Bunny Young, a retired therapist and entrepreneur, explains how constantly chasing "enough" in money, looks, and career fuels anxiety and depression. She offers three tools: daily gratitude, reframing scarcity as abundance, and having someone hold belief in you until you believe it yourself.
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I want to talk to you about a sickness, a sickness that impacts so many people and actually impacts so many people that it causes depression, anxiety, and even suicide in some cases. And this is not going to be like one of my normal videos where it's funny and humorous and engaging, but please stay tuned because chances are you've experienced this sickness at some point in your life. And I want to admit to you my battle with it, and also to give you some hope and some tools, real life tools that you can use right now in order to help heal just a little bit by the end of this video from this sickness. And as a retired therapist now having five companies, the idea of being successful is this constantly moving target and moving bar. And the thing the voice, the sickness in my head was saying, every time I would reach a certain point, every time I would reach a certain milestone, a certain goal, the thought would be, yeah, but it's not enough. It's not enough money. The car's not good enough. The school's not good enough for my kids. I haven't lost enough weight after having not one, but two babies. I'm not doing enough for our community. I'm not giving enough at church or to the local nonprofit. And this idea of enough is a moving target. It's also one of the worst sicknesses that we have in society right now. Every single magazine cover is showing you what enough looks like. But every single magazine cover, that human that is graced, that magazine cover is retouched. I'm a retired model, and I know how different models and celebrities look in person than they do on the COVID of magazines or in movies. They have entire teams of people to have them look a certain way. And then afterwards, they go in and digitally alter those looks anyway. And so this idea of enough materialistic with your beauty, with your body, with our companies, it creeps into our minds and into our hearts, and it leads to a really unhealthy pursuit of an unrealistic, undefined, undetermined value. What is enough? What's enough money? When you earn enough, when you get to that number, what is the first thing that you do? Be honest with me. What's the first thing that you do? Be honest with yourself. You move the bar, you say, okay, I got it, and now let me go for this. And being able to realize and celebrate each and every day, each and every time, that we just make the world a better place in no matter what tiny, little miniscule way that is with my journal, I have a gratitude practice every single morning and Every single evening. And here is the truth. It was not my most favorite thing in the world. Because when I have a shitty day, the last thing I really want to think about is what am I grateful for? But the answer can never be nothing. I always have, at least up until now, breath in my chest. I have an amazing family. The sun's shining or at least up in the sky, or the moon is up in the sky. There's always something to be grateful for. And yet so often we spend so much time in this space of it's not enough. And the irony is that when we focus on the lack of, that's all we ever see. And when we focus on the abundance, our life starts to look different. Things start to happen differently in our lives. If you and I were in a coaching session and you came to me and you said, bunny, I want to have more time for my family. I want to take this to do list that is 100 items long and learn how to prioritize it. I want to be able to go to bed at night feeling fulfilled and at peace instead of not be able to sleep for two hours because of all the things that's going on in my head that I'm thinking about that I have to get done. And my thought was, I'm not enough to coach this person. It would change our relationship. One of the first foundational things as a coach that I work on is that mindset of belief. Because if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will. Even as a parent, trying to convince my daughters that they can and are enough, that they can do something, that they're capable, it's so difficult when they have had a bad day and they don't believe it. And at times there's nothing I can say to change that belief. But when they believe they can do something and they say, trust me, mom, that goes a long way. And there are clients that I work with, from executive C suite individuals to startup entrepreneurs, that I will tell them, you don't have to believe right now that your goals are possible in order to achieve them, you're going to have to believe at some point. You're gonna choose to believe at some point that your goals are possible. And until that day, I will hold the belief for you. So that you know, no matter what the day looks like, no matter how many horrible things have happened, no matter how many no's you have gotten, that somebody in this world believes in you unconditionally. And that knowledge that somebody believes in us, somebody believes that we're enough sometimes is just enough to have that little tiny spark that starts that flame, that burns, that motivation in order to make this world different. If people looked. If entrepreneurs looked out at the world and only saw what was possible based on what was out there, we wouldn't have so many of the inventions and so much of the revolutionary ideas and items, including our cell phones. You know, if. If there wasn't somebody who said, I believe I'm enough. And that constant pursuit to be a better version of yourself does not negate being enough. In fact, the belief that you're enough is what gives you that foundation to be able to grow from when you don't believe that you're enough. It's essentially like planting a seed in concrete instead of rich, nutritious, plentiful soil. And so today, right now, you have something. You have a thought, you have a belief that you're wondering, am I enough? Was it enough that I did? Did I do enough? Did I say enough? And who you show up as with that question in your mind is not as valuable as the person that you show up with with that confidence, not cockiness, although sometimes a little bit of cockiness is healthy. But that confidence that the path that you're on is the right path. It's the exact right path for you. And how do you know that? Because you're on it. That is what knowing, believing, feeling that you're enough can mean for this world waking up each and every day and knowing that by the simple fact that you woke up and you have life and you have breath, that you are meant to do something tremendous today. And this is not my TED Talk. I actually have another TED Talk if you wanted to watch it. But this is not my TED Talk. This is a video that I want you to be able to play and listen to, to know on the days that you don't feel like you're enough, that there is someone out there, right here, that is holding the belief that you are enough unconditionally for those days that are hopefully few and far between when you don't believe it. Somebody that didn't have that belief for herself did not give her the gift herself. The gift of knowing and believing and feeling on a spiritual level that I am enough. And then the world providing me proof that I am enough versus seeing the world through this lens that I'm not enough. And then the world proving me right, the world proving all of those horrible things that I had in the back of my head that I was telling myself, well, if I believe that the world is flat, then I'm gonna find evidence and proof to support that belief. If I believe, if you believe that you are enough, the world is going to show you evidence and proof beyond a shadow of a doubt that that is true. I appreciate you sharing this time and I hope that you will let me know in one small way, shape or form that I can hold this belief for you. And if you do nothing else, just type below in the comments. I am enough as a contract. Not to me, but to you. And I have an entire playlist that I've made for you full of videos about these motivational mindset hacks so that anything that you want in this world, any dream that you have, whether it's in your personal life or in business or in sports, from my psychology brain, as well as my entrepreneurial mindset, I've created this entire playlist to be able to give it to you so that you can watch video after video that is just going to nourish that soil that the seeds that you're planting are going to flourish from. I hope you check out that video. Thank you for making the world a better place and I'll see you in the next video. Sam.
