How C-PTSD Shows up in the Workplace and What You Can do About it

Hey folks, welcome to my channel. I'm Brooke Richey, your fellow multi-trauma survivor, 20-plus-year, uh, vocalist, film composer, indie rock artist, and I'm here just kind of compiling all my experience, my studies together to help people make sense of some big problems in their lives and to get out of a spinning mindset, a reactive lifestyle, and do this confidently and do this actually through the human voice. Your voice is your body's regulator. It's your number one regulator, your communicator, your navigator. And so whatever you say becomes your reality in life. And that, that goes with thoughts that you think, that you ruminate on in your mind. And being a musician for years, and kind of getting into a relationship with music and trauma, kind of in a trauma bond. I've learned a lot about how to break out of this cycle. And so, you know, my step right now is to— we're leaving all the trauma behind, and then we have the music and we're introducing new life. So there's no more trauma bond, but this is what I'm trying to help people overcome. So today's video is on how CPTSD shows up in the workplace and what you can do about it. I have a history of working in corporate America. I really enjoyed for a few years driving these crazy commutes. Um, it started off as, as a bus commute, like an hour and a half in the mornings, but then eventually got a car spot, and then I got to see these beautiful sunrises. driving to my place of work. And after I parked, then I would walk through the streets of that downtown city, and then I would get to go to this beautiful high-rise, and we all got to watch the sunrise together. So I share that with you because the whole thing that comes with the stigma of trauma is that healing is isolating because the attacker usually gets community because the person that speaks up is being viewed as a disruptor to the peace, right? Because we're speaking our truth. Let's dive right in. Uh, the top ways that CPTSD shows up in the workplace and what you can do about it. Number 1 is dissociation. Dissociation comes with hyper-awareness. And so what's going on with dissociation, it also comes with anxiety. So this is what it looks like. If you don't know what dissociation is, dissociation is a disconnect of the mind from reality. So your coworker, your colleague, it could be a boss, it could be anyone that has a traumatic history that's not resolved, right? How this might be showing up is through dissociation. So this might look like constant multitasking, and they're on the Brink of inconsistent work output. They have a disorganized work style or desk. There's something that, that, that shifts for folks with CPTSD, and it's to be in constant disarray and disorganization. So if they can stay disorganized, it's a way of avoiding the trauma, because if we get organized, that means we have to look at the trauma. I'm gonna say that again. If we get organized, that means we have to look and accept the trauma— look at and accept the trauma. So dissociation then happens obviously because of a trigger. So what's going on for this person is there's something in the environment that's triggering them. And I would argue that most likely, if they are dissociating on the job, It's something that has been in their everyday life that they are used to, and it's almost like a second, um, you know, it's like the way that the sun comes up every morning. That's just how their body operates at this point. So here's what you can do. Um, oh, and a few other points of how this looks: consistent asking to restate questions or statements made in meetings. So, that's, that's a huge indicator that someone's dissociating. It, it could come with some tiredness and fatigue too, but people might just say they're tired, fatigued, because they don't want to have to say, oh, I'm dissociating because I have this traumatic history, right? Like, people don't, people don't want to have to do that first thing in the morning, 9 AM on a Monday, right? So, but here's the thing. This is a mitigatable issue. So, if you catch someone And I hate to use that word, but if you do see someone, if you witness this, if you see someone dissociating, meaning they're just really not, they're not connecting, they're not making eye contact, right? We connect through eye contact, and especially when we're communicating. And so if we don't use eye contact, what's going on is Someone's avoiding seeing, looking in the mirror, right? They're avoiding looking in the mirror. So see how I just did that and I made sure that I was looking straight at the camera? And I know I look this way and that when I'm talking and stuff and such, but that's because this is actually a trigger for me. I'm here doing this. If you've listened to my last videos, this is my number one trigger, is being on the screen. On the camera because my origin of trauma. So here's what you can do. You can break up and realign their focus. So let's say you and I are conversing and I continuously— you ask me a question and I look away as I'm responding to you. Like, I'm still facing you, my face doesn't even move. I know I moved there. But I'm looking away as I'm talking to you. That is someone dissociating. So what you can do then is say their name. Say, Brooke, can you repeat what you said? Can you clarify what you're talking about? And this is going to ignite something in their brain. It's going to— one, it might make them irked, but this is a good thing because it— that irk, that irkness, right? Getting them irked. Makes them show up a little bit more. They have to say, okay, well, this is how it actually is. You know, they have to re-clarify, they have to re-explain. No one likes to have to re-explain things. So when you ask them, wait a second, can you, can you say what you just said again? I'm not fully understanding. You're giving a platform for this person to show up more fully in the moment. So What else you can do is get specific on a detail of something and ask for their input. So going back to what I just said, you're asking them to explain their opinion and their vision and getting specific. So you, you really want to narrow in on something specific because that what's going on in their brain right now is I like to describe this as like the, the fly eye effect. So you're, you're You're like, your headspace, it's like you have multiple eyes on your head, and you're looking everywhere at once. That's what dissociation feels like. And so to center their focus, get really, really, really specific so that they can connect right here with their third eye, because that's what's missing when they're dissociating. Second, how else does CPTSD show up in the workplace? Panic attacks. So during my time in corporate, I had panic attacks probably every week. I don't know how often in a given week, but, you know, at one point I want to say it was about 2 to 3 times a week. Um, and what was going on, you know, what was going on was just that I was in this, this, this space that was triggering. And with CPTSD, this is the thing with triggers, they are subtle. Um, they're by association. So everyone in that workplace that I was around, most people, 99.9% of the folks there, they were all safe. They were all safe. Like, and the, the only ones that, that weren't safe were, um, you know, the ones later where I got this new manager and he wanted to demote me in my last 30 days of employment. And I was like, this doesn't make any sense. Like, you don't do that to your customers. Like, we— this is 50 accounts. We're not going to shift them and then shift them again. Like, that's not good change management. And so I fought back on it. And anyways, ultimately what happened was I got paid out, um, to leave the next day. So, um, Panic attacks. What this looks like, the employees might take frequent breaks, and more frequent than a typical workflow. So they are really struggling with staying focused. Um, they might just arrive to work or something. Here's an example. They may just arrive to work, 20 minutes in, we get to this lull, right? The whole office gets to this lull. Of, you know, there's an equilibrium of everyone's working and everyone's in a workflow. And this is what triggers these employees who have past trauma that's unresolved, who has CPTSD, because there's something in the peace and the calm that then causes them to turn on that part in their brain that says danger. There might be something dangerous here because somewhere in the past what was supposed to be peaceful wasn't. Okay, so that, that turns them into walking on eggshells, and that's what drives the panic. So they might get up right away, and they might do this often so that they can break up that feeling in their body of not escalating into a full-on panic attack. It could look like multiple long breaks throughout the day too, getting away from for significant periods of time so they can really, really digest all the emotions that are coming up for them on the job in the midst of the triggers. And let's see, this is— so this might raise concerns for you of, if you're— especially if you're the manager, you're the boss— of, are they committed? It seems like they don't care. They aren't taking work seriously. You know, like, these are things that are easy to jump to based on those behaviors. But before you jump to those conclusions, because nothing ever really good comes from jumping to conclusions, is to look at their performance and stats before you make those assumptions. And, you know, if you, if you act too soon and you make the assumptions before really looking at the bigger picture, you could hurt the work relationship and you could potentially just, you know, damage the team dynamic and whatnot. So what's actually going on then for this individual is something about the workplace is triggering them, and it's causing their amygdala to fire off that they have to go into fight, flight, or freeze, or fawn. Usually functional freeze is the most typical with folks that are in, you know, working a typical 9 to 5. Uh, they go into functional freeze And what this is doing actually to their body is so bad, being their body is just storing the emotions, suppressing them while they're continuing to go through the work. So I want you to think about this. You are essentially being asked to sing an opera, right? With a restraint around your midsection, around your chest. Like, like, let's just say you're in a straitjacket and a corset, okay? So you're being asked— then you're not asking them, but what they're doing to themselves that you can help break up is forcing themselves to suppress these emotions because they are so fixated that they have to perform. So there's something in the, in the talent and the performance dynamic That's causing them to panic. So think of if a panic attack happens, if there's signs— if you want to see, if you want to know what signs of a panic attack are, it could be crying, redness of the face, like puffy face, puffy eyes, perspiration. Do they have a tired calm about them, as in they just released, you know, they just went through the panic attack and they come back and they're kind of like You know, it's like coming back home from the gym, right? Like there was so much exertion that just happened, and now they're coming back to their desk and they have this tired calm about them. Those are signs of post-panic attack. So think of panic attacks like seizures. You, you can't necessarily stop them from happening. Sometimes they don't fully escalate. It's nice when they don't, but usually a panic attack needs to happen for them to lessen. It's one of those things where the more it happens, you know, the more it's freely accepted that it can happen, the individual is able to work through the trigger. And what you can do If someone— if you notice that someone had a panic attack and they come back to their desk and they sit right next to you, right, or they're walking through, it's 2 things. Get them back in the swing of things. So try and make eye contact and bring them right back into, hey, we're looking at this right now, or hey, like, ask a specific question. Going back to that last point, ask a specific question about work. Because really what this person wants— this person doesn't want to have to deal with these panic attacks. But they do know, as I'm saying, that they kind of have to happen in order for them to work through it. So when you draw them back in, invite them back in, and you know, there's, there's no questioning, there's no judgment about where they just were and that sort of thing. Just bring them back into work. This is what this person actually does want. They don't want to have to have the disruption in the first place. You can do this in a matter of 5 minutes. You're looking at something, and then on the offhand, gently just say, hey, are you okay? Is everything all right? If it feels right, right? You know, follow your intuition. Just let the panic attacks happen is the thing, and create a safe space for response. Okay, next point. Third point, how does CPTSD show up in the workplace and what to do? Overworking and overcompensation. These are huge, huge, huge, huge. There are so many things that plague trauma survivors about having to prove their worth, having low self-esteem, not having confidence despite all of their accomplishments. Okay, um, and they continue to live from this place of I'm not enough. And this can come up in the workplace as overworking. So if they're working long hours, um, they are taking on more tasks and projects for, you know, picking up the slack. Like, it's always nice to have that person. I, you know, we hear this all the time. We've seen it in all the shows of like, hey, can you pick this up? Hey, can you pick this up? Like, can you help me with this thing? And it always falls on the one person in the office. This is likely a people pleaser. This is a people pleaser. This is someone living from a place, most likely not all the time, of I'm not good enough, I'm not enough. And if this person is constantly having their job position boundaries pushed by you all Just because you know it's and it's it's easy. It's not a big thing. I'm not saying it's a a major thing being crossed. It's just the fact that this person likely doesn't have good boundaries. So you got to respect the boundaries of the position and acknowledge that this that really asking you have to acknowledge it in the ask is what I'm saying. You have to state it with this person. Hey, I know this isn't your responsibility. Can you help me with this if you have the time? That's what I mean. That's a perfect example of asking of this person but giving the space so that they can acknowledge, I don't have to say yes to everything and to everyone. I don't have to prove my worth through work. This is really a major problem, and I could really get into the history of this. There's There's demons that follow folks with this, and it causes a lot of issues, and it causes— it's, it's mind-crippling stuff. Any thought that is something that evil and darkness can use to keep you trapped, they will use it. Okay, so The thing, and why to, why to pay attention to this and why to, you know, monitor your asks of this person and that sort of deal. Why to do this? Because you want to keep them on your team. You don't want to have to go through another rehiring process. If this person continually says yes because they don't have their own boundaries developed— It's a real paradox that trauma survivors are in. Because we love the, the structure that may come with a team, with a 9 to 5, but we're trapped with a trigger. And it's not because we see PTSD— and it's not all CPTSD folks, it's, you know, I'm not saying everyone who has CPTSD works at a 9 to 5. You know, it, it happens to be by association, right? So something— bottom line is they could work anywhere, but there's something about everyday life, everyday life that's triggering them, which is why it shows up at work, because it's everyday life. I hope this makes sense. Wow, this is really great for your business from the outside. In the long term, you could end up getting in multiple occasions of people running into burnout because these folks people pleasing on the job, um, they are operating from that place of I'm not enough, I have to prove myself and my worth through my work output and my success and my achievements here. Okay. Now you can see how maybe you don't want people like that on your team. But if you do have people like that on your team, just acknowledge the fact that you want to have them around for the long term. And by pushing the asks, right, of can you do this, can you do this, can you do that on them, because you know they'll say yes. They might not even be aware of their own ability to exercise boundaries, and that's why they have the 9 to 5 in the first place, is because they know they need the help with the boundaries. Okay, so honor the position requirements, right? And this— and it goes both ways, for the employee and for you. I hope this is tracking. The last thing you want is resentment to be harbored and, and built up. And so with the overworking and the overcompensation, you kind of have to lay the example and the foundation for them to say no. Last, the last point, the last thing, last— narcissism shows up in the workplace as a form of CPTSD. This is largely seen with managers, with friends of managers on the job, you know, the close colleagues, coworkers that came onto the job because of that manager. Things like situations like that. And what does it look like? It looks like sabotage of threatening coworkers, colleagues, and employees. And these people aren't actually threatening, is the thing. There's nothing unsafe. There's nothing violent going on. There is nothing. What's threatening to the narcissist is the view of this person's ego, that they— the perceived ego that they see in this person. They see that this person is successful. They see that this person is dedicated in their work. They see that this person is committed, that they have a whole well-rounded personality and character, and they don't have that. That is what— that is what is threatening for the narcissist. And so this can look like sabotage. Sabotage of what's been built by this person or what the person's working on. It can look like belittling, um, dismissing behaviors towards employees especially. It can look like complaining about work that wasn't done to their expectations that weren't communicated. But it was met based off of the expectations that was on the project docket, right? So can you work for a narcissist? You can. How do you manage working for a narcissist? You get really clear with your boundaries. You don't even communicate your boundaries. You just exercise them. Okay. So the narcissist in a work environment, let's say it's a manager, might complain to you about the output from one of your coworkers or another manager or what have you. They might be complaining to you about that. Don't respond to this. If you're going to respond, say, "I hear what you're saying. Could you tell me how this is helping X, Y, or Z problem or work focus in the company? Could you tell me how this is bettering our work culture? What are what is your point?" Okay, like say an I hear you. Say I hear you because that's what the narcissist wants. Um, say I hear you, but then ask them, can you repeat what you're saying and tell me how this works towards this goal that we're all working at right now? The belittling and the sabotaging, how to deal with that? Again, don't react to it is the thing. And know when you have to cut a loss is the thing. Especially, yeah, just know when you have to cut a loss. If, if there's no hope, um, in things turning around for you, if you don't enjoy, you know, if there's— if you can't find any enjoyment in working with this person, for this person, don't stick around. There's no point. So there you have it, the top ways that complex post-traumatic stress disorder shows up in the workplace and what you can do to help mitigate the problem. And the problem isn't the employee. The problem is the past experience that's coming up for them in the daily life association to their past trauma. They just need help healing their trauma, and they're going to actually do that through everyday life more over than, you know, cutting ties with them. I really want to encourage you, if you're seeing behaviors that are making you question as a manager, does this person care, are they committed, and that sort of thing, before you cut ties, just look at their output of work and see if they're actually doing a good job. It just might not Come the way that you're expecting it to come is a deal. And to care for them is the thing. Trauma survivors need security, and that obviously is found in a job working on your team. You know, whomever it is that you might be thinking of as you're watching this video, they need security, and taking away security isn't going to help. Okay, so the more a trauma survivor gets used to disrupted security, the more the problem goes on. And if this happens with all these folks that are dealing with trauma, it just allows the trauma to keep happening in our world. And it's really the healing— the healing comes the most through everyday change. And that is where, if you're a CEO, you're a boss, you're the owner, you're the manager, where you can really make significant impact in healing our world and our workplace, our economy. Okay, so thanks for listening. Thanks for tuning in. I will catch you in my next video. Resources for you below. Peace and stay safe.