How COVID impacted Speakers Worldwide

Okay. Welcome gang. It's that time of the week. Just wanted to share with you what's happening with your little voice right now. It's a great time of the year here in Phoenix, Arizona. In Scottsdale, Arizona. It's beautiful, balmy, 70 degrees outside, other places frigid and cold. But here I just wanted to share a few minutes with you what's happening with your little voice. So if you want to share, type in the comment. What little voice bugs you the most? That's the topic today. What little voice is bugging you the most. And if I can do something to help you, give you some tools, give you some techniques. As you know, in the book Little voice Mastery, wherever it is in the book Little voice Mastery, here it is in the book Little voice mastery. There's 21 techniques on how to control little voice in your head. And even though I wrote this book while ago, the demand for people asking, well, how do I handle this, how do I handle that? There's way more than 20 techniques because there's way more than 20 little voices if you're like me. So if you've got a little voice, share them, type in the comment box, you know, what is your little voice doing? And I'll do my best to support you with it. Okay, so we'll do that for a little while this afternoon just to pass you through whatever the things that are that are holding you back. Okay. Just to let you know, I've just finished the last of the last video of a 21 day little voice challenge. So with short videos, three or four minutes and in less than three or four minutes each day you get a challenge, you get a little voice issue, you get a challenge on how to fix it and you fix it and then we go to the next day. So it's, it's very powerful and there's some techniques in there that I'll hopefully I can share some with with today. Oh, here's a good one. Anand, good to see you again. Not good enough. From Mubai India, up very late I might add. So we'll address that one. But, but yeah, so a way for you to, and to be totally free, just check our website, go to blairsinger.com and you'll see it soon. We're in the, we're in the process of editing it and we're going to be releasing it on multiple platforms. So again it's an opportunity for you to get some mastery over your little voice. Okay, so the first one was I'm not good enough. Well, that's pretty common one. So first thing, a little voice is where does that little voice come from and why? Well, remember one thing. Couple things, actually. Number one, the little voice, everybody, you know the little voice. I'm talking about someone that just went. One little voice. I don't have one. That's the one. And that little voice is really in there to. Designed to protect you. Protect you. Yeah. Protect you from what? Well, protect you from hurting yourself. Protect you from taking risks. Protects you from exposing yourself in an arena where you might get embarrassed or hurt, emotionally hurt, probably more than physically hurt. And so that's, that's how it builds up over time. It builds up over time. Now it gets reinforced, obviously gets reinforced by other people telling you you're not good enough. And why do people say that? Because they know it's a hot button for most people and it can keep you suppressed a little bit. But how do you overcome it? That's the big issue. I'm not good enough. And this particularly comes up for speakers. I call it the imposter syndrome. The imposter syndrome. Fear of cold calling. That's a good one. Okay, I'll get to that one too. Let me write it down so I don't forget Imposter syndrome. What's that? Well, the reason some people don't speak and don't teach or they don't have full power or energy is because in their minds they go, well, I haven't made a million dollars yet. I haven't been super successful yet. Whoever defines that. And therefore I'm not good enough, so I can't do this. And people won't believe me, they won't like me, they won't respect me. All that garbage, right, that goes on in your head. So what ends up happening? Well, for most people, they don't talk, they don't speak, they back off, they do something else, they get distracted, so they never pursue what it is they really want to do. I believe that every single one of you has a gift, a gift of important information, Knowledge to share, a sensitivity, a skill, something to share with the world. And I truly believe that for all these 25 plus years I've worked with people. So understand, the little voice may not necessarily be the truth. May not be the truth. So, Anant, here's a couple things you can do to quash this little voice. First thing is. Well, a lot of them are. A couple of them are affirmations. You know what an affirmation is? It's personal, present tense and positive. So you can say, I Like myself. I like myself. But you say it more than once, I like myself. I like myself. And what happens is your brain begins to shift a little bit. That one affirmation, I probably say it 20 times a day. A day. Sometimes out loud, sometimes not. Sometimes. So a little affirmation. It's called thought replacement. Very big in little voice mastery. So you replace that thought with I like myself, number one. Number two is make a list. Make a list of all the things that you are good at in your life. And just make a list. I'm good at. I'm a good father, I'm a good husband, I'm a good. I'm a good cricket player or I'm good at breathing. Anything, you know, it doesn't. It does. It doesn't matter how insignificant it is. But make the list. The list is what import is important. So you got to provide what I call irrefutable evidence as to why you are good enough. You are good. You're good enough because. And so the list is the things that you do well. Okay, I'm very real, I'm very authentic. I'm very. And go through that list, write it all down and then repeat it to yourself. And just notice how you feel after you say it. You say, yeah, but I'm not rich enough. Okay, let that go. Thank you. Then I'll say. Then the third thing. Is this not good enough in relationship to what? Okay, if you're trying to be a speaker, for example, and you say, well, I'm not good enough. I'm teaching property or real estate, and I haven't made millions of dollars in property or real estate yet. I understand, but understand that also your target audience is going to typically be people that, that have not accomplished as much as you are. So if you've come from here to here, okay, this is how far you've come, okay, and you've come from here to here, and you feel like you need to go over to here, okay, that's fine. So you're here, right? But understand that the other people that you're talking to are right here, so you're way ahead of them. Does that make sense? So, and I'm going to ask you which audience is bigger? I mean, you're not going to talk to the Kiyosakis and the Donald Trumps about And the Ken McElroys of the world about property for sure, because they've got many years and many numbers ahead of you. However, the people you're going to be talking to are the millions and millions of people that read Rich Dad, Poor dad or some other book where they got inspired by the idea of property investing or financial freedom through investing. Does that make sense? So you got to put. Because the little voice will lie to you, you're not good enough. Why am I not good enough? I'm good enough. I'm good enough for 50 million people to talk to you. I'm just not good enough for about 20. Understand? You understand. So again, a lot of this is a writing process, creating evidence. I like myself. I got this. And to continue to push through it even though you're not you. You think you're not good enough. Take it on a bite at a time. Anyway, so hopefully that helps a little bit. All right, who do we got here? Fear of. Okay. Fear of cold calling. Fear of cold selling. Sorry, Fear of cold selling. Okay. Fear of cold selling. By the way, when it comes to little voice issues, most. Most of the issues revolve around the same issue, the fear of people not liking. You see, when. When Anan is saying fear of not being good enough, that may be the issue, but beneath that issue, it might be, well, if people find out that I don't, I'm not good enough, they're not going to like me. And that's core issue. Remember I read somewhere, I'm not sure where it was, is that the fear of public speaking is greater than the fear of death. Death is number three on the list. Number one is public speaking. Number two is rejection by your peers. Now think about number two. Number two is rejection by your peers, which really is a subset of number one. The difference in number one being, you know, fear of public speaking is you can be rejected by not only your peers, but the world. Okay? So the issue is people not approving of you. So that sits below everything. And I would tell you that if there's one thing that kills dreams, if there's one thing that keeps people broke, if there's one thing that busts up relationships, it's that one right there. You know, the fear of people not liking you. Why? Well, because we are creatures, as Brene Brown says, we are creatures of connection. We want to be connection. And the worst thing that could happen to a person is to be ostracized or pushed out from their group. Rejected by the group because it's a core pain. That's a core pain. Making a mistake, for example. Making mistakes. Nobody likes making them. But making mistakes aren't so bad because you learn. But the real issue under the fear of making a mistake is you're going to look bad, you're going to look stupid, you're going to be embarrassed. People might not like you. Okay, so cold selling, so the fear of rejection, that somebody's gonna say no to you, so they say no to you. So you go to the next person. If you look at cold selling as a pro, as an experimental process. An experimental process, that's right. In other words, you haven't. That person you're cold selling has not earned the right to have a relationship with you yet. You don't have a relationship with them, they don't have a relationship with you. You don't know. All you're doing is testing whether you could have one. That's all. So when you go up to somebody and say, excuse me, you can say something like this. You say, I'm from ABC company and we've worked with several companies similar to yours and help them increase their sales by about 15% in a matter of weeks. Is that something you might be interested in? He go, get out of here. Okay, good. Thank you. Okay, so then you do it again. Yeah, get out of here. We're not interested in salespeople. Okay, thank you. Okay. And just keep doing it until you find the formula. It works. So it's. It's impersonal. Now, how do you make it impersonal? Get in front of a mirror and practice it about 150 times. I tell speakers sometimes to stand in front of a mirror and demand that the other person give you $25,000 for three minutes of your time. $25,000 for three minutes of your time. And when you can stop hesitating, when you can stop laughing, when you stop crying, then you will have deadened the sensitivity. We have. We used to have. I think we still have. It is an objection handling kit designed exactly for cold selling. And what we would do is it's a series of flashcards. And on the flashcard there's an objection like I'm too busy or you're too expensive or whatever it is. And the. And the g. And on the back there's some answers, but that's not the purpose of the exercise. The purpose of the exercise, if you listen to how I teach you to do it, is you do it again and again and again until you don't hesitate, you don't stammer. You're just able to follow it with an acknowledgement and a question. That's it. Don't even try to solve it. So it's like somebody says, I'm not interested. Thank you. Why not? Thank you. So what's the problem with that? You guys get out of here. Thank you. Am I doing something to offend you? So again, all it is is a game in your brain with an acknowledgement. Thank you. And a question. Acknowledge your question. Now there comes a point where you just let it go for sure because it's not going to go anywhere. But the point of the. Why am I saying this? Because. Because the point of the exercise is not to have a snappy comeback to an objection. The point of the exercise, listen closely, is to deaden the reactivity of your little voice to when they say no to you. Because the problem is when somebody says no in a cold selling environment, your emotion tends to go up, as is probably the case. Cause you're not making cold selling. Cause you're afraid of it, right? So. So your emotion goes up and your intelligence goes down. So you can't think. Your brain disengages from your tongue, literally. Some people go into blah, blah, blah, blah, blah mode. They don't even know what they're talking about. And other people go into goldfish, which is like they can't. Their brain disengages from their tongue and they don't even know what to say. So in that moment, you can't. You're helpless. Your little voice has completely hijacked you. You're in total fear. Nothing can work. So answer, Practice, practice. By the way, every little voice technique, whether it's in the book or it's in the new 21 day challenge, requires some practice. Now the good news is you don't have to practice it every day. Two hours a day for, you know, 40 days. No, just a couple of minutes each day. And as it comes up, you practice it, do it again and again. If there's one you really want to work on, you do it in front of a mirror or you do it, better yet to role play with another person. Okay, so the fear of cold selling is really the fear that they're not going to like you. If you take the relationship out of the formula, at least in the beginning, then you can eliminate that. But the way you do that is by simply being very clinical and just work the game. Treat like the game is. How long can I stay in this conversation with this person before it becomes clearer that they just don't want to talk to me? Okay, so hopefully that helped. I mean, there's more to it than that. We do have a lot of drills you can do. But the objection handling kit pretty cool because like I said, it's the objection and the rule is, if I say you're too expensive, then you got to come back and say, thank you, but why do you think it's too expensive? Or something. But if you say. If I say you're too expensive and you go. When you say or you hesitate, I go, stop. Now, in real life, it's okay to hesitate, but in the drill, you say stop. Because that's your little voice. Just hijacked you for a second, right? Just hijacked you. Okay, and then I'll do it again. You're too expensive. Thank you, but I stop. Your product is too expensive. I stop. Your product is too expensive. Thank you, but I got. Stop. Your product is too expensive. Thank you. But why do you think it's too expensive? Good. High five. Go to the next one. So what did I just do? By repetition, in a very short. Listen to me closely. In a very short period of time, you get rid of a fear that could keep you. That may be keeping you broke for years. Okay? So practice, practice, practice, practice. Okay. All right. Let's see what else we got. Good evening. Some people don't understand early days of entrepreneurship and things you need to do. How to handle the pressure from outside influences. Okay. How to handle the pressure from outside influence. And here's another one. Fear of a wasted effort. Oh, I can't wait to get to that one. Fear of wasted effort. But the other one was entrepreneurship. Okay. How to handle pressure from outside influences. Okay. Napoleon Hill said it really well. He said that he divides the world into two people. He says they're people that are directed. They have direction of purpose. They know what they're doing. They know where they're going, and they're not distracted. Then he says there's other people that he calls drifters, and they're easily distracted. They don't have control of their minds. They're controlled for a very short period of time. Then they get distracted over here and get distracted over there. And that same. It's kind of what you're describing with entrepreneurship. Why the distractions are easy for a new entrepreneur is because you don't know what you're doing yet, which is normal. Most of us don't. What am I doing? What do I do next? What I do first? What do I do second? What do I do third? Why is this not working? Maybe I'm not cut out for this, all that little voice stuff. Right? So what's the answer to it? Well, the answer. The answer is direction of purpose. Do you have a mission? Do you have a Purpose. Do you have a strong reason why? Have you written these things down? Do you keep them in front of you all the time? Do you keep talking about it? Like, for me, our mission is to produce the best teachers, leaders and facilitators in the world, particularly in the area of entrepreneurship. I mean, and that's been doing that for quite a few years now. And so when I start to get distracted, I go, is this on purpose? Is this part of the mission? Keeps you on focus even if you're just starting? Even if you're just starting, you know, and I think that you will, and every new entrepreneur will face defeat and setbacks and all those things. But the difference is you don't let the defeat distract you. It's kind of like the universe, God or the marketplace, whatever you want to call it, is continually testing you. Continually testing. It's always throwing curveballs, always throwing things at you to, to see if it can throw you off course and distract you with something else. If it can distract you and say, that's not. You shouldn't be doing that. You should be doing this. Then you go over there and then you should be doing this, you should be doing that. All of a sudden you're like a ping pong ball out there, okay? And you're not getting anything done. And then your goals become smaller and smaller and smaller until you're just adrift out there. So how do you avoid the distractions of entrepreneurship and understand that it's hard work and that little voice? Well, simply by write yourself a little card and hang it somewhere. Go. No distractions. Write the word distractions. Draw a line through it. Stay focused. Set goals. Set goals. Not five year goals, not even one year goals. Set three month goals. This is my goal. Make sure it's on purpose. Then you do. We have an amazing goal setting program. And if you follow the program, you'll isolate 15, I believe, 15 goals in three areas of your life. And within a few minutes, you'll be able to narrow it down to the one goal that you need to achieve in order to satisfy yourself, your spirit, everything around you, the goal that you really want. I think one of the other things, my friend, is to avoid distractions is to make sure you're doing what you want to do, not what other people tell you you should do or what you feel obligated to what your family says you should do. All that kind of stuff, okay? These are all ways of avoiding the little voices of distraction and staying on purpose. Like I said, if you're interested, we have A if you go to blairsinger.com get started. We have an amazing goal setting program and we have a lot of trainers all over the world to teach it to you in a few moments. And with that, it'll eliminate a lot of the distractions. Okay, let's see what else we got. Mother of all fears. Fear that we shall succeed. Fear of success. Okay, so let me go to fear of success. Okay, let me write that one down. That's a good one. Thank you. No distractions. David Belforwolf. That's right. No distraction, my friend. Even in Melbourne, Australia. Okay. Fear of a wasted effort. Okay, well, it's a legitimate fear. And you know what? You're going to waste your efforts. I'm just going to give you the bad news. It's going to happen and it's going to happen more than once. And it may happen a lot of times, but that's called testing. Anybody that's in marketing knows that you're. That a lot of what you try is not going to work until you find something that does work. So there are going to be. But it's not a wasted effort. I would say the little voice, the little voice technique for handling the fear of a wasted effort is to understand that it's not a wasted effort, it's a test. And the minimum. Sometimes what appears to be a wasted effort turns out to be one of the biggest, most powerful learning experiences that you could possibly have. Okay. Many years ago, when I was teaching, when I first started to teach and I got up in front of a room and I really didn't know, I really didn't know what I was talking about. And I got high. I got jumped by the participants in the room and they just, I mean, they just literally started heckling and yelling and you know, it was a mess. It was just, just trust me, it was a mess. And it was. And I'm thinking to myself, whose idea was this to be speaking anyway? What? Talk about a failed effort. I mean, it was not only fail, failure. I mean, it was humiliating. But it turned out to be the most valuable effort of my life. It wasn't what I thought. I thought I was getting a fanfare, a standing ovation, all that stuff. I didn't get any of that. I got crushed. But what I learned is how much I had to learn, number one. Number two, I had to go back to my business and fix it so I could really earn the right to teach what I wanted to teach. And when I came back to teach a year or two later, I was a completely different person. So it was. So I don't believe in wasted efforts. It's kind of like saying day is better than night or night is better than day, or up is better than down, or down is better than in or out, you know? See, Dr. Fuller said, unity is plural. At a minimum of two, they gotta come together, right? So they have to coexist. You will have wasted efforts. But you can always tell yourself, look, at the minimum, I'm gonna learn something here. At the minimum, I'm gonna learn something here. Now, hopefully you do that early and often before you have a lot of money on the line, okay? But if you're. If you haven't been doing it in smaller circumstances, it can be more difficult when you have bigger circumstances, if that makes sense. So, again, little voice issue. There's no such thing as a wasted effort. There is always something to learn, and learn it quick. That way you don't prolong the agony. Okay. All right, let's see here. What's the next one? No distractions. Got that? Fear of success. Yeah, I'd do that one right now. It's all learning experience. That's right, David. Left foot, right foot. Not right foot, wrong foot. David. You should be teaching this class, by the way, David Belfer, Bear, Wolf. Melbourne, Australia. It's sometime in the. Early in the morning there, and David and I. So you could. I'm not even gonna tell him. David. Type in the chat box. When we first met, the year we first met, and so people can see that while I'm talking about some other stuff here, it's all learning experience. So fear of success. Somebody, you're going, how's that a little voice issue? Fear of success. I mean, bring it, bring it. I can take as much success as you can give me. I'll take success all day long. Well, not so fast, because as a person said, fear of success. There you go. 1993. 1993. We looked a lot different then, didn't we, David? And he's been a great friend. He's been part. He's part of our Blair Singer training academy. An amazing trainer, and he also owns great, great salon in Melbourne, Australia. So if you're there, if you're in Australia, go check him out. He and his team, they're amazing and make you look beautiful, but he's an amazing personal development trainer as well. Okay, so success, success. So not so fast, right? That's what I was saying. Not so fast. Because, you know, the fear of success, what would happen if you had unlimited success? What if you said, you know, I want to make. I want to make $150,000 this year. I want to. I want to have a really nice car, blah, blah, and you got it. And what happens if you got it? Or let's say you set a goal for yourself, a really big one, and you got it, what would happen? You would have. You'd be happy, hopefully. But what's the next thought? Oh, my God, I don't know. What if I have to do that again? Now I'm visible, now people can see me. Now what do I do? And so what happens is, like I said, little voice is real sneaky. Remember? What's the purpose? To keep you safe. That's right. Keep you safe. Because if you have success, are you bigger or you're smaller? You're bigger, right? You're bigger, you're more exposed. More people see you, you attract more things. And by the way, just as your presence gets bigger, law of attraction says you will attract more things into your life. More money, more love, more people, all that stuff. And negative things, too. It'll attract more scoundrels, more thieves, more betrayal, more. All that stuff. See, because the law of attraction doesn't know the difference between good things and bad things. Just like the sun doesn't know a positive meteorite from a negative meteorite. It attracts all of that, right? So what happens is, intuitively your little voice, your mindset, your consciousness knows that. So it's like, if I really got. If I really get big, then what's going to happen? You know? Then I'm exposed. And what if they find out I'm not as good as they think I am, and what if I can't repeat it and blah, blah, blah, all that stuff. I'll give you a personal example. Years ago, I was doing some work with a very dear, powerful coach of mine. Her name is Seal Stanford, and she's a processor. In other words, she. Whenever I have a little voice issue that comes up that I cannot resolve, I call her and she takes me through a process to find out where it came from and pull it apart so it doesn't run my life anymore. Very powerful. So we were working together and it came up that my marketing really sucks, by the way. It's not much better. It's a little bit better now. But my marketing, I mean, I did zero. No market. I would never even think doing something like this. But I travel around the world and I speak and that. And my marketing sucks. And she. And so as she processed it, what it came down to was it came down to the fact that somewhere inside that if I expose myself and made myself really successful to the entire world, now I'm exposed. And what if they find out that I'm not as good as they think I am? Or what do they find out? I'm not an uber, Uber millionaire, or what do they find? All this stuff that came up and it all stemmed back to a. An experience in Australia. By the way, in Australia, years ago, Robert Kim and I, both, all three of us, and we were on it. Basically. We were featured on an expose. Four Corners, I think is the name of the program. It's like 60 Minutes in America. It's a news documentary. And they were doing a news documentary on cults. C U L T S Cults. And I didn't know that. We just thought we were going to get some great publicity. And as the thing came on, I was in Australia watching it. As it came on, I go, oh my God. They have me standing there with my arms outstretched like this and that. You can't hear what I'm saying. But it says across the caption here, it says, blair singer, cult leader. And it was like, oh, my gosh. And I was probably doing about a half a million dollars worth of corporate training business. This is back in the. In the 90s, which was a lot of business at the time, in the mid-90s, and everything shut down. Everything. I mean, it was like Robert. We had to close all the centers we were doing. Robert went off to Bisbee, Arizona and built a house and went into hibernation. And I got off the speaking circuit. And so it left a scar in there. A scar that. What happens when you get successful now, it's a whole different story. But that thought I had forgotten all. You know, I had worked on it years ago and I'd forgotten all about it. But when she worked with me, the little voice had created a fear of success. A fear of success that if I ever got that successful again, bad things would happen to you. And of course, the little voice is trying to protect you. Okay? So if you now that you. So, by the way, all of you listening to this right now, okay, the mere fact that I'm exposing some of these things to you takes you from being unconscious to being conscious. So that's half the battle. See, because most people, the little voice goes, you're not good enough. You can't do this, all that stuff. And they don't know why. They just think there's something wrong with them, which is another little voice. There's something. There's nothing wrong with you. You're just not aware. Okay? Now, as a result of this stream, you're aware. So you have a choice now as to whether you're going to let the little voice, that fear of success, the fear of failure, the fear people not liking you, fear of not being good enough, which are all the things we've talked about so far tonight. Today you have the choice as to whether you're going to let those continue to run on autopilot, which is what happens for 99% of most people, or you can read little voice mastery. Take the challenge, get some good coaching and get past it and have the life you really want to have and get on with it. Now you're saying to yourself, well, there's other people that don't have this problem. Everybody's got. Everybody's got little voices. It may turn out that somebody doesn't have a little. Those same kind of little voice issues around making money, but maybe they do around relationships, maybe they do around their health, maybe they do around cooperation. You don't know. I don't know, and you don't know. But there's nobody that is exempt from little voices. There are a few people that know how to master them and how to keep their mission and their goals and their purpose in front of them and how to. And to use the little voice mastery techniques to keep them out. Okay, so hopefully that helps. Let's see what else we got here. Let's see. A, B, C, D, E, F. More drama. How could. How can we. You make me blush. Oh, I. It's hard. I'm not making you blush. How can we pass the past, the fear? Okay. How do you pass the fear? Okay, I'll get to that. Past fear. Let me see what else we got here. When your goals keep you busy and you have limited time for family. All right. Too busy. It's a good one. I love this. You love the story. Which one? The one about getting. About getting cremated in front of a room. You like that one or you like the one about the cult leader? I mean, I got lots of stories. I think the only reason I'm able to teach is because I have screwed up so many times. Whoever said being afraid of a wasted effort. None of them were wasted efforts. None. Not. Not even one. Not even one. I mean, at the time, it seemed like a total waste and a total mistake. I'll admit that. But you know what? It makes you who you are if you keep going. Of course it makes you who you are if you quit, too. So that is also who you are. Okay. All right, so question here. Passing fear. How to get past fear? Okay, well, fear of what I guess is the first thing we all face, fear. The great lecturer, psychologist Jordan Peterson says we all face the fear. And what he says is your best bet with fear is to take it on anyway, even though you're petrified. Because even if you fail at whatever you're trying, you will personally feel better about it. And I thought that was really interesting and I agree with it 100% that there are other techniques. But the first one is when you're facing fear and the fear is standing between you and what you really want. Now, I'm not a big believer in doing things just for the sake of getting past fear. I mean, you can. And there are some people, pit bulls and high drive aggressive people that will do that. And there's value to that. But beyond that, if it's in between you and where you want to go, and you know that, I wouldn't change my purpose for it. I would take it on slowly but surely, even though it may be a little painful because you're going to. At the minimum, even if you fail, like he says, you will feel better about yourself and that will allow you to grow and take on the next fear a little bit easier. So that's the first thing I want to say about passing fear. I think the other thing about fear is you guys say, fear of what? Okay, fear of what other people think. That's a big one. Fear of looking stupid. That's the same one. The fear that nobody's going to listen to you. Nobody's going to like, you see the patterns. It's still the same one fear. You're going to lose a lot of money. Okay, what's the real fear behind that? Well, that you're going to let other people down. So again, a lot of this is about other people, how other people see you understand, you're getting. Are you getting the drift here? So know that as human beings, I don't know that a squirrel or a rabbit or a deer has the same fear. They have fear predators, okay, but you know they're going to chew them up and eat them. But I don't think they're afraid. I don't think they have a fear of another deer. Maybe they do. I don't know. But you know what I'm saying. But our incessant fear of what other people think or what other people might do to us or think about us is the key. And I and I think that by working on that and understanding that that's what it is and saying. Keep saying things. I like myself. I love myself. You know, I, you know, I'm a, you know, if you're afraid of selling, I'm great in sales and give people exactly what they want and need. Freight of business. I'm an awesome. I'm an awesome innovator in business. You know, I'm a master of income and profit. Whatever. Whatever affirmations you can do to override, override, override, override. And what you'll find, I'll give you whoever wrote that in, I will tell you this. I'll bet you when you were four years old, there were things you're afraid of, you were really afraid of that you're no longer afraid of. Right? I'll bet you there are things that maybe you're afraid of riding a bicycle, or maybe you're afraid of walking to school by yourself or whatever that was. But, you know what? Are you afraid of that now? No. Why? Because you went through it. You had to, and you got bigger. So there's an expression. I don't even know what religion or spirituality it comes from, but it goes like this. It says, this too shall pass. This too shall pass. You should write that down. This too shall pass. And that's on the positive and negative side. So if you have a fear of something that you have to do, just keep telling yourself, this will pass. It will pass. You'll be through it, and you'll be on the other side of it. By the way, that's also true of good things, okay? Because, you know, you have this major success. But if you tell yourself, this too shall pass. And. And not to take yourself down, because that's another whole issue. But the fact of the matter is it'll. It'll keep you from crashing after a big high. As too shall pass. And we'll be back into the. And it's all about waves, okay? So getting past that fear. All right, what's the other one? The other one. Let me check here. How do we connect the little voice with unresolved emotional issues, especially from childhood? Okay. How to keep your participants engaged in a virtual environment. Okay, so let me see. Virtual environment. How to keep engaged. Okay, so how to keep engaged. Okay, that's a good one. The other one is too busy. And the other one was what? How to connect. Oh, emotional issues to childhood. Okay, That's a lot. Wow. It's a lot of therapy, man. It's a lot of therapy. Okay, so here we go too busy. Okay, so you ready for this can of worms? This may not be what you want to hear. Okay, so I'm too busy as an entrepreneur. You're busy. You're busy. You work 24. 7 with COVID 19. We all go online, and we get busier. Actually get busier for somewhat less money in some cases, too. Right. So that's a very common deal. So how do I, you know, why. Why am I having problems? You know, I. I need to take care of my business because I got to make money, but I want to be with my family. How am I going to do that? So be careful is what I'm going to say about this one. And the reason I'm going to say be careful is because of my own experience. Okay? And the experience is this, is that I travel around the world for many, many years. I'm just gonna be very authentic and honest with you, if that's okay. That's okay. Type in okay. Okay. You know, for many years. I mean, since 1990, probably. I mean, so how many years is that? That's like almost 30 years of traveling, traveling, traveling over 40 countries around the world. Event here, event here, event here. My wife and I have a code of honor. We speak every day. You. Before we had kids, she used to travel with me. Then in 95, when. When Ben was born, that stopped. And I. But I kept the traveling going. And. And I remember I was working with a very dear friend of mine who's in Hawaii doing an event. Hawaii, right. I mean, Hawaii doing an event. We're sitting by. We're having lunch, and we're sitting there by the. By the ocean in Kaanapali. And this came up, and he said to me, he said something very interesting. He said. I said, you know, I don't. I don't have. I said the exact same thing. I don't seem to have time with my family, and I'm traveling a lot. He goes. And he looked at me. He goes, blair, so what are you running away from? What? I didn't even hear it. He says, blair, I'm going to ask you again. What are you running away from? What? And I never looked at it that way. I never looked at it that way. And so I just noticed that you might want to take a look at this. That deep inside, this is another level of little voice is that sometimes your busyness is a drug. No different than cocaine, no different than alcohol. It's something that you find shelter in. It's something that you go to, because the other Stuff sometimes may be a little too stressful or maybe the fear of being broke or the fear of going broke is so, so crazy that, you know, if you keep yourself working hard, then you'll know that you're at least doing the best you can. So you're. You're addicted to it. Okay? I had a coach, I currently have a coaching client from the Philippines, and he had the same thing. He has the same thing going on. He was his. He was overweight. He's a brilliant marketer, great marketer. He was overweight. He was not getting enough sleep. He's irritable. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Go, how much sleep you get? Because he said, you know, I hadn't slept in 24 hours. He was kind of proud of it. I'm going, dude, what is the problem here? He goes, well, I got this to do, that to do. I go, look, I'm going to give you an assignment, a 30 day challenge. And the 30 day challenge is you're going to get a minimum of 7 hours sleep every day, single night. He goes, I can't do that. I go, why can't you? Because. Do you have a team? Yeah. Okay, can they do it? Well, I said, just try, try it. And so he wrote back to me two days ago. And he goes, I have never felt more refreshed in my life. My team is on fire. I've been getting a minimum of seven hours sleep, sometimes eight. I feel so much more refreshed, so much easier now to exercise and go do all the things. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, Right? You just had to unplug it. You just have to unplug it. Because the truth is, is if you don't have enough time, first of all, you probably don't have a team. So you need to put a team together. But from a little voice perspective, I'm going to ask you what my friend Larry, his name is Larry Gillman. If you have a chance to work with him, he's an amazing human being, you can look him up. Larry Gilman is that. He said to me, he goes, blair, what are you running away from? And what I realized I was running for my solitude. I was running to a place where I knew if I'm by myself, if I can do things on my own, I can command my own destiny. I don't have to answer to anybody else. I'm being honest. And at that point, I sat back and I had to take a look at my life. How many things in my past over all the years When I got out of school, when I graduated from the Ohio State University, you know the story. Some of you have been with me. I went to Hawaii, as far away from my family as you could possibly get. I left, never came back. I mean, I'm very close with my family, but I never came back. So I left there. I now live in Arizona. I lived in Lake Tahoe. Hardly ever any family around. I never noticed it. But here's the reason why there's a good and a bad. The reason I'm too busy. It's not that I'm too busy. The reason is because for me, I needed to have the ability to think for myself and to hang around with the people that would influence me to get what I wanted out of life. And unfortunately for a lot of us, you can't. There's. Family members can provide that sometimes. Sometimes family members provide the exact opposite. So a part of mastering your little voice is the other big piece is who you surround yourself with. Who you surround yourself with. So if you're just buried in your business because you just got to get your business across, get yourself a fricking team. Get a bookkeeper. If you're working alone, get yourself a bookkeeper, a personal assistant at the minimum, and start spending more time if that's what you want to do. But if you're doing it for another reason, be honest about that. Have a conversation with your spouse and with your family and reconcile it. Because we don't do things for no reason. There is no no reason. Okay. So hopefully that helps you a little bit. And I'm happy to say with COVID 19, I've spent a lot of time with my family, and it's been awesome. It's been amazing. Except when the dogs outside start barking incessantly, and then I can't do any broadcasting. Okay. Somebody asked how to keep an audience engaged in a virtual environment. Okay, so I was just on a podcast about this this morning, actually. Here's the thing. The worst thing a speaker can do. You can write this down. The worst thing. The worst possible thing you could do is not. Not know something. It's not. Not have successes. You know what it is? It's being boring. Boring. Boring. Boring is the worst thing that you can do to anybody, live or online, is to be boring. Why? Because people. Because you turn people off. They. They. They check out, and you're abusing their time. They want somebody that has some inflection in their voice. They have some excitement in what they're doing. They're charged up about Things, and I tell people online, this is what I said this morning, is that the camera, this camera right here will not make you any less boring. Okay? If you're boring offline in the way you speak and the way you gesture and the way you talk and at what you're talking about, then you put yourself on camera. All you did was put yourself under a microscope. All it does is magnify the boringness. It doesn't make you any better. Okay? If you have a weak voice, this microphone here doesn't make your voice stronger. It magnifies the weakness. It's louder, but it's not a stronger voice. Okay? So to realize if you're trying, if you're not keeping participants engaged, the first place to look is over here. Am I engaging? Am I, am I excited? Am I using gestures? Am I looking at people in the camera? Am I, am I having a good time? Am I excited about what I'm talking about? These are critical. Then there's other techniques, of course. There's like, type in the chat box. Give me a thumbs up. How does this make sense? Does it make sense? Type in Ms. In the chat box. How many have you ever done this? How many of you know that? You know, we just did a program called Powerful Sales Presentations last weekend in which we, I think we broke the mold, we broke some of the zoom barriers, the people that you can't do that in an online environment. And we were doing some crazy, amazing, powerful stuff online. So there's a lot of things you can do to engage if you know how to do them and if you're bold enough to do it. I mean, I have people screaming and yelling into the cameras. And, you know, and we set very strict rules in the very beginning. I need your face in front of the camera. I need your. I need you to be fully attentive. No other distractions. If you're, if you're doing something else and we see it, somebody's going to send you a text message and that's a $2 fine. Okay? Now, you don't have to do that, but that's part of the way. I've done all my programs for many, many years. So again, if you're trying to engage an audience, their little voices are moving 20 times faster than you are. So you have got to stay a half a step ahead of them all the time. All the time, typically asking lots of questions. But don't be boring. That's probably the most important thing. And if you're interested in more of those techniques, go to my YouTube channel. YouTube channel. I go through a lot of techniques on big mistakes that people make making presentations and how to overcome. There's a whole video series on that. If you go to blursinger.com there are a whole series of videos on training techniques and how to do all that stuff. But hopefully that helps for right now. Okay, what was that? Let's see, what was the other one? Something about being emotional. Once again, I realized the business people are excellent therapists. Busyness indeed is an addiction. Good, good, good, good, good. I'm glad you can see that. It is for me, by the way, you know what it is for me? This was a big aha for me as I'm looking for. The big one for me is teaching. Teaching is an addiction. I get in front of a camera, I get in front of a camera, I get in front of a room. I'm good. Okay. And so it's like, where can I teach? Where can I teach? Where can I teach? Where can I teach? Where can I teach? It almost becomes an obsession and addiction and is an escape from something else. What am I running away from? Not that it's bad to run away from some things. If you're an abusive environment, you should run away from that for sure. I mean, if you're in an environment that's stifling your creativity, you want to run away from. Want to get away from that as well. Obviously you want to communicate why you're doing what you're doing. But, you know, I think that everybody's got their own little. I have a friend, Josh Lannan. Josh and Lisa Lannan. They have a drug treatment clinic for wounded warriors people and first. First responders, like firefighters and law enforcement. And they treat addiction, PTSD, and a lot of that stuff. And he's. And his point is this. Everybody, everybody, every human being has an addiction. Everybody does. And the sooner you feel. And what I'm going to say to that is that the sooner you find out what it is and come to grips with it, just like an Alcoholic's Anonymous is, the first thing you do is to admit that you're addicted to it. Then you can have some control over your own thoughts rather than just running on autopilot. Let's see here, here. How do we connect with the little voice of unresolved. Ah, here it is. Unresolved emotional issues, especially from childhood. Okay, so the easy way. Walter Green, this is the question I've been looking forward to. Okay, Walter Green, good to see you. From Ohio. Good. Good to see. Good to see you. On the stream every. I hope you know what he's talking about. What they're talking about is that we have lots of decisions that we make and the little voices are created or reinforced by experiences that we have in our past. Right? So. And sometimes we don't know that or we don't know it at the time. And it's not until. I always use an example. If you loaned money to somebody, they did not pay you back and it upsets you. You know, you're upset, okay? But time passes, you forget about it. You don't think about it. Now, let's say you and I are friends and we're. And let's say we've been friends now for a couple of years. And it's really good. We have a really good working relationship. But I come to you and I say, look, if you can loan me about five or six grand, five or six thousand dollars, I'll be happy to pay you back as soon as I can. Now, if you were burned before, what are you thinking right now? You're thinking, no way. And immediately our relationship changes, doesn't it? All of a sudden you don't trust me quite as much. You kind of distance yourself a little bit. And here's the point. Has nothing to do with me. It has to do with an earlier experience, as this person said. An earlier experience that left a mark. It left a mark. Subconsciously, you're not thinking. You don't think about it all day, but it left a mark. And so all I had to do is say a couple of few words. Could you loan me. Could you loan me some monies? Six words. And it triggered this whole thing. Okay, how do you get rid of that? First of all, I don't know about you. I probably got a. I figure I have a lot of that stuff. I don't even know what I have. I don't even know what's going on up there half the time. That's why early on in the mid-80s, I started seeking out the best teachers and coaches I could find who are professional at digging into, getting into, finding those incidences. You know, I mentioned Seal, Stanford, she's one of them, and her whole team. And Nicole is part of that team in South Africa. And people all over the world, they're trained in how to do that. Jane Johnson, who I've known for almost 30 years, who's been one of my coaches, these are amazing people that are schooled in not giving any advice. No advice, no education, very little education. But simply know what questions to ask. So that you can unravel those experiences in your life, you can rediscover those and resolve them and get on with your life. And that's priceless. And I say that anybody in business going forward from the 2000 and twenties on, that's not doing personal development, processing, clearing or coaching is just not going to be nearly as effective as other people. They may have some momentary success, but if somebody said they may not be able to handle the success or, or they may sabotage themselves with the success because it's another thing that happens of fear of success is you sabotage it. You sabotage it because it brings you back to normal. And at least you're upset, but at least you're comfortable, or at least your little voice is comfortable. So again, I would seek coaching. I would seek coaching. As you do more coaching, you can do it yourself and you can say, oh, I know, where did this come from? When did I ever feel like this before? When did I ever feel like this before? Ah, there's an experience a couple days ago. When did I ever feel like this before that? Oh, maybe about, I remember about eight years ago. Might I feel. Oh, I remember I was about 10 years. See, and you can go very quickly go through a regression where you can find. You could say that's where that happened. That's not enough though, because if you just do that now, well, now I got an excuse. Now I got an excuse. No, it's not about getting excuses. It's about going back and going. Okay, that's where it started. Now, as I am today, how would I hand if, if I, if, if the blankety blank year old Blair, year old Blair, we're standing there with 10 year old Blair. What would I, how would I handle it? I would handle it way differently. Right. And that's what you got to do is you got to go back to the incident repro. How would you handle it? Resolve it and move forward and then, then all the rest of the stuff falls away. Okay. All right, good. Let's see here. Any more? We're gonna start wrapping up here. This has been good. Yeah, I love doing low voice stuff. Let's see. But isn't teaching also something you highly value and love doing? Yes, Patty Lamp. I love doing it. I love doing it. It's a good thing I do. But you know, not to demean it because I don't think I'm ever going to stop doing it. But I can stop doing it as an addiction. I can do it because of something that needs to be done and not be so obsessed. I got to do it. I got to do it. I got to do it. I got to go. I got to go. I got to go do another call. I got to do. You know that at that point, it becomes too much. Becomes too much. And to understand that I know it's an addiction and knowing it is major piece of the battle for me, of course, it adds a lot of value. Thank goodness it does. Right? Be horrible to have an addiction that hurts people. That. And some people do, but it adds value to people's lives. But I also want all my life to work, not just my career life. I want my family life to work. I want my health to be good. I want all those things to work. Okay, let's see. Yeshma from Hong Kong. Good to see you. Very good to see you. Okay, so again, thanks, you guys, for being part of this streaming today and working on your little voice. There's way more little voices to come. And we'll work and next week, we'll work on some. We'll talk about something new. But there's always room. Because what I'm going to tell you is that anything that is stopping you right now has very little to do with anything other than your own resistance. And your own resistance is the little voice. And just remember, it was designed to protect you. You got to ask yourself, do I really need that protection anymore? I'm a big person now. I can handle it. And the worst that can happen is I'm going to get smarter. I'm going to get smarter, I'm going to get wiser, and I'm going to be able to help more people. Okay? So thanks, you guys. Thanks for a great hour. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Give somebody a high five. Have a great weekend. Give at least four people a hug and say, I like myself. All right. Be awesome.