A short monologue (YouTube video transcript) by Blair Singer giving practical interpersonal strategies for handling emotionally charged interactions. Key advice: observe yourself when emotions arise, breathe and stay quiet, investigate triggers later, resist the need to be right (ego), and avoid 'flipping the switch' that leads to explosive reactions and lasting damage to relationships.
So how do you deal with a toxic client? Or how do you maintain a great relationship with your clients, your family, for anybody for that matter? Number six, when it's emotional. When you get emotional. That's what I'm saying. When you get emotional, stay quiet. Stay quiet and observe yourself. Now, this is really important. Tough to do, but. But listen closely. When you feel emotion coming up, get very quiet and observe yourself. Notice yourself getting angry, upset, frustrated, or whatever's going on. And get inquisitive about that too. Observe yourself. Every spiritual leader has always said that if you can step outside of yourself and be aware of you, you're not angry. I'm not angry. I am experiencing anger. And so you ask yourself, why am I? Where's that anger coming from? Because here's the thing. Here's the thing about it is that if you're really triggered and angered, it has nothing to do with them. Listen to me closely. It has nothing to do with them. Something about them triggered, something inside of you. So the issue is in you. Another person wouldn't get triggered at all because they don't have whatever sensitivity in their subconscious mind. Their little voice just didn't get stimulated. So that's good news. Why is that good news? Because now you. Later, if it persists, you can ask yourself, wow, why do I always get upset when that happens? Good. Now you can do some research. Now you can get some coaching. Now you can do some little voice mastery techniques that will ultimately bleed that out of your system. Okay? So again, observe yourself getting emotional. If you could do that. The emotion begins to subside already as you observe yourself doing it and question it a little bit. Observe yourself. Breathe. Okay, I forgot what number I'm on. Here's the big one. This is the biggest one of all. If you get nothing else out of this video, here it is. Fight the need to be right. I'm going to say it again. Fight the need to be right. Your desire to be right in an argument or an upset becomes the problem. It's no longer about the issue. It's about your need to be right. That is your ego operating. That's not you. That's the dark side of you, okay? You are a wonderful spiritual being that knows the right from wrong, that holds love and holds a space of cooperation, collaboration and agreement and all those things. That's who you are. But the minute you need to be right, it's no longer the issue. The need to be right comes from the fear of not being good enough. The fear of being taken advantage of. The Fear of not being, like I said, not being good enough, old enough, smart enough, young enough, rich enough, whatever, enough. So that's what drives the ego. The ego needs to win. The ego needs to win and needs to see someone else lose. That's all that is. So fight. Consciously fight the need to be right. When you feel, I got to set this right, I got to set. Stop. Just take a breath and notice that that's what you're doing later. Work on why you need to be right. Who cares if you're right or wrong? The thing you want to do is preserve a. Get a working relationship and move on to something more positive, I would assume. Okay? So you know, right now, in our world, you know, these are very, very powerful techniques to practice the need to be right. And you may be right, but your need to be right. Your need to be right and your fight to be right will stimulate the other person's need to be right and fight to be right. Now you can have two idiots talking to each other because neither of you are in a rational state of mind. Okay? No great decision was ever made in a moment of anger. Okay? No, ultimately good decision. Okay, so work on that. Don't. Here's another one. Don't flip the switch. You know the switch. I'm talking about the switch right here in the middle of your chest. It's like a light switch. And you know, you listen, you listen, you're getting more upset, more upset with your kids, with your spouse, with a co worker, with somebody else. And you feel like, I've had enough. And you just know that if you flip that switch, you're going to fly off the handle. Don't flip the switch. Picture a light switch sitting in the middle of your chest. And when that comes up, picture right now it's on, off. And just do. I'm not going to flip that switch. Don't flip the switch. You flip the switch. Damage done. Now you got another problem. Now you take days, weeks, months, maybe years, maybe never to repair some. Something that you can say in 10 seconds, then another minute later you'll wish you hadn't said it. We've all done it. I've done it. I'll probably do it again. But don't flip the switch.
