Not just enough, not playing catch-up, not a little bit of, not scarcity. To the full, abundantly. That came to give you— give it all to you. And yes, that includes money. Now we, we think because we have these ideas about money, we don't talk about money. I just— I came from that. Because we have this idea about money, we're like, no, but You know, we can't be talking about money because, you know, in the Bible it also talks about like how the rich can't enter the kingdom of heaven. And we take things literally. And then we have Matthew 6:26-34. It's a little long, but I want to read a few parts of it. Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow. They neither toil nor spin, and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you? Oh, you of little faith. I don't think I need to say much after this. If you believe, if you have faith in that God came to give life and life to the full in abundance, and that he's gonna dress you like he does with the lilies and the grass, and he's gonna feed you like he does with the birds, and he's gonna love you unconditionally and for free and provide for you and your family— if you don't believe that, you are lacking faith. You are not trusting in God. And faith is something that you must build. It's like a muscle. You must go to the gym and train for it. And the gym may look like prayer, may look like silence, meditation, going to church, Scripture. Scripture is life-giving. Spend time with God so that you may build your faith and trust in that which you cannot see. Faith is believing in what you cannot see. You can't see the numbers in your bank account? No problem. That doesn't mean that they're not there. In fact, there's science. I'm all about combining science and spirituality. There's science that confirms that what we can experience with our senses is only 0.0000001% of reality. We can see, we can hear, we can experience, we can touch. So if it's just that, that we see in the bank account, then where is the other 0.999999% of reality? That's where faith comes in. If you only focus on that little part that you call reality and that you've been trained to believe in, you are missing out on the 0.999999% sent that is abundance that you cannot see. And because you can't see it and you don't believe it's possible for you, you are rejecting it, you're pushing it away, you're closing off to it, and you're living in scarcity. That's not what God came to do. God came to give life, and life to the enough, and life in scarcity, a little bit of life, just a little bit. No, life to the full, abundantly. It's a faith problem. So now you have a thermostat problem, we need to raise that thermostat. You also have a faith problem. And lastly, you have the main and only problem really that there is, a separation problem. And if you haven't come to the Faith and Growth webinar, if you haven't experienced and understood what the only problem you're experiencing truly is, please go right now, do yourself a favor, and go to faithbasedcoachingacademy/fw. Sign up for the next webinar so that you may learn and understand this ever so deeply and solve your problem once and for all. So in that webinar, I explain that the The only problem there is, is not relationship problem, it's not financial difficulties, it's not illness, it's not legal issues, it's not the problem that you're having with your child, it's not anxiety, it's not depression, it's separation. When you are experiencing a problem of scarcity, a financial issue, a problem with love, relationships, understanding your kid, legal issues, you are separated from the source of abundance, justice, love, the source of greatness, the source of peace, the source of joy. So it's just separation. And when you breach that gap, that separation between you and God, when you come back to oneness with God, then how much more abundance can there be? You are a wave in the ocean. And if you act as if you were just a wave, then there's never going to be enough. But if you act as part of an all-powerful, all-mysterious, all-great body of water that is the ocean, if you believe that you are backed up as a little wave in the ocean, If you're backed up by the immense, infinite power of the ocean, he's got you. You are backed up by God. The moment that you tap into that greatness, into that all-powerful, mysterious, incredible, divine, infinite power is the moment that scarcity is not even a possibility. Even if you don't see it in your bank account, you know that He will always dress you like He does with the lilies in the grass, and He will always feed you like He does with the birds, and He will always love, protect you, provide for you and your loved ones. You just have to stay connected. So this is a separation problem if you are going through any form of abundance issues. And again, I'm focusing on money today because That's what you asked me. I ask you guys to give me ideas for topics of podcast, and this is one that was given to me on social media. So if you would like to be supported, you wanna ask a question and you want me to do a whole podcast to answer it and to coach you through it, go to thenextpodcasttopic.com and just tell me, tell me what you would like for me to address in the next episode. Okay, so now you have everything that you need to diagnose your abundance problem. You're gonna go back to your childhood and your upbringing, and you're gonna explore what were those thoughts, those beliefs that were instilled in you. How did you witness your parents, your family do it? What life traumas, events may have impacted your relationship with money? And then get a, get a feeling for what is your money personality. Like, what is that identity that you have adopted and believed as yours with regards to abundance and money? For me, it was, I am always playing catch-up kind of personality because I learned early on that money is to give away to the poor. Money is to give to those who are less fortunate than I am. Money is to be generous, and it's a good thing to give it away and to be generous. And money is not for luxuries, definitely not for luxuries. We must be simple, we must be humble, we must not be spending on dinners and restaurants and vacations and things. And, you know, just keep it super simple and give it all away. That's what I learned. My parents were very generous, They were very frugal. They were both accountants. So, you know, there was always a budget. And if we met that budget, that's it. There's no more money left. And they were savers. They believed in the importance of saving. They brought that into our home, and I naturally picked it up. And I loved how my dad was so generous and how everybody was always telling me how good he was to them, you know, that felt good. So that was reinforced. And I became the super generous broke person that I was for a long time. But can I tell you that although I was always broke, 'cause I was always giving money away, I was always abundant. I was never operating from scarcity. And I wanna emphasize that difference because, Scarcity, you can be broke. You know, your bank account can reveal that you're broke, you don't have money, but that doesn't mean that you have to live in scarcity. Scarcity is the mindset, the energy, the attitude, the feeling, the emotions of there's not enough. It affects your nervous system. It creates a lot of anxiety. It hurts your body. It hurts your mind, it hurts your actions, it hurts who you be, how you show up. Many times we compromise our integrity, our goodness, our kindness, our values when we live in scarcity, 'cause scarcity comes from fear. So I grew up being very abundant, meaning I always knew God was gonna provide. That was actually my favorite quote. I have a friend from childhood who would always think of me when she heard the phrase, "God provides." I was always like, "Ah, God's gonna provide, God's gonna provide." And He did. Oh my goodness, did He provide. And that's the beauty of abundance, that you don't need to see the numbers for it to make sense. I don't know why I was always abundance. I don't know, because I sure didn't learn this at home. So maybe it was my faith, maybe it was my connection to God that revealed it to me. Because this is, after all, a faith and spiritual matter. But I did learn the personality, or I earned and owned the personality of, I always need to be giving money away, which then puts me in a position of like, I'm always broke, and I'm always playing catch-up. I never have enough in the bank accounts. So I was broke, but I was never in scarcity. Now, being broke is, is an experience. It's a process that you go through. It's a thing that you're exposed to, right? But being scarce is a state of being. So broke is temporary. Like, you could be broke today, you can have money tomorrow. Like, it goes up and down. It's all good. It's like— but abundance, scarcity, those are states of being. So they affect your nervous system. They affect your body. They affect your emotions. If you're constantly in scarcity, you're in fight or flight. You're fearing. You're like counting the pennies. You're sometimes sacrificing, like I said, your values to get a little extra here or there. When you are in abundance, you don't need to know where it's coming from next, but it's like breathing. You never— like when you inhale, do you ever think like, are there enough trees around me? Releasing oxygen so that I can take a sip of air when I inhale my next inhale, the next time I breathe? Do you ever think that? Do you ever think about whether there's enough oxygen for you to inhale? I doubt it. I know you don't. You just breathe. You just inhale. You trust that there's gonna be oxygen there, even if you're in New York where there's barely any trees, you know? You know there's gonna be oxygen. You know God's gonna provide that next sip of air. That's how we need to think about money. That's how we need to think about love. That's how we need to think about peace. That's how we need to think about guidance, about justice, about forgiveness, about all the things that may be robbing you of your peace. If you just believe. That all it takes is trust, faith, believing that even though you can't see the air, there's gonna be oxygen for you to inhale the next time you breathe. That's what abundance is about. Abundance is about inhaling everything that's available to you and receiving it and trusting that it will come, that God will provide. So I had that, I'm always playing catch-up kind of personality because I was— every time I had a little bit, I would give it back. I would give it away. I remember, like, it took me years of getting paid $6 an hour in a pharmacy that I worked in, you know, when I was in college. It took me years to save, like, I don't know, $1,000, $2,000, something like that. That felt like a lot of money. I was so proud of it. And then there was a coworker in the pharmacy that I used to work in. That didn't have money for rent. And just like that, I was like, "I have $2,000. You can have them." And I would give it away. So it was like, every time I would save and accumulate a little bit, I would give it away, and I would give it away. And that was working out just fine until I had a business. You see, I am the container that holds my business. So in the measure that I expand, my money mindset, my abundance mentality, then my business can expand and grow. But if I'm still too small and contracted and limited, then there's so much I can do with my business. So what happened was that with the same generosity complex that I had, I was receiving money. I was getting paid for the work that I was doing, but then I was giving it away. I was, overpaying staff members, I was overhiring people who were supporting me in the business. I was, you know, I was overspending. Usually overinvesting was the thing that I struggled with the most. And in the process, I thought I was being so generous and so abundant, but that wasn't abundance, 'cause abundance includes a good stewardship of money, and I wasn't stewarding it well. I was always giving it away. I couldn't hold it in. I didn't have the capacity. My container was too contracted, too small to fit in the possibility of experiencing in my physical reality the abundance that I believed I had in my spirit and in my mind, right? Because I do believe that I've had most of my life, some exceptions for sure, I've been very abundant. I have believed that there's always more than enough. But in my physical reality, I've often been broke and I've often been playing catch-up, and especially in my business. And it wasn't until it became so real in the business and such a problem that was impacting other people— well, not really, because ultimately I would stop paying myself, which is not good— but my family, right? Because when I pay myself, it's for my family. So in that sense, it's other people. And my nervous system started to like suffer from it too, because since I come from a place of abundance, like not having enough in my physical bank account, like created the stress of not being able to, possibly not being able to pay my credit cards, pay my team members. Like I would always figure it out, and God really did always provide, but there was a lot of stress involved. And abundance is not supposed to come with stress. It's supposed to come with faith. It's supposed to come with trust. You just breathe. You just trust that whatever you need is gonna come. But if you're not stewarding the money well, as was my case, that's a problem. And that was because of my thermostat. I had a thermostat set at 50 degrees, and every time that it was super hot in Miami. The AC had to work really hard to get to 50. So I would work and work and hustle and do the thing. And I always showed up in my business and I would make a ton of money. I would do really, really well. But then I would work really hard to get rid of it. Really hard to get rid of it. So Your thermostat is what needs to change first. And now I'm going to tell you how to solve for your money problem or your abundance problem. Okay, so I'm gonna give you 3 tools that are going to help guide you through a journey that will expand you and enhance your relationship with money so that you may be a testament of abundance and faith and trust. First, we're going to start by reprogramming your thermostat. In order to reprogram your thermostat, we're going to reframe your mindset about money. All those beliefs that we talked about at the beginning, more money, more problems, money doesn't grow on trees, like all of that, we're going to reframe. But before we get there, we're going to, we're going to think about abundance as a state of being. Abundance is not how much you have in the bank. So you can be abundant even when you don't have money in your physical bank account. Okay? Abundance has nothing to do with how much you have. Abundance is a state of being. And if you go back to the Be, Do, Have model that I discussed a couple of weeks ago in the podcast, then you'll be able to understand how to step into the identity of, in my case, the businesswoman who has more money than she knows what to do with, right? Like, you decide what that's going to look like for you. How do you want to— how do you want to elevate your thermostat? What do you want it to be at for you to feel, wow, this is good, this feels really good? So abundance is not a number. It is a state of being. It's an experience. It's an emotional— you should feel it in your body. It feels really good and delicious. Abundance is also not about money alone, but that's what we're focusing on today. Abundance will impact love, health, joy, confidence, peace, energy, like all of it. And you can have an abundance of time. I'm always saying that because that's another one of my struggles is like time. And I'm like, I have an abundance of time. And when people call me, I know you're busy. I'm like, no, no, no, I have an abundance of time. And I try to be very present with the people that I'm exposed to so that they feel like I have nothing else to do in the world except to be with them. That's something that feels really good in my body. So abundance is not just about dollars. And abundance is also not something that you chase or manifest. Like, you can manifest the number in your bank account. You can manifest the amount of money you receive. But abundance, because it's a state of being, is not something so much that you manifest, but more something that you you open yourself up to experiencing and receiving, the more you expand. It's a grace of God. And we talked also in the last few episodes about how God has all these graces to give us, including abundance. But if we, if, if we, we are the size of a drawer and the abundance, you know, that grace is the size of a car, how are we going to fit a car in a drawer, right? Like, we need to expand, to open up, to Receive that grace, that peace, that knowing that there's oxygen in your next inhale for you to take in, that there's money, that there's love, that there's peace, that there's energy, that there's all of the things that God has in store for us. But again, we're gonna focus on money just 'cause it makes it easier to follow. But if your thing is something else, feel free to substitute money for what that is. In the process of reframing our mindset and seeing abundance as a state of being and understanding that it's not attached to numbers, we're also going to be mindful of our words. Words matter. Words are weighted. And words are what form those sentences, those thoughts that then become beliefs, that then become reality. Words matter. They have a lot of weight. And you get to reprogram your subconscious mind by using words that are aligned with that new identity of abundance, that new money personality of there's more than enough. And the way you do that is like changing words such as, or expressions such as, I want a car. I want I want to make this money. I want to be able to buy that. I want comes from a place of scarcity 'cause it means there's lack. I want means that, you know, you want it, but you don't have, because you don't have it. But the idea of abundance is that it's already yours. All you have to do is open up to receive it and experience it. So when you say I want, you're also saying I want because I don't have, because I lack. So instead we're going to say, I have, I get to manifest, I'm going to create, you know, the possibility of having this car or buying that thing or join the Faith Based Coaching Academy. Like, you know, you get to use different words. So let me tell you a few of the ones that you don't want to use and why. And then I'll give you a list of those that you want to use. So we don't use I want, we can use I desire. Because I desire is like, I'm excited to, I want, like, you know, I was going to say want. I desire means like it's something that I feel in my heart that I want to manifest, that I want to create, right? So you could say I desire instead of I want. You don't want to say I wish. Oh, I wish, but I'm not in control. So that's disempowering. Like, I wish I could do this, but yeah, there went that. I wish I could have, you know, thinner thighs and like buns of steel, but I'm Puerto Rican and, you know, like, forget it, I can never get there. If that's my thinking, then yeah, wishful thinking, that's why they're calling that. So we don't use wish, we use, again, desire is a good one. I need, 'cause I ain't got, which again equals lack. I need this, I need that. Like, no, you don't, you desire it. You are going to create it. You're excited to get it. You are working towards it, right? Like, it's a different energy. We're also not going to use "I can't." Many times, "I can't" means "I don't know how to." That's different. I can't buy the car. Well, I don't know how to create the means so that I can get the car. I can't. Do that workout. Well, I don't know how to do snatches and all those cleans and all the things that I'm doing now in CrossFit. But, you know, my coaches do and they can teach me, right? So there's a difference between I can't and I don't know how to because I've never done it before. So if you've never been wealthy before, if you've never felt like you have more than you know what to do with, then you— it's not that you can't, it's that you haven't been able to do it in the past and you don't know how to. So that's a different energy. I'm trying. No, you don't try. You don't try. You either do or you don't. We don't try. Like a friend of mine would always say that her dad told her like, you try to pick up that paper from the floor. Try, try to pick it up. No, you either pick it up or you don't. So we don't say try. I'm trying. No, no, no, you're doing. You're actually doing it. We also don't use I hope because, you know, I hope it might happen, it might not happen. But what I mean, I hope, wishful thinking. No, no, we're not using "I hope." We're using hope in our lives, and we're making sure that we always believe that there's a possibility and that we're always gonna rise. So that hope is good. But we don't say like, "Ay, I hope I can get it." No, I will get it. I'm excited to get it. My daughter is in the process of applying for colleges, and she said, "You know, I hope I can get into UF." Oh, no, no, you will. When I go to UF, Well, like, just visualize that already, right? Like, so language matters. I should, but maybe I don't, and maybe I don't want to, right? Like, I should, should've, could've, would've. We don't use should either. Instead, we're going to replace I want, I wish, I need, I can't, I'm trying, I should, I hope for I have, I create, I'm grateful for, I get to, I enjoy, I can, I choose, I love, I'm ready for. Let's go. Right? We're gonna use different words. I desire. We're gonna use different words that have different energy and remind our bodies and our nervous system that it's already ours. I wish I could inhale oxygen next time I breathe. Do we do that? No, no, no. We just— we just breathe. And there it is. There it is. All we have to do is to receive abundance. To trust that it will be available to us. Another thing for the mindset of abundance is my pizza story. So I did my internship in New York, and I love New York-style pizza. And I remember going to these pizza stops, because by the way, they were also cheaper, and I was on a budget. I was abundant. I was traveling, going to see my fiancé in Miami. I was in New York. But I was broke. So I would buy pizza a lot because it was cheaper. And every time I would go to one of those New York style pizza places, they had all of the pies behind the glass, a clear glass. And you could see how much was left of the cheese and the pepperoni. And I love cheese. So I would be in line and maybe I'm the second in line. And there's one cheese pizza left, and there's one person in front of me. So there were people that, who were, when they were in the same situation that I was in, they'd be like, "Please don't get the cheese pizza. Please, please, please don't get the last one. Please don't, don't get another one. I want the last one," right? That's scarcity mindset. There's not enough. It's gonna run out. But I, on the other hand, was like, "Please get the cheese pizza. Get it, get it, order it right now. Come on, come on, order cheese. Yes, you know you want it, you know you want it, order cheese pizza." Because I knew, I couldn't see it, it was inside the oven, I couldn't see it. I knew that if he got the last slice of pizza, it was going to be replenished by a whole brand new freshly made delicious New York style pizza. And I wanted that. I wanted the brand new one, the fresh one. So that's what abundance is. Abundance is imagining life as a big pie of pizza, whether it's money, whether it's love, whether it's clients, whether it's possibilities, opportunities, entries to a college, whatever that looks like for you. Imagine it's a giant pie of pizza, and every time somebody grabs a slice, it replenishes and it goes back to 100% of the pie. Or you get 2 slices, no problem, replenishes. Think about if you have kids, think about, you know, maybe you have more than one kid, and when you had your first one, you were like, oh my goodness, all of my love is for this kid, like all of your pizza. All of your love is for that kid. And then you were pregnant again. You got pregnant again and you're like, ooh, how am I going to like this? How am I going to love this second kid the way I love the first one? Like, I don't know. I don't know that I have enough love for them. And then you have the second one. You're like, oh, you have like 100% of your love for this kid too. And then, and then you have the third and the fourth, as was my case, and you have 100% of love for each one of them. How is that possible? Abundance. Love doesn't run out. Money doesn't run out. The number of clients that you can serve in your business, they don't— it doesn't run out either. The possibilities that are available to you don't run out because every time that one slice is removed, it's replenished. It is. It comes back to 100%. And when you think a pie of pizza that has only 12 slices, 12 minus 2 equals 10. But abundance minus 2 equals abundance, always. What you're looking for is a whole pie of pizza. It's 100% available to you. There's enough for you, and there's enough for your competitors, and there's enough for everybody who's around you. Do you believe that? That's where the faith comes in. And that's why in the next part of this journey, or the next tool that I'm going to share with you, has a lot to do with faith. And I am going to call it gratitude instead of building of faith, because I believe when you build your gratitude muscle, you inevitably build your faith. So gratitude is the second practical tool that I want to invite you to consider. When you create gratitude practices, when you choose to see all the blessings that are available to you, when the little bit that you have becomes like an exaggeration of— you know, magic and blessings and possibilities and miracles. Like, when you view life through the lens of gratitude, you multiply what you're grateful for. Gratitude is an emotion that is very high, a very high vibration emotion. All emotions have like energy and like a frequency, a vibration. It could be measured, actually. So this is scientific too. And gratitude has a very high frequency. When you're feeling gratitude, you're vibrating at a very elated, positive, high, delicious vibration. And what happens is that, you know, like vibration attracts like vibration, like frequency attracts like frequency. So when you're vibrating, you know, as grateful, then it's almost like you're shining bright, you're attractive, and all the opportunities that are available to you suddenly recognize that you are the container that they need to go to. You are attractive. And that's why they call it the law of attraction. Like, we attract these things. So when you're practicing gratitude, you're thanking God for the little. And in Scripture, we hear that to those who are entrusted with little and they do well with that— I'm totally butchering the Scripture because I don't I don't remember it exactly, but the idea is that if God entrusts you with little and you're grateful for that, and you steward it well, and you use it well, you multiply it, then He gets to entrust you with more. If you can handle little, then you can handle more. So the idea is that instead of thinking like, oh my gosh, I'm always in debt and I don't have enough and I didn't make enough money and I don't have enough clients and I don't have enough love and— I don't have enough possibilities. If that's what you're focusing on, are you vibrating at a very high frequency of gratitude? No, no, you're, you're, you're actually in the, in the lowest of the lows, which is shame or guilt or, or scarcity or victimhood. Right. Many times we feel victims in our circumstances and that's very low vibration. So are you going to be attractive? Yes, you're going to be attractive. But you know what you're going to attract? More of the same. And that's what Murphy's Law refers to. When it rains, it pours, Murphy's Law. Self-fulfilling prophecy is the name we use in psychology. You prophesize that something's gonna happen, something bad's gonna happen. Oh, when is the next bomb gonna explode? When is the shoe gonna drop? And it sure will, but not because you were a prophet and you knew that it was gonna happen, you were a mind reader, but rather because you said it. You self-fulfilled it. You attracted it. You created it. You are the producer and director of your movie, and you have more power than you know. Gratitude appeals to the masses because this is not just for the people of faith. Gratitude is something that everybody can do to build their faith and to manifest and to create and to experience abundance. So what do I mean by gratitude? Like, what can you do about gratitude to create a better relationship with money and a better circumstance in your bank account? Because the idea of stepping into this abundance mindset is not to stay broke. The idea is to, if you think about the Be, Do, Have model that I shared a couple weeks ago in the podcast, the idea is that if you be abundant, Then from that identity of abundance, identity of like, I have more than I know what to do with, from there you do, be, do. From there you act, you make decisions. And that's where stewardship comes in. That's when you're managing and stewarding the graces that God's giving you as a wealthy, abundant person. And then ultimately you have the money in the bank account, you have the love, the boyfriend, the husband, the wife, like the thing, right? Like what you desire. So the idea is not to stay broke and abundant. The idea is to begin with abundance so that then you can manifest the riches that you're looking for, whether it's, again, money, peace, love, whatever it is that you're looking for. So a few little hacks on gratitude are to view money as an expression of appreciation. I forgot who I got this from. Maybe it was Happy Pocket Full of Money author or Busting Loose from the Money Game. I don't remember right now, but one of those authors spoke about this. So I borrowed this term and it's— he talked about like, think of money as an expression of appreciation. So money, you're not paying bills, you're expressing appreciation to FPL for allowing you to run your thermostat at the house, the real thermostat, and, you know, cool it down when it's a hot summer day or warming it up when it's a very cold winter day. You're expressing appreciation to the power and electricity company. You are expressing appreciation to AT&T. Thank you for allowing me to communicate with my kids and be able to see where they're at through Life360. You express appreciation to everybody you pay. And when you do that, isn't it exciting to pay? I have to tell you, I believe this to be true about myself. Every time I pay someone, I pay them with joy. I'm like, "Here you go!" I throw my credit card at them like, "Charge me right now because I value what you're about to do for me, the service that you're gonna provide, the product that you're gonna give me. I value that so much that I just want—" to pay you. I want to express my gratitude. So that's a mindset shift. When you come from a place of gratitude, you're not spending money, you're not paying bills, you're not paying debt. Thank you, bank. Thank you for allowing me to pay you this mortgage little by little so that I could have my house 10 years ago and create holy moments and memories with my family. Expression of appreciation. So view bills and expenses not as bills and expenses, but rather as an opportunity to express gratitude for what those companies, people, government, whatever, even taxes. Thank you for everything you're doing for me and my family. I appreciate you. Here's my money. So that's a mindset shift. Another mindset shift that I got from Rhonda Byrne, the author of The Secret, is every time you're going to pay someone, like, you know, pay a bill or pay someone for a service, you're going to visualize that amount of money. And then you can add an extra zero at the end. You're going to visualize that amount of money as coming into your account. Like, so instead of, of you paying it and giving it away, it's, it's coming back to you, right? Like you're— so let's say I'm paying $1,000 I'm gonna, I always add a zero. I'm gonna add a zero. I'm gonna be like, ooh, I am receiving $10,000. Now, this may seem like a, like it may seem dumb if you're like, wait, but I'm not, I'm not getting it back or I'm not receiving it. And I will challenge you on that because, okay, forget the extra zero that I usually add because Rhonda Byrne does that too. Let's say like the same amount. If you charge me $1,000, and I have a hard time expressing appreciation because I really didn't want to pay you for that. So, you know, that mindset shift or trick didn't work. Then I'm going to think like, oh, $1,000 are coming to me. Well, guess what? For me to give you the $1,000, I have to receive them first. So if I owe you $1,000, it's not— it's not a lie that that's really coming to me. It must come to me so that it can then go to you. And if it came to me once, it can come to me twice and 3 times and 4 times and 1,000 times. So another mindset shift and another little like trick that you could do as an exercise is every time you're paying something, be like, oh man, like I just made $300 because I paid this and I just made $1,000 here and I paid taxes, I made $10,000. Right, so just view it as like it's just coming to you because it is. For you to give it away, it must come to you. So that's another trick that I use in trying to like live from a place of gratitude. Like, so I'm grateful every time I have to pay, I'm grateful every time I receive. That's another thing that I practice. When I get a notification from my bank or my system that a payment came in, I'll open the email and I'll look at it and I'll be like, thank you, Lord. Thank you. You're so generous and so good to me. And I literally just sit there in gratitude and I tap into the feeling. It doesn't matter if it's $7. You know, I have a book and the book pays very little. I have an app. My app pays very little. So it doesn't matter if it's a little amount. I'm not like, oh my gosh, only $7. No, no, like, oh, $7 that I was— sometimes from social media, they send me a little bit of money too. And it's in the eyes of human insignificant. In my eyes, it's just that energy, that expression of appreciation, that feeling of like, oh my gosh, I did something that supported someone and they're expressing gratitude to me and I'm going to receive it. Thank you. So connect, connect, connect with gratitude. Gratitude is healing, and gratitude helps you step into the identity of abundance so that you may open up to receiving it. And lastly, we are going to raise the thermostat. We're gonna expand your, your container so that you may fit all of God's graces. By doing these exercises. Number 1, we're going to visualize. Visualize yourself having the thing that you desire. Like, what do you feel? Where are you at? Who are you with? What are you wearing? What are you listening to? What are the smells? Like, just use all of your senses to imagine vividly the moments in which you have everything that you ever dreamt of, and you look back and you're like, I've arrived. If your goal was like a certain amount of money and you fulfilled it, like, just go there, go to that moment, go to your future self and like indulge in that vision. Enjoy it. Feel it. Believe it. Believe it. Believe it. Believe it. Believe it. Faith. Number 2, you're going to live with your hands open. Extend your hands right now. Open the palms of your hands with the, with the palms facing upward. If you extend your hands with your palms open, you are receptive. You are telling God, come on in. You are telling the God of oxygen, I'm ready to inhale you. I'm ready to receive it. But many times what we don't realize we're doing is like, God, why am I not making enough? Why am I not finding the love of my life? Why? But we're living with our hands closed and the arms tight to our bodies. We're contracting. We're avoiding, we're rejecting, we're pushing away. I have no idea how many people I've seen in my practice that are looking for more love in their marriages, in their relationships. And then when you see the spouse giving it to them, they don't know how to receive it, so they push it away. And then what happens? The spouse never wants to give it to them again. Well, when you live with your hands open, when you live in gratitude, like, thank you, and give it to me, baby. When you have your arms stretched out forward, up, and your hands are— the palms of your hands are facing upward in position of openness and receptivity. When you live like that, God is like, oh my goodness, at last! I couldn't wait to give it to you. He can't wait. He can't wait to give it all to you. So if you have a strong desire in your heart for something you don't yet have, maybe it's health, maybe it's money, maybe it's love, maybe it's peace because you feel so much anxiety all the time, just open up, receive it. And a way of doing that is by intentionally allowing others to do for you. I remember going through the exercise because By the way, us givers and generous people, we have a hard time receiving, and there's arrogance in that. Why are you only the kind of person who can give to others? Why can't you be humble enough and vulnerable enough to receive? I didn't think of generosity being a little bit of— having a little bit of arrogance there, but when I studied it, I was like, yeah, who do I think I am that I'm only the giver? Why am I thinking that I'm better than others? And that I only give. Why don't I humble myself down a little bit and open up to receiving too? I'm not that big a deal after all that I don't need anything and I got it on my own. That's gotten me in a lot of trouble. Open up. So an exercise that I've done for that is I have decided that for like a certain amount of time, I am going to say yes to any help that anybody offers. So if somebody offers to open the door for me, sometimes my natural reaction is like, "No, don't worry." And I'll be like, "Thank you, yes." Or like, "Hey, can I carry this for you?" I'm like, "No, I got it." Oh, wait, wait, wait, yes, I'd love for you to carry it for me. Or, you know, "Do you want a glass of water, baby?" "No, baby, I'm good. I'll get it now." "Yes, yes, please bring me the glass of water," right? Yes, accept, practice saying yes, practice receiving, practice being vulnerable and allowing for others to hold space for you. Practice being the receiver so that you may get in the habit of receiving and inevitably be able to experience, receive the grace of abundance because that helps you expand. You're making room, you're making space. And lastly, the Be, Do, Have model of manifestation. That is another tool within the raising the thermostat, like expanding your thermostat. That's another model that you may follow. I'm not going to get into that because I have a whole episode on that. Actually, I have two episodes on that. So if you go back to episode number 43 and 44, you are going to learn the Be, Do, Have model that will help you experience abundance and manifest wealth, whether it's wealth of money or love, peace, whatever it is that you're looking for. So this has been a lot. So we're going to summarize real quick. First, we're going to diagnose our abundance problem, like what is our relationship with money? And we're going to go back to studying our thermostat, like what is the personality the identity that we have stepped into and believed from our childhood or bringing. And we're going to examine if we have some of those limiting beliefs, limiting thoughts that have continued to impact the way that we relate to money. And we're gonna diagnose ourselves as like, okay, my thermostat is playing catch-up or not having good, not having enough, or paycheck to paycheck, whatever it is that you resonate with, like diagnose your thermostat, like where are you at and why, understand why and decide what you're going to change about that. Then we're going to understand that maybe it's our faith what's lacking. Faith is what allows us to see what is invisible to the eye, what allows us to believe in what the things can— the what the senses cannot perceive. So evaluate your faith and see if you're spending enough time with God to become one with Him and to think like Him and to trust that there's oxygen for your next inhale. And then lastly, we're going to explore what separates us from God, because ultimately the only problem there is is not scarcity, it's not being broke, it's sin. Separation. So explore what's separating you. And for that, you're gonna sign up right now for the free webinar at faithbasedcoachingacademy.com/fw so that you can learn a little bit about what separates you from God, where is the gap, and how can you solve for that. Once you have clarity on your diagnosis and you understand what is preventing you from stepping into the abundant life that God created for you, You are going to use the tools that I shared to expand and to experience abundance. And those are, number one, you're going to reframe your mindset. You're going to change the way you relate to, think about money and experience it. Then you're going to practice gratitude. And every bill is gonna be an expression of appreciation. And it's also going to be the opportunity for you to receive. Whenever you're giving away, it's really that you're receiving. You're going to perceive it in that manner, and you're going to be grateful for the little so that more can be entrusted to you. And then lastly, you're going to expand your thermostat by practicing visualizations. Just imagine everything in details as if it was already true. You're going to Open your hands and live with your hands open. Be receptive to receiving, and you're going to master the Be-Do-Have model. You're welcome. Whenever you create this new thermostat and you manifest that which God wants to give you, send me a message and let me know. I would love to hear how this impacted you. I can't wait to see you in the next one. And remember to go to thenextpodcasttopic.com if you would like to ask a question or ask for a theme that you would like for me to discuss in the next episode. Okay, I love you. Have a beautiful, abundant day. Bye.