Season 2, Episode 05: Mentorship: Leadership Success with Coach BZ

Welcome to the Leadership and Success Podcast. With your host, Coach Beezy. If you need to develop into a better leader, this podcast is for you. If you want to achieve a greater level of success, this podcast is for you. His mentor, Dr. John C. Maxwell, said it best: everything rises and falls on leadership. We hope to inspire you today and provide you with an insight that has the potential to positively impact the trajectory of your life. Welcome to the Leadership and Success Podcast.

Hello everyone, this is Coach Bizzy again, Bob Fabien Zinga from Silicon Valley, and today I'm gonna be talking to you briefly about mentorship. Mentorship, leadership success. Okay, so I believe that mentorship is the master, master key of success. Why do I say that? Well, I think there are only two ways to learn anything, right? You either try something and you fail and you learn from your failure, trial and error, or you get a mentor. And a mentor is someone who's achieved what you are trying to achieve. So that's really the two ways to gain wisdom: trial and error or mentorship. And I prefer mentorship much, much better because it saves you so much time. You are able to really use the knowledge, the experience, and the advice of somebody who's gone before you and who's coming back to tell you where are the pitfalls, what you need to avoid, and what you need to do right. That's also part of the reason why I kind of love to read biography books, and I love to read the Bible as well, because you have stories of people, some of them great, some of them not so great, kind of teaches you what to do, what not to do, what's good, what is, what is, what is bad, what you kind of should focus on, what has worked for somebody else, right? And, uh, that's why I think it is, it is, it is key, right? And I also believe you have to be very careful how you choose your mentors, right? I am part of the John Maxwell team. I'm part of the mentorship program. Excellent, excellent mentors. They really teach you about everything from business, leadership, success, growth, and pretty much anything you can think of, how to be a better successful human being, right? And I think that is so critical. So you have to be very selective who you choose to mentor you. Just as an example, if you are having marital issues, trouble at home with your spouse, your wife, your husband, significant others, you really don't want to go get mentorship advice from somebody, for example, who got married and divorced 5 or 6 times, right? They probably don't know something about marriage, That's why they keep getting married and divorced over and over again. So you probably want to go to someone who's lived it, who's been with a single man or one man for like 15, 20, 25 years, and get from them, what is your secret? What have you done? What can I learn from you? Anyway, I think that is critical. So the definition of a mentor: someone who has been where you are trying to go. A mentor has already experienced the pain of the problem you are about to create. Isn't that fascinating? A mentor could make a significant difference in your life right now. A mentor could be the difference between demotion or promotion, loss or gain, success or failure, deterioration or restoration. A mentor can fast-track your path to success by providing you the privilege to learn from their experience, but also access to their network and resources, right? And many times mentors will do it for you for completely free. It's really crazy. They are willing to help people. They've achieved great success and they have this sense they really want to give back, right? And it is very, very important to them. And so I think as your goal, if you want to achieve great success, you need to make up your mind right now I need to find myself a mentor. If you want to get into a field you've never been, like, I don't know, probably in sales or science, and you want to get into cybersecurity, for example, find yourself somebody who has been successful in this field, and they're going to be able to help you out. Now, I like this quote by Mike Murdock. He's one of my mentors. Let me see if I can show it on the screen. I'm gonna read this one word for word, because I think it is extremely important. Mike Murdock said, "Your best friend loves you the way you are, but your mentor loves you too much to leave you the way you are. Your best friend is comfortable with your past, but your mentor is comfortable with your future. Your best friend ignores your weakness, but your mentor removes your weakness." Your best friend is your cheerleader, well, your mentor is your coach. So that's what mentorship is all about. They really accelerate your success in life, in whatever you choose to do, right? And I believe an uncommon mentor is worthy of pursuit. So you are the mentee, you are the protégé, you need to spend the time, the energy, the money, the resources in order for you to find the mentor and get the mentor interested in you, right? And I think if you find an uncommon mentor, they are definitely worthy of everything you do or say that is going to allow you to learn from them, right? I remember when I first started on this path, I was 17 years old, didn't have much money, didn't know many people. I have about 38,000 people who follow me on LinkedIn now, but that wasn't the case, right, in 1996. But one thing I could do, maybe I didn't have thousands of dollars or hundreds hundreds of thousands of dollars or millions, but I had $20 and I could spend $20 to purchase a book, right? This is my library. I've read probably, you know, more than 2,000 books by now since I was 17 years old. There is a book that my mentor has written. I see so many books here. One of my primary mentors, Dr. Maxwell, he's written more than 75 books on leadership, almost all of them New York Times number one best-selling books. Well, I can purchase this book for like $20, $25 and get the wisdom of his entire lifetime. Somebody could write a book and put into that book everything they have learned, and you can buy the book and read it in a couple of hours, a couple of days, a couple of weeks, and get their wisdom by just reading what they have written. That is a great way to get mentored. You may not know the person, but you can learn from them by reading everything they have written. Today, it's not just writing, it's podcasts, right? Listening to a podcast, you can learn a lot. Going into seminars, training. I am really an avid learner, right? I feel like learning is the one skill that is going to set the difference, right, between those who have an ordinary life and those who have an extraordinary life. Being dedicated to continual learning and improvement is going to make the difference. It's going to set you apart from everybody else because we don't know everything and there is so much to learn. But you need to be able to learn the right thing at the right time. You need to get the knowledge you're going to need in order to solve the problem you have now, right? And that's why, very, very important to me personally, every single year I spend a lot of money to go to training, to go to seminars. It is kind of crazy, but it's because I know what that mentorship does to me, how it improves my life, how it improves my marriage, how it improves my parenting, how it improves my work, how it improves me as a human being. But you need to invest in mentorship. You have to pursue the mentor. Again, you may not even have a personal relationship with the man or the woman, but you can really, really learn from them., right, by just reading their books, their works, or listening to them. So that is something you're gonna have to do as a mentee, right? You pursue your mentor. And one thing I've always done is really respect the time of my mentors. I think time is money. My wife will tell you, the first time we met at the University of Alabama, I had a website back then And she came to my website and she signed up to chat with me. And I was like, okay, what do you want to talk about, Robert? Because my time is money, right? She always reminds me of that. But it is true. Time is more precious than money to me because if you lose money, you can always make more money, always. But if you lose time, there is no way for you to go back. I can't get back yesterday or last year or the year before. It's gone in history, gone forever. So you have to respect the time of your mentor, right? Do not abuse their time. It is really a privilege to be in the presence of an uncommon mentor. You can learn so much from them and gain from their wisdom, but you do have to respect their time. You have to pursue them, and when you come to have a session with your mentor, come ready, right? Ask questions, because your mentor cannot ask questions that you have not asked, right? He or she cannot answer those. So you really have to do your homework, and so you can really maximize the time you spend with your mentor. And you don't have to meet with your mentor every day or every week either, right? Sometimes once a month or a couple of times a year. With the majority of the major mentors I have in my life now, we only meet about twice a year for like 15 to 30 minutes. That's really all I need. I just need some type of blueprint, right? I want an outline. Okay, this is where I am now, this is where I'm trying to go. What do I need to do to go from point A to point B? Based on your experience and everything you know, what is it that I should be doing different if I knew differently? And I can get that in 15, 20, 30 30 minutes. But I believe you really, really do have to protect and value and care for that relationship with your mentor. And another thing about mentorship too is your mentor doesn't actually have to be alive right now, right? I talked about books and cassette tapes and video training, podcasts, and so forth. So even when someone is dead, many times they can still speak into your life through their works, right? Like, Jim Rohn is another mentor of mine. I've been listening to him since I was 17 years old. He died a while back, but I still read his book and listen to his training program. So, though he be dead yet he speaks, right? And that's really the power of mentorship. Now, another aspect of mentorship I would like to talk about just a little bit is There is a big difference between a mentee, a protégé, and a parasite, right? Protégé starts with P, parasite starts with P, but it's not the same thing. A parasite is almost like those blood-sucking parasites. They want everything you've got, but that's not what the protégé does. The protégé doesn't want what the mentor has earned, but what the mentor has learned, right? I want the knowledge of my mentor, I want the wisdom of my mentor. I don't want their car, I don't want their house, I don't want whatever they have. That's theirs to enjoy. I want to learn how they got it so I can do the same thing and get my own, right? Very, very, very big difference between the parasite and the protégé. And sometimes you really have to be careful about that because sometimes people, they come around you as you become more and more successful, but don't just want to learn from you, but they want to pretty much steal what you've got, what you have earned, right? And they want to use you in order to fulfill their own personal project, or they, they have their, their own agenda. So as a mentor, you have to be careful about that too, right? So I really think mentorship is key. And if you are part of the John Maxwell team, you definitely have to be a part of the mentorship program because it is worth the money. Yes, for you to To get mentors, sometimes you are going to have to spend money, you are going to have to spend your time. And I already said earlier, to me, time is much more important than money ever will be. You have to put in some energy, you have to put in some effort, and you have to seek after the mentorship that is going to make a big, big difference in your life, right? And that is just very, very important. And once you get that mentor, you really need to value that relationship and you need to add something to your mentor. At the beginning, you may not have very, very much to add. Like one of the mentors I have, we meet once every quarter for about an hour from time to time. She asked me, okay, I have this problem, Bob, what is your opinion? How do you think we can solve this issue? Or what is another way to think about this? And that is really very, very, very satisfying, right? For me, the protégé, to hear my mentor say, hey, I care about how you how you think and, and what you think. Maybe there is a better way to solve this, this problem I am tackling right now. And I think one attitude you need to have is, how can I add value to you? But it's not just a one-way street, right? It is two directions, bi-directional. The mentor helps you, but you need to find a way to add value and to help the mentor also in some way, right? Now, again, it may not be money, because probably you probably don't have much money now, that's why you need mentorship so badly. But there are other ways where you can really add value, right? You have to focus on the value and just ask, you know, what would be valuable to you? What can I do to add value to you? So for you to achieve great success, I believe You need to get the best counsel possible, and that might be through books, again, tips, uh, could be through training, it could be through several ways, or one-on-one mentorship session, or group mentorship session, being a part of a mastermind. But you need to find the counsel you need, whether it's running your business, whether it's getting certification in IT or security, getting into the cyber security field. Or building a family, growing wealth, whatever it is that you need in life, somebody has the answer. And you need to find that mentor, and you need to get the best counsel possible. So I've talked about that, but you also have to associate yourself with like-minded people, right? That's why I really love mastermind groups, because those people are just like you. They're trying to get somewhere, and you kind of help one another achieve your goal. That is really the best place to be, right? Where I can help you, but you can help me too, and we are both thinking on the same wavelength, we are at the same level. Because many times what happens is, once you make up a decision, you want to live a better life, you want to achieve a greater level of success, the people you've grown up with, the people who've been with you since you were a child, your friends and people you know, who may not have your mindset, are gonna do everything they can to dissuade you from going after your dreams and going after your purpose. Like, who do you think you are, right? Those, those type of things. So at times, in order for you to be successful, not only you have to seek a mentor, but you sometimes also have to break off relationships with people who no longer serve you, who are not going to help you get to where you are trying to be. It's not easy, but sometimes that is really the only decision you need to make. And again, if you are part of the John Maxwell team, you absolutely have to join the mentorship program, no question about it. Mentorship accelerates success, right? So, um, your mentor ceiling could be your floor. That's something that Papa John talks a lot about. And really, if you are a great mentor, you want whoever you are mentoring, your mentees, your protégé, to do so much more than you ever did, right? So Your ceiling as a mentor should really become the floor for your mentees so that they can kind of stand on your shoulder and carry on from where you started. Earlier, the previous podcast, I talked about how leaders should really develop other leaders, right? It doesn't make sense for you to be a leader and just have like a bunch of followers. Well, yeah, well, that is nice, people are following you, great, but what have you done for them? Can you develop them into leaders as well, right? And that's how you kind of multiply your impact. And when we talk about legacy, your legacy has legs, and those mentees become legs to your legacy. And you're like, yes, I'm very satisfied, I have done my job, I've achieved my dream, but now I have helped other people achieve their dreams as well, right? So your mentor ceiling could be your floor, and that is really wonderful when it happens. And Most of you already know, I have mentioned this a couple of times on social media, but no, I started in the Navy back in 2004. I was a seaman recruit, that's E-1, that's the lowest, lowest rank in the military. There is nothing lower than that. So you get to do all of the dirty jobs, right? Anything nobody wants to do, you are going to be the one to do it. After boot camp in 2005, I was promoted to seaman, which is an E-3. And at boot camp, I made up my mind, I will become a chief, which is an E-7, so senior enlisted personnel, or a commander, which is an O-5, a senior officer. Those are the only two options for me. I will be a chief or an officer before— a senior officer before this is all said and done, right? So my dream was realized last year in 2021, April 2021. I was promoted to the senior officer rank of commander in the U.S. Navy. And just this month, February 2022, I was elected to be the commanding officer of an information warfare unit. I'm really living my dream right now. It's above and beyond everything I could have asked or imagined. It's beyond my wildest dream. But I think one of the key secrets to that, to my success, is mentorship. As a seaman, I was always seeking advice. I had a lot of chiefs that mentored me when I was enlisted. And then when I became an officer, I became an ensign O-1 in 2007. Chiefs were still mentoring me as an O-2, as an O-3, as an O-4, as a lieutenant commander. My chiefs were still mentoring me, showing me the way. Just because I am an officer and I outrank you doesn't mean anything. Those chiefs have been in the Navy for a long time. They know exactly how everything works. If you listen to them and you do what they say, you are going to succeed. So now that I am a senior officer, I'm like, okay, these chiefs have mentored me from E-1 to O-5. I'm not going to abandon them now, right? So I'm still being mentored by chief. If God willing, one day I make it to O-6, I become a captain in the US Navy, I will still be mentored by chief petty officers of the US Navy, right? Because mentoring is so important, and I think you need to have more than one mentor too. And sometimes a mentor could be a peer as well. If you have someone who's at the same level as you but doing better, in one area and you're kind of struggling, they can be your mentor in that area and teach you how to do it or how to do it better, right? So the key to my success was mentorship. That is really all there is to it. And if you are starting brand new in a field and you've never done that job or starting a business or whatever it is you set your mind to do, I highly, highly recommend that you find yourself a mentor. Someone who's going to give you advice, someone who's already accomplished what you are trying to accomplish. And many, many times those people will do it for absolutely free, and sometimes they are also open for you to invite them to lunch, dinner, or whatever. I have done that in, in the past, and for that hour that you have a meal, you just listen and take notes, right? You are learning from their experience because indeed mentorship is the master key of success. Until next time, this is Coach BZ.

Thank you for listening to the Leadership and Success Podcast with your host, Coach BZ. If you like what you heard, please subscribe to our channels and come back for more wisdom nuggets on how you may develop into a better leader and achieve greater levels of success. Leadership is the most critical skill. The world will always need leaders to lead others, deploy the next disruptive technology or execute a business strategy. You may as well decide on counting yourself among the 21st century leaders. See you right here next time on the Leadership and Success Podcast with Coach BZ.