CSChristoffel SneijdersThree brains: head, heart and gut for decisions you keep deferring

3 Brains Theory Explained: Why Miscommunication Isn’t Caused By The Gender Gap | Communication Tips

20 Nov 2019 · 1 min

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1:23

In this short presentation, Christoffel Sneijders challenges the common belief that men‑and‑women communication problems stem from a gender gap. He argues that the real source of interpersonal miscommunication lies in the presence of three distinct ‘brains’ within each person – the head (cognitive), the heart (relational, love/hate), and the gut (survival‑oriented, fear/anger/desire). The heart brain governs connection and emotions tied to us and others, while the gut brain drives self‑preservation and primal drives. When the heart and gut dominate a conversation, their conflicting priorities create a communication breakdown, regardless of gender. Sneijders uses vivid language to illustrate how these internal emotional centers clash, suggesting that understanding and balancing them is key to clearer dialogue.

Chapters

How many times have you been in a conversation with your friend, your colleague, or your loved one and felt that you just couldn't get through to them? You both understood the words, but neither of you was really hearing the other. I know it's frustrating, and it happens to all of us. And you would think that after millions of years of evolution, we have worked it out and we would understand each other. So how can it be it doesn't work between men and women? Are we really from Venus and Mars? No, the gender gap is not the reason for a miscommunication. What we actually have is 3 brains: one in our head, one in our heart, and one in our gut. And the heart brain is all about us and connection. And it has the emotions of love and hate. And our gut is all about me, survival, and works with emotions like fear, anger, desire, and lust. Now just imagine what happens when those 2 are in charge and start communicating with each other.