S31:E15🎙️ LIVE AWLL From Proverbs — Chapter 15

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Good morning, everyone. This is Coach Bizzy, and thank you for watching this special edition of the Leadership and Success Podcast. Today we're going to be talking about the Book of Proverbs, chapter 15. January 15th today, so we are going through the Book of Proverbs, one chapter every day for the entire month of January. And this is not a religious broadcast, but it's about ancient wisdom and being mentored from the book of Proverbs. So focusing on ancient wisdom and leadership lesson from Proverbs, how a book written more than 2,000 years ago can still be applicable in our lives today in 2026. All right, so first we're going to start— actually, before I do a quick review, let's do our moment of gratitude. As you know, it's our custom to take just a moment every time we meet to be grateful for something every single day. So today, I think I'm really grateful to be a U.S. citizen, to live in America, the home of the brave, the land of the free. America is not a perfect country, but I think it's the best country I've ever lived in. I was born and grew up in Africa, I've lived in Europe, and I moved to America when I was about 17 years old, and there's just no country like it. And it's part of the reason why I, John, the US military, the US Navy, back then as a seaman recruit and today as an information warfare commander. I think America is definitely a country worth fighting for, and I am grateful for America today. So let us know what you are grateful for today. Type it in the comment. Also, let me know where you are joining us from, what city, what state, if in the US, and if from another nation, which country. And also, if you have a question for me, type it in the comment. Or if you have any insight on the book of Proverbs chapter 15, which we started today, type it in the comment as well. And once I give you my 7 lessons for Proverbs chapter 15, I look forward to hearing your feedback as well. All right, thank you for that. So let's get started with a quick review of Proverbs chapter 1 through chapter 14.

Hi, this is Pastor Ron Carpenter. How can I help? All right, listen closely. Proverbs chapter 1 is all about the beginning of wisdom, and that start is the fear of the Lord. It's about getting wisdom, getting instruction, spirit of wisdom and revelation, so you can see life clearly and make choices that don't mess you up. The whole thing points to the fact that wisdom isn't just a heart posture, a way of living that sets you apart. That's the big idea right there. Chapter 2 picks up from that foundation in Chapter 1 and digs into why wisdom is like your best friend, your protector. It shows how wisdom saves you from the fools and the— you see, it's about hearing God's voice early, before trouble hits, so you can live long, peaceful days. The fear of the Lord keeps you safe and gives you— avoid all kinds of foolishness. That's the big deal there. All right, Chapter 3 is like wisdom's personal invitation. It tells us to trust the Lord with all our heart and not own ending. Come on, that's powerful. When you do that, he'll make your path straight, guiding you through life with success and peace. It's about leaning in, not just— in God's favor daily. That's a dang good life lesson right there. All right, chapter 4 is like the pep talk from your wise, loving dad telling you to grab hold of wisdom and never forget about guarding your heart, because everything you do flows from it, and you got to stay clear of folly that leads to destruction. It's a strong call to be God's friend and companion and your priority, period. That's the heart of it. Alright, Chapter 5 is a warning about the dangers of temptation, especially the seductive traps that can wreck your life and your future. It's got rules about staying faithful and wise, not falling for foolish shortcuts or lies that seem sweet but are actually bitter. The message is, keep your eyes locked on what's righteous and don't let yourself get fooled. That's the big point right there. All right, Proverbs chapter 6 is packed with tough love. It warns about foolish promises, laziness, and how God hates those who— among brothers. But the star of the show is that little ant, man. That ant shows us what diligence and foresight look like— working steady and preparing ahead. That's the kind of wisdom God wants us to get— practical, real, and hard-earned. All right, chapter 7 is like this desperate shout from wisdom warning you about getting caught up in temptation, especially that sneaky kind that looks good but wrecksh— Wisdom screaming for you to wake up, guard your heart, and choose the right way before it's too late. That's the big idea right there. Third is wisdom personified like a woman calling out in the streets, inviting folks to live life the right way. It's about how wisdom was with God before creation, showing wisdom is divine order and foundation for everything. The big idea: listen to wisdom's call and you'll walk in safety and honor. Chapter 9's like a knockin' on the door, y'all. It's callin' us to come on in, choose life, and leave the life of fools behind. Wisdom promises us blessings and safety if we listen. It's an invitation, plain and simple. Alright now, Chapter 10 is like a packed toolbox of wisdom. Short, punchy sayin's like, "Wise choices make life better, and foolish ones mess it up." It covers everything from how your words can heal or hurt, to hard work versus lazy, and integrity. Bottom line, every choice matters, and your life reflects what you plant with your decisions. Chapter 11 is all about the contrast between righteousness and wickedness showing up in blessings and consequences. It's like a mirror. You can see how being honest and— while deceit and pride lead to trouble. That's the heart of it. All right, Chapter 12 gets into how your choices about speech, work, and integrity shape your life. It shows that a rich person's words bring life, but fools just shoot off their mouths and cause trouble. It's a reminder that wisdom shows up in everyday actions and habits, not just fancy theory. All right, Chapter 13 is about how wisdom and discipline bring life and blessings, while foolishness brings destruction. It reminds us that what we say and do shapes our future, so choosing the math big time. It's like planting a garden. You reap what you sow, no doubt. All right, after chapter 14 in Proverbs, you keep seeing that pattern. Life and blessings, but foolishness brings trouble. The chapters that follow keep hammering home practical guidance on how your choices, your words, and your heart posture set you up for pain. It's like every chapter layers on that reality until it sticks. That's the big picture as you move past 14.

Alright, that's a pretty good review of Proverbs 1-14. So we did Proverbs 14 yesterday, and again, you can go to your favorite podcast platform and you will find episodes 1-14. It's all available everywhere podcasts are available, and you can review those. But quick summary for what we did yesterday, chapter 14, we had 7 lessons. Lesson 1 was Build before you lead. That was off of verse 1. Leadership always builds or destroys, and culture, trust, teams, and family are shaped by intentional action or careless neglect. So that's the leadership lesson number 1. Lesson number 2: Integrity sets the direction. Verse 2: Integrity is not a personality trait, it's a daily directional Choice. And our third lesson yesterday was Words Reveal Wisdom. So that was based on verse 3. Leaders are revealed by how they speak under pressure. And lesson 4, Discernment Beats Assumption, based on verse 8. Discernment requires reflection and foolishness rushes ahead blind. And lesson 5 yesterday, we talked about Emotional Intelligence is Leadership Strength. Verse 29. So emotional regulation is a core leadership skill, not a soft one. And lesson 6, we talked about success without wisdom is hollow, based on verse 12. Not every successful-looking path leads to sustainable outcome. And finally, we mentioned on lesson 7, we finish with influence multiplies consequences, based on verse 34. Leadership Influence Scales: Both Good and Bad Outcomes. So today we're gonna start with chapter 15. So this chapter, the big idea really reveals that leadership is exercised first through words, posture, and inner discipline before it is ever expressed through authority or action. "This chapter kind of contrasts gentle wisdom with harsh folly, showing that leadership culture resolves conflict and builds trust primarily through how they speak, how they listen, and how they receive correction." So to be a good leader, not only you speak, but it's not just what you say, but how you say it. But more importantly than speaking, I think, is listening. You have to be able to listen to your people, even listen to your enemies. You have to pay attention, listen more than you speak, in my opinion. And then you have to be open for correction, open for feedback, always, no matter who is the person giving you the feedback. Even people who hate you or don't like you, they may give you a lot of dirt, but in that dirt, there might just be some gold. So you have to dig for the gold. Always be open to receive correction because that's really what makes you better, right? It makes you a more effective leader. Because if what they say is absolutely not true, then you can just disregard it. But if what they say is actually true and you know that it is true, then you know that you need to change. You need to be better than you were yesterday. I believe I talked to— it was Commander Erica Dobbs yesterday on season 5. I believe it was episode 15. Commander Erica Dobbs, US Navy Navy retired, she said she doesn't compete with anybody. She competes with the person in the mirror, the man, the woman in the mirror. She competes with who she was yesterday. So I think when you are a young leader, that's really what you want to do. You always want to improve. There is always room for improvement. You want to be better than you are now, better than you were yesterday. That's the person you are competing against. Okay, and, uh, chapter 15, I discuss teaches that sustainable leadership flows from humility, emotional intelligence, and reverence for God, not from volume, ego, or positional power. All right, so the theme here is wise leaders govern their influence through humility, restraint, and teachable heart. You have to be coachable. And again, I want to remind you to watch season 5, episode 3, the conversation I had with Terry Maxwell. She's really a conscious capitalist. She helped a lot of business grow and scale, and she does everything based on her core values. And she won't hire anybody who doesn't align with the core values of her company, and she won't be doing business with organization again that don't align with her core value. She's a person of principle, and that's really the secret of her success. And I think that's so important, and people have to be open-hearted and teachable and open for feedback. So lesson number 1: Tone determines the trajectory. Your tone will determine your trajectory. So let's listen to verses 1 and 2.

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly, but the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness.

The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly.

Wow.

Leadership conversation escalate or de-escalate based on tone more than content. It's not just what you are saying, but it is how you are saying it. Are you speaking from a position of love and care? Or are you speaking from a position of judgment and criticism? Your tone has a lot to do with it. Wisdom is not only what you say, but how you say it. That's why as a leader, you really need to have a few people that you give permission to speak to you when you do something wrong. They can just speak to you frankly and tell you, hey, I believe that you are making a mistake and this is why. And you can trust their word because you know that they love you. And they stand by you. You know where they are coming from. And that's important to be open to criticism and also to speak gently, speak with love and care. All right. So how do we apply this? Intense meetings, feedback session, or crisis moment, regulate your tone first. Calm leadership, preserve authority, and psychological safety. So calm under pressure. So when conflict arises, do I lead with calm clarity or emotional reaction? How often does your tone amplify rather than resolve tension? So the anchor reflection here is a leader's tone can either pour water on a fire or gasoline, and you definitely want to de-escalate, pour water, not gasoline. All right, leadership lesson number 2: Wise leaders listen before they lead. Listen before they lead. So verses 7 and 14, let's listen to that.

The lips of the wise disperse knowledge, but the heart of the fool does not do so. The heart of him who has understanding seeks knowledge, but the mouth of fools feeds on foolishness.

The heart of him who has understanding seeks knowledge. So foolish leaders will broadcast opinion, whereas wise leaders seek understanding. Listening is a leadership skill, not a passive act. So listen actively. I think it was Stephen R. Covey who said, right? Most people, when they are in a conversation, they want to express themselves, but he says, no, first you need to understand before you speak, not to be understood, right? Understand the other person. And then you can respond to what they are saying, not just automatically react to it. So listen, think, and respond with wisdom and from a position of understanding. All right, how do we apply this? Create space for dissent, space for question, space for feedback. You are not always right and you don't know everything. So you need to have an open mind and allow people to challenge your assumption because that's going to help the team. So do you listen to understand or to reply? Yeah, again, Stephen Covey, his most famous book talks about that, Seven Habits of Successful People. I have that somewhere, but yeah, it is very, very important to listen, to understand, and not just to reply. Okay. And who on your team feels unheard? I think it's important for every member of the team to have the opportunity to speak because you, again, you never really know where wisdom is going to come from because wisdom doesn't respect rank. And anybody on your team could have a solution for the problem you have. So before you make a critical decision, I think it's wise to ask for the feedback from your team. But ultimately, you being the boss, you being the leader, you are going to make the decision, but, you know, be open to listen. So the anchor reflection, leadership credibility grows when people feel genuinely heard. When people feel heard and they have provided input and their input is being considered, you don't have to do everything they say, but if you listen to it and you consider that, that should be enough, they're gonna feel like, you know, they have a buy-in to whatever it is that the organization is going to be doing because they provided their input. All right, leadership lesson number 3: correction is a gift, not a threat. We're gonna read verses 10, 12, and then 31, 32. Let me back there. So let's go to 10 first.

Harsh discipline is for him who forsakes the way, and he who hates correction will die. A scoffer does not love one who corrects him, nor will he go to the wise.

And then let's go to 31 and 32.

The ear that hears the rebukes of life will abide among the wise. He who disdains instruction despises his own soul, but he who heeds rebuke gets understanding.

So if you heed rebuke, you will get understanding. Correction is a gift, not a threat. So teachability separates enduring leaders from temporary ones. Pride rejects correction, whereas wisdom welcomes it. So how do we apply this? Model humility by publicly accepting feedback and adjusting course if needed. So how do you react when you are corrected, and do you invite feedback or avoid it? Again, once you get feedback doesn't mean that you have to do what people are telling you, but at least you have to consider it because everybody has a blind spot, right? That's why you need to have a diverse team, different background, different ways of thinking. This way, if you have a blind spot and some things that could be really critical, terrible for whatever project you are embarking on, somebody can tell you, hey, have you considered this? And that's gonna again, help you be a better, more effective leader and achieve greater level of success or just avoid big trouble. So the anchor reflection here is growth begins where defensiveness ends. As a leader, you don't want to be defensive. You want to have an open mind and receive correction when needed. An open mind, not a closed mind. You can watch the podcast I did yesterday with Lisa Fan. She's a mentorship architect, and she talked about leaders and mentors having an open mind or a closed mind, and you really want to have an open mind as a leader. That is how you lead effectively, and that is what's going to allow you to lead in the long term. Okay, lesson number 4: culture is built through words. We're gonna read verse 4 and verse 23. Culture is built through words. Verse 4, here we go.

A wholesome tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.

Okay, and then we're gonna go to verse 23.

A man has joy by the answer of his mouth, and a word spoken in due season, how good it is.

Yeah, joy by the answer of his or her mouth. The soothing tongue is a tree of life. So what's the insight here? Words shape morale, motivation, and meaning. So leaders speak life or slowly drain it. So how do you apply this? So affirm effort, recognize progress, and communicate hope, especially under pressure. And I think it is so important as a leader to also reward your people, For example, when I was the commanding officer for the Young Global Network Operations Security Center in Suffolk, one thing I started doing every month, we would choose a sailor. I would call it Sailor in the Spotlight. So I would just recognize the sailor who did the most for the mission or who had the most impact on what we were working on and doing as a command. And then the following month, that sailor would then select and I will sell in the spotlight the one person in the unit who had the greatest impact on that person. And then it would go on and on and on and on every month I would do that. So I would give them my comments coin. I would give them a cap of the unit and I would write a thank you letter, a letter of appreciation. And then I would give them a book as well. So I would make a very, very big deal of it. So my sellers were really looking forward to it. Who is going to be the seller in the spotlight this month? Who had the greatest impact? On their fellow sailors. And that really helped the morale a lot because I feel like they are part of a team and the work that they are doing is being recognized by their senior leadership. So it's very, very important as a leader that you build that culture through words, right? And words of life and affirmation and appreciation. Everybody wants to be appreciated. And sometimes people, they don't really want to have more money or even more responsibility. They just want to thank you. They just want to be acknowledged that, yes, I'm doing I'm working very hard and I am doing the best I can in contributing to the mission and I want my bosses to know that and to just acknowledge that. Even if you just give them a thank you card or something and publicly praise them, recognize them, I think that really lifts the morale and encourages loyalty. They feel like they are part of a team. So things you may want to think about, do your words energize or exhaust your team? And what atmosphere follows you into a room? Which culture are you building? So the anchor reflection here is healthy cultures grow where leaders speak with intention and care. Really, the more I read Proverbs, the more I realize as a leader, you really have to lead with humility and with love. You have to care about the people you lead. And you have to be humble enough that you know that you don't have all of the answers and that members of your team have part of the answers and you need to listen to them. Again, if you go back to the conversation I had with Commander Dobbs, Erica Dobbs yesterday, US Navy retired, I believe it was episode number 15, season 5. She said that one time she went through a failure she really didn't have to go through. Because she wasn't listening to her team member. And the reason why she has a team is not just to have a team, is so that the team could help, you know, provide the input to help her as the CEO resolve some of these problems and strategize about where a company would go forward. So you have to listen, listen to your team as a leader. That's a must. All right. Lesson number 5: Pride distorts judgment, but humility sharpens judgment. We're going to read verses 25 and 33.

The thoughts of the wicked are— the Lord will destroy the house of the proud, but he will establish the boundary of the widow.

The Lord will destroy the house of the proud. Let's go to 33.

The preparations of the heart belong to— the fear of the Lord is the instruction of wisdom, and before honor Before honor is humility.

Humility comes before honor. So pride will blind leaders to risk, but humility keeps them grounded and alert. So practice servant leadership, credit others on mistakes, and remain approachable. And again, this is definitely the way I have seen all of the flag officers throughout the military, whether it's in the Navy Admiral or the Army Generals, all of them from one-star to four-star, everyone I've met, everyone I've served under has always, always been humble. And it's really amazing because when I was an enlisted seaman recruit, right, 21 years ago, the lowest rank in the military, I used to think that all of the flag officers were almost like demigods or something. I mean, wow, what a great privilege and honor, huge accomplishment. To be a one-star in the most powerful military in the world. But the more I work for them and those that I got to know, they are all so very, very, very humble. So much so that I started to believe that maybe they, they are sent to some type of humility school or something once they are selected to advance to the flag rank. Because I've seen some senior officers like me, commander, lieutenant colonel, or captain, and Colonel, some of them who are not so humble, right? They're pretty puffed up and proud. And most people I have worked for, most skippers, are very, very good. But there are very few that, that are not so nice or kind. But I have never, never in my experience seen a braggadocious flag officer. So again, maybe it lets me know part of the reason why they got so high in rank is because of their humility. They really truly love their sailors, the troops. They are soldiers and it shows. And that's the type of leaders I want to be. Again, I'm not competing with everybody, but I'm competing with myself, the person in the mirror, the person I was yesterday. All right. Humility comes before honor. So where might pride be limiting your effectiveness and how do you demonstrate humility in authority? Bianca reflection is true honor follows leaders who remain humble under pressure. All right, leadership lesson number 6: decision quality reflects counsel quality. We're going to go back to verse 22. Verse 22. So your decision is reflected by the counsel you receive.

Without counsel, plans go awry, but in the multitude of counselors, they are established.

In the multitude of counselors, plans are established. That's why I believe before you make a critical decision, you need to listen to at least 2 to 3 counselors, mentors, advisors, right? Get a different opinion and make sure again, you are looking after your blind side. Is there some things that you fail to consider? Have you made the wrong assumption? Have people that you trust who love you, challenge you and speak to you frankly. And decision quality reflects counsel quality. Have a personal board of directors, people you can go to and who can speak into your life. They don't have to tell you what you want to hear, but tell you what you need to hear, whether you like it or not. And you have to listen. Again, you don't always have to do everything they say, but you do have to consider it and then make your decision. So wise leaders don't lead alone. Collective wisdom reduces blind spots and strengthens execution. And again, for me personally, I like to listen to 2 or 3 of my dear mentors, people I love who have permission to speak into my life, and I will listen to everything they say before I make my final decision. Because the truth is, it's your life and you are going to live your own life and make your own decision, but do it wisely. So listen for wisdom. Okay, so you want to reduce blind spot and strengthen your execution, so you have to get collective wisdom, get good counseling. Get mentorship. All right, how do you apply this? You need to build diverse advisory circle and encourage cross-functional input. Who challenges your thinking constructively? Again, especially coming from people who love you, you need to give them permission to speak frankly to you. Where are you making decision in isolation? So once I did my leadership journey, I know there is the saying, it's very lonely at the top, but it doesn't have to be lonely. Yes, it can be, but it doesn't have to be. I think as a leader, as you are climbing up the corporate ladder, it's a good thing for you to bring people with you, not go there alone, bring a team with you, right? People you can trust and people who can speak to you frankly. It doesn't have to be lonely. You have to reach out to your mentors, reach out to your circle of advisor. No need for you to lead in isolation. All right. So anchor reflection, strong leaders surround themselves with truth tellers, not echo chambers. If you are foolish, you are going to have a bunch of yes men and yes women around you, people who just want to please you and are going to back whatever you say, even when it's completely ridiculous. What you want are people who actually think and who can speak to you and say, okay, sir, I do respect you, but I think we might be making a mistake because of X, Y, and Z. I think you need to consider this. And then again, you are the boss, you are gonna make the decision, but you do need to listen. So you really want that. All right, the final lesson today, lesson number 7, is, uh, reverence anchors leadership integrity. Reverence anchors leadership integrity. We're gonna go back to verses 16 and 17. All right, let's go there. Reverence anchors integrity. Here we go.

Better is a little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure with trouble. Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a fatted calf with hatred.

Better is herb with love than calf with hatred. Now let's read, uh, 33.

The fear of the Lord is the instruction of wisdom, and before honor is humility.

So reverence anchors leadership integrity. Wow, what a lesson. So values, not outcome, will define lasting leadership integrity, outlive success metrics. So how do you apply this? Align your decision with moral clarity, not short-term gain. Think about long-term perspective. Again, another lesson Brian Tracy, one of my dearest mentor, taught me. You have to think long term and the longer the term, the greater success you will have. The action I am taking today, what is going to be its effect on me? Not just today and tomorrow, but next week, next month, next quarter, next year, 5 years from now, 10 years from now, what is going to be the effect? And then you do it every day. So it compounds. Again, another great lesson I got from Darren Hardy, The Compound Effect. Very, very powerful. Very small steps. Daily, consistently will have huge, huge impact on your future. So think about that. So what values govern your leadership choices today? And are you sacrificing peace for performance? So the anchor reflection is leadership grounded in reverence produces peace, clarity, and endurance. So this chapter 15 reminds us that leadership is not loud, It is wise, measured, and deeply relational. Building relationship. Just because you have a voice doesn't mean that you have to scream, that you have to be the loudest voice in the room. Actually, sometimes leadership is very quiet and every word that you speak is weighted. It means something and people stop and listen. Colin Powell, right over there, right? One of my mentors, he wasn't a loud man. He, He didn't speak frantically or anything, but he was very poised. And when he spoke, he almost kind of changed in a way, almost like the molecular composition of the room when he showed up. He has so much presence. So I guess you call it charisma or executive presence, but whatever it is, people would stop in their tracks and listen to the man. He deserved respect and every word that he said was weighted and people would listen to every word. And consider it. That's what kind of leader I want to be. That's what kind of leader you should aspire to be. Not a foolish leader, not a loud leader, but someone who speaks with wisdom. So powerful. So wise, measured, and deeply relational. So leaders, they rise not by force, but by humility, not by dominance, but by discernment. When leaders govern their words, they receive correction and walk in reverence, they cultivate trust that endures long after authority fades. Another quote by one of my mentors, General Biggs, he told us, that was season 4, I believe episode 133, he says that rank is rented, but trust is earned. Whatever position you have right now, eventually you will not be in that position. People die, people retire, people get better opportunities, they move on. People get fired. But whatever position you have today, it will not be your job for the rest of your life. Rank is rented, it's only for a season, but trust is earned. And hopefully your legacy will be long after you are gone. People will remember you because of the impact you had in their life. People don't remember the words you say, but the way you made them feel. And that's by using your words and how you use them. All right, this is it for today. Tomorrow we're going to study Proverbs chapter 16. I hope you are here with us. And we are again looking for ancient wisdom and leadership lessons from the book of Proverbs, which is very much applicable today in 2026. All right, in a couple of hours I will be speaking— great, great honor and privilege to speak with General Larry Sponsor. What a great privilege that is going to be. Please join us live and prepare your question for the General. He's a people-first servant leader, trailblazer, principal steward, bestselling author of Dark Horse. We're gonna be talking about Dark Horse: From Airman to Four-Star General. And right after that, back to back, I will be speaking with Jamie Shambon. She's an Harvard-educated career catalyst. We're gonna be talking about career agility in an uncertain world. I think this is a timely topic for today. And tomorrow I will have a great pleasure of speaking with Colonel Josh Hartzell. He is a medical doctor, US Army retired. Combat physician, educator, speaker, bestselling author of A Prescription for Caring in Healthcare Leadership. We're gonna be talking about prescription for caring. So leadership in action. And I have another one I just confirmed for Sunday. I will let you know later today, but this is what we have planned for you this week. And thank you so much for watching this special edition of the Leadership and Success Podcast. Bye for now and see you in a couple hours.

Thank you for tuning in to the Leadership and Success Podcast with your host, Coach BZ. If today's episode added value to your leadership journey, be sure to subscribe, share, and join us again for more wisdom nuggets on how to lead better and achieve greater success. Remember, leadership is the most critical skill of our time. The world will always We need leaders to inspire others, drive innovation, and execute meaningful strategy. So why not count yourself among the bold leaders shaping the 21st century? Until next time, stay inspired, stay committed, and keep leading with excellence.