It Takes Two: How To Heal with Music

Did you know that on average it takes about 15 to 20 years for a trauma survivor to recover their voice? Well, I'm not going to jump into the science of the reason why. This is a known fact, and I can also speak to the testimony of this. When you suppress something and shut yourself down in an event of trauma because of the fear, the terror, the primal instinct to protect yourself, right? When you name what that trauma is it's then put into this vicinity of light of having to reaccept the reality of it. And that's also something that we instinctively try to avoid in order to protect ourselves. So I'm Brooke Richey. I'm a 20-plus-year vocalist and multi-trauma survivor. And the reason why I love to introduce with that is because these are 2 things that rely on the health and the use of the human voice obviously to succeed at singing and a successful music career, a vocalist career, as well as overcoming trauma. And because the instrument is something that you carry around with you, it's built into your body, I am very passionate about getting people to understand how to use the human voice for their benefit in the way and the work of its design. And that design being When you say something is going to be, it's going to be. So if you say, I'm going to go do this thing— here's how this works. When you say that you're going to do something, when you say that something is going to be as it is, you're speaking that into existence. And yes, there's the actions that we have to do as humans to make those sayings, those expressions reality. You can't do one without the other. But the whole point of it being is if you don't say that you're going to do it, there's no intention. If you don't say that you're going to do it, there's no primal level, subconscious level of accountability of, yes, I'm going to do that thing. So just a quick example of this: when I said when I was, I don't know, 13 years old, 14 years old, that I was going to be a singer, that I put that intention into my subconscious mind. I was 13. I knew that when I was 13, I was going to become a musician. I knew that I was going to be doing music for the rest of my life. And what that's done over the long haul, you can look at my portfolio of work and where I've come from and how I've grown, but that's led to film composition, that's led to musical writing and directing, and that's also led to recording professionally, both on trumpet and voice. And getting to do like show choir with instruments for Seattle Sounders pep band Soundwave a few years ago. It's led to a lot of things, and that's because why? I knew something that I wanted and I spoke it out with my voice. And even though there was trauma going on— and I know I'm kind of going on for a minute here before we're getting to the topic, the main topics of this video, but I need you to understand this— I said something when I was 13 and it mattered to me. to keep acting upon it. So I need you to connect with that, whatever that is for yourself, so that you can be the best person you can be, so that you can have the reality that you want, so that you can create the world with others who are doing the same thing and join with them in whatever your passions are, in your mission and all that sort of stuff. So what I want to talk about today is how music lessons, being involved in music, Singing lessons are not— they will not heal you. They will not heal you because it's the intention that you bring into what you do in order for what's going to happen. So I want you to think of it like this, in the most basic form possible, and I think this is a concept that's really easy for people to understand right now in our world, is people who get into a relationship just because society says, right? And this is how we end up with marriages that fall apart because one person was in it because they thought that that's what they were supposed to do by that time and age of their life. It wasn't an intentional, I want this for myself and I'm committed to it. It was an outside— external validation of sorts to live into, as opposed to an internal, I know who I am and I know what I want with my life, and I'm going to take that next step for myself. Okay, not for others, for yourself. This is why I'm 33 and I still don't have a ring on it. I've chosen— anyways, that's another thing. I've chosen to take my time. So anyways, when it comes to music and getting involved in lessons because you're thinking, I need something, keep the movement going. That's really great. But if you're dependent on something to heal you when the nature of that thing is not to heal you— I'm going to say that one more time. When you're dependent on something to heal you when the nature and the design of that space, that thing, that work application is not meant for that. You're living in friction with yourself. So here's what you can do instead, is by approaching your healing wherever you're at and still relying on music, but taking the framework of this is a tool that's going to help me, as opposed to If I do this thing, which is really just triggering overwhelm for yourself. If I do this thing, then that will mean— do you see the difference there? It's really subtle. So when you approach music lessons, for example, and you're like, I want to learn a new instrument, uh, and you are coming to that new instrument with a mindset of, I haven't done enough, That's not setting yourself up for success at all. You can't— like, you can, and if you do this, you know, we all fall to this, I think. But if you set yourself up for work, for joy, for fun in that kind of way of, I haven't done enough, that's all your life is going to be. Or all that thing is going to be. That's all singing is going to be to you. If I haven't done enough and you're approaching it with that, that's all it's going to be. And so when it comes to what I do in holistic voice development and voice coaching and getting you really in tune with this instrument that's in your body, it's built in, it's a part of you, which is why your words matter so much. Because when you say something, when you say I'm not good enough Your body takes that as fact, even though it's not. When you say, "I can never have that," your body takes that as fact. Your mind takes that as fact. And so, so what then? You use the human voice, right? This instrument, the science behind using the voice, and. The science behind music of organizing— what do we do? We organize time and sound and we bring an equilibrium into play. This is what I'm hoping you're tracking with me, is what I do in Holistic Voice Development, where yes, singing can be and is involved in the process of securing that identity shift, right? Of you're no longer this person that's operating out of I'm not enough. You're a person who's operating at I can have anything I want. I just have to keep working at it and keeping it in check. Do you see how that that the difference there? Keeping it in check, meaning if I've been working at this thing for so long and I still don't feel like I have. A benefit that's come from it, that it's reciprocated, then something's off. Something needs to change. Last thing I'll say on this is your voice— it's your regulator, communicator, navigator. Helps you regulate your emotions by speaking out what your experiences are. If you suppress those experiences, even though where they're uncomfortable, they're going to stay where In your system. That's just how we work. That is just how we're wired. If you don't communicate with yourself about wanting things to change and then navigating, taking the steps and the means to get you to that new place, you're not using your voice within its design at all. You're kind of abusing it, honestly, because if you keep saying and keep saying and keep saying that you're going to do something, it just ends up being expressions at the end of the day. That's it. And that is going to make you irritated and frustrated because that's how it works. You have this built-up subconscious expectation now of when is this thing gonna happen, right? But if you're not communicating and navigating how you're doing that for yourself, then you will never have it. I know this was kind of a just open thought process video here, but I want to open the conversation up with you guys about this because I don't think this is something that is largely talked about. Music therapy itself has been a field that's been very new in our world. I studied that a little bit in college and I pivoted into composition because I didn't want to do clinical work, but I still have this passion of helping people with the power of music. So if you're interested Take a look at my free training, Finding Safety Through Self-Expression. This is an intro to my program, Amplify Your Voice. It's a 6-week program to help you make that internal shift where maybe you just feel like you're slightly a degree off and you want to just be locked in and secure in who you are, what you're doing in the world, and why you're here. I've had this struggle myself for very many years, and it took the time of day to actually sit down with myself, be with myself, and hold myself accountable to the things that I want so that I can make that shift and that change. So link for that below, and I'll see you in my next video.