Blair Singer (author/speaker) gives a short, practical talk on handling feelings of guilt and negative self-talk. He recommends two main exercises: 1) write a long, exaggerated list of all the "should'ves/could'ves" until they look ridiculous (a "repeater process" that burns out the negative voice); and 2) if guilt persists, speak the guilty thought aloud while holding a push-up position and stay there as long as you want to hold the guilt, releasing it when you collapse. The tone is direct, informal, and instructional.
Hi, this is Blair Singer, author of Little Voice Mastery and founding contributor to Radical wealth, here to talk to you about a technique that we're all guilty of, a Little Voice issue. We're all guilty of the should'ves, the would'ves, and the could'ves. How many times have you ever second guessed yourself, I should have gone to the gym. I should have called my mom. If I could have made a few more sales calls, blah, blah, blah, all that stuff right now. Every time you do that, you cut your power down. You keep cutting yourself in half. So when the should have or could'ves start chirping in your brain, here's a little exercise. If they're incessant in there, here's what you do. You take a piece of paper and you just sit down and you write down all the things you could have or should have done and just make a huge list. And here's what I want you to do. I want you to be as whiny and as miserable and as victim Mentality. Ished. If that's a word that you can be, write it down. I could have gone to the gym today. I could have made more money today. I could have been smarter today. I could have been prettier today. I could have been faster. Whatever it is, just write them all down and just write as many down as you can until after a while, you just look at them and going, this is ridiculous. Because it is ridiculous, but it takes sometimes emptying all that stuff out of your brain and looking at it going through. When you exhaust those, go through them and just review them and see how ridiculous they look. And if you're not ridiculous enough for you, say, I could have called my mom. And I didn't call my mom because I'm a jerk. I'm a terrible person. I'm this, I'm that. Just go overboard with it until you get to a point of laughing and saying, this is ridiculous. It's called a repeater process. And the more times you repeat it, the more it burns out. Now, if that doesn't work, I got one more that will work for you. I. Okay. This was taught to me by one of my mentors. If you really believe there's something you should have done, you could have done, and you really insist on feeling guilty, because that's what it's all about. If you feel insistent on being guilty about something, I want you to put yourself. Get the thought in mind. Say it out loud. I feel guilty because I didn't call my mother and I want you to put yourself in a push up position on the floor and hold yourself in the up position as long as you want to hold on to that guilty feeling. And you just keep saying when your sweat's pouring off your head and your arms are quivering, say, I could have called my mom. I could have called my mom. I could have called my mom. As long as you want to hold on to it until finally you give up and collapse. Maybe then you'll be ready to get rid of the guilt. I'll tell you, it sounds crazy. It works. Be awesome.
