Season 2, Episode 12: Live with Carl H. Sharperson, Jr on Leadership and Success

Hi, I'm John Maxwell. When the top companies in the world are looking for trainers, speakers, and coaches, there's one name that stands above the rest, and that's Maxwell Leadership. Our certified team members have gotten proven results for companies all over the globe, and our reputation I'm proud to say is second to none. Some of our members have risen to the top of their profession, including the one you're going to meet today. I proudly introduce you to my friend, Bob Fabien Zinga.

Welcome to the Leadership and Success Podcast with your host, Coach BZ. If you need to develop into a better leader, this podcast is for you. If you want to achieve a greater level of success, this podcast is for you. His mentor, Dr. John C. Maxwell, said it best: everything rises and falls on leadership. We hope to inspire you today and provide you with an insight that has the potential to positively impact the trajectory of your life. Welcome to the Leadership and Success Podcast.

Hi, I'm John Maxwell.

When the top companies in the world are looking for trainers, uh, Hello everyone, and thank you so much for watching the Leadership and Success Podcast. Looks like we have a dozen of you guys watching live right now, and if you would please type in the comments where you are watching from, what city, what state, and also if you have any question for my guest Carl Shapperson Jr., please type those in the comment. So to get started, I'm gonna bring on Carl. How are you doing, sir? Good morning to you.

I'm doing very well.

Fantastic.

Doing well.

If we can just get started, kind of let us know about your leadership journey, how you came to become the leader you are today.

Okay. I always start at the very beginning. I am the grandson of a Virginia tobacco sharecropper. I think it's important to understand where we came from, understand your history to understand where you're going. Anyway, grew up in a household, parents were loving. I learned encouragement from my mother. She was kind of a listening ear in the neighborhood. Everybody came to her for advice. And then my father had great work ethic. He never missed a challenge. He was well-read, and he was just a great leader. And actually, he was actually in the Marine Corps in World War II, one of the Montford Point Marines. So I was actually born in Washington, D.C., grew up in an environment where everybody looked like me. And I played sports. I played football, baseball, always had a ball in my hand. And at the age of 14, my dad decided to move us to Spotsylvania, Virginia, which is about 60 miles south of Washington, D.C. I was in the 8th grade, halfway through the 8th grade, and he wanted to move us out of the city and move us into the country because he thought it would be better opportunity in that environment. During that time period was the same time period as the movie Remember the Titans. So I integrated a school in the 8th grade. So I go from an environment where everybody looks like me to an environment where nobody looks like me. Not only do they not look like me, they don't want me there. So very challenging, very trying. And I learned a lot of lessons there. My high school coach was the 3rd most influential person in my life, Coach Sparks. He's the one that sent the recruiter. To my high school to recruit me to play football at the Naval Academy, and I didn't know what the Naval Academy was. It was only 90 miles up the road, primarily because there weren't a whole lot of people that looked like me going to the Naval Academy. So I entered the school, wanted to play football, never played tackle football before. I was fast, I could catch. Coach Sparks gives us a talk that I'll never forget. He said, you got your pads today, Uh, if you don't want to play, turn them in. No harm, no foul. But if you come back the next day, I need you to stay until the end of the season, because quitters never win and winners never quit. He said, if you quit my football team, you might quit school. You quit school and get married, quit your spouse. Have kids, you might quit your kids. Because once you quit the first time, it's easier to quit the next time. So I developed a mindset that I was not going to quit. So I played my 9th grade year, didn't have fun, did not quit. Fast forward, my senior year in high school, I'm the most valuable player of the football team. That never would have happened if I had quit, right? So that was a powerful lesson for me. Coach Sparks told me when I was sweeping up the locker room in the 10th grade, he said, what do you want to do after high school? I said, I'm not sure, Coach. He said, if you apply yourself, I'll help you get a scholarship. He told me that in the 10th grade. I never thought about getting a potential scholarship or going to college. So my 11th grade year, I played on the baseball team. We win the championship. Coach Sparks is also my baseball coach, and, uh, he leaves. I don't know why he leaves. He leaves. I didn't find out until my 30-year high school reunion why he left. He left because the assistant coach, who was Black, wanted to— was applying for some positions, and the superintendent said no. And Coach Sparks stood up and said, that's not right. So the superintendent said, you can teach but you can't coach. So with that, Coach Sparks left Spotsylvania, Virginia, and started coaching at St. Joe in Annapolis, Maryland. That was the connection to sending the coach to my high school. Um, so The recruiter comes in, myself and two other guys, my senior year after the football season. We get called to the office. We don't know why we're getting called to the office. In walks this guy, 6'2", blue suit, white shirt, blue tie, white coverall. He says, "I'm from the Naval Academy and I want to recruit you to play football." The other two guys walked out. So I graduated from high school in 1971. Vietnam was still going on. They said, "We're not going to Vietnam." I was the only one to listen. And I listened because my dad always told me, never turn down an opportunity that you haven't been offered. Always listen. So I listened, came home and talked it over with him. He said, it's a pretty good education, you might want to pursue it. Nobody else was offering me money. So I said, I'm going for it. I applied, could not get in straight in because my— I was not academically prepared to go to the Naval Academy. So they offered to send me to a preparatory school in Harlingen, Texas, the southern tip of Texas. First time I'd ever been on a plane, and I learned how to study for the first time. I didn't realize to study you have to open a book, and if you don't understand it, you read it again. You don't understand it, you read it again. So anyway, so I go to the prep school, apply the next year, I get into the Naval Academy, go to the Naval Academy. Played football and, um, had several leadership positions at the Naval Academy. Graduated from the Naval Academy, decided to go into the Marine Corps, decided to become a pilot in the Marine Corps. Again, when I was in the Marine Corps and going through flight school, the attrition rate for pilots was 66%.

Wow.

Only 1 out of 3 graduated. So the first day they tell you that So I looked to the left, I looked to the right. I said, y'all not going to be here, but I'm going to be here because Coach Spartz said, "Quitters never win, winners never quit." So I used that mindset throughout the Naval Academy as well as flight school, got my wings, did 5 and a half years in the Marine Corps, got out as a captain, did two 6-month Mediterranean cruises on and off ships, did a 3-month Caribbean cruise, decided to leave the Marine Corps, entered, started working for Procter Gamble in Albany, Georgia.. And the key thing about Albany, Georgia was Procter Gamble at the time in 1971, when they started up the plant, said they wanted to hire the same multicultural mix as the community. And at that point in time, 40% of the community was African American. So when I got there in '81, 40% of the technicians were African American, 20% of the managers were African American, and 20% of the managers were women. Unheard of in Southwest Georgia in 1981, one of the few places Dr. King couldn't crack. So what attracted me to that environment was I got an opportunity to learn from people that look like me, and people that didn't look like me. So I learned about organizational development, team building, strategic planning, how do you set a vision, how do you get results in a high-performing work system, was in that facility for 5 and a half years, started up 3 products, moved to Cincinnati, Ohio, And then after 7.5 years with Procter Gamble, I decided to work for Frito-Lay in Indianapolis, Indiana, at a, at a food plant. I'm making chips, Santitas, Tostitos. I worked in that facility for years. Procter Gamble was an organization where they promoted and hired from within only. Frito was one of those where they stole people from P&G and other places, got them what they needed, and said, go make it happen. But it was a very tough environment, backbiting. So I go from a very nurturing culture to this type of culture. And I said, this is not it. So I ended up going to work for Colgate-Palmolive in Topeka, Kansas. The guy that was the vice president of manufacturing that worked in Procter Gamble as a plant manager and Frito-Lay, so he wanted to blend the two cultures. So I go there and I became the plant manager. Of a union facility, the first time I'd ever worked in a union facility. Right. But what I found was the same processes and leadership that worked in Procter Gamble and Frito-Lay work in a union plant. You know, we took that facility that was a traditional union facility and turned it into a high-performing work system. We had the best results in all of the plants in that system. So I'm constantly moving west. My parents are living in Virginia. My wife's family's from Florida. I want to get back to the Southeast somewhere. So I decided to work for a company called Dunlap Slauson as the Vice President of Manufacturing. And that brought me to the area. After about 6 months, 7 months, it became clear that my boss and I agreed to disagree. So after about a year, we parted ways. So I'm in the right location, but I don't have a job. So then I say, okay, what am I going to do? I said, what can I do? What can I sell? I said, I can do speaking, I can do executive coaching, I can do strategic planning. So I hung out the shingle and used my network to start my business in 2000. And that's pretty much what I did. I worked for Harley-Davidson, GlaxoSmithKline, University of North Carolina, a lot of big companies, a lot of small companies. And while I was at Koge Palm Olive, I had an opportunity to do some training at the Center for Creative Leadership, which is one of the top non-academic leadership institutes in the world. And I got certified in a program called the Looking Glass Experience. So that's where I got the skills, coaching and development and things like that. And through the 7 years that I worked with them, I probably, I probably coached and worked with 15 times 21 people, high performers. I learned a lot about how to coach people and stuff like that. So that's kind of what I did after starting my own business. And then about 15 years ago, I started doing professional recruiting.

Hey, Carl, sorry, it looks like I lost you for a second. Okay, I can hear you just fine now. So you were saying you got into recruiting as well?

Yes, I did professional recruiting for 15 years. And so I do that also. And 11 years ago, I was diagnosed with stage 4 non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. And in 1983, I had a brain tumor removed. So I've had some adversity, but it's all made me stronger.

Wow. This is, this is really fascinating to, to hear your story from the very beginning. I think it was Coach Sparkwart who told you quitters don't win and winners don't quit. Actually, my godfather used to tell me the same exact things. So I don't know who originally came up with that, but yeah, it can be quite inspiring because I think no matter who you are and what you are doing, at some point you are gonna feel like stopping and doing something else, just giving up, right? So I feel like you really have to develop a sense of passion and purpose so that you can continue to do what you are doing even in the face of adversity, right? Because it seems to me like people who are super successful, they keep doing what they need to do whether they feel like it or not, even when they meet obstacles. Whereas the majority of people, as soon as they meet an obstacle, they just decide to stop and they stop too soon. And sometimes they may be so close to having a breakthrough or really being successful, but then they just stop short of their breakthrough moment, right? I think that there is a very popular story I used to hear about some people who went to Africa. I think they purchased like a diamond field, and I guess it had gold too, but they kept digging and digging and digging. I think they were only like one foot away, right, from the gold, but they gave up. Somebody else came and purchased the field for almost nothing because they They tried for almost a year, couldn't find anything, and then that person became like a millionaire overnight. So in life, you really have to have— I don't know, I feel like success is maybe 80% mindset and only 20% strategy and execution. The way you are thinking and the way you feel, your attitude, I think, has a whole lot to do, uh, with it. So as I see, you've been able to apply that when you went to the Naval Academy, but also later on in life. Anything you'd like to add about this attitude of winning, like never ever, ever giving up and always trying to find a way to achieve your goals?

Yeah, I agree with you, Bob. I'm a firm believer that adversity will put you in some situations and cause you to do some creative thinking that you wouldn't normally do in good times. So, you know, the way life is, life is like a roller coaster. You either up or down, you know, but you got to keep it moving. And it's going to be like this. So when you're down like this in the valley, a lot of times that's where you get the breakthroughs and brainstorming, and you get help that you wouldn't normally ask for and things like that. So I'm a firm believer that adversity can also create opportunity that you wouldn't normally get.

Wow, that is fantastic. Well, and then unfortunately, two more things I would like to highlight when you were diagnosed with cancer. How did you find the strength to kind of go through the treatment and survive?

Yeah, it was, um, I, um, I had some signs of, um, my body not responding, night sweats and things like that, and I was working out, um, and my belly was getting big. And I finally— actually, I went to get a routine colonoscopy. I went to get my first routine colonoscopy. And shortly after that, my symptoms increased, my everything increased. So anyway, I go to the doctor, they run a bunch of tests, and they diagnosed me with stage 4 non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. Wow. So when I was diagnosed, I was— I had a big belly, skinny face, skinny legs, arms. I looked like one of the starving kids from Africa. It really had taken a toll. And I can remember the nurse who was the caregiver, case manager. She told me after we were diagnosed and my wife was in the hospital room with me, she was crying. And the nurse says, Carl, you can beat this, but you have to have a positive attitude. So you got to have a gratitude. So, um, you know, one of the things I've always done, and I learned this at the Naval Academy, when they put you under stress in boot camp or Naval Academy, whatever, for me, I always, um, I had to be focused all the time. In other words, um, things didn't come easy to me. In other words, studying that quickly and also got stuff, I always had to assess the situation Develop a plan, execute the plan, and keep it moving. So I addressed cancer kind of the same way. Who are the experts? What are the doctors telling me to do? Let me get together a plan, then I'm gonna work the plan the best I can, keep my head down, and hopefully things get better. And there's a serenity prayer that I believe— it's called Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. So that was kind of my mantra. And I had 6 rounds of chemo 3 weeks apart. And, you know, 6 months later, I was cancer-free. But throughout that journey, I, you know, I got sick, and I was broke. I was broke, broke, you know, and I had to humble myself and actually contacted the president of the Naval Academy of my class. He contacted a company mate of mine named Keith. Keith put together a GoFundMe program before GoFundMe was in existence. My classmates and friends supported me financially for an entire year.

Wow.

So that was— so I get down so low. So what do you got to do? You got to ask for help and believe.

Wow. That is just very inspirational. And also the relationships that you built as you are going through life and going towards your own dreams. But I really like the attitude you have because sometimes things happen to you completely unexpected, out of left field, I guess is how you would say it, but you still have to remain positive and find a way out of there. Yeah, I also remember there was even a time in my life too where even my family, we pretty much had to to get on full-time because at the time there just wasn't any other way. But what was important back then to me was, okay, we may do this now maybe for a couple of months or 6 months, but this is not forever. This is just where I am right now. There is somewhere I am going and eventually I am going to get there. And you know what? I think to be successful, you do have to be humble as well and know exactly where you are. And it's perfectly okay to accept help when you absolutely need it, right? Because many of us, we like to give, give, give, but don't want to receive. And I think it is very, very important to be grateful, to be humble, and to receive as well. That's a very powerful lesson there. And I think members in my audience would definitely do very well to learn and just reach out when you need help. Because if you are arrogant or you just feel you are too proud, then you are gonna have— you're gonna be suffering more than you actually need to, right? Because part of the reason why we have so, so many programs even in the US government is to help people. Now, what I am kind of against are people who pretty much take advantage of the system and they have figured out a way to absolutely do no work, not add any value to society. Very few people do that, but But when you do need help, yes, you absolutely need to ask for it. This is really— Yes, please.

I have another story that kind of dovetails into that. So when I was living in Indianapolis, Indiana, working for Frito-Lay, my wife was pregnant with our second child, right? And she developed this disease called hyperemesis. Hyperemesis is a disease where you can't keep food down. So she was difficult to keep food down. So she was fed intravenously for 6 months. And I'm traveling 40 miles up the road to Frito-Lay, right? So one day my wife gets a knock on the door and it's a neighbor. The neighbor knocks on the door and says, uh, I understand you have some health problems and we want to help. I want to help you. My wife says, no, we're good. The next day, the neighbor comes back with a friend, another neighbor. So it's 3 of them. They knock on the door again. They see my wife, said, Jackie, we understand you have some health issues. We want to help. My wife says, no, we're good. And this is what they said: Don't block our blessing. Wow. Don't block our blessing. You know, so like you said, there's a lot of people that want to give, But if you don't accept, really, you're not helping that person. You know, you got to be able to receive also. And not that you do stuff to get stuff, but you know, if you help people when you're down, people will help you.

Yes, yes. Wow, that is, that is quite a powerful, powerful lesson. Yeah, now you made me remember of another critical time in my life because I came to this country from the Congo. The first year of school, my mother was able to pay for my entire school year. It was like $16,000 at the time. It's back in 1996. That was about 2 million francs in the country I came from. That was a lot of money. But anyway, the second year I was in school, a civil war broke out in my home country and she couldn't send any money at all. So that was the time where I really I understood the power of relationship of friends, just humanity, people. I didn't even know who were willing to help me because I had no money for food, no money for school, no money for anything. And I really saw, I believe, the kindness of God through human beings. And most of those people, I don't even know what their names are and I will never ever be able to repay them. I definitely was not in a position to pay them back. It's one thing for you to help some of your friends, you know, buy them dinner today and you know they're going to take care of you next time, but when you help somebody who absolutely cannot pay you back and cannot give you back anything but you still help them, that is very, very, very powerful. And I think the greatest lesson I've learned out of that experience was for me to pay it forward. I won't be able to pay back the people who helped me, but I can help somebody else in the future who's going to need my help and who may not be able to be in a position to ever pay me back too. And I think that's kind of what we should be doing as human beings. Wow, that is a powerful lesson on leadership. Anything else you would like to add, Carl?

Yeah, the other thing about that also is if you look, if you go to any 12-step program, we're talking AA or any addiction, the 12-step program, the last step is to help somebody else.

Wow.

That's the last step. Once you're fully recovered, then you help somebody else. And that's the last step in that process.

Yes, it's true. What goes around comes around, and people do reap what they sow. And that's another reason why even when people join new organizations, sometimes people like to prioritize or treat the executives or senior management extremely well, but then they kind of mistreat the entry-level folks. The genitals and things like that, but I really believe you have to treat everybody exactly the same, show them dignity and respect because you just never know, right? Somebody who may be working for you today, tomorrow might become your boss or whatever. So if you treat everybody right, you really sow that good seed around you, eventually I think it will come back to you, multiply. Now one other thing you mentioned that's kind of scary, you actually left a great paying job when you didn't have anything lined up, right before you became an entrepreneur and started your own business. Tell me about— because I think you have to have a lot of faith to do that. In my career, I've done it one time only. I don't think I will do that again. But just tell me about kind of what went through your mind and just the process, the faith you must have had to just jump and start something from nothing.

Yeah, I, um, well, I assessed the situation. I said, okay, so, and one of the things I've always done, even when I was working for other people, is I was getting some skills. And when I did the consulting, when I get— when I did the training at the Center for Creative Leadership, I saw people that were doing similar things to me, and I compared myself with what I did, what I knew, and I said, I'm as good as them. So why can't I? You know, so I had that backing behind me. And again, it was a leap of faith. And some people have an entrepreneurial mindset, some people don't, you know, when I was in the Marine Corps, part of the reason I got out of the Marine Corps was because in the Marine Corps, I figured there was a high probability for me to have at least one boss that gave me a bad fitness report, and would ruin my career. And I didn't like those odds. Yes, I said, let me get out. At least if I have that going on, I can get, you know, I can do something different, you know. So part of my, I guess I've always had kind of an entrepreneurial type mindset, wanting to do my own thing, and use, you know, and use others. But I can remember a guy talking to me when I was at Procter Gamble, he was a West Point grad. And he said, my philosophy is to get as high as I can in the organization as fast as I can, because I want less people telling me what to do.

That's a very good philosophy there. I like that a lot. But I think I must say, especially in America, more than any other country. It doesn't really matter where you start, right? You can start at the very bottom of the ladder, but eventually you can be at the very, very, very top, right? Everything is possible in this country with hard work, I think, and treating people right and being focused on developing your skills. You can pretty much do anything you want to do. One of the biggest examples in my life is when I did join the Navy. I was a seaman E-1. So that's the very bottom of the ladder. Everybody I met pretty much outranked me back then, but today I am a commander, right? O-5. So it's been quite a journey, but I really believe anything and everything is possible. But I guess you need to have faith in yourself, but also faith in your fellow human being and kind of working as a team to really do something great and in the process develop personally. And professionally as well. Okay, uh, we've already spent, uh, more than 30 minutes on the call. I could talk with you forever. I want to get to my 7 favorite questions. So, uh, number 1 is, uh, what is the greatest lesson you have learned? What do you think is the secret of your success?

Well, this lesson I learned when I, uh, integrated school, when I moved from Washington, D.C. to Virginia, right? What I learned was everybody wants the exact same thing. They want to be loved. They want to be respected. And they want to be successful. I don't care what color you are. I don't care what your nationality is. I don't care what your sexual orientation is. Yes, I don't care where you came from. Everybody wants the same thing. So going through life, I understand that. So when somebody says something to me that's disrespectful or whatever, It's not my problem. They got the issue, right? So again, if I believe that everybody wants the same thing, then I got to figure out what is it that that person's missing, kind of help them get it. If I can help them get it, I got a friend for life, a loyal friend for life that'll move heaven and earth for me, right? So once you understand that, it's a powerful tool. I mean, you know, you know, you got the power. And it's almost like, you know, martial arts. In martial arts, if somebody comes to you fast, You don't force with force. You use their power to leverage them. So in that situation with people, if people come to me saying things wrong or whatever, and I speak softly and show them love, that's kind of the same thing. You can't argue with somebody that's loving you. You can't do that.

Wow, that is quite powerful. It reminds me of something Oprah had said. Of course, she's interviewed Everybody, but even when she talked with great dignitaries or even to people that nobody absolutely knew, at the end of every single interview, people were just like, did I do okay? Did you hear me? Can you validate what I just said? You are correct. I think that's something that everybody in the world, regardless of their rank, position in life, they just want to know that, yes, I have heard you. Yes, I care about you and I will consider what you just said. That's another thing about leadership I really love. Yes.

Yeah, there's another lesson kind of in that too. And you talked about it a little bit, treating everybody equal. So I've been in situations where I've had to go in and turn around organizations, right? So the organization is backbiting, all kinds of drama going on. It's just a bad place to live, all right. So what happens a lot of times, I can't be everywhere at the same time., right? I have to depend on people to give me information. Sometimes the janitor is the one that has the most information. So if you can be friends with the janitor, the janitor will share, share with you information that nobody else gets, you know. And there's other people in the organization that are like that, you know. Um, and one of the things I've found is I go into organizations and I, you know, there's always a person or two that people say they're always complaining. And, you know, they don't do this, they don't do that. I go sit with those individuals. A lot of times, they are the smartest people in the organization. And they're pissed off because nobody listens to them.

Yes.

So I go in and listen to them. Help them out. I got a spy that's helping me out. You know, many, you know, somebody's helping helping me out, you know, but that's, you know, you can't be everywhere at once, but you got to develop trust with people so that they can help you out. And they're willing to do that.

Wow, that is a very, very powerful lesson. What would you say is the greatest leadership advice you have ever received?

Um, one is probably learn from the best of the best. If there's something I don't know, I identify somebody that's doing it. And then I either study them, talk to them or whatever. When I was at Procter Gamble, one of my goals was to meet with the best of the best. So I was at a mentoring event with the president of the company. I was second level manager at the time. The president had this mentoring program that he started. So I went to it. They had the presentation afterwards, people mingling around, nobody was hanging around the president. And I said, what can I do to meet with John Pepper, who's the president? I says, I got it. So I went up to him and I said, John, my name is Carl Sharperson. We've never spoken before, but we have something in common. He says, what is that? I said, you like to mentor young people? I like to mentor young people. He says, wow. I said, I'd love to sit down with you sometime and discuss that. He said, oh, I love that. I said, what do I need to do to make that happen, Mr. Peppers? Just call my administrative assistant, tell them that I want to talk to you. Two weeks later, I'm sitting in the president of Procter Gamble's office talking about leadership, getting his advice. You get not because you ask not.

Wow, that is, that is powerful. I really love it. And also, really, in life, if you don't know anything, you are correct. There's somebody that knows how to do what you are trying to do, and you can eventually learn. From them. And the great majority of successful people I've ever reached out to, they really want to help because they want to give back too, right? And they are very much approachable. But yeah, it's just having that courage to just ask. And sometimes too, I think you can be mentored even if you can't see them face to face, or maybe they may no longer be alive, but if they have written books or they have some type of training or things like that, you can definitely learn. From their work too. Wow. Okay, that is, that is, that is great. So question number 2, what are you learning now? I know leaders are learners.

Yeah, what I'm learning, I'm a continuous learner. So what I'm learning now is how do I take, and it's an ongoing process, how do I take what I've learned? Okay, so I've got, I've got the ability to speak, to speak to crowds and people and stuff like that, coach individuals, help them maximize their potential, help organizations organizations maximize their potential. My book is a life-changing book. I do believe it's a life-changing book. So what I'm doing is saying, okay, how can I take these tools, get them in the hands of the right people, transform organizations, transform people's lives, and maximize my potential, as well as help this, this world be better? Because I'm not gonna— I finally figured out that I'm not gonna be here forever. Okay. And I got a whole lot less years ahead of me than behind me. So what can I do to make a difference? So I'm continuously listening, listening, and learning. We got— I got two ears and one mouth for a reason. Word says, be quick to listen, slow to speak.

Yes.

So anger— I know what I know. But I don't know what everybody else knows. I gotta listen.

Yeah, that's something my mom used to say. So you should be speaking half as much as you listen, right? But, uh, well, this is great. So, um, question number 3, uh, how has failure shaped your life?

Yeah, um, again, that's, um, that's the, the, the, the, the, the things that didn't go well are some, some things that are pretty tough. I'll give an example. So most recently, most recently, but we're talking 2 years ago, My wife went in for back surgery, okay? So she, she'd been having back pain for like, she probably 20 years, right? So finally the doctor says there's a cyst between L4 and L5. So she has the operation, it's like a 6-month recovery, uh, surgery goes well, she's no longer in pain. 2 months into that 6-month recovery, she feels a lump on her breast. Mammogram, MRI, stage 3 breast cancer 2 years ago. Wow. 16 rounds of chemo, double mastectomy, reconstructive surgery in the last 2 years. Okay. Adversity, not for me personally, but my wife, you know. So, so through that, you know, we, you know, she, she currently has a, a good diagnosis and things like that, but there were some things that happened that, for example, If she had not had the back surgery, she probably would not have felt the lump. And 7 months before, she had a mammogram. Zero on the mammogram. So in 7 months, wow, she went to stage 3. So if you think about all the different things that occurred and how blessed we are, you know, uh, so that was adversity. Uh, we approached it the same way. Let's get an assessment. What do we need to do? We're going to do what we can do. No. So that's— and so stuff can happen in a heartbeat, car accident, heart attack, you know. So those abilities to afford adversity, it's just a matter of the way I look at it now is, okay, God, what are you trying to teach me?

Wow.

What do you want me to learn out of this?

That is— that is quite powerful. I am so glad your wife is doing so much better and has been able to overcome that too. Wow, that is, uh, that could be really life-changing, just know the resilience we have as human beings to keep going through adversity. Wow, thank you, thank you so much for sharing that. The question number 4 is, uh, who do you know that we should know? Who are your mentors or thought leaders, people that you are following now?

Okay, so a couple of people that I think you would know is one is my daughter. She's 31, but she's a speaker. She's a consultant, a coach. She also has a full-time job, but she's a very good speaker. And she has kind of an old soul. In other words, she's, you know, she has a lot of wisdom for her age, right? That would be somebody I would suggest to you. And then I have a cousin named Alisa Kastan Abdullah, and she is currently the Deputy Security Officer at Mastercard. So she's been in cyberspace for a time. She'd be a good person to know. If you don't know, I'd be surprised. You might know her or something like that. But as far as thought leaders go, and people that I follow, the couple that I told you about— I don't know if I told you about— but there's a couple that I met when I was in Cincinnati working for Procter Gamble, Floyd and Jackie Dickens. Jackie— I mean, Floyd was the third African American hired, uh, third African American engineer hired by Procter Gamble. And while he was, uh, working at Procter Gamble, his wife, uh, wrote a thesis on his, um, journey through that. And then they wrote a book called The Black Manager in Corporate America. So I got a chance to meet them, became friends with them, they kind of helped me. I got their, their philosophy about how to raise children. So they were like mentors. And then there's several people at Procter Gamble that mentored me throughout. And I, one of the things I do, like I said before, is identify people that I want to learn from. And I'll make them my mentor, you know, they, you know, I just, it's kind of the same thing. When you have a mentor, you want somebody to give you information. So you can be proactive and identify people that you want to learn from. And if you have your stuff together, you do what you're supposed to do, there's very few people that are not willing to help you. Wow. Miles Monroe is a pastor. He's one of the— he's deceased now, but he— I listen to his stuff and he— I mean, he's just got such wisdom around leadership. So I listen to him a lot. Miles Monroe.

Yeah, I, uh, I miss Dr. Miles Monroe. He was really, really good. Uh, And yeah, definitely. And one thing I really love about leadership, I think you kind of mentioned that earlier, right? Whether you learn it in the military, corporate America, or church, nonprofit, it doesn't matter what setting you are in, those principles work just exactly the same. It's pretty powerful. Wow, that is great. So, and I know leaders read quite a bit. What have you read that we should read? Or what are some of the best books you've, you've read recently?

Okay, one is, there's a book called Good to Great by Jim Collins. I don't know if you're familiar with it or not. Yeah. But it talks about organizations that are good, and then they become great. And he says that good is the enemy of great. There's a lot of organizations that are good. But when you go to that next level, It costs— you've got to be consistent. You got to be consistent in your communication. You got to be consistent in your leadership. You got to be consistent in everything that you do, continuously improving. Then at some point in time, you become great. Uh, and, uh, so that's a great book to read. Um, another good book is, um, Good to Great in God's Eyes. It's by a guy named Chip Ingram. It's kind of the same philosophy except it talks about, God and how to be good to great in God's eyes, how to think great thoughts, how to, uh, do good prayers, have good prayers. So it's kind of the same philosophy, but it's, it's more about life and how you become a, uh, a good person.

And that's, that's by Chip Ingram, right?

Yes, Chip Ingram.

Yeah, fantastic.

He's one of the best teachers, Bible teachers that I've ever, ever, uh, heard Wow, that is fantastic.

Thank you so much for sharing, and I'm going to be adding links to those in the comments for those who are interested in purchasing those. And so we are now at question number 6. So what have you done that we should do? What is one action you have taken that has positively impacted your life?

One of the things that I've done that's positive— is that the same question as what do I suggest that you do?

Was that a different question? Yes. So some things that you have done that we should do, or an action you've taken recently that has positively impacted your lives that our listeners should probably think about doing too.

Gotcha. We alluded to it a little bit when you get down If you, if you think you're down and you want to get up, the best thing you can do is go help somebody that's worse off.

Hmm.

Right.

So one of the things, the most recent things that I've done that's really, really impacted my life is I did a Bible study or I do Bible studies with homeless veterans.

Wow.

Now, so what? So, so now you have a population that at some point in time, they were at the top of their game. You know, they got through boot camp. You know, they did some great things in the military, and then all of a sudden, they're homeless. Okay. So when you listen to them, talk about their stories, and you share with them, what I have found is that it all goes back to childhood. Something happened in childhood. I'll give you an example. One guy I was talking to, he said, Uh, he was, um, his son was getting ready to turn 9 years old. He wasn't with his son, right, because he and his wife were separated. And he said, I'm thinking about— he'd been straight, he'd been sober for like 9 months, and that was the longest he'd ever been sober. And he said, what's keeping me sober is I want to be able to see my son again, and I want to be able to— I don't want him to end up like me. And he says, he says, when I was 11 years old, I took my first line of cocaine.

Oh my goodness.

He says, I took my first line of cocaine when I was 12 years old. There was a 22-year-old in the room, right? And he says, my son is 9. I do not want my son to have to go through anything like that. So being able— so that was one of the many stories, right? But when you listen to the stories, uh, it's either sexual abuse Alcoholism, parent, you know, it's really dire straits that normally causes individuals to, you know, to be in that situation. In every situation, when you listen to the story, somehow it goes back to childhood. So, you know, trying to help those individuals that might be in that situation or young people, you know, so that was one of the most powerful learnings that I have. Always able to listen, can always learn some things.

Wow, thank you, thank you so much for sharing. Another question in Visaya is, if you had one and only one day to live, what would you have liked your final contribution to be?

Wow, that's a deep one there. My final contribution Final contribution, um, probably have a legacy such that others can learn from my, my life and stand on my shoulders. So that's, that's it, I would say, is be able to leave something that that people can benefit from that I learned.

That is wonderful. Thank you. Thank you so much for your time, Carl. So the very last question is number 7. How can we add value back to you?

Yeah, that's a good question. What I would like for individuals to do is to, I mean, if they know someone that needs a good speaker, you know, I can find out what the audience wants and deliver that. I can do executive coaching, which means I can help individuals get better, go from mediocre to maximizing their potential. I help change cultures in organizations. And that's where leadership starts. It starts at the top, you know. So you got to change the mindset. And because of all the different experiences that I had— military, athletics, nonprofits, 3 Fortune 500 companies, entrepreneurship, you know, family. So I've been in all these different arenas. And there are very few people that I can't develop rapport with. There's a book called Speed of Trust by Covey. And one of the things he talks about in that book is he talks about if you're going to do a deal, then the most, the most important thing you can do is speed up the trust. Okay, speed up the trust. So how do you speed up the trust? You speed up the trust By— it's two things that were not— it's two things that will speed up the trust. It's two reasons that are the issue. In other words, if we're working together, we're beginning to work together, Bob, and we don't trust each other, it's one of two things that's the issue: either competency, lack of competency, or lack of character. So let's say that you want to get you need to have a heart transplant. Okay, so you're trying to find somebody to do the heart transplant, right? You come to me, you know, I'm a great person, great family man, do what I say I'm going to do, but I don't have any skills in heart transplant. You probably won't have me do it, right? Yes. So you go to another person. This other person is a renowned heart surgeon, has one of the top techniques in the world, right? And you know that, but he cheats on his wife he lies and he steals. Okay, you probably won't have him do your heart surgery because he's, he's not— no character, right? So those are the two things when you don't trust somebody. Those are two things you address. Now, if you speed up the trust, two things will happen. You will reduce the time and you will reduce the cost.

Hmm.

Warren Buffett in the book did a deal, billion-dollar deal on a handshake. Because he understood the people, he knew the people, right? What did that do? It sped it up. Didn't have to do all this due diligence and spend all this money, right? And it reduced the time. So speed to trust.

Wow, I love that. Thank you. Thank you so much for your time. You've been very generous. So for those watching live on LinkedIn right now, looks like it's a dozen of you. If you have any question for Mr. Karl Sharperson, type it in the comments. And if not, this is going to conclude our podcast today. And thank you so, so much for coming again. And I will encourage everybody to purchase the book Sharp Leadership. I really personally believe that leadership really is the most critical skill of the 21st century. Carlo, is there anything else you would like to add?

Yeah, one quick thing. So the book is, is, uh, one of the things it does is it opens up people's minds. Right? You become very transparent because of all the different things in there that people connect to. So I can take the book and do a 1-day workshop, 2-day workshop, diversity, equity, and inclusion leadership, you know, so it's, it's a powerful tool. I do believe it's a manual for overcoming adversity in any environment, in any stage of life. And I'm so glad to be on your podcast, my friend. You have a blessed day.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much. And until next time, this was the Leadership and Success Podcast. You should be able to watch the replay right away on LinkedIn. And it should be on all major podcast platforms within 2 or 3 hours from now. Thanks again.

Thank you for listening to the Leadership and Success Podcast with your host, Coach BZ. If you like what you heard, please Please subscribe to our channels and come back for more wisdom nuggets on how you may develop into a better leader and achieve greater levels of success. Leadership is the most critical skill. The world will always need leaders to lead others, deploy the next disruptive technology, or execute a business strategy. You may as well decide on counting yourself among the 21st century leaders. See you right here next time. Time on the Leadership and Success Podcast with Coach BZ.