Betsy Guerra says rushing to rescue someone in pain traps you both in it. Instead, climb down a metaphorical ladder to meet them, hold space, listen, and share their tears. Then climb back up and extend a hand with hope.
What we do when we love so hard is as soon as we hear that our friend is in the bottom of the pit, our reaction is to like just run and jump in the pit. Now there's two of you. Not only can you not help your friend or your loved one out, you can't get yourself out of that. So what do we do now? We practice true empathy. For a moment, you're gonna feel the feels. Allow them. And then grab a long ladder and then climb down. To where your friend is. You don't tell them to stop crying. You don't tell them that it's gonna be okay. You don't tell them not to worry. You just hold space. You listen. You cry with them. You feel with them. And then you climb back up the ladder and you extend your hand and you ask them to come with you, right? Like, you provide support. You, you give a hand. You, you offer hope.
How to FIX your RELATIONSHIPS: Understand the attachment styles! #lifelessons #relationship
