Teaching Kids Financial Skills: A Parent's Guide | Anxiety | @caroline-cavanagh

29 Sept 2025 · 2 min

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2:09

In this monologue, Caroline Cavanagh explains how she uses an allowance system to teach her 13‑year‑old children financial responsibility, linking adult anxiety about money to the need for early skill development. She describes giving a reasonable allowance, setting rules that the children must purchase their own casual clothing, sports kits, and gifts. When her son spent most of his allowance on collectible cards, she refused to lend him money and instead presented practical options: earn extra cash by doing chores for neighbors, shop at charity stores for cheaper items, or simply wash and reuse the limited clothing he had for the upcoming holiday. This experience, though uncomfortable for the child, resulted in him becoming adept at managing money. Cavanagh emphasizes the importance of finding the right “leash” – a balance between freedom and guidance – that varies per child and parent, allowing mistakes that become learning opportunities.

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I see a lot of adults that struggle with anxiety because of their financial situation. So giving my children financial skills was really important to me. And when my kids turned 13, I gave them an allowance. It was a reasonable sum of money, more than they'd ever used, used to handling. But the rules were they had to buy all of their own, um, what I call play clothes. So I did school uniforms, sports kit, that kind of stuff, but their shorts, t-shirts, things that they, they, um, kicked around with at the weekend and presents. So any presents for their friends, family presents at Christmas. My son went out with his first month's allowance and bought £50 worth of Match Attack cards, which are little sports cards. We were about to go on holiday and I said to him, right, sweetheart, you need a couple more pairs of shorts and a few more t-shirts because you've only got really got one or two of each that fit. And his face dropped. And I said, well, you've got your allowance now. I was like, I don't anymore. I said, okay. So he said, can you, can you lend me some money? It's like, no, that's not how it works. But here are some options. You could go and knock round all the neighbors' doors and see if anyone needs their lawn mowing or their dog taken for a walk, because that's what I have to do as an adult. If I want more money, I need to go and earn it. Or with the little bit of money that you've got left over, you could go to the charity shops and see if you can get something that fits that's a little bit cheaper, because again, it's an option. Or the other thing is you can take your one pair of shorts and your one t-shirt on holiday and wash them. Every single evening. So he looked at me thinking, she's not going to make me do that. And I did. And I got a slight bit of self-satisfaction every evening he was washing his one pair of shorts and his one t-shirt. So he fell, it hurts, but he's now very good at managing his money. So again, it's just an example of working out for you and your child, what's the level of leash almost that you can give them where they're still going to stray and they're going to get it wrong, but in doing so, they will learn a valuable skill, and that level is going to be different for, for every child and for every parent too.